Meri (Sisterwives) has a boyfriend er catfish MERGED

[FundieFarmer]

I thought that too, IreneIssh. Very odd that they would try to pitch that there was NO anger from her family.

[defraudingjezebel]

Personally, I think it is telling that Kody never really tried or went out of his way to bond with his daughters until favorite wife Robyn's daughters were of an age and favorite wife Robyn said something. Honestly, if he could have gotten away with it, I think he would have taken only Aurora and Brianna to bond. It's clear he makes more of an effort to bond with Robyn's family than his others.

I think you're both right. I do think that pre-Robyn, Meri was the favored wife. That comes through in the Sister Wives book and in the show (for a little while, at least). I can believe that, therefore, Mariah would be able to leverage that closeness between her parents towards getting enough dough for a private college while her siblings are desperately trying for academic scholarships to cover the cost at a state school.

I do also agree that Robyn has influenced Kody to make an effort to become closer to her kids (and the younger girls, in general).

I think Kody gets a somewhat "good edit" on the show in that he is made to look like he spends equal time with all 4 families, though we know in practice it probably hasn't been that way for a long time. If one of the kids writes a memoir down the line, I'll read it in hope that it will elucidate exactly how these relationship politics played out both pre- and post-Robyn.

[Alexa]

I remember after Aspyn and Mariah graduated from high school at the same time, they were both planning to go on a trip to Europe.....somehow plans changed and only Mariah got to go. Bet money had everything to do with that. With each wife getting an equal share of the t.v. money, I hope each child gets a cut too, but somehow I doubt it. Things like that have to foster resentment between the kids. And when Christine needed money to visit her dying dad Kody told her to take it out of her grocery money, meanwhile Robyn took only Kody and her kids to Hawaii. One big happy family my foot.

Anyway, that Kendra person sounds like a true sociopath, the fact that Robyn ever associated with her says a lot about her own character. I wouldn't be surprised if Kendra's online presence really is Robyn going off the rails or if this entire cat-fish thing was a sinister plan between Robyn and Kendra to get Meri.

[DaisyD]

It sounds to me like he was comparing and outing with daughters being a lot less competitive than an outing with his wives. He wasn't saying wives and daughters compete. He was saying daughters don't compete the way wives do, so it would be easier. That's how I read it at least.

[artdecades]

QFT. I think most of the Browns (Kody, maybe Hunter and some of the other older boys excepted) are a bit more than a touch sheltered. Training one's mind to just "not go there" seems to be a fundie trait; they seem incapable of imagining the worst scenarios. That may be good for some aspects of their emotional lives, but that also leaves them open and vulnerable to a lot of other unsavory situations. Janelle and Mary don't seem especially dumb (v. Sobbyn Robyn, who has yet to convince me of the existence of any non-manipulative brain cells, or Christine, who like Anna Duggar, must struggle to stay so stupid), but do seem especially naive and trusting.

It's the desperation reeking off this scandal which is the saddest part. Meri (and all the other women) would have been so much better off with partners other than Kody. Instead they try so hard to convince the rest of us that they are SO VERY INCREDIBLY HAPPY AND LIVING THEIR BEST LIVES. Maybe they don't want to acknowledge the incongruities of their statements, but then it's left for us to do so.

I don't think it is about being sheltered. I have seen a lot of episodes of Catfish and a lot of the people on that show are young people who are internet savvy. They know its weird that they haven't video chatted, but they lie to themselves because they have gotten attached. They justify that the person doesn't have a webcam or smartphone even though they are so common these days its more likely that someone has one than not.

I definitely think its tied to her desperation and loneliness. The fact that she obviously has low self esteem. But I think in that state, someone can convince themselves of anything.

[Eternalbluepearl]

In the new People article, it makes it sound like Meri was duped by a businessman, not duped by a boyfriend. The spin is strong with this one.

