Lori and Ken Alexander's Big Ol' Bucket o' Crazy - Part 2

[FundieWatcher]

"Ryan is in dental school full-time, Cassi is working part-time to support them, and there is no way that she can have a baby and quit her job now without taking on some major debt or getting some serious parental help. "

Didn't he get almost through Pharmacy school before changing to Dentistry? They have to have some major college debt.

[jerkit]

"Ryan is in dental school full-time, Cassi is working part-time to support them, and there is no way that she can have a baby and quit her job now without taking on some major debt or getting some serious parental help. "

Didn't he get almost through Pharmacy school before changing to Dentistry? They have to have some major college debt.

Yes. He only had one year of pharmacy school left.

[polecat]

Oh, she's quite the hypocrite, but I'd leave the married children out of the discussion. They have acknowledged that the oldest has fertility issues, and it's possible that the youngest two have (grasp!) made some independent decisions without seeking mommy's input.

I actually wonder if certain posts are intended as passive-aggressive digs at family members, like the whole "ducks in a row" thing. Ryan is in dental school full-time, Cassi is working part-time to support them, and there is no way that she can have a baby and quit her job now without taking on some major debt or getting some serious parental help. I haven't seen any evidence that Ken is on board with Lori's baby-mania.

Family politics aside, my main issue with the post is that I hate how words like "selfish" get twisted around to mean "any consideration of my own needs and limitations at all". Yes, having and raising children involves some short term sacrifice for longer term gain. It's not really selfish, though, to consider my needs and abilities in thinking about having more kids, because I'm not taking anything away from someone else by doing so. My kids and my husband need me to be functional. I knew that I could do that, with some effort, with my first 3 kids. I also had a very strong feeling after a rough c-section that having a 4th would not be easy, and that I had basically reached my limit and couldn't handle a 4th c-section birth and baby without compromising my care of my existing family. How is that selfish? I owe something to my existing children, I would owe something to a future child if I had one, but I owe nothing to any egg or sperm cells.

You make some excellent points. Ken and Lori both have weighed in that they believe parents should help kids financially -- This would be one really good way to keep their foot in their kids' doors re: control. (My dad pulls this same crap on my sister, who is financially dependent on him). And if any money is being given to those kids by good ole mom and dad, then Lori is going to feel well within her rights to tell them how to live (right or wrong).

[2xx1xy1JD]

You make some excellent points. Ken and Lori both have weighed in that they believe parents should help kids financially -- This would be one really good way to keep their foot in their kids' doors re: control. (My dad pulls this same crap on my sister, who is financially dependent on him). And if any money is being given to those kids by good ole mom and dad, then Lori is going to feel well within her rights to tell them how to live (right or wrong).

Was Ken as supportive of the idea of financially helping adult offspring? In general, Lori always seems pretty quick to spend other people's money or tell other people how to cut back. In reality, Ken complains that she is spoiled and has no concept of wise spending, and he seems to care a lot more about keeping his money. He was the one who objected to Cassi spending $20,000 in tuition per semester for housewife education (lorialexander.blogspot.ca/2014/02/do-christian-colleges-prepare-women-for.html). The rant on tithing sounded like it came from him.

Lori's fond of saying that women need to stay at home with their kids AND that couples shouldn't put off getting married and having kids. When asked directly, though, she has nothing to say about how someone married to a student in a long professional program can make it work.

[polecat]

Next thing you know, she'll be telling women to get their husbands to build high brick walls around their homes. Then she'll advise them to wear burqas and never go outside without a male escort. :?

I can't even explain the visual image that I got of Lori with a male escort. :lol:

Suffice it to say, I need to get my brain out of the gutter. :pink-shock:

[Firiel]

Was Ken as supportive of the idea of financially helping adult offspring? In general, Lori always seems pretty quick to spend other people's money or tell other people how to cut back. In reality, Ken complains that she is spoiled and has no concept of wise spending, and he seems to care a lot more about keeping his money. He was the one who objected to Cassi spending $20,000 in tuition per semester for housewife education (lorialexander.blogspot.ca/2014/02/do-christian-colleges-prepare-women-for.html). The rant on tithing sounded like it came from him.

