Daughters And Disney - Merge

[FJismyheadship]

childrenareablessing.org/2013/06/25/daughters-and-the-disney-channel/

[Maggie Mae]

Demi Lovato of Camp Rock and Sonny with a Chance fame was also making headlines for “cutting†herself during this time period. Lovely. How was I supposed to explain this to my daughters?

You say something along the lines of: "Demi Lovato has a mental illness, hopefully she'll recover quickly. It's really very wrong that the magazine/TMZ/reporters are talking about it like it's any of their or our business."

I grew up and remember having a conversation with my dad about someone on a TV show (Growing Pains?) having bulimia. They told me what it is, that she was sick, and that she needed to leave the show for a while to get better. Problems with child actresses and actors getting older is nothing new. Before whats her name from Hannah Montana grew up, Britney grew up. Lindsey Lohan grew up. Shirley Temple grew up. Drew Barrymore grew up in the spotlight and did drugs. Macaulay Culkin. Gary Colman.

I have no problems with limiting TV. I have problems with parents who decide that somehow everything is evil and bad and this is all new.

Was allowing my young daughters to watch television which included girls wearing immodest clothing, having boyfriends too young, talking back to parents, etc. glorifying God? Was allowing my girls to watch these immoral stars glorifying to God? That would be a loud and resounding NO. I should have been placing godly examples before their eyes!

Why does everything have to glorify God? Why can't something be entertainment for the sake of entertainment? There are people I know who are equally boring with their hobbies. Everything they do must have a reason and a benefit. Watch a movie, it needs to have a message, or be a reinforcement of some sort of language skill, or they write a review on it to practice their critique skills. Go out to eat? Let's make sure we invite so and so because they would be a good person to know and put in my professional network. Let's go for a hike - Okay, but only because I need to try out some new gear to prepare for this race/event/blog post. Just enjoy it already.

And "having boyfriends too young"? Really? I know it seems young, but that's because we've infantized and coddled our teenagers. Didn't Mary, the mother of Jesus, get married at 13 (to a 27ish year old man who had, by all accounts, already impregnated her)? It's not like the show are about 8 year olds.

[DGayle]

Tracy Gould from Growing Pains suffered from anorexia.

The focus on EVERYTHING being "glorifying to god" really seems like a metal illness sometimes. Hear me out on this! They are so incredibly OBSESSED that it seems like OCD. If things aren't "glorifying to god" or all about god, or god god god god GOD, then they're stressed and worried, and they structure their whole lives around their obsession, and think that they have to do this to show they really love god. It's like OCD borne of fear of punishment by hell.

I think it's sad that their kids can't enjoy things because OH NOEZ not "glorifying to god"!

[momof2treasures]

I will agree about the talking back stuff though. The kids on all these tween shows are rude and sarcastic. I have to remind my child that this isn't real life, and if you made some of those comments in real life it would be rude and hurtful . I still let him watch though. Sometimes you have to talk to your kids.

[DGayle]

I will agree about the talking back stuff though. The kids on all these tween shows are rude and sarcastic. I have to remind my child that this isn't real life, and if you made some of those comments in real life it would be rude and hurtful . I still let him watch though. Sometimes you have to talk to your kids.

"You mean the right thing to do isn't to ignore things? I must look into this 'talk to the kids' idea," said no fundie, ever. 8-)

[tigerchild]

We have never had cable and my kids have never really liked TV.

Guess what?

All of them had the backtalk and rude behavior as preteens. I think to some degree obnoxiousness must be a developmental stage. It doesn't mean that you have to tolerate it long term, but when I hear stuff like "well my kids would never talk that way since we don't watch Booty Call Boytown High on Disney Channel!" I have to wonder what ages of children these people have. I certainly thought that I'd never have mouthy teens--when my kids were 6,5, and 5.

[Shadoewolf]

I was a very picky parent early on, and we didn't do the whole Hannah Montana craze even though my oldest was the right demographic at the time. We control what our kids watch and the games they play, TO AN EXTENT. My kids don't like Disney shows so we don't watch them. They've seen just about every Disney/Dreamworks movie, Transformers, Avengers, etc. We really do just talk to them about the things they see.

We also make points while out in public, like when we see a kid mouthing at his/her parents, we point that out and how it must make people feel..and my younger kids shake their heads and say they would never talk to us that way. People adore my kids because we raised them old school, please..thank you...yes sir/ma'am, holding doors for people, giving up their seat for seniors or pregnant women.

