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Duggars By the Dozen - General Discussion -14


happy atheist

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Ben and Jessa's pastor was a bit odd. But I liked in that counseling session how he talked about how saving your first kiss is NOT in the bible. 

Their pastor is the guy who does the voluntary missionary trips to Central America.  Those are the trips the family goes on every December and where pseudo-missionaries Jill and Derick were in July.

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This wasn't people being "nice."  This was people obsessed with sex and on some level getting their jollies out of being involved in your supposed sex-education.  Your husband was right that it was voyeuristic.  Ugh.

The most they should have done was to gift you with a book on the basics and a small tube of lube.  And even that... Well, it says a lot about them, doesn't it?

For what it is worth my mother and I were very close, and she had a poor sense of boundaries in many ways, yet I can't imagine that (even if she had not feared to be told that I was no longer a virgin)  she would have offered to have me and my husband call her and my dad if we needed advice about sex on the wedding night.  It is just so intrusive to even offer such a thing!

It seems to me that a lot of fundies who, as a married couple, can have sex, may be a little too inclined to want to share intimate information that should remain private--as witness Jim Bob's famous Suggestive Humping Scene.

 

It really is intrusive. And while I was horrified at the Suggestive Humping Scene (lmao), it didn't really surprise me. I know a lot of fundie parents that are very strongly either "talking about sex is a sin!" or go into explicit detail beyond reason. I prefer the former in conversation with some of these older parents haha 

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To my stupid ex, to Josh, and especially to Michelle's stupid analogy:  Apparently anyone could meet your needs but your wife was the only one who could make you a sandwich.

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I feel like since sex  (or anything sexual period) before marriage is a sin, when they finally do get to have it as a married couple, they all act like (stereotypical in-the-movies) teenagers who brag about it/feel the need to make sure everyone knows they're doing it. It is such a weird disconnect to shield their kids from everything before marriage (NIKE!) but at the same time they are so (obnoxiously) talking about it/hinting at it/dry humping constantly. Is this supposed to make all their kids want to get married and leave the house as early as possible so that Boob has less mouths to feed, more grandkids on the way (kids seem like the fundie version of a shiny car or big house to me...like a status symbol). Sorry, if it seems like I'm rambling. It's just kind of what came to mind.

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Long-time members will probably already know about this, but as I'm relatively new to fundyism, this was new to me. It's an older 20/20 documentary on IBF.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hF_b5kEZyLw

I must say that although FJ has educated me on the extremes these religious nuts are prepared to go, I found the information on beating children absolutely appalling! Hitting a two-week old baby???? What the everloving fuck????? How is this not seen to be child abuse? I'm at a loss for words...

If the Duggers adhere to this... oh, poor Izzy... poor Spud... :cry:

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I just did a search for IFB churches in my area, because a lady in that video said nearly every town has one. I was kind of surprised there is one in my small town but relieved because I don't know anyone that goes there. 

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I just did a search for IFB churches in my area, because a lady in that video said nearly every town has one. I was kind of surprised there is one in my small town but relieved because I don't know anyone that goes there.

I just did the same for IFB churches in my area (Nashville) and the Yellow Pages search result came up with a total number of churches as 666! :Bazinga:

Looking closer, the total number of actual IFB churches in the area seems to be about 10 (Yellow Pages counted every church with Baptist in the title), but man, did that 666 result have me rolling!

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I'm shocked that J'Chelle and  Boob haven't written a  thought provoking post about today  being World Prematurity Day. We all know how much they like to remind us of Miracle Josie's rough start, and miraculous recovery. 

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Probably never heard of it. Would require newspapers and TV.

True. But they all have iPhones. I doubt J'Chelle and Boob's Internet access is restricted. Just their children's. *Eye Roll*

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I just did a search for IFB churches in my area, because a lady in that video said nearly every town has one. I was kind of surprised there is one in my small town but relieved because I don't know anyone that goes there. 

I searched my hometown (small, remote town in CO) and was surprised there aren't any there. I knew a few families growing up that were definitely fundie (long skirts, tons of kids, engagement hand sex, etc.). I could never figure out exactly what "group" they were a part of; they considered themselves Christian, but were clearly some extreme form. We had decent amount of Mennonites and fundie Mormons (a completely different kind of WTF) in the area, but they were clearly different than both of those groups. The more I've learned about the Duggars and their circles, it all seems so similar to these families I knew. I guess I still need to do some digging to try to figure it out. 

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I searched my hometown (small, remote town in CO) and was surprised there aren't any there. I knew a few families growing up that were definitely fundie (long skirts, tons of kids, engagement hand sex, etc.). I could never figure out exactly what "group" they were a part of; they considered themselves Christian, but were clearly some extreme form. We had decent amount of Mennonites and fundie Mormons (a completely different kind of WTF) in the area, but they were clearly different than both of those groups. The more I've learned about the Duggars and their circles, it all seems so similar to these families I knew. I guess I still need to do some digging to try to figure it out. 