Lori's fond of saying that women need to stay at home with their kids AND that couples shouldn't put off getting married and having kids. When asked directly, though, she has nothing to say about how someone married to a student in a long professional program can make it work.

Although it's more than possible that the ideas against tithing came from Ken, that post was WAY too short and had WAY to many paragraph breaks to actually be written by Ken.

[jerkit]

And of course there are all these smug commenters bragging about how their cars don't start because it's been so long since they drove it.

You don't go to the grocery store? Take your kids to the library? The park? NO activities outside the home? *eye roll*

[salex]

Was Ken as supportive of the idea of financially helping adult offspring? In general, Lori always seems pretty quick to spend other people's money or tell other people how to cut back. In reality, Ken complains that she is spoiled and has no concept of wise spending, and he seems to care a lot more about keeping his money. He was the one who objected to Cassi spending $20,000 in tuition per semester for housewife education (lorialexander.blogspot.ca/2014/02/do-christian-colleges-prepare-women-for.html). The rant on tithing sounded like it came from him.

Lori's fond of saying that women need to stay at home with their kids AND that couples shouldn't put off getting married and having kids. When asked directly, though, she has nothing to say about how someone married to a student in a long professional program can make it work.

I always thought that was more lori than ken. But, Ken did put his son in law on the payroll when construction was down. (Didn't someone say son in law left Ken's employee?)

[polecat]

And of course there are all these smug commenters bragging about how their cars don't start because it's been so long since they drove it.

You don't go to the grocery store? Take your kids to the library? The park? NO activities outside the home? *eye roll*

Are you saying that THIS liberal hippy feminist woman is godlier than all these sniveling church-going housewives? Because for a good decade, we only HAD one vehicle! I lived within walking distance of the park, the library, the grocery, heck even city hall was right across the street from my house ... pretty much anywhere I needed to go, I could walk to. And since I worked from home, I didn't see the need for a car. So I didn't have one. And yet here we have godly mentor Lori and her team of flying monkeys who ALL have cars?!

I'm suddenly feeling godlier-than-thou.

[Firiel]

And of course there are all these smug commenters bragging about how their cars don't start because it's been so long since they drove it.

You don't go to the grocery store? Take your kids to the library? The park? NO activities outside the home? *eye roll*

Utterly bizarre. The family I nannied for lived in a pretty good place for walking. We could walk to the park or the grocery store pretty easily. Even then, we drove places 3-4 times a week, all for Lori-approved, nurturing activities like the zoo or the library or whatever.

[jerkit]

Utterly bizarre. The family I nannied for lived in a pretty good place for walking. We could walk to the park or the grocery store pretty easily. Even then, we drove places 3-4 times a week, all for Lori-approved, nurturing activities like the zoo or the library or whatever.

All of her leghumpers come across SO holier-than-thou, trying to outdo each other with their submission, poverty, and now, how little they leave their own home.

[feministxtian]

Guess ol' Lori would shit her pants to find out that I drove all by myself from PHX to LV...that I drove to the speedway and then raced ON the speedway and then drove home by myself.

I rarely go to "Lori approved" places...no kids left at home. So, according to her I suppose I'm supposed to stay home all day every day unless my "headship" takes me to "Lori approved" places like the grocery store...

Fuck that bitch

[Firiel]

All of her leghumpers come across SO holier-than-thou, trying to outdo each other with their submission, poverty, and now, how little they leave their own home.

I would literally rather die than be in a Lori-approved relationship.

[GeoBQn]

And of course there are all these smug commenters bragging about how their cars don't start because it's been so long since they drove it.

You don't go to the grocery store? Take your kids to the library? The park? NO activities outside the home? *eye roll*

Didn't Lori once have a post encouraging people to grow their own food?

[feministxtian]

My car is sitting today because I drove my kids all over freakin' Clark County yesterday. I'm TIRED. Tomorrow we have to head to Henderson for my son to go to an ITT tech open house. He qualifies for a scholarship and pell grants...