That said my oldest daughter is about to turn 15, and even with eliminating certain influences as a kid, she can still be a mouthy, disrespectful obnoxious little shit. And short of taking away her electronics and time with her friends (which does NO good), there is little I can do about it anymore, the state dictates how I can discipline my kid. Its the age I think, and the social pressures of school and society. Most of us just grow out of it, although if the population and work ethic of the small little town I live in is any indication, I am seriously scared for the future!!

[roddma]

Hannah Montana was Jamie Lynn Spears. I think Mary was 16. I could agree about the boyfriends too young-Mary likely had an arranged marriage to Joseph and thankfully we have grown brains as a devloped society. Statutory rape and child rape laws rape laws are here for that reason- to protect innocent kids. As far a back talk, it's part of being a kid. Fundies just expect every kid to be perfect and you know it's impossible. I think if the shows featured too perfect kids it wouldnt be real. yea talking and explaining why this is bad behavior helps. There are many shows that do teach value without religion. Maybe "God" doesn't tell us everything in the BIble so we can learn through other channels using our brains.

[Geechee Girl]

Hannah Montana was Jamie Lynn Spears. I think Mary was 16. I could agree about the boyfriends too young-Mary likely had an arranged marriage to Joseph and thankfully we have grown brains as a devloped society. Statutory rape and child rape laws rape laws are here for that reason- to protect innocent kids. As far a back talk, it's part of being a kid. Fundies just expect every kid to be perfect and you know it's impossible. I think if the shows featured too perfect kids it wouldnt be real. yea talking and explaining why this is bad behavior helps. There are many shows that do teach value without religion. Maybe "God" doesn't tell us everything in the BIble so we can learn through other channels using our brains.

Actually, Hannah Montana was played by Miley Cyrus. Jamie Lynn Spears starred in Zoey 101 which was cancelled due to Jamie Lynn's pregnancy.

[elsabee]

Actually, Hannah Montana was played by Miley Cyrus. Jamie Lynn Spears starred in Zoey 101 which was cancelled due to Jamie Lynn's pregnancy.

Oh God, I remember when that happened. I think I was in tenth grade. Everyone freaked out about it -- "she's almost our age!" But very much not our business, nor does it have anything to do with the shows these kids are watching.

[Geechee Girl]

Oh God, I remember when that happened. I think I was in tenth grade. Everyone freaked out about it -- "she's almost our age!" But very much not our business, nor does it have anything to do with the shows these kids are watching.

Yep, I hated how all the pundits like Rush were throwing Jamie Lynn under the bus asking "where were the parents?", but when Sarah Palin's daughter was with child, the tune suddenly changed to "It's a family issue, sanctity of life, & right to privacy." :roll:

[Mama Mia]

When my kids were tweens/young teens, I always found the storylines of those shows, or real life problems of the actors--to be a really good way to bing up conversations without it sounding like a lecture. I could give my opinions, get their opinions in a much more natural way.

Especially with my more private kids - it was really the best way to share ideas

[Rescinded and Mended]

My son always enjoyed The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, also Wizards of Waverly Place. I did make it a point to tell him that it wasn't okay to sneak around to get into trouble and talk back like the boys on Suite Life did in the early episodes (that got a lot better over time), or mouth off like Selena Gomez in Wizards. He was always pretty good about minding, though. He's a bit more headstrong now that he's in his teens, but I still try to talk things out with him instead of automatically saying, "We are not discussing this, end of story." Sometimes that's hard, because he doesn't always want to take no for an answer, and kids become young attorneys in their teen years - they've got an argument for everything. :lol:

I never liked the character of Hannah Montana. I enjoyed the show, but that was because every supporting character was funnier and more interesting than the lead (kind of like Seinfeld). She spends the entire series whining about wanting to be an ordinary girl and hating her celebrity status. If you really feel that way, honey, than why not just walk away and quit complaining?

[louisa05]

When my kids were tweens/young teens, I always found the storylines of those shows, or real life problems of the actors--to be a really good way to bing up conversations without it sounding like a lecture. I could give my opinions, get their opinions in a much more natural way.

