Is Josiah quietly swept under the rug?

[Coco]

The thing that bothers me about this is that when Joseph went to ALERT, Michelle was all like, oh its so great to have him back home with us and under our roof. He was only gone 6 weeks! I don't see the same with Josiah. And too, maybe he likes being there because he doesn't have to deal with the insanity of the Duggar home. Maybe he's one of those kids that likes schedules and order, more than Michelle and JB seem to offer.

ita - Maybe he just is too sincere of a person to take the TlC fakery any more. Working at ALERT is a legitimate job, and he might like the stability of a schedule he can count on.

[Four is Enough]

I've been ruminating about this.. someone else hit on it... Perhaps Josiah, and to a lesser extent, Jana, have realized that they CAN get away from the Duggar craziness, JUST BY volunteering to remain at ALERT.. or JTTH... for Jana, it's been a reprieve, for Siah, it's been close to a college year away from home! If that's why they're doing it, good for them! They've figured out how to work the system for themselves! Maybe Jana can let Joy know... there's a little fresh air for you, hon!

[OneFifthQuiverFull]

Singling out kids (who may not even fully have a grasp of their sexuality yet) and speculating can be pretty harmful. It's such a sensitive topic for developing adolescents, and they should be able to define their sexuality on their terms alone, 100%. It's never anyone else's place to try to define it for them.

It can be traumatic for people to openly speculate about your sexuality. I mean, who knows if any Duggar child is gay or straight - only him or her! but I'm sure that some kids already suffers enough for not being as "masculine" (in the fundie sense) as their brothers even without people guessing whether or not he is gay. He's no John David, thank God.

It's also just not good in general to correlate where you fall on a gender spectrum with your sexuality...just further enforces stereotypes, and the last thing the Duggars need is more stereotyped views of gender.

I can't speak for everyone obviously, but I really want the best for the Duggar kids and it makes me kind of sad to think that they could suffer on any level from snark that starts on sites like FJ. They already have enough shame and guilt about their bodies and sexuality without anyone else's help :(

Edited to modify speculation of sexuality of specific child. Lilith

I agree 100% with this. I have 3 teenage boys (18, 18, and 16) and we are very pro-equality and gay rights and they know we would have absolutely no problem whatsoever if one of them is gay. Despite being raised in that environment (one my husband/their dad also feels the same about), the biggest insult they can hurl at one another is the f-word or "gay". Clearly it is a very sensitive topic to that age group - gay or straight - if they use it as a weapon. If I hear it I go absolutely ape shit on them because *I* find it insulting and rude, but they are teen boy animals and they are going to have their moments of being uncivilized, no matter how much Mom yells.

Sexuality in ALL ways is a highly charged topic for teenagers, but especially boys, I now know as I am knee deep in them. Our sexuality as parents, their sister's, their own, etc. are all potential minefields because as a topic it hits a very live nerve. And we are normal, healthy and worldly. I can only imagine how, in the world the Duggarlings grow up in, it would be 100 times worse. To google yourself and find a board full of strangers speculating on your sexuality could be truly devastating. And though they are "adults", the limits to their ability to truly grow and stretch has been stunted, so they still have the mentality of a teenager in some ways (see also Jill and Jessa).

[HarleyQuinn]

I just don't see someone like Josiah (from what we've seen of him anyways) WANTING to go to ALERT voluntarily. Especially since he expressed interest in taking college classes in his graduation episode. It doesn't seem like his intentions were to stay at ALERT that long.

Plus Boob gave Smugger/JD/Joseph jobs when they turned 18, why not Josiah? Because he doesn't like him? Does anyone in the family like this poor kid? He seems so sweet.

[Ralar]

I wish Josiah had been around more during Dill's courtship and newlywed days. I think Josiah and Derick would have developed a nice relationship. I also think Derick would be a good role model for Josiah. Derick is not a manly-man brute, but he's not a sissy either. He seems like a well-educated, nice guy and a conservative Christian (who may well be on his way to drinking too much kool-aid).