BUT...come 3/2, my happy ass will be jumping in the car every damn morning again. Even when my current car wasn't my DD, it got started daily anyway to keep the oil from getting sludgy. Its not good to let a car sit until the battery dies. Its VERY bad...the oil gets sludgy, the gas can get gunky...even folks I know who store their show cars all winter start them every few days. But these people don't drive high performance cars...and if Lori's worshippers are to be believed, they all drive POS minivans that are on their last legs anyway.

She's about a stupid bitch...do as I say not as I do...stupid bitch.

[polecat]

Didn't Lori once have a post encouraging people to grow their own food?

Oh, hey, I do that, too! I bet Lori doesn't.

There is literally NOTHING better than a salad picked 10 minutes before, lettuces and spinach sun-warmed, onions fresh and earthy, and peppers sweet and juicy. Truly, a fresh-picked salad is unlike anything else.

[KittenMitten]

Oh, hey, I do that, too! I bet Lori doesn't.

There is literally NOTHING better than a salad picked 10 minutes before, lettuces and spinach sun-warmed, onions fresh and earthy, and peppers sweet and juicy. Truly, a fresh-picked salad is unlike anything else.

Oh, yum. Thank you for reminding this atheist about summer gardens. I can't wait until fresh lettuce and spinach, tomatoes and cucumbers. You made my day.

[lilwriter85]

I always thought that was more lori than ken. But, Ken did put his son in law on the payroll when construction was down. (Didn't someone say son in law left Ken's employee?)

Yup, the son-in-law was working for Ken for awhile. I wouldn't be surprised if there was drama there. Family or in-laws working in a family business always brings some kind of big or small drama.

[lilwriter85]

All of her leghumpers come across SO holier-than-thou, trying to outdo each other with their submission, poverty, and now, how little they leave their own home.

I agree. I was annoyed by this comment and how she seems to be glad her van broke down. It is possible money is the reason the van can't be fixed and there is nothing with trying to make it with one car, when you don't have the means to fix a second car or get another one. But just the tone of comment was done to get praise from Lori.

mvstephenson · 22 hours ago

My van broke and all the car seats don't fit in my husband's car so we've been home a LOT more! It's actually really nice! I usually don't run around a lot but forcing myself to stay home all the time is encouraging me to get things done at home. Your blog is such an encouragement to me Lori. I appreciate all your words so much! Thank you for all the time and energy you put into this blog and into guiding us! HUG!

Lori has trashed two car households before. She did a blog posting, where she said that women having their own cars gave them more freedom to be away from their homes more. For some people, two cars are real necessity for a household. In some rural areas, many people budget well to have 2 or 3 cars because they don't live close to stores, workplaces, schools, hospitals, and clinics. But many SAHMs with cars aren't always out on the road doing things. One of my friends was a SAHM when her sons were toddlers and she sometimes only left the house once or twice a week. Her husband wanted her to have a car and insisted on it because of possible emergencies or conflicts with his work schedule. I guess if men made sure that their wives had their own cars or encouraged them to leave the home to do things, Lori would be fine with it right?

[Hisey]

For those who asked about Ken and financially supporting adult kids. . .

Ken's new business website is called "Alexander and Sons." There's a pic of him and his two sons, including the one who is an orthodontist in NY. There's no sign of the son-in-law who was formerly a construction worker. I wonder if orthodontists read his bio and were disinclined to hire him, because he clearly had no background in orthondontics (he seems like a nice guy, not trashing him). Anyway, he's gone.

There's another interesting thing about that website. Ken's son Steven just graduated from orthodontist school last summer. Yet he is described as an "owner" of a practice in New York. If you go to the practice website, there is no mention of Steven, except for an occasional picture or two on the practice website. Also, the name "Alexander" is added to the practice name. But nearly everything on the website is about Dr. Bartlett, the original owner.

It also seems Dr. Bartlett and Ken are old friends. He is the first testimonial on Ken's website,saying Ken is great. And "Ken A. from Carlsbad, CA" gives Dr. Bartlett two positive reviews on Yelp.

