First family pic of Elissa, Joe, and Calia Maxwell is up

[Handmaiden of Dog]

They could not find a picture that doesn't cut the top of Joseph's head off? What a crappy photo. You can't really see the baby since it is so bundled up and has that huge flower on her head. What on earth were they thinking? I'm beginning to wonder if that baby has all her limbs.

[Jana814]

Well, would you let your guard down if you were just born into that freak show?! ;) Clearly, she was born with fantastic survival instincts.

Haha!!

[SPHASH]

When I first saw this photo I was sure it was just a stock photo gone wrong.

If Joe and that goddamn headband weren't in that photo, it would actually be pretty cute.

He looks like he's ready to kill and frankly, I'd totally cross the street if I saw him give me that look. Run Elissa run!

The only thing that could be more scary is him approaching you with that look and singing "Channels Only".

[Dru]

Joseph's eyes are evil in this. Absolutely evil. And all I can see if poor lovely Alyssa is a god awful not flattering nose shot. Haven't even focused on the baby yet!!

Yep, that was my thought the moment I saw it. Holy crap!

[CrazyCatLady]

Awkward family photo for sure.

[Emme]

Oh boy... lots of no here.

[fundiefan]

Awful photography.

Hard to tell if they're a happy family or robots.

For the sake of that little girl, I hope they're happy. That child has, what, 2-3 years before her schedule and chore chart kick in? Childhood - over.

[Jana814]

Awful photography.

Hard to tell if they're a happy family or robots.

For the sake of that little girl, I hope they're happy. That child has, what, 2-3 years before her schedule and chore chart kick in? Childhood - over.

Do the Maxwell children even have a childhood.

[Marian the Librarian]

Do the Maxwell children even have a childhood.

Depends! If you're male, you're expected to buy a house debt-free, marry, and produce offspring ASAP. If you're female, you'll be kept in a "sheltered" state of eternal dependence and servitude.

[Dandruff]

Do Maxwells nurse on demand or are babies scheduled from the moment they're breathing air?

That picture of Joseph reminds me of Randall Flagg from "The Stand" (Stephen King). Doesn't give me warm fuzzies, that's for sure.

I think Elissa will be pregnant again by late spring.

[twin2]

Ok. I think you all are being a little harsh here.

I mean, there is not a single steaming tong, wire hanger, air vent, or rolled up electrical cord to be found in the photo. Christopher is clearly progressing in his photography skills.

[AngelGirl8811]

I've seen some awkward family photos but seriously...ugh. There were people who did a newborn shoot with their dog that was more well done than that! :pink-shock: No offense to the people and their dog either. Those pictures were adorable!

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

"Look at this gift with which my mighty penis has blessed you." That was the caption which came to mind. I've never seen anyone look more awkward in photos than Joe. Remember that crazy photo of him hugging Steve at his wedding? Still gives me shivers. :?

[ViolaSebastian]

Ok. I think you all are being a little harsh here.

I mean, there is not a single steaming tong, wire hanger, air vent, or rolled up electrical cord to be found in the photo. Christopher is clearly progressing in his photography skills.

And it's not in front of a restroom. You're right, he's moving up in the photography world.

[Seven Severn]

Ok. I think you all are being a little harsh here.

I mean, there is not a single steaming tong, wire hanger, air vent, or rolled up electrical cord to be found in the photo. Christopher is clearly progressing in his photography skills.

And no white plastic fan, some random person's arm, or curling iron in sight! Good for you, Christopher!

[NotALoserLikeYou]

Lol, twin2, viola, and seven! So true. His pics often have a main subject in front of the worst backgrounds.

This particular pic is pretty horrible, in terms of the main subject, though!

[Naga Viper]

You guys aren't seeing the upside of the white background—an enterprising heathen can easily Photoshop them into any number of forbidden settings. :lol:

[FoxyMoxie]

Wow, that totally looks like stock photography. Maybe a new venture for Christopher? Something to think about....

I totally kept looking for a stock photography watermark :lol:

[Rear Window]

Yes, but you wouldn't want to mistake the baby for a boy, would you?? :o

Have they not heard of pink blankets or onesies? That crochet monstrosity and shitty headband are terrible.

[bionicmlle]

The photo reminds me, a little bit, of the opening to "Big Love" when they did that whole scene with the white curtains, in the white clothes, "other side of the veil" thing. Only this doesn't have the ethereal beauty that that did... aaaaannnnnd now I have the Beach Boys "God Only Knows" as an ear worm. Oh well, better than this photo as an.... eye worm???

[Mela99]

"Look at this gift with which my mighty penis has blessed you." That was the caption which came to mind. I've never seen anyone look more awkward in photos than Joe. Remember that crazy photo of him hugging Steve at his wedding? Still gives me shivers. :?

I can't tell if I'm laughing because that's hysterical or because I'm terrified that that's exactly what he's thinking.

[Dru]

Please tell me Cherry is one of us. Please?

[SolomonFundy]

The picture is a little cold and sterile due to allllll the white, but I don't think it's that bad. It just looks bland. I'd rather look at something like this than one of the grainy shots of Anna-Marie holding alphabet blocks in front of her bump spelling "B A B Y". Joseph obviously adores Elissa, and while his admiration translates to pictures in an awkward way, it still seems sincere.

Now that headband... that's a whole separate bag of crazy. I can't wait until that trend dies.

[clese]

Please tell me Cherry is one of us. Please?

[emoji6]

[mango_fandango]

Do Maxwells nurse on demand or are babies scheduled from the moment they're breathing air?

That picture of Joseph reminds me of Randall Flagg from "The Stand" (Stephen King). Doesn't give me warm fuzzies, that's for sure.

I think Elissa will be pregnant again by late spring.

Hmm. I'd guess they were scheduled, unfortunately. Erika Shupe of Large Families on Purpose schedules her babies. By the age of three months her babies were sleeping 11 hours at night, 'eating' four meals a day every four hours. Erika is a big Maxwell fan. Of course it doesn't mention how to feed babies on the Maxwell blog, but I'd imagine they were scheduled.