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Bates women vs Duggar women


Raecheal
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I don't know... I'm not sure if I can compare... well let's see one by one:

1. Erin apparently scored a loving, caring, adoring husband if everything's as sugary as it seems. She's apparently happy.

2. Alyssa outsmarted her parents, fled to Florida, changed her wardrobe and she's not under Bitch Kelly's control anymore (see Kelly's attempt on controlling Zach and Whitney's weekend activities. Or more like, limit them to Bible studies.) Alyssa only showed herself for a brief ten minutes for the cameras, and keeps most of her private life to herself. She doesn't rely on a jobless grifter and won't have to mooch off his teenage son for grocery money. She doesn't need to sell her privacy for cash. I like what she did with her life.

Then:

Dill: what the hell does Derick for a living? They would have had the chance to travel the world together and have an exciting life. No, screw dat, let's get knocked up, live off of TLC's money and live in Jimbo's property, completely under his control. Good job.

jessa: she married a teen who "works for his dad", so they are completely at jimbo's mercy. She is a newlywed and all she worries about is telling off tens? hundreds? of millions of people, using harsh and condemning words and destines them for eternal damnation. Not exactly a pretty sight. I'm appalled by her but at the same time I'm grateful that she discontinues to play it sweet and lets the whole world see the duggar values for what they really are. I'm not entirely convinced that she's overjoyed with her life.

As to Michael Bates' pal: he doesn't come off neither mellow, or romantic or too interested in her girlfriend. Michael, on the other hand, seems desperate.

Zach and Whitney would be totally happy and jolly with their lives if Kelly wouldn't try to shit all over ther happiness all the time and wouldn't try to express her disapproval of Whitney with her "suggestions" regarding even their free time.

PS I wonder if Derick and Jill have ever had a deep convo about Derick's past relationships because I doubt that he's been a virgin for 27 years holding out for a fundie virgin.

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Ben's a tool (IMHO). But then, so is Jessa (IMHO).

I like Derick, despite the cat incident. I think he has a better chance of supporting a large family (and of supporting education for his kids) than Ben, Chad, or Brandon because of his college degree.

I think Chad is genuinely sweet and puts Erin and her well-being ahead of religious rules (hence, deciding with Erin and the doctors how many kids they will have).

I worry about John just because his father is a politician, so his family's livelihood has been religious ultra-conservatism. That can make it harder to leave. It's hard enough to leave behind a community and beliefs, let alone leaving behind your financial livelihood. We'll see. I've never seen any indication that John himself might be a tool.

I worry about Brandon more, though, because he seems drunk on the Kool-Aid (working in Gothard's headquarters) and that whole incident where he kind of shamed Michael for "lying" to surprise him with a visit stands out as controlling. Hopefully, that's a one-off, and he's really just a nice, brainwashed man.

So... I might give the Bates a slight edge, but I wouldn't say it's a landslide victory.

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I think Chad is genuinely sweet and puts Erin and her well-being ahead of religious rules (hence, deciding with Erin and the doctors how many kids they will have).

So... I might give the Bates a slight edge, but I wouldn't say it's a landslide victory.

Yes and yes.

Especially the bolded one. Amen to that.

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The Bates girls have better husbands by far.

Alyssa Bates' husband took her far away, set them up in a cute house in Florida and appears to adore her. He most likely has good fundie connections with his father being a senator and will probably always have a steady job. He also introduced Alyssa to the world of pants and pierced ears.

Erin's husband Chad is a total sweetheart who has held her hand through all the fertility issues and even lets her squeeze him while giving her shots. Can you picture Ben handling things that well? Chad also moved Erin into a cute house without her parents' help and has his own job. He seemed very genuine with the little Bates when they spent the night at his house.

Michael's fiancee is hard to read, but she appears to be crazy about him and at least he isn't an obnoxious teenager openly criticizing everyone on Instagram. It is doubtful Papa Bates is going to be able to push him around.

Whereas Ben is a flipping teenager who lets the Duggars/Jessa push him around and treat him like a lawn boy. He also seems highly competitive over everything even though he does nothing himself. What's his job again? If it weren't for the Duggar money what would these 2 be doing to survive? It wouldn't be possible.