On Ken's website, there is an article about young orthodontists buying the practices of older ones. They recommend the young orthodontist work with the older one for a few years as part of the transition. I imagine that either Ken purchased Steven's share of the practice, or made the downpayment, or perhaps Steven is doing it entirely on is own by working for his share. I'm not sure how these things work.

There's a few interesting things in that article (I"m not including links because I'm not sure if it's OK). It suggests that you don't want to buy a practice in an area that is too "poor", because, of course, you won't make enough money. It also says taht young orthodontists may have to start out in a place that is "cold" (or has other undesirable features) but can always sell out after a while to move to a more desirable location.

Anyway the thing that struck me was the description of young Steven as an "owner" of a practice that he has only worked at for a few months and that he probably has contributed very little equity.

Edited to clarify

[salex]

Thanks, Hisey. I feel deep pity for the new wife/attorney/daughter in law.

I can say from bitter experience "Don't get involved in family businesses" (And we had serious contractual agreements, outside owners and non family partners--- and I still stand by this statement. And ours worked/works better than many)

[salex]

I think I've discovered part of was bugging Ken when he wrote his diatribe on working women and how they should not be taking work from men....

ortho2.com/Resources/Consultants/Default.aspx

based on this, Ken's career is becoming overrun with evil working women aka feminists!

[lilwriter85]

For those who asked about Ken and financially supporting adult kids. . .

Ken's new business website is called "Alexander and Sons." There's a pic of him and his two sons, including the one who is an orthodontist in NY. There's no sign of the son-in-law who was formerly a construction worker. I wonder if orthodontists read his bio and were disinclined to hire him, because he clearly had no background in orthondontics (he seems like a nice guy, not trashing him). Anyway, he's gone.

There's another interesting thing about that website. Ken's son Steven just graduated from orthodontist school last summer. Yet he is described as an "owner" of a practice in New York. If you go to the practice website, there is no mention of Steven, except for an occasional picture or two on the practice website. Also, the name "Alexander" is added to the practice name. But nearly everything on the website is about Dr. Bartlett, the original owner.

It also seems Dr. Bartlett and Ken are old friends. He is the first testimonial on Ken's website,saying Ken is great. And "Ken A. from Carlsbad, CA" gives Dr. Bartlett two positive reviews on Yelp.

On Ken's website, there is an article about young orthodontists buying the practices of older ones. They recommend the young orthodontist work with the older one for a few years as part of the transition. I imagine that either Ken purchased Steven's share of the practice, or made the downpayment, or perhaps Steven is doing it entirely on is own by working for his share. I'm not sure how these things work.

There's a few interesting things in that article (I"m not including links because I'm not sure if it's OK). It suggests that you don't want to buy a practice in an area that is too "poor", because, of course, you won't make enough money. It also says taht young orthodontists may have to start out in a place that is "cold" (or has other undesirable features) but can always sell out after a while to move to a more desirable location.

Anyway the thing that struck me was the description of young Steven as an "owner" of a practice that he has only worked at for a few months and that he probably has contributed very little equity.

Edited to clarify

I just found the site which is linked on one of the sites has been linked here in the past.

I also saw the things about Steven. It is pretty common, for physicians, dentists, and orthodontists to do those things when they are starting out. I have a family friend who is a dentist and is planning to retire in a few years. He has a younger dentist working at his practice and she is planning to takeover. The part about orthodontists starting out in "cold" places is another common move with people in healthcare and dental. I wouldn't be surprised if Ken bought a share of that practice for Steven and there is nothing with parents helping out adult children, when they are starting out.

[lilwriter85]

I think I've discovered part of was bugging Ken when he wrote his diatribe on working women and how they should not be taking work from men....

ortho2.com/Resources/Consultants/Default.aspx

based on this, Ken's career is becoming overrun with evil working women aka feminists!

I'm looking at that now and bingo that is why Ken is pissed. Most of the people listed on that page are women and they are Ken and Ryan's competition. I wouldn't be surprised at all if Ryan has the same hateful attitude that Lori and Ken have towards working women.

[jerkit]

Lori is super pissed that people disagreed with her about tithing. Her new post is all "I won't be publishing dissenting opinions" and theological snobbism. *eye roll*