Raquel won't date you if you can't handle butchering animals

[ari_belle]

I miss talking about Raquel. Let's talk about how ridiculous Raquel is.

 

itsjustraquel.com/2015/04/54-reasons-i-will-not-date-you.html

[KittenMitten]

It seems as if Raquel likes talking about Raquel, also. Is she such a great catch?

[Burris]

As soon as I saw the title - "54 Reasons I Will Not Date You" - I knew this would be good snark material: Long, revealing - perfect!

The list is a jumbled, self-contradicting mess where priorities appear in no particular order. And, of course, no post such as that would be complete without the hypocrisy.

Raquel doesn't waste any time going from 'zero to ridiculous' in this list: Her first point concerns whining.

That is one on her list. Not kindness (which appears nowhere on her list) not humour; whining.

The man cannot be a whiner - although she hastens to add that whining can be "cute" if one knows how to "do it right." (In other words, Raquel probably read Total Woman and believes in the double-standard that women can be foot-stomping whiners as long as they're wearing heels and pearls while doing it.)

Her ideal man cannot be a smoker, a drug user, a gambler, a regular drinker, a nerd for Star Wars or cars (etc.), or a habitual gamer with the temerity to argue any point on Raquel's list. But he has to be willing to act as her leader (as mentioned in point 14).

The most telling and immature portion of the list on reaching number 11 is she doesn't want to date a man who speaks about his ex-girlfriends. Sorry, Raquel, but most of the men you'll date did have lives before meeting you - and those lives may have included other relationships.

If you find a man who habitually "trashes" ex-girlfriends, he's the one to avoid; but if previous women come up in conversation about events in the man's past, that's the way of it: He did have other girlfriends, and he did enjoy time out with them. It's asking entirely too much of a man to expect he will pretend there were no other woman, ever, before his current; that he should edit his conversation because his current girlfriend is insecure about women from the past. (Raquel mentions the exes again in point 32; if the man speaks too kindly or fondly of them, he's not good enough for her.)

Among the nuggets of "wisdom" contained in her post is that a man happy with his life is unfit for her majesty because it's apparently impossible to be content where you are and also to want additional challenges.

So far, then, the man she wants has to have no past, no passions beyond naked ambition, and no hobbies of which she does not approve.

He can't think sex is gross, but he can't have boudoir photos of Raquel either.

He can't be a picky eater but he has to want to eat healthy. But he shouldn't be too obsessed with his own workout schedule, as according to point 43.

No drunk texting in point 18. (LOL!) No drunk dialing in point 37.

And, honestly, on Raquel's list of things that would disqualify a man from dating her is if he uses social media shorthand in his texts (point 20).

Bad grammar? Bad man! (I've read some of Raquel's other posts; she shouldn't be so quick to judge other people by their writing ability - or, more accurately, by their lack of it.)

Music is apparently one of Raquel's own hobbies. If a potential boyfriend says he could live without it, then he's 'undatable.' (But if he plays video games or owns Star Wars materials, he's the devil's spawn.)

Point 25 is that this man, who can have no unapproved hobbies or interests of his own, must at least try to enjoy the things that move Raquel.

27 is about butchering meat 'if he had to' LOL! Anyone can butcher meat if they have to: People will eat rats and grass and dirt if they have to. Why in hell would that even be on a list?

28 is of the same type: A man who can't handle the sight of blood is unfit to date.

Just how much fucking blood is Raquel planning to shed in her ideal relationship, anyway?

In point 42, however, Raquel mentions her ideal man must have a sense of style (although, given she wants a man with no pre-existing personality, it's difficult to tell on what this style would be based).

And does that mean he wears a paisley rubber apron when he butchers the family dog for food to keep Raquel alive during the period leading up to Armageddon?

Point 36 is she wants a man who can have not only an intelligent conversation but an "edifying" one as well.

In point 47, Raquel pre-emptively demands "space."

"S P A C E"

What the fuck does that even mean? I'm quite serious; what does she mean by this? Because if one is living with a husband and things go wrong, you could be sharing a double bed in a rental room.

From what I've observed, "S P A C E" does not really exist in long-term relationships. Everything, including time, becomes common property. (Her demand for "space" matches up with point 51 where the man is unfit if he needs Raquel's attention.)

And how does any of this match up with her expectations that her future husband would take any sort of leadership position? Moreover, she speaks several times on her list of a desire for children? Does she really think the kids are going to give her alone time at any point in the first five years of their lives?

The man needs self-confidence (point 50) - but not enough to have his own strong interests (points nine, 15, 16, and 43) or to be happy with his current position or career (points 13 and 44).