[trplaxle]

I wish someone could actually get a message to Josiah, tell him about all the support he would have if he broke away.

Has anyone ever seen Big Brother? We could steal their idea and rent a banner plane and have it fly over the Duggar compound......call us, we'll provide support if you want to break free! lol

[happy atheist]

!

{TEXT1}:

Do NOT speculate about the sexuality of unmarried adults still living at home. I don't think I can make it clearer than that. Even though, on this very page, there is an official announcement about this rule, I just removed several posts that broke it. It doesn't matter if you think you're being supportive, or speaking in generalities. It doesn't matter if you think you're being cute or joking about it. Don't do it. If it happens again, this thread will be closed.

[Ralar]

Has anyone ever seen Big Brother? We could steal their idea and rent a banner plane and have it fly over the Duggar compound......call us, we'll provide support if you want to break free! lol

That would just result in all the "kids" having their cell phones confiscated.

[Free Them All]

I've been ruminating about this.. someone else hit on it... Perhaps Josiah, and to a lesser extent, Jana, have realized that they CAN get away from the Duggar craziness, JUST BY volunteering to remain at ALERT.. or JTTH... for Jana, it's been a reprieve, for Siah, it's been close to a college year away from home! If that's why they're doing it, good for them! They've figured out how to work the system for themselves! Maybe Jana can let Joy know... there's a little fresh air for you, hon!

OH --- I wouldn't call Gothard's Alert Academy or JTTH fresh air!

[trplaxle]

That would just result in all the "kids" having their cell phones confiscated.

You're right. I'm shocked they're allowed to have them in the first place. I'm sure there are Internet restrictions and whatnot, but Holy hell, what if they call or text someone in a nongroup conversation!?

[fabkiwi06]

I think there are some apps that can monitor multiple phone/text accounts at once. I saw that Kim had something like that for monitoring her kids iChats and Facetimes on "Don't Be Tardy". I'm sure JBoob has them on all the phones.

[Four is Enough]

OH --- I wouldn't call Gothard's Alert Academy or JTTH fresh air!

There, they might be able to "blend in" a little more, and not be singled out for cameras and talking heads.. they must feel at the TTH that they are constantly "on"..

[RosyDaisy]

The only time I mention anyone's sexuality is my future SIL and her partner, and it's in a positive manner, because I love both of them. They are out of the closet and not fundie. Is it ok for me to mention them like I have been doing, or is that against the rules as well?

I admit I said a few things about David Waller, but not in a gay-bashing way. I won't do that anymore. Honestly thought someone's sexual orientation is really none of my business. I support the LGBT, and believe they are entitled the same right as heterosexuals.

[Callipygian]

I wish Josiah had been around more during Dill's courtship and newlywed days. I think Josiah and Derick would have developed a nice relationship. I also think Derick would be a good role model for Josiah... He seems like a well-educated, nice guy and a conservative Christian (who may well be on his way to drinking too much kool-aid).

Haven't we heard that 'Siah wants to be an accountant? Derrick is the perfect person to teach him the ins and outs if Josiah actually gets/wants to work towards that goal. If that's his passion, I think Derrick will help him nurture it when (if?!) he comes back from ALERT, and if Derrick isn't too swamped with his work and home life.

[calimojo]

Did Josiah attend Jill's wedding? I think I asked this before, but now I can't find which thread that was on.

[Antimony]

I was kind of hoping ALERT might not be so bad and that he could genuinely enjoy it but then I ran through the home schoolers anonymous info on ALERT and lost all hope. Then again, maybe if he survived being the lowest on the totem pole, he now has some sort of leadership position and enjoys having that control? Or being looked up to? Some messed up psychological bonding can happen after shared trama.

I don't know if he was forced or not to go but it still doesn't seem like standard fare for a duggar son -- which is to say, Jim boob hasn't handed him a small blue collar business yet. Or a plane. (What is Joseph doing, anyway?)