Especially with my more private kids - it was really the best way to share ideas

Boys Town has a whole program for parents and teachers based on this exact thing. I went to a workshop on it at a staff inservice back when I taught in Catholic school. It talks about how to engage the culture to teach morals and ethics rather than censoring and banning. Part of the philosophy is that unless you keep your kids in a cave (and granted many fundies basically do), they will be exposed to all of this stuff whether we as parents or teachers like it or not. So instead of taking it away, not allowing them to watch it/listen to it/read it, it is better to watch/listen/read it, too, and talk about it. Boys Town is extremely cognizant of not every family teaching the same faith (or any faith), morals or ethics, too, so they talk about simply asking a child or teen, "how does (that character's choice) go with what we have talked about at (church/home/school) about situations like that?"

[O Latin]

I do think she makes one good point when she says that her daughters still thought of Miley Cyrus as Hannah Montana, even after she "grew up" and stopped associating herself with that character. The actors and actresses on these shows are generally older than their target fan base so they grow up before their fans do. I can see how that would be tough for even non-fundie parents. Perhaps it would be a good time to have a discussion about how celebrities aren't necessarily good role models.

[louisa05]

I do think she makes one good point when she says that her daughters still thought of Miley Cyrus as Hannah Montana, even after she "grew up" and stopped associating herself with that character. The actors and actresses on these shows are generally older than their target fan base so they grow up before their fans do. I can see how that would be tough for even non-fundie parents. Perhaps it would be a good time to have a discussion about how celebrities aren't necessarily good role models.

I went through that discussion with my first class of confirmation kids last year. When we started talking about picking a sponsor and who the adults they admired were, half of them--in seventh grade at the time--went straight to celebrities. I had to literally explain that Taylor Swift or Alex Gordon or Rex Burkhead would not be showing up to be their confirmation sponsors. I think parents maybe don't have that conversation early or often enough.

[Freefundies]

I wish that the Disney shows would really attack the true issues that are happening with the kids today using those famous Disney stars to speak out in good ways for educational purposes. All the Disney daughters listed above should be doing PSA's to advise kids not to do drugs, bullying, social media trolling, sex, etc. but you don't see one of the Disney darlings do this (certainly not Miley, Selena, Zack twins, etc.). In fact the bad behavior just continues to get worse. Miley can't seem to keep her close on and loves to show everyone that its okay to do drugs. Demi already had rehab for a number of issues and certainly Brittney has hit a lottery on the bad behavior as well.

A neighbor who has a 13 yr old boy told me yesterday that she monitors his phone and that he has been talking to a girl. Then the hammer came down. The 13 year old girl he's been talking to has already sent him a topless picture and she is already developed. When exactly did it become okay to advertise nudity for teens. I guess I know who will be pregnant when their 15. The neighbor said she blocked his phone and he informed the girl of same in school but I would've advised her parents what she had done. I think both the kid and the parents need heavy therapy. This is where the world is at.

[drivingmishcrazy]

*coughs* not to come off as leghumpy, but Demi got help and came clean about her issues a while ago and does a lot of work trying to talk to people about mental illness, self-harm, drug and alcohol abuse, and eating disorders, setting up a fund for people who need to get help for their issues but can't afford it on their own, speaking engagements, etc. So I'm not sure how that's exactly relevant when she's more than turned her life around and trying to encourage others struggling to seek help?

[Freefundies]

Yes I agree that she has come clean and did a tour on the talk shows to bring some of it forward but then it sits. Millions of $$$ get thrown at issues everyday and yet the problems still exist (ie. look at what Microsoft has thrown at Africa and the clean water issues). These stars need to start doing something different to bring it forward but just putting it out on a talk show here and there isn't answering the problems and many parents don't care to deal fully with the issues.

[JillyO]

I wish that the Disney shows would really attack the true issues that are happening with the kids today using those famous Disney stars to speak out in good ways for educational purposes. All the Disney daughters listed above should be doing PSA's to advise kids not to do drugs, bullying, social media trolling, sex, etc. but you don't see one of the Disney darlings do this (certainly not Miley, Selena, Zack twins, etc.). In fact the bad behavior just continues to get worse. Miley can't seem to keep her close on and loves to show everyone that its okay to do drugs. Demi already had rehab for a number of issues and certainly Brittney has hit a lottery on the bad behavior as well.

A neighbor who has a 13 yr old boy told me yesterday that she monitors his phone and that he has been talking to a girl. Then the hammer came down. The 13 year old girl he's been talking to has already sent him a topless picture and she is already developed. When exactly did it become okay to advertise nudity for teens. I guess I know who will be pregnant when their 15. The neighbor said she blocked his phone and he informed the girl of same in school but I would've advised her parents what she had done. I think both the kid and the parents need heavy therapy. This is where the world is at.