In point 48, Raquel states she does not want a control freak. (She's be happier if she were to admit to wanting either an equal relationship or one where she is the dominant partner, but she won't - even despite how nearly every point on her list - for example, point 52 - either leaves her free to do exactly as she pleases whenever she wants or places serious limitations on what her mate can like, do, eat, and want.)

Points 53 and 54, on a 54-point list, concern that the man must share a common religion with Raquel. (That should have been somewhere near the top; that they have common core beliefs.)

Raquel is looking for a true Stepford Husband. It's amazing.

She might want to consider creating a list of reasons for why any man should consider dating her.

[DGayle]

She wouldn't date me since I'm a married woman. She didn't say a penis or being single are required.

32. Still talk kindly and over-the-top sweetly about your ex-girlfriends.

Something I like about my husband is how he doesn't talk bad about any of his exes. Unless somebody cheats or is abusive, is there really any good reason to talk about what bitches the exes are?

2. Talk too much about yourself and never ask questions about me.

Pot, meet kettle. It's calling you black.

10. Argue. (Especially with no valid reason.)

14. Can't take the role of leadership.

Hm. If you want a man to be the leader, then YOU are the person who shouldn't be arguing.

34. Don't realize your shortcomings and areas you need to work on. (I'm not saying you have to become a better person for me, but just know where you need to change...for the better. Not for me.)

To be with her, you have to want to improve, and improve for her, while she'll say it's not for her.

I can agree with a lot of the things on that list, but then she takes it too far. Jesus, maybe she's looking for reasons to not date, and doesn't want to be open about it.

[formergothardite]

Did you read her ask.fm where she explained that she has been not dating guys? According to the world's standards she is dating guys but according to hers she is not, so she still hasn't had a boyfriend, even though according to most people she has. :roll: She really wants to say that she only dates the guy she ends up marrying so none of these other guys count. And then she has the other blog post about all the guys she has totally not dated at all and broken up with. Combine this with her long list of reasons she won't really date a guy and it is clear why she can't keep relationships. There is having high standards and then there is having unreasonable expectations where the person has to always agree with you and always make you happy.

[Mary C Doates]

Miss Raquel needs to pay attention to her own list of rules. #1: no whining (as she whines through pretty much every post on her blog)....

ETA: "pleonastic wordiness"--God gave her a thesaurus.

[Grimalkin]

I find her marriage advice interesting. Who would listen to her marriage advice? How old is she? I could not find it. I think she should hook up with Jacob Pennington.

[formergothardite]

Burris thank you for going through her long list of demands. I started it and then gave up. Raquel is one of those people who sadly have not grown and matured as she grew older, she just continues being self-absorbed. It is like with her claiming to have never dated any guys when she also admits that what she does is what almost every other person would call dating. She is so caught up in her fantasy world where she only dates the guy she ends up marrying that she can't admit the reality that she is no different from any other 20 year old.

From her blog post about the guys who she didn't date:

Guy 1 who sounds like a nice person but who couldn't tolerate how unreasonable Raquel is:

I remember that evening so clearly. We were on the phone. I was sitting, cross-legged, on my bed, holding the ear to my phone, hearing your deep voice I had grown to love. But I didn't like what you were saying. We got in an argument about something that I felt so strongly about in one way, and you the other

We mutually agreed that a more serious relationship wouldn't work, because this topic would always come up in conversation and would mostly like ruin anything we started.

Since Raquel views any tiny disagreement as important This could be anything from a really important issue to something like him mentioning he doesn't like her favorite band. Raquel thinks she can find a man who always agrees with her on every single subject because she can't stand the idea that she isn't always right.

Guy 2 who it sounds like he wasn't really into her but she made it into more than it really was.

She claims that she didn't like him at first but he became attracted to her and he stumbled and stammered saying that he had feelings for her and at that moment she realized she had feelings for him. It sound like the plot to a rom-com she watched and since she has a tendency to exaggerate I bet that it didn't happen this way.

We did well at hiding it from our friends. To this day, many people don't know you and I were sort of a 'thing'. But then, you told me that you felt God was encouraging you to stay single, to work on becoming a man, and not to involve a girl in your life yet.

Yeah, I'm thinking the reason none of your friends know you and this guy were a "thing" Raquel, is because you weren't. And that last line right there was him nicely trying to tell you he wasn't interested in you. You did not get the hint at all.

It was difficult. I hated not having any closure. It was like I felt committed to you, but at the same time, I didn't. I had no clue what the heck was going on. The fourth of July came around. I invited you to come watch fireworks with my family. 'I'm gonna be out of state, staying with a friend and her family.' Her? Well that was interesting... I should've known then.