[Coco]

Is it really that bad for everyone? My parents had some friends who were leaders/instructors in Big Sandy for years. If it was awful i'm wondering if guys would even go. Not every fundie parent is as sadistic as the ones we snark on. If ALERT was really traumatic those more moderate parents wouldn't send their kids. (Also, having known respectable, sane people who were part of the group is why it took me so long to see that IBLP was a cult).

i'm just holding onto hope that Josiah is happy there. He seems like such a great kid, so outgoing and honest. It would be horrible if he was suffering. And think about it, we only get to see on 19 Kids what the producers want the audience to see. If they wanted to edit a person almost into invisibility, they could, no matter what the family felt or said in actual life. That tiny blip at the Mother's Day party where Josiah is video chatting with Michelle on her phone- that might have been a bigger deal to the family IRL. i guess the truth is in the Duggar-controlled media like instagrams and fb accounts. Not that Jessa and Jill choose to talk much about their siblings' lives. :roll:

[BrownieMomma]

Haven't we heard that 'Siah wants to be an accountant? Derrick is the perfect person to teach him the ins and outs if Josiah actually gets/wants to work towards that goal. If that's his passion, I think Derrick will help him nurture it when (if?!) he comes back from ALERT, and if Derrick isn't too swamped with his work and home life.

Oh my. I'm an accountant and I got a little woozy when you said the word "passion" in relationship to "accounting."

It would interesting to meet someone who has a genuine passion for it.

[anjulibai]

Is it really that bad for everyone? My parents had some friends who were leaders/instructors in Big Sandy for years. If it was awful i'm wondering if guys would even go. Not every fundie parent is as sadistic as the ones we snark on. If ALERT was really traumatic those more moderate parents wouldn't send their kids. (Also, having known respectable, sane people who were part of the group is why it took me so long to see that IBLP was a cult).

i'm just holding onto hope that Josiah is happy there. He seems like such a great kid, so outgoing and honest. It would be horrible if he was suffering. And think about it, we only get to see on 19 Kids what the producers want the audience to see. If theyb wanted to edit a person almost into invisibility, they could, no matter what the family felt or said in actual life. That tiny blip at the Mother's Day party where Josiah is video chatting with Michelle on her phone- that might have been a bigger deal to the family IRL. i guess the truth is in the Duggar-controlled media like instagrams and fb accounts. Not that Jessa and Jill choose to talk much about their siblings' lives. :roll:

It's probably a lot of fun for guys that are into that sort of stuff.

But Josiah has never seemed like he was into that sort of stuff.

There was talk for a while about him becoming an accountant. I think they mentioned finding him some sort of apprenticeship.

That Josiah is doing Alert, that costs money, instead of pursuing being an accountant, that would make money, says an awful lot considering Jim Bob is all money.

[HarleyQuinn]

Did Josiah attend Jill's wedding? I think I asked this before, but now I can't find which thread that was on.

He was there, I think he was an usher. And we got a little glimpse of him in last week's episode. I'm kind of surprised they didn't film him coming home from ALERT since they filmed Joseph's graduation, but I guess this season is all about Jill.

[BrownieMomma]

Now that is really a waste. If Josiah truly has an interest in being an accountant, you can't apprentice for that. If he's going to be taken seriously by anyone who would hire him, either as an employee or to provide a service to a taxpayer or business owner, he needs at minimum a bachelor's degree in accounting.

Really he should become a CPA, but he could do okay without it. He needs that four year degree if he wants to be much more than a bookkeeper or small business tax preparer.

That money would be better invested in Josiah's brain at university than Josiah's heart at ALERT.