I've seen the same thing in heavily Quaker communities in Pennsylvania and New Jersey.  They call themselves "Friends."  When I first lived in southern New Jersey, I was in a town where everything was 'Friends burgers', 'Friends Hardware', etc.  I thought, my what a friendly place!  I later learned that 'Friends' was the name for Quakers.  LOL  The women all wore long skirts, plain colors, zero makeup, etc.  

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Well I have two within 15 miles of me and about 60 within 2 hours driving distance. That is disturbing. Thankfully none in my actual town, but its not one I would except them to like. Its a very highly populated LGBT area. 

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Well I have two within 15 miles of me and about 60 within 2 hours driving distance. That is disturbing. Thankfully none in my actual town, but its not one I would except them to like. Its a very highly populated LGBT area. 

To be clear, I know next to nothing about the Quaker ideology, but I'd sort of assumed that Quakers were on the less-extreme end of anti-LGBT crap. Maybe it's a regional thing. 

The reason I'm kind of surprised is because the Quakers in the Bay Area seem to have a reputation of being much more open and accepting of LGBT folks compared to what's being described here. I know there are Quaker communities both in Berkeley and in Oakland, and the only reason I know that is because I have a friend who is a bisexual, polyamorous trans woman who also associates heavily with Quaker communities, and has for years. Like, she attends house meetings and has Quaker friends and whatnot.

When she was still living in the Bay, she got really excited about landing a room right next to a Quaker house. She seems hesitant to identify herself as one, though, but she has found these communities to be much less toxic and more accepting than the sort of Cool Kinky Queer crowds we've had to deal with as local members of "the LGBT" (which... is a whole clusterfuck of inter-community bullshit that I'm not even going to get into here).

The Bay Area is a really weird place, though, so I wouldn't doubt this being some sort of exception to a general rule.

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There are different kinds of Quakers. There are very conservative Quakers who still wear plain dress and whose beliefs tend to more or less line up with those of other conservative Christians (anti gay marriage, anti abortion and so on). There are Quakers who wear plain dress who are otherwise very liberal. There are extremely liberal Quakers who may or may not even believe in God and whose congregations most definitely welcome LGBT folks. And there's a whole spectrum in between. I don't think there are many conservative, plain-dressing Quakers out there anymore. Or at least they're vastly outnumbered by the more liberal variety.

One of my ancestors was a Quaker and he was disowned from the Religious Society of Friends because he was found to be married to a non-Quaker. This was in the 1700s. Don't think the Quakers are disowning their members for marrying non-Quakers these days!

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I came close. I married a Catholic on Long Island. They were pretty accepting of our marriage, tho. I had to choose a more mainstream Protestant religion tho, to keep the peace w/the in-laws.

And it's 'meeting houses.' Their church is called a meeting house.;-)

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The Quaker groups I've visited and seen have all been "old hippie" types. Lots of folks in their 60s and 70s who get together to meditate and share prayer requests for gun control and legalization of various things. Cool folks.

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The Quaker groups I've visited and seen have all been "old hippie" types. Lots of folks in their 60s and 70s who get together to meditate and share prayer requests for gun control and legalization of various things. Cool folks.

That has been my experience also; I didn't know there were "Fundie" Quakers any more, though I knew all about they used to shun people and all that 100 years ago.  

A friend of mine back in the 90's  was a Quaker and she reported that the worst thing about her congregation was they did everything by consensus (everyone has to agree) so sometimes they would sit for days held hostage by whoever was most stubborn.  As I recall they had no rules about conservative clothing but would get purple in the face if they saw little kids running around and pretending to shoot each other (even when the "gun" was toy elephant).

I guess there are Fundies in any denomination/group that has been around for a few generations.

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I love the Quaker orgs like American Friends Service Committee.  They do such good work.  So do the Mennonites, even though they can be rather fundie.

So, every time I see this thread, I think, "14 threads and counting..."  Am I the only one? Wasn't that the first Duggar special? 

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That has been my experience also; I didn't know there were "Fundie" Quakers any more, though I knew all about they used to shun people and all that 100 years ago.  

A friend of mine back in the 90's  was a Quaker and she reported that the worst thing about her congregation was they did everything by consensus (everyone has to agree) so sometimes they would sit for days held hostage by whoever was most stubborn.  As I recall they had no rules about conservative clothing but would get purple in the face if they saw little kids running around and pretending to shoot each other (even when the "gun" was toy elephant).

I guess there are Fundies in any denomination/group that has been around for a few generations.

As was said there are different groups in different areas. Some peaceful and some very much not.  

Being an animal rights supporter I know there has been a huge issue with some Quaker communities that run evil puppy mills. They don't see the dogs as equal to humans and treat them very badly. They would breed the dogs in small, dirty cages and sell the pure breed puppies (who were often sickly) to pet shops or to people online. Horrible situation. 

Not at all saying all Quakers do this. But it shows they aren't one solid group.  

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I didn't know they had puppy mills. How sad. Our dog came from the pound, a little mutt. My DIL does foster care for dogs. She prefers the seniors. Her little dog that she fostered then adopted just died. She's the best doggie mom I've ever seen.

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