Fundy weddings

[PrairieGirl]

Favorite fundy wedding, no matter the reason:

Pisser and Zsu. Because nothing says "love" like going to a foreign country, seducing a young woman by handing her a Bible tract, convincing her to visit you in the States so you can impress her with your collection of KJV Bibles and your fiery hatred (or secret desire) of teh gheyz, and then basically entrapping said young woman in your country by eloping and not telling anyone until your parents find out about the marriage via the mail.

Creepiest fundy wedding (aside from Maranatha's drawn-out-for-months wedding)

David and Pris. From the groom who obviously didn't want to be a groom, the simple child-like bride, Boob and Mullet (WTF?), Josh and Anna sucking face, Gothard......

Most memorable fundy wedding

Joseph and Elissa Maxwell. Because FJ rocks and I first heard about it here, and then watched in fascination as the brilliant minds here at FJ quickly found out who Elissa was and where she came from. Oh yeah, FUCK YOU, STEVIE!

Most WTF wedding

David and Nadia Botkin. I actually liked their idea of a down home Tennessee wedding. It obviously suited them and they wanted it done their way. However, due to the unseasonably cold weather, it was absolutely freezing that day. So instead of trying to accommodate their guests who came from all over the country by shortening the ceremony, bringing in heaters, closing the barn doors.........they have a TWO-HOUR ceremony with their entire family sitting up on stage on thrones, while guests froze their asses off.

[browncoatslytherin]

now that i've thought a little more about it, i think my favourite wedding is martha and tayte alexander. they were really young, of course, but it seems like they genuinely like each other. their engagement pics were some of the cutest i've seen. and the wedding, while obviously big due to the family sizes, seemed like it still had a more casual vibe to it. i liked the outside area where they got married. oh, and her dress was also not your typical fundie affair with a high neck and sleeves, it looked very nice on her.

[Gimme a Free RV]

Creepiest fundy wedding (aside from Maranatha's drawn-out-for-months wedding)

David and Pris. From the groom who obviously didn't want to be a groom, the simple child-like bride, Boob and Mullet (WTF?), Josh and Anna sucking face, Gothard......

You forgot to mention David "conducting" (if you can call his maniacal random arm swings that) the hymn during the ceremony. He acted so pompous up there, waving that arm around without a clue as to the time signature nor where the downbeats were. Just about the worst fake-musical skill I've ever seen.

[ladyamylynn]

Favorite fundy wedding, no matter the reason- Peter and Kelly Bradrick, for many reasons, but the vows alone were totally insane.

perseveronews.com/the-wedding-vows/

Creepiest fundy wedding (aside from Maranatha's drawn-out-for-months wedding)- Dovey Davis and Mark Willbanks. The unwashed hair, the hideous eye makeup on an otherwise makeup-free face, the two ugly engagement rings mashed together, the mother who looks like a Hee-Haw reject… Oh, I could go on…

melodys-notes.blogspot.com/2010/08/dovey-davis-mark-willbanks-wedding.html

Most memorable fundy wedding- The Seppis meet… the Von Trapps???

melodys-notes.blogspot.com/2009/06/sepulveda-seppi-purcell-vontrapp.html

Most WTF wedding- James Balyeat/Amanda Bagley. Nightmare inducing.

melodys-notes.blogspot.com/2009/11/james-balyeat-amanda-dagley-wedding.html

Wedding you remember, but can't remember the names- The one where the bride and groom donned server caps and served ice cream to their guests. *barf*

The Seppis truly are a treasure trove of creepy weddings. I'd nominate the marriage of Hannah and Bruce...

melodys-notes.blogspot.com/2012/06/newly-weds-bruce-brady-hannah-richards.html

[Eternalbluepearl]

OMG the Morton wedding! I've never read that blog before. They have pictures of themselves saying goodbye to Mr. Mailbox. They also call women Mrs. husband's first and last name. :? The feet washing wasn't the craziest part. :shock:

[Elegant Mess]

I'm going to do Engagements, because I can never sit through Wedding photos:

Since you brought up engagements, I'll bring up vow renewals. In this category, we have the parents of Rebecca Eleventy!!1! The dresses! The Dad's bow tie! Oh my!

hiswayserves-hiswayserves.blogspot.com/2011/10/happy-belated-anniversary.html

[JMO]

The Seppis truly are a treasure trove of creepy weddings. I'd nominate the marriage of Hannah and Bruce...

melodys-notes.blogspot.com/2012/06/newly-weds-bruce-brady-hannah-richards.html

I will second a big THANK YOU! to the Seppis for photographing for posterity all these crazy marriages.

And WTF on that Hannah/Bruce marriage. He literally looks like her father. Gross. :ew:

[Georgiana]

Autumn. She married at 16 on the 4th of July. Her husband started hitting/pointing guns at her. She leaves. Fundies turn on her. She leaves the church.

Candy and Erik Brauer. They went on a mountain or something and exchanged vows- just the two of them.

Worst dress goes to Crystal Paine. Her courtship was serious- no emotions allowed. The story has happy ending because she is mainstream Christian these days.

HOW COULD I FORGET CANDY?!?