[MsSaylor]

I'm a little behind on the show and just watched the episode where they build the cardboard boats. It was freaking bizarre the way Robyn was acting towards kody. I've never seen her act that way towards him. I think it was faked to make it seem like she's just like the other wives and fights with Kody too-see not the favorite. And Robyn and Christine we're bonding over their mutual annoyance with Kody. I just thought it was odd. Hilarious that they couldn't paddle the damn thing.

I also thought it was strange how Aurora was just bawling and bawling over her father signing over his parental rights. Dayton seemed to understand and be be skeptical of the whole thing. That kid is amazing. He must struggle so much with the chaos and stupidity of that mess he lives in.

[DaisyD]

Considering the family Robyn's ex comes from, I wouldn't be surprised that Aurora is glad to be away from him. The Jessops have been marrying girls her age off to middle aged men for generations. I know very little about that particular Jessop, but it wouldn't surprise me if he had made some comments to her about wanting her married. It's a status improver to give daughters to men in power. Christine and Meri's extended families have also done this, but it appears that this family has rejected that practice. The only girls potentially at risk were Robyn's, since if their dad got custody, he could do that to them. This is, of course, assumption. I just don't think it's that big of a leap that Aurora would be so relieved to know that there's no way anyone would be marrying her off now.

[zadie]

Considering the family Robyn's ex comes from, I wouldn't be surprised that Aurora is glad to be away from him. The Jessops have been marrying girls her age off to middle aged men for generations. I know very little about that particular Jessop, but it wouldn't surprise me if he had made some comments to her about wanting her married. It's a status improver to give daughters to men in power. Christine and Meri's extended families have also done this, but it appears that this family has rejected that practice. The only girls potentially at risk were Robyn's, since if their dad got custody, he could do that to them. This is, of course, assumption. I just don't think it's that big of a leap that Aurora would be so relieved to know that there's no way anyone would be marrying her off now.

I only have Robyn's side of the story (I haven't looked into the family at all) but even just from the hints she made on the show it sounded like he was a pretty huge dick. He didn't seem to be very loving, particularly toward Robyn. Even a dad like Kody who can't give you as much time, plus a big family filled with siblings and mothers would seem like a dream come true.

Also, some people are just more emotional than others. I have a friend that can cry over anything even slightly emotional, happy or sad. It wouldn't take much to get her bawling lol.

[DaisyD]

The Jessops (Robyn's ex) and the Allreds (Christine's family) are long time polygamist family names. There are a number of Jessops in Colorado City (Warren Jeffs groupies). I don't remember what family name Meri comes from atm, but it's another one. Christine and Robyn's ex are cousins (not hard to do with so many kids from so many women). There are quite a few family crossovers with the Browns, though nothing that seems super strange to me in a relatively small community. They're nothing like the family wreaths you see in FLDS and The Kingston Group (all of whom have Kingston in their blood line, and are discouraged from hanging out with even half siblings since they may marry one).

My fascination with polygamists goes way back. Maybe knowing what I do is why the Browns just seem like people living their faith and doing the best they can, even when it's hard. Kody is a knight in shining armor compared to most of the men we hear about in polygamy. He's extremely progressive. Maybe it's because he was raised LDS and came to polygamy later on.

[bionicmlle]

Considering the family Robyn's ex comes from, I wouldn't be surprised that Aurora is glad to be away from him. The Jessops have been marrying girls her age off to middle aged men for generations. I know very little about that particular Jessop, but it wouldn't surprise me if he had made some comments to her about wanting her married. It's a status improver to give daughters to men in power. Christine and Meri's extended families have also done this, but it appears that this family has rejected that practice. The only girls potentially at risk were Robyn's, since if their dad got custody, he could do that to them. This is, of course, assumption. I just don't think it's that big of a leap that Aurora would be so relieved to know that there's no way anyone would be marrying her off now.