This guy was sending every single hint in the world that he was not interested in Raquel even letting her know that he was spending time with another girl, but Raquel still doesn't pick up what he is telling her. I think she has a hard time accepting that a guy would reject her.

The week after, you called to tell me that we couldn't be together because you had a lot of life things you needed to work on and you 'felt God telling you that you weren't ready for a relationship'. I honored that. Because all I ever wanted was to help, support, respect and bless you. Four days after that phone call, I opened my Facebook and the first post to greet me was you smiling, your arm around a dark-haired girl, announcing that you were 'in a relationship'.

Clearly you have to be very direct with Raquel because it has been clear from the beginning that this guy was not into her and was just making up excuses to try and get her to leave him alone.

I cried the first day, was calm and cold the second day.

Oh yes, I bet Raquel started plotting her revenge which includes this blog post. I bet all of their mutual friends know exactly who she is talking about, but I doubt they are going to think he is a jerk.

And I hope that every time you go back there, you think of me and remember the wonderful times we had. But most of all, I hope you remember how much I was always there for you, faithful to you even if we weren't 'official', and how I wish I would've seen how little of man you really are because obviously you didn't have the nerve to tell me to my face that you were interested in someone else. And that that was the reason 'we couldn't work out'.

She is bitter about this. It doesn't seem like they ever dated and he made it clear from the beginning he wasn't interested in her. I don't think this is the bitterness of a broken heart, it is the bitterness of a bruised ego. Raquel is furious that he didn't like her and chose someone else.

Guy 3:

I found you through a hashtag on Instagram. Pretty cute way of finding someone, if ya ask me. We commented back and forth for a bit before exchanging numbers (which I basically never do).

So she Twitter stalked a guy and gave him her number?

We talked and talked...everyday...for a couple weeks. And then you told me that you still really liked your ex-girlfriend.

He is just not that into you Raquel.

We lost contact for a while, but then you randomly called me (I was in the shoe section at Walmart), seeking advice on how to get back together with her. And I helped. Cuz that's what I do.

Really, he isn't into you!

Anyway, they eventually start dating(except Raquel says it isn't dating :roll: ) and things are going well but then this happens:

The last straw was when you told (not asked) me to 'make time for you because you were needy'. Now, Guy #3, everyone is needy. Even the strongest men I know have their needy moments. But to voice your need for attention sounded like a five-year old little boy who wanted mommy to come hug him

This is rich coming from Raquel who has tweeted over and over again about how needy she is and how she will flip out and be furious if she calls a guy and he doesn't answer his phone immediately. It is okay for Raquel to demand that others revolve their lives around her, but it is wrong for anyone to expect her to spend time with them. And she can't just say that it didn't work out, she has to then go bash him and talk about how he isn't a real man and imply that he wanted her to have sex with him. IMO they either never dated and she is making it a bigger deal than it was or they did date, he dumped her and she is trying to make it look like she was the one who rejected him. She is really, really angry.

I have men in my life who have shown me what a real man is, have challenged me to raise my standards higher, and who are men I look up to for wisdom and advice. You weren't really measuring up to that. I am so glad I never gave you what you wanted, never did anything with you that I would regret now, never let you force me to do anything,

Raquel says that her parents called and told him to leave her alone and makes him seem like a crazy stalker. With anyone else I would probably believe this, but this is Raquel, the girl who had a hysterical fit and made her parents go have a conference with another girl's parents claiming that the girl was spreading horrible lies about Raquel when all the girl had done was say that she thought Raquel like a guy. And when all her sexting stuff came out it ended up that the girl was right!

In the post about this guy she can't even seem to make up her mind if he is an abusive, controlling asshole who pushed her to have sex with him or if he is:

To this day, whenever I tell someone about you, I always stress the fact that you are, above all, a man of God. Despite your flaws, despite the reasons we didn't 'end up together', you will always have my respect in regards to your strong beliefs, and confidence in defending the Word of God.

That entire blog post seemed like it was just trying to get back at these guys and make them look bad while she looked like a saint.

This is what she says to her future boyfriend:

I haven't met anyone who could keep up with me. Not only to love me too, but to challenge and embrace me. I also know what I want and need and am looking for in a man. My standards are high, sure.

