Fundie gives birth in car

[polecat]

Have you asked her about this? Or just the mother? Because again...these are not the most truthful people and it's rarely beneath them to viciously manipulate the narrative to make it sound the way they want.

Well I don't know about "these people" and to be clear, I would not know the daughter or the husband if they walked up to me in the grocery store. I only know the mom and a couple of her daughters. While my opinions and viewpoints are the exact opposite of her mom, I do find her to be a genuine, loving person who truly walks in her faith. I've never caught her lying or being dishonest. I didn't even know she used ATI curriculum until I saw another one of her older children posting to another friend of mine 's Facebook page. From my understanding, the ban was prompted by the fact that when she basically fled to get married, her family was hurt and disappointed. There was a lot of sneaking around and texting behind her parents' back, pre marriage. If I remember correctly, they felt she was too young to make a commitment like that. He asked about dating her, they said no, not right now. She did anyway. Her family was disappointed and then out of the blue, they were banned. I can personally say I saw the hurt and confusion, it was real, she was terribly missed during the exile.

[NotALoserLikeYou]

Carolina, did the parents attend the wedding? And then I guess everyone is ok now?

[thoughtful]

This seems to be the church at which the husband's father is pastor:

fbcclute.com/

Jon and Lesia singing (not bad, but the song title and some of the lyrics seem a bit ironic, considering what we are trying to sort out here :? ):

fbcclute.com/sermons/captivate-us/

[carolinagirl1001]

Carolina, did the parents attend the wedding? And then I guess everyone is ok now?

I don't know if the parents attended the wedding. I met her mom through a non church social thing shortly after they got the letter about no contact until whatever date. So I was around during a very rough time. I've never actually met her dad. It was very confusing and foreign to me since like I said, the way I am is very different then the way their family is but I did "watch" via Facebook the hurt when this couple's first child was born. As far as I can tell, everything is okay now and reconciliation has happened.

[Toothfairy]

I don't feel bad for the mother. She's the one who brainwashed her daughter to follow headship. Once your married a woman's job is to keep headship happy. Even if he's abusive that means you're not godly enough. I'm surprised they wear pants.

[CinderJana]

Here is the full video. youtube.com/watch?v=WXEZ6g2WLoM

I'm not saying he's not abusive because frankly I don't know, and not being allowed to see one's mother for a year is definitely a warning sign. Here's what I see from watching the video

He is trying to reassure her in the beginning.

At one point he says do you need to take your pants down and she says I don't know if I can do it.

At about 215 he asks do you want me to stop or do you want me keep going? She says keep going.

Which was probably the best thing to do considering they didn't have a cell phone which begs the question why didn't they have a cell phone?

[Coco]

oh i'm so glad you guys are dissecting this! That guy bothered me too.

1) Having a camera set up seems like they premeditated that it would happen. In the FB comments someone said the parents claimed that it was so they could have a tape of the birth since they didn't have tapes of the other kids being born, but that's strange that they took the time to set it up at a modest angle and waited soooooo far into the labor that their long drive was possibly going to result in a car birth.

2) Posting it online publicly. Even before I knew these people were fundie that seemed fishy, like, oh we can make this go viral and get freebies and paid appearances.

3) The dad telling her to pull her pants down... that seems also like he was trying to get good video over his wife's comfort.

4) The fact that they stopped at a light near a gas station but kept on going. What parent would do that? Wrap the baby, right?

5) How arrogant the dad sounded making medical pronouncements about the baby's health. What if his wife had profuse bleeding?

Anyway, it totally makes sense now that the guy was giving off controlling douchey vibes. The whole thing just seemed planned by the dad for publicity, without much concern for the wife's and baby's possible discomfort or danger, that's the main feeling i got watching that video. :think:

[Coco]

and the way he dismissed her concerns as if she was ignorant.

[zadie]

Here is the full video. youtube.com/watch?v=WXEZ6g2WLoM

I'm not saying he's not abusive because frankly I don't know, and not being allowed to see one's mother for a year is definitely a warning sign. Here's what I see from watching the video

He is trying to reassure her in the beginning.

At one point he says do you need to take your pants down and she says I don't know if I can do it.

At about 215 he asks do you want me to stop or do you want me keep going? She says keep going.

Which was probably the best thing to do considering they didn't have a cell phone which begs the question why didn't they have a cell phone?

I totally agree with you that the husband didn't do anything wrong in my book in the video. The only time I was pissed was when he said "we did it" cause that's bull, but before that everything seemed fine.

I would prefer my husband to act like that in that situation. When I am in intense situations I do not want someone hovering around me and trying to support me, I just want to make it through and the. They can comfort me after. For example, a lot of people talk about having someone "hold their hair back" when they're puking. That is a terrible idea to me. Why do I need you around me when I'm puking? You can't wave your hands and make it go away so to me it's useless. I much prefer practical acts. Such as getting me w glass of water, or continuing to drive to the birth center when I asked you to.

I'm not trying to defend him against abuse allegations, he's FUNDIE so my hopes for him aren't high. But it bugs me that people insist that people who aren't as sentimental and outwardly emotional are uncaring. They just express themselves differently.

What was fishy was why they had the camera set up, why they waited so long, and why they felt the need to post that video.

[Mama Mia]

I totally agree with you that the husband didn't do anything wrong in my book in the video. The only time I was pissed was when he said "we did it" cause that's bull, but before that everything seemed fine.

I would prefer my husband to act like that in that situation. When I am in intense situations I do not want someone hovering around me and trying to support me, I just want to make it through and the. They can comfort me after. For example, a lot of people talk about having someone "hold their hair back" when they're puking. That is a terrible idea to me. Why do I need you around me when I'm puking? You can't wave your hands and make it go away so to me it's useless. I much prefer practical acts. Such as getting me w glass of water, or continuing to drive to the birth center when I asked you to.

I'm not trying to defend him against abuse allegations, he's FUNDIE so my hopes for him aren't high. But it bugs me that people insist that people who aren't as sentimental and outwardly emotional are uncaring. They just express themselves differently.

What was fishy was why they had the camera set up, why they waited so long, and why they felt the need to post that video.

So, so agree with the holding hair back while puking! The last thing I want while I'm feeling awful and vomiting is someone hovering on me :oops:

As far as them waiting so long -- they had already been driving in the car for 45 minutes, some babies do come that quickly. My mom's labors were that fast. She was even accused with her first delivery of lying about being a first time mother, because 1 st baby's " never" came that quickly! As for the cell phone - I saw somewhere else they had cell phones but not service where they were ( it kind of came across to me like maybe they hadn't paid the bill but didn't want to say so - but that's purely speculative :whistle: )

The guy came across a little odd , to me. But although he obviously wasn't going through anything near like what his wife was - we should remember it's a pretty bizarre and shocking situation for him too. He didn't seem mean, she did tell him to keep going, and for all we know the birth center was a minute away, and that's why they didn't pull into the gas station. The " just love him" sounded, to me, like an attempt to keep her from going into shock and freaking out - because the enormity of what happened seemed to be setting in and she was getting nervous.

The rest of their story though.... Woah! Very scary. I'm glad the whole family is reconciled now. But I'd be very , very upset if I was told I couldn't contact my daughter or be around her during her pregnancy / childbirth! But, as others have said, two sides ( at least) to every story. And these people are in a weird cult that even further complicates it. And , frequently, dealing with older teens / young adults can sometimes lead to huge drama in its own right.