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I don't HAVE TO obey and the Pearls


InkyGirl

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The thread discussing Mikey Pearl's oh-so-great parenting advice for 'Sue's' Mama made me think, and not just baout how evil the Pearls are or about how they should be in jail for their methods, but also about the moment when I was a kid and I realized that I didn't have to do what I was told. Now, every kid has moments of disobedience, but this was a moment where I thought, 'Even if I'm spanked or hit, I don't HAVE to do this, no one can physically make me.'

I was youngish, maybe 11 or 12. I was a pretty obedient kid, I may have drug my feet but I always did what I was told. Even now if someone asks me to do something I'll do it, unless I'm unable to.

But that moment was like a lightbulb. Now, if I had been raised in a Pearl household what would have happened? Would I have been beaten to death?

No matter how hard I was beaten, I still would have had a choice.

Perhaps, little 'Sue' has realized the same thing I did - she doesn't HAVE TO do what people tell her too.

Just some thoughts I had.

Sorry it's a bit rambly.

Anyone else have a moment like that?

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I totally get it. It's how I got through boot camp (army) and boot camp (work out). They tried to be hard on me, but I only do what I consent to do, for whatever reason I choose. I learned the lesson long before then, but that's two times where it was really apparent.

Of course, choosing the action is choosing the consequences, in many ways. As long as I know I'm choosing it, I'm pretty good with the results.

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Viktor Frankl the psychiatrist and concentration camp survivor said, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing; the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.â€

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Mine was with cussing. One day when I was 8 or 9, I suddenly realized that I COULD say "bad" words. Like, I could physically do it and no one could stop me. But, because I was choosing not to because I knew I'd get in trouble and I wasn't even sure how much trouble but I knew it wouldn't be pretty. I kind of extrapolated that and realized that all of my behavior was actually my choice.

Kind of a mind-blowing moment for a little kid!

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