Sexual loopholes

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Hmm. That's very convenient? I guess I understand but admit I'm having a little trouble getting my head around it. Seems like it can't be both ways but with logic like you've explained, I suppose it makes some sense.

The thing with people who are fundies or are fundie-lite is that they don't really need logic to explain their beliefs. I mean, look at creationism.

[moreorlessnu]

The only regrets i have about the experiences my hubby and I had before marriage are if it grieved God but I am starting to think that love is love... while fear and hate, and using someone else selfishly, are the real sins.

This.

[RosyDaisy]

I have no regrets living with my husband before we married. Nope. None whatsoever.

ETA: I take that back. I regret not hooking up with him the day we met. But I was a chaperone for little kids from church touring the Space and Rocket Center. Damn we had some physical chemistry going on when he put that band-aid on my knee.

I hope he reads this.

[polecat]

Yes, absolutely I understand that. My question pertains to what these kids actually believe. So far there has been no indication that any of the now adult Duggar kids (for example) have strayed from their parents' Gothard decreed training. So we therefore surmise that they will be raising their families in much the same manner, although, granted, we don't know that with certainty yet. Can the same be said of the kids who engage in illicit 'romantic' activities? (I'm having difficulty expressing this coherently.) In other words, if a child 'sins' by breaking courtship rules, for example, then does it follow that they don't actually BELIEVE that they are sinning and, by extension, that they don't BELIEVE the 'teachings' of their parents? Does the action negate the belief? (If this isn't making sense just carry on without me. I need a latte or something.)

The vast majority of the people in the stories I recounted are still fundies of various flavors today -- not all ifb but all still definitely sucking down that kool-aid. They find ways to justify their actions -- they were backslidden, the devil tempted them, they weren't yet saved, etc. (Any good fundy knows you can't lose your salvation, but you sure can get saved a bunch of times if the first 50 didn't actually take, and getting saved is like a "get out of jail free" card because it totally wipes the slate clean).

Me? I was never a good kool-aid drinker. I *wanted to be a good Christian, desperately actually, but the life was just too restrictive and I liked sin too much (sin being watching TV, kissing boys, etc.). I felt so darned guilty the first time I wore pants (as an adult!) and yet it still felt so incredibly freeing.

[Coco]

Me? I was never a good kool-aid drinker. I *wanted to be a good Christian, desperately actually, but the life was just too restrictive and I liked sin too much (sin being watching TV, kissing boys, etc.). I felt so darned guilty the first time I wore pants (as an adult!) and yet it still felt so incredibly freeing.

ikr? :lol: That was the weirdest mental space to be in -- going somewhere as a generic member of society after years of brainwashing and trying to tell myself that it made sense to have religious rules about the most insignificant things. For instance they tried to make us feel like a bad person for wearing certain colors. But just realizing those rules were silly and dressing in a normal, comfortable way... The invisible prison, gone.

There is a reason fundies dress themselves so oddly, and it isn't modesty.

[apandaaries]

The thing with people who are fundies or are fundie-lite is that they don't really need logic to explain their beliefs. I mean, look at creationism.

That weird religious exemption some people feel they personally have when they have abortions is the strangest bit of cognitive dissonance.

A good friend of mine worked at a Planned Parenthood for a few years and volunteered elsewhere with health and sex ed talks. She spoke with a LOT of women who claimed to be very religious and pro-life, yet had had an abortion in the past. Almost all seemed to think themselves special cases who needed and deserved that medical care, but the other women who'd had abortions were evil baby-killers.

The old research used to be that Catholics (who were obviously prohibited abortions in their religion) had the most abortions. I wonder what the data is like now, and if the data collectors are updating for these newer crops of fundies.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

That weird religious exemption some people feel they personally have when they have abortions is the strangest bit of cognitive dissonance.

A good friend of mine worked at a Planned Parenthood for a few years and volunteered elsewhere with health and sex ed talks. She spoke with a LOT of women who claimed to be very religious and pro-life, yet had had an abortion in the past. Almost all seemed to think themselves special cases who needed and deserved that medical care, but the other women who'd had abortions were evil baby-killers.

The old research used to be that Catholics (who were obviously prohibited abortions in their religion) had the most abortions. I wonder what the data is like now, and if the data collectors are updating for these newer crops of fundies.

More than seven in 10 U.S. women obtaining an abortion report a religious affiliation (37% protestant, 28% Catholic and 7% other), and 25% attend religious services at least once a month. The abortion rate for protestant women is 15 per 1,000 women, while Catholic women have a slightly higher rate, 22 per 1,000.

http://www.guttmacher.org/in-the-know/c ... stics.html