She would reject anyone who would challenge her and while she should have high standards she needs to make sure they aren't unreasonable. Her eleventy point list about what she doesn't like in guys shows that she is completely unreasonable.

he is someone godly, someone who I can trust and who trusts me, someone who has proven his care and affection and loyalty to me. A man who complements me, who understands me, who wants to study me even if we've known each other for years. Someone who is strong, yet gentle; stubborn, yet willing to be wrong; firm, yet forgiving. And that man will be one who will be there beside me through thick and thin and I would always be able to depend on his stability and compassion for me and everything life throws our way. This man will have to be one who also needs me, who will fight for us, always pursue me and not give up at the first rough patch we hit.

I'm not perfect. I'm not easy. I'm a fighter and will argue for my point to win. It takes a lot to earn my trust. I speak what's on my mind. And I'm also pretty selfish. I can hide what I'm feeling very well. I can cover up my pain when I feel it's needed, but I want a man who can gently pry my fingers away from clutching at my hurting heart and gently kiss the tears away. I want a man who looks beyond my figure and physical appearance to love on and connect with my soul. I want a friend, an equal, a man who I can respect and submit to, a lover, a fighter, a leader - not only for me, but for our future children.

Don't give up on me when I push you away. Don't give up on me when I disagree. Don't give up on me when I don't show you affection. Don't give up on me when I tell you to leave me alone. Don't give up on me when I'm being impossible.

So basically Raquel wants a robot who comes immediately when she wants him, doesn't ever need her when she doesn't want him around, puts up with her being childish, mean and selfish while never being those things and who says he is a leader while really letting her make all the decisions. There is no human who lives up to her expectations.

[Trynn]

I actually don't blame her for needing to be told directly about guy #2. Some people just are not good at reading body language or getting hints, and you need to be blunt and direct. I'm one of those people who os so socially inept you'd have to hit me with s hammer and then I still might not get the hint.

How old is this girl, 19?

[alba]

Have no other hobbies besides video games. (If you even actually consider that a hobby.)

Are utterly obsessed with immature things, to a point of I-theme-stuff-after-this. (Pokemon, video & computer games, Star Wars...)

So video games are immature and not a real hobby? Elitist much? Oh, right, this is Miss Raquel we're talking about. Never mind.

[polecat]

I miss talking about Raquel. Let's talk about how ridiculous Raquel is.

itsjustraquel.com/2015/04/54-reasons-i-will-not-date-you.html

It's nice of her to put that flashing neon light over her head so that men know to avoid her like the plague.

[formergothardite]

I actually don't blame her for needing to be told directly about guy #2. Some people just are not good at reading body language or getting hints, and you need to be blunt and direct. I'm one of those people who os so socially inept you'd have to hit me with s hammer and then I still might not get the hint.

How old is this girl, 19?

Raquel is 20. I do think that it would be better to be direct, but at the same time Raquel goes crazy if a guy is direct. You can't win with Raquel unless you are worshipping her and telling her she is always right. I suspect this is the guy who spoke to her at a party and then she wrote an entire story about him on her blog. I think this guy was trying to let her down nicely and let her know he liked her as a friend but that was it. If he had been direct about it she would have written this saying that he was mean and rude.

In other news the band Raquel started didn't last long enough to sing their first song together. It wasn't Raquel's fault, it was the other people for not being dedicated like they should(or realizing Raquel is a crazy control freak). She is in another band now. No songs from them yet.

[twin2]

Well, that would be an interesting question on a Courtship Questionnaire....

Are you able, and willing to butcher an animal...

I'm not familiar with Miss Raquel. Is she a self-declared SAHD ala Lina, or a parent dictated SAHD?

[Emme]

How is she ever going to be in a happy relationship? Relationships, while wonderful and fulfilling, are not easy at times and can require work, communication, and compromise. It doesn't seem like she's at all prepared for that.

[Full enough quiver]

I can see the video game thing. Being a gamer would absolutely be a deal breaker for me. I HATE video games, to the point where they're not allowed in the house. I absolutely would not even consider a guy who liked them, they annoy me that much. But I don't consider people who enjoy video games to be bad people, or less mature than I am. I would assume that a gamer wouldn't want to be with me. Why be with someone who can't stand your hobbies? It's fine to have standards, and to know there are certain things that are deal breakers for you. But what's in it for him? What are you doing to be worth dating?

[formergothardite]

Well, that would be an interesting question on a Courtship Questionnaire....

Are you able, and willing to butcher an animal...

I'm not familiar with Miss Raquel. Is she a self-declared SAHD ala Lina, or a parent dictated SAHD?