I can see how a child might be in fear of this however I doubt this was a driving concern from Robyn, Kody or even any of the other moms. Even if the worst had happened and Kody and Robyn died and Aurora had returned to her bio-dad's care, if Christine, Meri or Janelle had heard about any under-age marriage, I am relatively certain they would call CPS at this point, if not the media. I think we can snark a lot about this family, but one thing that seems clear to me is that they love all their children.

[DaisyD]

And that they understand what that means better than many of the people in their families (Christine's at least). Still, I can't imagine how terrifying it could be to a girl seeing the way many women not only look the other way, but sometimes abet the actions of these men. I'm more than a little suspicious of the reasons he didn't want his kids on the show in the first place. My husband wouldn't either, so it could just be not wanting their lives made public, but with that family, I kind of doubt it was that noble.

[IreneIssh]

Read through some of the catfish's posts yesterday, and thought it was very interesting that Meri was (supposedly) saying that she couldn't leave Kody YET, because the show was still on the air. And also from the texts, it would seem that they did meet, but I think it's probably more likely that the texts are made up entirely. I can't believe the catfish is still going. I wonder when they'll finally knock it off, and if TLC will ever respond with more than a blurb in People magazine. 

[silverspoons]

Considering the family Robyn's ex comes from, I wouldn't be surprised that Aurora is glad to be away from him. The Jessops have been marrying girls her age off to middle aged men for generations. I know very little about that particular Jessop, but it wouldn't surprise me if he had made some comments to her about wanting her married. It's a status improver to give daughters to men in power. Christine and Meri's extended families have also done this, but it appears that this family has rejected that practice. The only girls potentially at risk were Robyn's, since if their dad got custody, he could do that to them. This is, of course, assumption. I just don't think it's that big of a leap that Aurora would be so relieved to know that there's no way anyone would be marrying her off now.

As someone who lives in Southern Utah (not by choice), it bothers me that the name Jessop, Allred, Barlow, Holm, Jeffs, etc make some people think they are devout FLDS. David Jessop Sr. Robyn's ex , has not been shown to be active in the polygamist faith, in fact the opposite seems to be true, that he has left the AUB. Robyn and David took a second wife and he was the one that did not like plural marriage and ended the second marriage. He moved away to rural MT, where there is no AUB church or following and has not remarried or had anymore kids.

I counted back and my kids have had 9 teachers over the years with the last name Jessop, Allred or Barlow. I would guess like many residents of Southern Utah these teachers have polygamy in their roots. It might be as close as one generation. I am probably labeled the most pushy mother to get what my kids need in the overcrowded underfunded Utah education system and I picked only the teachers I thought best for my kids. There was a Allred and Jessop that were incredible teachers to my son who has autism. In fact the Allred teacher that would stay till 9pm once a week to meet with us because of my husband's work probably is one of the biggest factors that my son is a doing so incredible in high school. I'm sure her FIL was a polygamist but her husband left and I would never judge her or anyone else on a last name.

Also every year I watch Jessop's, Barlow's, Allred's and many other polygamist kids graduate from high school. They have just left polygamy but still visit their family in Colorado City/Hildale area. It is a proud moment to see kids work so hard to graduate instead of crying that they are lost or turning to drugs. Many have to work a lot harder to catch up on required classes.

There is a local church that takes in families that are leaving polygamy. Many have these last names. Many times the wives and kids don't change there dress overnight. It is a hard change. I recently talked to a Jessop that had kids at my child's school. The kids dressed mainstream but the mom still  wore the polygamist style dresses. She said after 50 years she had a hard time changing her clothes but she has 100% left and is so hopeful for the future for her kids.

[DarkAnts]

the AUB did not approve of the show. Perhaps Robyn's ex is just following AUB directives. 

[FundieFarmer]

@silverspoons, how does it work for the mainstream children to visit their FLDS family? I was under the impression that "apostate" family members were not allowed to return. I was confused, though, when the Lisa Ling episode showed several "apostates" living within the FLDS communities. I'd love some insight, if you have any. 