[JenniferJuniper]

My guess is the accountant thing was more Jim Bob's idea. On the show Josiah indicated two separate times that physical labor was not his thing. Michelle has said in one of her blog-things that Josiah is her most sensitive, artistic and poetic child. While accountants can be poetic and artistic, it doesn't seem to me that it would necessarily be Josiah's calling. Jim Bob, on the other hand, with his limited world view and (possibly) understanding that Josiah is brighter than his older brothers, maybe figured havin' him do the books for the family businesses would be a fair compromise.

Alert may be a placeholder for both Josiah and his parents while they figure out what comes next for him. Or it really could be a brainwashing camp where his parents hope they can both beef up his scrawny body and with his adherence to their peculiar brand of fundamentalism.

What would make me truly sad would be to see Josiah try to start to get on the lower rungs of local politics with an eye towards using the family name to move up. Let's face it, I'm sure his parents are happy to see how far Josh has come, but he's a total doofus hick who will never be a real political player. Josiah, on the other hand, is not a total doofus hick. Let's hope he fights back, even if it's just in his own mental attitude.

[HarleyQuinn]

I thought Josiah actually said himself that he wanted to be an accountant?

I would hate it if he got into conservative politics like Josh. He just doesn't seem the type. I honestly wonder if he believes everything his parents tell him? That could just be me hoping he's quietly rebelling. lol

[anjulibai]

I thought both Jim Bob and Josiah mentioned Josiah becoming an accountant, but it was Jim Bob who talked about an apprenticeship because they didn't want Josiah to go to college....

....which Josiah would need if he wanted to be more an a bookkeeper.

Because that's all I imagine he'd be able to get out of an apprenticeship, how to do bookkeeping. Which is a fine job, but not necessarily something that will make a ton of money in the long run. At least not to support a large family on.

I don't know anyone that is an accountant that has not gone to college, and definitely you need it if you want to be a CPA.

It could very well be that Alert is a placeholder until Jim Bob figures out how to get Josiah to be an accountant without going to college, but I really think that is unlikely given how much Alert costs.

The amount of time Josiah has spent there plus his lack of inclination and ability plus his stated interest in doing an office type job all add up to Josiah's stay at Alert have a decidedly malign purpose.

[Antimony]

Is it really that bad for everyone? My parents had some friends who were leaders/instructors in Big Sandy for years. If it was awful i'm wondering if guys would even go. Not every fundie parent is as sadistic as the ones we snark on. If ALERT was really traumatic those more moderate parents wouldn't send their kids. (Also, having known respectable, sane people who were part of the group is why it took me so long to see that IBLP was a cult).

i'm just holding onto hope that Josiah is happy there. He seems like such a great kid, so outgoing and honest. It would be horrible if he was suffering. And think about it, we only get to see on 19 Kids what the producers want the audience to see. If they wanted to edit a person almost into invisibility, they could, no matter what the family felt or said in actual life. That tiny blip at the Mother's Day party where Josiah is video chatting with Michelle on her phone- that might have been a bigger deal to the family IRL. i guess the truth is in the Duggar-controlled media like instagrams and fb accounts. Not that Jessa and Jill choose to talk much about their siblings' lives. :roll:

It might not be anymore but I can't imagine it's still butterflies and sunshine. Maybe if he's fundie those kind of horror stories don't happen cause every one there knows that he helps sell the ATI brand.

And even if it was terrible, lots of times kids don't want to tell their parents. If you think about how hard it can be to get bullied kids in public school to tell their parents, how hard would it be to tell ATI parents that something Gothard offees was hurting you? Espicially with addition of the idea of being punished. I mean, Michelle thinks God punished her for birth control with Caleb, eight (I think one of her old videos indicates that) -- if a supposedly godly person beats the crap out of Josiah he could very well try to comprehend it by thinking of it as a punishment for slacking on wisdom booklets or whatever the hell else.

It's probably mostly fun or at least not torture but the risk for abuse there and the documentation of it is way too high for any knowledgeable parent to send a child their (but I'm sure most don't know or are told it's lies or don't think it counts as abuse, etc.)