Neither, she is just a really spoiled 20 year old who likes to pretend she isn't like everyone else. She lives at home but a lot of 20 year olds do. She has no desire for college but it isn't because of her religion, it is because she doesn't think she needs to learn anything. She works, travels, hangs out with friends, dresses like a typical 20 year old, dates(even though she doesn't call it that) any guy she wants, and when things don't go her way she throws a massive fit and gets her parents involved. She likes to put on a show about how deeply religious she is, but she really isn't.

Her parents seem to give into her every whim and never seem to tell her no or that she might be wrong.

[Grimalkin]

She sounds like the Fundie Alanis Moressette.

[Palimpsest]

Neither, she is just a really spoiled 20 year old who likes to pretend she isn't like everyone else. She lives at home but a lot of 20 year olds do. She has no desire for college but it isn't because of her religion, it is because she doesn't think she needs to learn anything. She works, travels, hangs out with friends, dresses like a typical 20 year old, dates(even though she doesn't call it that) any guy she wants, and when things don't go her way she throws a massive fit and gets her parents involved. She likes to put on a show about how deeply religious she is, but she really isn't.

Her parents seem to give into her every whim and never seem to tell her no or that she might be wrong.

I agree with FormerGothardite. Although I'd just boil it down to: Raquel is a spoiled, entitled, self-centered, boy-crazy little brat. But she loves God and should probably just stick to having Jesus as her boyfriend.

What does Raquel have to offer in any relationship? I suppose she's reasonably attractive looking (in terms of conventional ideas of pretty) and is in her child-bearing years (if potential boyfriends are interested in reproducing in the future.)

Other than that I'm stumped. Apparently she is too because she never seems to address ways in which she could improve herself. And there is a lot of room for improvement.

[formergothardite]

I'm not even sure Jesus would be able to make it as Raquel's boyfriend. :lol:

Raquel: JESUS! I called you and you took 30 minutes to return my call! Don't you love me?!

Jesus: I was healing the blind and feeding the poor. I was wee busy and didn't get a good signal.

Raquel: OMG! You and your hobbies! It is like you value them more than me! Why can't you just listen to the bands I told you I liked so we can discuss them? I told you to listen to them today! You know I can't tolerate people who don't value music!

Jesus: Raquel, be reasonable. These were blind and hungry people. Don't you think they is more important than some Christian rock band?

Raquel: WHY DO YOU HAVE TO ARGUE WITH ME!!!! WHY CAN'T YOU JUST AT LEAST TRY TO ENJOY THE THINGS I LOVE!!! YOU ARE SUCH A JERK!

Jesus: :? :shrug:

Raquel: Goes off to blog about the guy she almost dated but didn't because he wanted to control her and never spent time with her.

[Palimpsest]

^^^^

:lol: :lol: :lol:

But didn't Raquel once write a whole long-winded post about Jesus being her boyfriend?

[formergothardite]

^^^^

:lol: :lol: :lol:

But didn't Raquel once write a whole long-winded post about Jesus being her boyfriend?

She did. She was not only God's Daughter, she was also God's Girlfriend. But I think that the Jesus she is dating is the one she created in her own image. The only person perfect enough for Raquel is Raquel.

If she manages to get married I don't see the marriage lasting long.

[GotCaughtDancing]

What the hell did I just read? Of course I didn't stop there I read some more and finally ended up in her about me section. She states right off that she is not good at writing about herself, yet her blog screams otherwise. Her list is a treasure and I don't know about you but I can't wait until she finds the one. You know it is going to be snark melee' comparing him to her list. :lol:

[Palimpsest]

She did. She was not only God's Daughter, she was also God's Girlfriend. But I think that the Jesus she is dating is the one she created in her own image. The only person perfect enough for Raquel is Raquel.

If she manages to get married I don't see the marriage lasting long.

How long was her relationship with the horse God gave her?

Sorry, I don't keep up with Miss Raquel. She's too annoying!

[formergothardite]

What the hell did I just read? Of course I didn't stop there I read some more and finally ended up in her about me section. She states right off that she is not good at writing about herself, yet her blog screams otherwise. Her list is a treasure and I don't know about you but I can't wait until she finds the one. You know it is going to be snark melee' comparing him to her list. :lol:

Have you read her bucket list? :lol:

She still hasn't bought anything on Etsy. She did make a cheesecake, though. I can't wait till she tries to hug a baby polar bear or pet a swan. Her grandparents also better hang on till she snags a man or they will fuck up her bucket list.

[formergothardite]

How long was her relationship with the horse God gave her?

Sorry, I don't keep up with Miss Raquel. She's too annoying!

I don't think anyone knows because she didn't say when she got rid of the horse God gave her. It seems like it was maybe six months, though. She quickly tired of having to do things like give it food and water. God help the poor thing if she ever has a child.