Derrick is a good catch for Jill, but after the cat video and seeing how willing he is to go along with Jill and Jim Bob's plans for everything, he doesn't seem all that great. I won't be surprised if he snaps after a few more years of Jilly Bean smothering him and having 4 or 5 kids in 5 years. He did grow up with just 1 other sibling, probably had his own bedroom, and was comfortably middle class, he has no clue what is coming. Having 2 or 3 kids in diapers at a time and a baby constantly on Jill's breast is going to be a good wake up call.

To be superficial, another plus, the Bates husbands are all quite handsome. Ben is cute, but not that great and Derrick just looks sickly in my opinion.

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Ben's a tool (IMHO). But then, so is Jessa (IMHO).

I like Derick, despite the cat incident. I think he has a better chance of supporting a large family (and of supporting education for his kids) than Ben, Chad, or Brandon because of his college degree.

I think Chad is genuinely sweet and puts Erin and her well-being ahead of religious rules (hence, deciding with Erin and the doctors how many kids they will have).

I worry about John just because his father is a politician, so his family's livelihood has been religious ultra-conservatism. That can make it harder to leave. It's hard enough to leave behind a community and beliefs, let alone leaving behind your financial livelihood. We'll see. I've never seen any indication that John himself might be a tool.

I worry about Brandon more, though, because he seems drunk on the Kool-Aid (working in Gothard's headquarters) and that whole incident where he kind of shamed Michael for "lying" to surprise him with a visit stands out as controlling. Hopefully, that's a one-off, and he's really just a nice, brainwashed man.

So... I might give the Bates a slight edge, but I wouldn't say it's a landslide victory.

I've only ever seen them together in that one scene, but that wasn't my take at all. Instead of shaming I thought he was teasing her, like: "Ha ha, miss perfect lied!" I do think he's every bit as Kool-aid drunk as Gil and Kelly, but then again, so is Michael. They seem very compatible to me, she looks ecstatic every time she talks about him and marriage in general, and as biased as I am against fundies in every respect, I don't doubt that there are couple who genuinely love each other and treat other well. Michael seems to genuinely like her lifestyle...I think she's the only one I've heard say flat out, "I want as many kids as possible," instead of "I'll have as many as god wills."

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IMHO, In order of desirability

John

Chad

Derrick

Ben

Brandon

It's possible I could change my mind, but so far, Brandon gives me a *major* case of the creeps. Michael too, so I guess they're well-suited to each other :(

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IMHO, In order of desirability

John

Chad

Derrick

Ben

Brandon

It's possible I could change my mind, but so far, Brandon gives me a *major* case of the creeps. Michael too, so I guess they're well-suited to each other :(

Heh, yeah. Those two are perfect for each like Jessa and Ben are.

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I don't know... I'm not sure if I can compare... well let's see one by one:

1. Erin apparently scored a loving, caring, adoring husband if everything's as sugary as it seems. She's apparently happy.

2. Alyssa outsmarted her parents, fled to Florida, changed her wardrobe and she's not under Bitch Kelly's control anymore (see Kelly's attempt on controlling Zach and Whitney's weekend activities. Or more like, limit them to Bible studies.) Alyssa only showed herself for a brief ten minutes for the cameras, and keeps most of her private life to herself. She doesn't rely on a jobless grifter and won't have to mooch off his teenage son for grocery money. She doesn't need to sell her privacy for cash. I like what she did with her life.

Then:

Dill: what the hell does Derick for a living? They would have had the chance to travel the world together and have an exciting life. No, screw dat, let's get knocked up, live off of TLC's money and live in Jimbo's property, completely under his control. Good job.

jessa: she married a teen who "works for his dad", so they are completely at jimbo's mercy. She is a newlywed and all she worries about is telling off tens? hundreds? of millions of people, using harsh and condemning words and destines them for eternal damnation. Not exactly a pretty sight. I'm appalled by her but at the same time I'm grateful that she discontinues to play it sweet and lets the whole world see the duggar values for what they really are. I'm not entirely convinced that she's overjoyed with her life.

As to Michael Bates' pal: he doesn't come off neither mellow, or romantic or too interested in her girlfriend. Michael, on the other hand, seems desperate.

Zach and Whitney would be totally happy and jolly with their lives if Kelly wouldn't try to shit all over ther happiness all the time and wouldn't try to express her disapproval of Whitney with her "suggestions" regarding even their free time.

