For Sarah and Jana

[Coco]

Nothing much to snark at, but i thought this was good considering they might feel left behind.

phyliciadelta.com/i-dont-want-to-lose-him/

(part of The Other Virgin Diaries series) phyliciadelta.com/the-other-virgin-diaries/

[Koala]

If either of them plan on raising their children in the manner in which they were raised, I hope they never marry or reproduce.

[dairyfreelife]

I feel for them being in the culture they are in and not able to do what they are told is the only thing women are to do. Damn, that sucks.

[Coco]

If either of them plan on raising their children in the manner in which they were raised, I hope they never marry or reproduce.

Maybe being passed over will make them angry enough to break out, marry a normal guy and raise a few kids with less religion and more tolerance, and their daughters with more options than they have.

Irrational optimist over here :lol:

I think Sarah's beyond hope though, honestly. It isn't her fault that her dad ruined her life, i feel so sorry for her.

[Justme]

Jana is only 24, I think she has time. I think she will marry. She may want to wait a few years to keep her quiver down. If she has her 1st at 28, she may have a "small" family of 10-12.

I have little hope for Sarah. Stevie has said he will do nothing to find spouses for his kids. I guess he expects them to fall out of the air onto his doorstep.

[BriarRose1122]

Oh I totally think Jana will find somebody.

She's sweet, kind, pretty - and she's only 24, she's got PLENTY of time to settle down.

And, maybe marrying a little later will be good in the long run, because she won't have quite as many children if she marries later...I think children are a blessing too but let's face it, life will be FAR easier if she doesn't have a whole football team's worth of kids to look after! I could see Jana being perfectly happy and living well with 3-4 kids.

I think Jana will find a great guy, and hopefully he will cherish her enough to put her feelings/health/well being above his desire to reproduce.

But as for poor Sarah....I think she *could* find a guy. But I don't think she ever actually *will* find a guy. And it isn't her fault, it's her father's fault.

Sarah seems like a good fundie catch, lol. But she will never get to experience the full fundie life she's spent her whole life preparing for, and she can blame her dear old dad for that.

Not even fundie boys are good enough in his eyes! Even the best fundie boy can't meet his qualifications, I mean the maxwells are the most extreme fundie family I've ever heard of. And I doubt steve lets anyone near her! I mean, a boy could be as Godly as the day is long..but if he mentions he thinks it's ok to eat, let's say, FOUR animal cookies, then he will be turned away by Steve for not being serious enough about his faith. Poor Sarah.

And I don't mean to sound like you must have children but...if she wants kids she can't wait too long, I mean we women do have a biological clock and Sarah doesn't have forever to have kids. If she doesn't *want* kids then that is totally fine and well, but if she is longing to be a wife and mother this just makes me incredibly sad for her!

The only thing that makes me feel better about her is that Joseph had a secret courtship, so it is possible that maybe Sarah is also having a secret courtship.

[bionicmlle]

I would hope that the recent nuptuals of both of their siblings might widen their social circle however for Sarah this is more unlikely. I could see that, for Jana, Jill and Derrick may be keeping an eye out for someone befitting the beautiful Jana. As for Sarah, perhaps her new SIL will introduce her to her own family before Elissa is completely emotionally quashed by the Maxwell machine.

[uber frau]

The only thing that makes me feel better about her is that Joseph had a secret courtship, so it is possible that maybe Sarah is also having a secret courtship.

Unless she's the world's best actress, I doubt it. It's pretty obvious from looking at pictures how unhappy she is. And I doubt she's the world's best actress-that would require imagination, and the ability to put herself into another person's place, and the ability to pretend. All of which are skills the Maxwell's pride themselves in lacking.

[nokidsmom]

At 32, Sarah's options in the world she lives in are pretty limited to nonexistent. She's been raised to believe that her only roles are wife and mother if she gets married and SAHD if she's not. Given that her father has done a mighty fine job of scaring off suitors because no one is good enough, it's a pretty safe bet that the latter is going to be the rest of her life.

However, if Sarah were not fundie, she would have plenty of options. 32 is not too old for getting married and starting a family in the real world. Unfortunately she's trapped not just by her dad but her thinking that she must obey her father and to go against the family grain, even has it has done her much harm, is just unthinkable. She's experiencing a disconnect I think, but she's never going to pin it down to her father's controlling ways, she's just going to think she has to pray harder and find some way to be grateful.

[Justme]

I wonder how often Stevie lay's the "guilt trip" on Sarah... "If you did xxx better.... if you prayed harder.... If you tried harder....." :evil-eye:

[nomoxian]

I wonder how often Stevie lay's the "guilt trip" on Sarah... "If you did xxx better.... if you prayed harder.... If you tried harder....." :evil-eye:

I think it would be easier - numerically; not emotionally - to think about when he *doesn't* do that. :cry:

[ButterscotchEquinox]

Maybe being passed over will make them angry enough to break out, marry a normal guy and raise a few kids with less religion and more tolerance, and their daughters with more options than they have.

Irrational optimist over here :lol:

I think Sarah's beyond hope though, honestly. It isn't her fault that her dad ruined her life, i feel so sorry for her.

Sign me up for Team Irrational Optimist! I'm imagining a better life for them. If only they were able to imagine it for themselves, think of what they might change.

[Feberin]

I just realized that Sarah is the same age as my BIL who is currently getting divorced. When my MIL found out they were divorcing she immediately started going on about him finding a nice Christian girl that wants lots of children since that woman never wanted children. :roll:

If only he wasn't way too worldly...