[DarkAnts]

The houses are no longer owned by the FLDS trust, so non members can rent or buy housing in the community.

[closetcagebaby]

@silverspoons, how does it work for the mainstream children to visit their FLDS family? I was under the impression that "apostate" family members were not allowed to return. I was confused, though, when the Lisa Ling episode showed several "apostates" living within the FLDS communities. I'd love some insight, if you have any. 

I'm curious about this as well...it has always seemed that they've kept themselves as separate as possible. It probably doesn't help the membership rolls to show people doing well and happy outside of the cult.

 

It was very strange the first time I saw a family tree that showed just how interconnected all the polygamist families in that area are. Yeesh.

[FundieFarmer]

The houses are no longer owned by the FLDS trust, so non members can rent or buy housing in the community.

MMM, you're right- I forgot that. But I would think being let into the houses that are occupied by FLDS members to visit would be a different beast. The pieces I've read seem to indicate that they shelter themselves from outsiders, like closetcagebaby said (hilarious name, btw). It is surprising that they visit, though it's entirely possible I've completely missed something.

[DarkAnts]

I don't think they visit on a regular basis. The only exception may be court mandated custody visits. 

[bionicmlle]

Read through some of the catfish's posts yesterday, and thought it was very interesting that Meri was (supposedly) saying that she couldn't leave Kody YET, because the show was still on the air. And also from the texts, it would seem that they did meet, but I think it's probably more likely that the texts are made up entirely. I can't believe the catfish is still going. I wonder when they'll finally knock it off, and if TLC will ever respond with more than a blurb in People magazine. 

Yes, I also read WAY too many of them. I don't think they are made up just because it does seem to be Meri's "voice" but also "sam's" tone is very feminine. Nevertheless, it seems that they did indeed meet at Disneyland and had some physical contact and Meri didn't mention anything about being concerned about him not looking like the photos.  It's all very strange.  Makes me think more people were in on it - maybe the catfish got some guy to go with them on that trip to snuggle up to her? I don't know. It's a mess.   Reading the texts made me feel a little dirty - both of them are so needy and desperate and manipulative.

 

But, as someone said on Shelter, yesterday, Meri is, in effect, a catfish herself.  Trying to fool the world that her marriage is hunky-dory on this reality show about her life while obviously things were falling apart and she was looking for fulfillment elsewhere.  

[closetcagebaby]

I just finished binge watching Catfish while recovering from a wicked bad cold and it really just highlighted how believable it is that Meri would get caught up in something like this. Sad, lonely, isolated people who really need some attention are so susceptible to shitty internet sociopaths.

[bionicmlle]

@QueenofHearts  We were talking in Shelter about the Disney trip -- the discussion on the March 7 post initially talks about meeting at various places in the park, how excited she is, Mariah getting a blister, etc etc., Then there is a 4 hour gap around 1900, "I wish we were alone together today for you to pull me into your embrace, kiss my neck and run your fingers through my hair...."   Then later "I want your lips but you know we can't, not after last night."  (that context is weird?)

 

He says "I think last night opened you up sexually" and she says "I think you did" and he says "that was new for you."  

 

I don't know... It could go either way, I suppose.  Obviously, however, Meri is not sexually satisfied in her current arrangement....  

[FundieFarmer]

Let's think about this for one very terrible second. 

Let's say those texts aren't fabricated in the sense that Meri truly did hook up with someone on that trip. Who would that person have been, and how violating would it have been for Meri to find out that it wasn't actually this Sam she'd fallen in love with? If she think she's texting Sam, but it's really Jackie, and yet they're discussing any sex they may have had...who was the person? 

That said...I do think the texts were fabricated. Or at least I wanted them to have been. I have no idea what's going on now.

[ClaraOswin]

I am so confused. So did she meet an actual man at Disneyland?

I skimmed the texted from that date and it seemed like they were constantly trying to find each other in the park or something.