Let's not forget the whole context:

Living together while she was underage and he was in his 30's.

Sex before marriage but that was OK FOR THEM because the Holy Spirit said so.

The wedding that was possibly not even legal.

The fact that this story changes every 2.5 seconds.

[VelociRapture]

What is your (with links, if you can get them):

Favorite fundy wedding, no matter the reason

Jessa and Ben - because Jessa literally gave zero fucks about the wedding and as a soon-to-be Bride I can really appreciate that now.

Creepiest fundy wedding (aside from Maranatha's drawn-out-for-months wedding)

Mr. and Mrs. Pecan Thief. Apparently, it resembled a Virgin Sacrifice a bit.

Most memorable fundy wedding

Jessa and Ben Seewald - because Jessa showed some human emotions on camera (I kid! I kid! It was weird to see her get all teary though)

Most WTF wedding

Alyssa and John Webster - simply because of the bright pink and blue colors.

or

Anything Duggar related. Seriously, hire a real goddamn planner!

Wedding you remember, but can't remember the names

Not available.

[Bethella]

Agree!! Does anyone if they r still married? Since they r Fundie I'm sure they r.

Last I heard they were still married

AND their daughter Lauren got married at 16 to a man in his late 20s, although she seems to be a pretty normal Christian mommy blogger. (heartunhindered.com, previously known as Wearing His Purity)

[Grimalkin]

WTF??????!!!!!!!! :pink-shock:

She is such a pretty girl. That made me sad to see her do that.

off topic, at Maundy Thursday mass the priest washes the feet of a few parishioners. The year I converted I inexplicably started weeping during the ceremony. It was touching, and I was so mortified....I could not stop crying. I am not a crier.

[ladyaudley]

Most WTF wedding- James Balyeat/Amanda Bagley. Nightmare inducing.

melodys-notes.blogspot.com/2009/11/james-balyeat-amanda-dagley-wedding.html

their wedding might have been hideous, but they appear to have blossomed into a lovely family and that husband is defrauding me!

[Rachel333]

their wedding might have been hideous, but they appear to have blossomed into a lovely family and that husband is defrauding me!

Even with that mustache?

That was one of the most memorable fundie weddings for me, but they certainly do have a pretty family now.

[ladyaudley]

Even with that tache. Late Victorian/ early Edwardian is my jam ^^

[nickelodeon]

The Balyeats are a very pretty bunch. There is a haunting photo of one of his sisters looking extremely young and doll like in her wedding dress floating around. I always remember it, one of the most striking images to come out of this particular slice of human experience.

[Jana814]

Last I heard they were still married

AND their daughter Lauren got married at 16 to a man in his late 20s, although she seems to be a pretty normal Christian mommy blogger. (heartunhindered.com, previously known as Wearing His Purity)

Thanks for the info!! Do u know how many kids they have.

[DomWackTroll]

Yes, yes-- the Balyeats look fine now and I agree that the husband is hot. But some things can never be forgotten or forgiven, and that Lincoln Log wedding cake is one.

[fiery redhead]

I read the Bradrick-Brown vows. While very biblical, Peter's vows didn't creep me out too much save for addressing her as his "weaker vessel" but Kelly's were almost an SNL parody of fundiedom. Who refers to their husband as "my earthly lord"?

[Emme]

There are few fundie related things I enjoy more than fundie weddings. There are so many ugly dresses... so many weird things happening.

[nausicaa]

The Seppis truly are a treasure trove of creepy weddings. I'd nominate the marriage of Hannah and Bruce...

melodys-notes.blogspot.com/2012/06/newly-weds-bruce-brady-hannah-richards.html

I will second a big THANK YOU! to the Seppis for photographing for posterity all these crazy marriages.

And WTF on that Hannah/Bruce marriage. He literally looks like her father. Gross. :ew:

Seriously--I need more details on this coupling. How on earth did those two get together?

[nausicaa]

Josh and Anna. They are ALSO my favorite wedding, just because it was SO terrible and yet he was SO smug about the entire thing.

He got her freakin balloons. For her ENGAGEMENT. And proposed to her in a restaurant booth.

Then the TERRIBLE SONG HE SANG at the wedding (and was so smug about in the talking head). I cringed. Then laughed. Then cringed some more.

That song! I get the worst second hand embarrassment watching that.

The best is when they cut to the Jim Bob talking head, and he's saying "I think it's something every woman dreams of." Ummm....no. :shifty-kitty:

[Bethella]

Thanks for the info!! Do u know how many kids they have.

7 kids

livinglifeloudly.com/me/

[Jana814]

7 kids

livinglifeloudly.com/me/

Thanks!!

[nokidsmom]

I read the Bradrick-Brown vows. While very biblical, Peter's vows didn't creep me out too much save for addressing her as his "weaker vessel" but Kelly's were almost an SNL parody of fundiedom. Who refers to their husband as "my earthly lord"?

My cousin, who married her now ex-husband during her fundie phrase at the age of 18, referred to him as her "lord and master". :disgust:

[fundiefan]

Seriously--I need more details on this coupling. How on earth did those two get together?

In their own words

hannahbruce.ourwedding.com