You know what prevents girls from getting pregnant at 15? Educating kids and teens about safe sex, not shaming them for their sexuality.

[FJismyheadship]

So a girl sends a guy a topless photo and she is immediately doomed to become pregnant within the next two years???

So much wrong.with your post, stereotyping and shaming is just the start of it.

[Trynn]

I think this behavior is normal for 13 year olds. They're teenagers and they're curious. I don't think sending a nude picture is the end of the work or that it means she's destined to be a slut. God if people knew all the stupid shit I did at 13 youd never guess I was a stable adult.

[Freefundies]

You know what prevents girls from getting pregnant at 15? Educating kids and teens about safe sex, not shaming them for their sexuality.

So a girl sends a guy a topless photo and she is immediately doomed to become pregnant within the next two years???

So much wrong.with your post, stereotyping and shaming is just the start of it.

I think this behavior is normal for 13 year olds. They're teenagers and they're curious. I don't think sending a nude picture is the end of the work or that it means she's destined to be a slut. God if people knew all the stupid shit I did at 13 youd never guess I was a stable adult.

Wow, Just gotta say some of you are fairly mentally ill especially in regards to your children but once again parents not properly being parents and trying to say I'm shaming girls. By allowing your Underage daughters to take naked photos of themselves and disciminate them to other children is the same as child poronography. In FACT, this law applies all across the country. Not to mention that by allowing your teen to pass that content (even if just a naked selfie) to another teen whose parent may be able to view all said content (especially if they have the software to do so), you have then disciminated child pornography even though it was your child who sent it. After all you are the parent of said teenager

Trynn and your perfectly okay allowing your daughter to share her content with the world. Oh, and another educational experience is that a whole other Internet called the Black Internet runs to download illegal child porn to share with all those sick people who want to see your child naked. Now you've been educated.

But more cases in point, please read the following about teens and early sexuality from Psycholoy Today and even think progressL

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/re ... al-content

http://thinkprogress.org/health/2014/08 ... es-earlier

Oh and to those choosing to allow their kids to discriminate child porn, here's a little reading for you to:

http://criminal.findlaw.com/criminal-ch ... -know.html

[Freefundies]

Frankly I'm shocked by a response by another parent on this forum and I find that parents need to be properly educated about a very important topic: child porn.

Background as to why I bring this up. My neighbors son who is still 13 has been talking to a girl in school. My neighbor is a responsible parent and will do checks on his phone (at least 2 or 3 times a month). She noticed this 13 yr old girl sent a selfie of herself topless and she was already developed for her age and of course wanted a selfie of neighbors son back which he knew was wrong and immediately blocked the girl. I posted this on another thread about "Disney and Daughters" and one parent responded back stating that its fine all 13 year olds do this today but it is highly illegal and all parents should know it.

I am a degreed law professional. Once a child forwards a naked selfie to another child this is the equivalent of child porn and dissemination of same. Although the girl meant for the boy to see it, if his parents have softwares (similar to Duggars seeing all their kids info.) or do as my neighbor did in viewing it afterwards then the parent has viewed said picture exposing the parent upon opening selfie text to child pornography. Apparently Trynn, thought this was all innocent fun but there are an awlful lot of laws and very strict jailtime and fines for those who view child porn. Once you see it you can't unsee it. If my neighbor choose to press charges the police would certainly have done so and both the girls parents and the girl would've had a very large attorney bill and quite a few headaches to come not to mention a lot of public disgrace along the way.

I also find it appalling that people don't choose to recognize that everything over the phone and the internet gets recorded. In fact, national news 2 weeks ago noted there is a new internet called the Black Internet which specializes in collecting child porn and disseminating same (so to those parents whose kids take naked selfies, just realize it is permanently stored in a Cloud somewhere waiting to be downloaded on some pediafile's home computer for life.

http://criminal.findlaw.com/criminal-ch ... -know.html

Everything is not art and please educate yourselves because this is becoming more of an issue especially with teens.

[FundieFarmer]

I don't think anyone is saying they'd want their child to send photos like that anywhere. I think people are simply saying that one stupid action by a teenager doesn't define who that person is forever in the general scheme of things. It all depends on the parents and how the situation is handled.

I actually came here to say that regarding the Disney stars, I think it's a crying shame that parents strive so hard to shield their kids from others' struggles. If I'd known that other kids and stars my age were going through what I was feeling, I probably wouldn't have felt so alone, and that would've been worth its weight in gold on its own. Parents need to be very proactive in sharing the realities of the world with their kids.