PS I wonder if Derick and Jill have ever had a deep convo about Derick's past relationships because I doubt that he's been a virgin for 27 years holding out for a fundie virgin.

THIS !!! I know that he is really religious and was a missionary and everything but was he really a virgin ? I mean he went to college and had a pretty normal life before he met Jill..

And, this is not really the subject here, but did Jim bod and Michelle "saved" themselves for marriage ?

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IIRC, JB and M saved sex for marriage but did kiss before.

However, they were also married at 18.

It's not too terribly uncommon to still be a virgin at 18, especially among religious populations. I went to a Catholic school that was very liberal, and I would say that about half or so of my class were still virgins when we graduated. Sleeping around was really frowned upon (and at that school, EVERYONE knew EVERYTHING), so unless you had a serious relationship, you probably didn't lose it.

tl;dr: Being a virgin when you marry at 18 is far less remarkable than being a virgin when you marry at 27.

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Then:

Dill: what the hell does Derick for a living? They would have had the chance to travel the world together and have an exciting life. No, screw dat, let's get knocked up, live off of TLC's money and live in Jimbo's property, completely under his control. Good job.

Derick is a corporate accountant for Walmart, btw.

So right now, supporting his family shouldn't be TOO big a deal (especially considering they are getting cheap/free housing from Jim Bob). Hopefully, any TLC money they are getting is going straight into a savings account and/or being intelligently invested so it can be used later when they do need it.

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Chad comes from a family of medical doctors- Does anybody know what he does for a living?

I guess, I'd have to say

Chad

John

Derick

Ben

I"m not sure about Brandon yet...

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IMHO, In order of desirability

John

Chad

Derrick

Ben

Brandon

It's possible I could change my mind, but so far, Brandon gives me a *major* case of the creeps. Michael too, so I guess they're well-suited to each other :(

That's my order too! Except I might give Brandon a slight edge only because I think Ben is SUCH a doofus. Brandon does have a creepy factor and he's choosing a religiousy career... and I'm annoyed by HOW coo-coo Micheal(l)(a) is when she talk about him. And yet I STILL give him an edge over Ben if that tells you how "highly" I think of Ben. :lol:

On a side note, we've now seen two episodes with Tori *touching* Brandon. In any other family I wouldn't think that was a big deal, but... well anyway... can you imagine if Joy were seen dragging Derrick around (well, I guess she did touch Ben's hair, but it had a different vibe). Michelle would poop her pants!

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On a side note, we've now seen two episodes with Tori *touching* Brandon. In any other family I wouldn't think that was a big deal, but... well anyway... can you imagine if Joy were seen dragging Derrick around (well, I guess she did touch Ben's hair, but it had a different vibe). Michelle would poop her pants!

And we'd probably get to see it on the show.

I'm pretty unimpressed with Derick and Ben. Neither one strikes me as much of a "Prince Charming". Just two guys who I expect ask how high when Jim Bob or TLC says jump.

Chad seems great, I like John, and just don't know about Brandon.

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The bates girls are more fun, much prettier as a group than the Duggars (except for maybe Joy, who is a stunner), have much more personality and poise on camera, seem comfortable spouting their opinions, seem loving with one another, but you can also imagine them getting into some pretty heated, but normal sibling fights, and seem to have a better work ethic.

The older ones are going to school, working part time and doing a lot of the work at home.

The married girls seem to have done well with spouses. Not sure about John, but certainly Chad is sweetie.

Michael is a bit over the top about her feelings for Brandon, almost to the point of feeling second hand embarrassment for her. Brandon seems nice enough and I thought he did well doing the craft with the little kids. Does he come from a big family?

The Duggar girls seem developmentally stunted, and often awkward on camera, even though they have much more experience with it that the Bateses' . They rarely express an original thought and they don't honestly seem all that close to one another.

Derick seems like a decent spouse choice for Jill. But, as has been said a million times before, Ben and Jessa are a trainwreck waiting to happen.

I saw if it were a contest, the Bates Family is winning.

I have to hand it to them, they are managing this second foray into reality tv quite well. The few staunch fundies that they might lose because of married daughters wearing pants, is minor compared to the number of new fans that will find them interesting.

WIth the Duggar girls it feels like the spark of life is snuffed out and with the Bates girls the spark of life is very evident.

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I think the Bates girls just come off as happier in general and comfortable in their own skin. They seem to have a spark to them. Other than Johannah, the Duggar girls always seem to be on edge as though afraid of making a mistake. I have yet to see one of the older ones appear happy, other than on their wedding days.

Also, I get the feeling that, if they were not related, the majority of the Bates girls (other than Alyssa) could be friends under different circumstances. They seem to actually like each other and have a connection. Other than Jessa and Jinger, I could not see any of the Duggar sisters spending time with each other. To me, it's as though the Duggars were, on one hand raised as a single group but, at the same time, raised not to be super close to each other.

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I worry about Brandon more, though, because he seems drunk on the Kool-Aid (working in Gothard's headquarters) and that whole incident where he kind of shamed Michael for "lying" to surprise him with a visit stands out as controlling. Hopefully, that's a one-off, and he's really just a nice, brainwashed man.

I felt the same way about this scene, it WAS kind of weird.

HOWEVER, I'm willing to give Brandon the benefit of doubt considering that he has not been on camera much. So MAYBE his weird behaviour was caused by the situation being filmed PLUS the surprise. Or maybe noone surprises him, ever, and he didn't know how to react. We'll have to wait and see.

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It's not too terribly uncommon to still be a virgin at 18, especially among religious populations. I went to a Catholic school that was very liberal, and I would say that about half or so of my class were still virgins when we graduated. Sleeping around was really frowned upon (and at that school, EVERYONE knew EVERYTHING), so unless you had a serious relationship, you probably didn't lose it.

.

This reminds me of my senior year at my Catholic high school. Senior girls, in the library, deaf Sister dozing at the desk, and we're talking about...... sex. The "are you a virgin?" question was going around.. I was not, at just 17.5, but I was astonished to learn that most of my classmates weren't, either! (It WAS the 70s, Free love and all that) I began to understand that sex was the normal human condition.. till then I thought I was such a great sinner! (Well, I probably was that, too, LOL!)

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Derrick might have still been a virgin, but not a lip virgin.

:romance-kisslips::romance-kisslips::romance-kisslips:

I spewed water out of my nose when Jill said that Derick's a good kisser and it's because he plays the tuba. O. MY. GOD! Amy probably gives good blowjobs because she likes to eat corndogs.

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I personally don't think Joy is pretty or funny at all - she is always scowling - I don't like that

let's see the men

Ben - duh :D

Chad Paine - he must be a gift from God to erin - seriously that man must be amazing

John Webster he is ok -

Brandon and Derick gad no :D

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I think that John Webster and Alyssa are a cute young couple.

I don't think that Erin Bates is married to a man that she was in love with when she walked towards the aisle but he seams to be a good husband as he cares for her and treating her right.

About the Duggar grooms:

I don't have good feelings about neither of those two. Derrick does seam nice and he and Jill really seam to be in love but I don't have good feelings about this relationship nonetheless.

Jessa and Ben never seamed to be in love to me. I assume that their relationship is all about looks. I also have some other supicions about Ben which I don't want to get into now because I don't have enough proof for them.

In the end I let my intuition decide and say that the Bates girls win this round.

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I personally don't think Joy is pretty or funny at all - she is always scowling - I don't like that

Would you blame her? She was a jolly happy tomboyish girl who enjoyed playing with her male siblings. She was an energetic, sporty ball of fun until her first egg had ruptured. Then he was taken to those awkward daddy-dinners with a purity ring on her finger and lectured on how the good times for her was over. For good. And that he had to start acting like a lady. That is when they have started growing apart with Josiah - they could have probably fled a couple years later. Of course she is always scowling. What should she be happy about? Now that 2 of her sisters - one janitor and one babysitter - are gone, she's probably become Workhorse nr. 3 after Jana and Jinger.

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The Bates family did better when it comes to picking partners. I think it is because their parents respected and trusted them more when they were courting, and let them make their own rules. Sure, I cant imagine them being happy if the next kid to court says "Im going to have sex before marriage" or "We wont have P in V sex, but we are going to do everything else", but Zach and Whitney kissing wasn't the end of the world, and they all have been allowed to choose, like when they decide to hug.

Also I just really dislike Ben. And I am not too impressed at Derick over the cat incident.

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