Urine in Your Eye: Biblical Scholar (dot net)

[salex]

So, her schtick is to use the Bible for ALL teaching, not just theology.

Does the Bible talk about putting pee in your eye? I think I'd remember that part!

How does she use the Bible to teach modern history?! Or does it just not matter?!

Also, KJV-only. This is common enough that you'd think I'd be used to hearing about it, but it just pisses me off every single time.

EDIT: AND she's a geocentrist. Awesome. Wonder if she's a flat-earther too?

I can't find if she is a flat earther....but

All of history is not equally important. Daniel, via Nebuchadnezzar's image, tells us which four world kingdoms to know-- Babylon, Medes-Persians, Greeks, and Romans. The last kingdom, the Roman empire, never died. The caesar/pontifex maximus is still sitting on his throne. He is still called pontifex maximus. He is the pope of Rome. For a more in-depth look at this, see the overviews for Daniel and Revelation on our Overiew of the Bible page.

[Freed]

It's obviously the CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE! A flat disc with corners and pillars holding it up as it says in teh bible.

Hey, if we replace 'pillars' with elephants and add a turtle...

[Gerialc]

WTH? What is it if it's not a planet?

This woman belongs to the church of JMSU, or, as we like to call it, Just Making Shit Up.

It's probably not a planet because the Bible doesn't refer to it as a planet. I remember learning that since the Bible always said "the sun, the moon, and the stars" that the sun wasn't a star, so maybe she's extrapolating something similar.

[Marianne]

Hey, if we replace 'pillars' with elephants and add a turtle...

Freed, I'm in love with your avatar. It's Jeremy Renner, right ?

[salex]

I in think zhe said planets meant wanders and since the earth doesn't move it isn't a wanderer thus isn't a planet.

[Freed]

Freed, I'm in love with your avatar. It's Jeremy Renner, right ?

Thank you, and yep! He's my "if I had to pick a dude." :wink-kitty:

[Cannelle]

This woman belongs to the church of JMSU, or, as we like to call it, Just Making Shit Up.

Right? Imma call bullshit on about half of the stories she tells, especially the one about how they studied Spanish for a month and then a native speaker told her her kid spoke better than the native speaker's daughter. Never happened. And also the "I don't play piano, but I successfully taught my daughter to play!" No. Just no.

I don't doubt that the daughter is intelligent, but I highly doubt she's madly gifted in every single way that CrazyCakes Mom claims she is.

I also call bullshit on the majority of the fan mail she's posted on there, especially the ones that are all, "I read your website, it's amazeballs, and today I sold my TV and bought a King James Bible!" Unless those were written by people just as crazy as she is, which is frightening.

[nelliebelle1197]

Right? Imma call bullshit on about half of the stories she tells, especially the one about how they studied Spanish for a month and then a native speaker told her her kid spoke better than the native speaker's daughter. Never happened. And also the "I don't play piano, but I successfully taught my daughter to play!" No. Just no.

I don't doubt that the daughter is intelligent, but I highly doubt she's madly gifted in every single way that CrazyCakes Mom claims she is.

I also call bullshit on the majority of the fan mail she's posted on there, especially the ones that are all, "I read your website, it's amazeballs, and today I sold my TV and bought a King James Bible!" Unless those were written by people just as crazy as she is, which is frightening.

Where are those mails? I cannot find!!

[shedemei]

Does the Bible talk about putting pee in your eye? I think I'd remember that part!

Matthew 7, KJPee edition:

3 And why beholdest thou the urine that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the pee that is in thine own eye?

4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me instill the urine into thine eye; and, behold, pee is in thine own eye?

5 Thou hypocrite, first instill the pee into thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to instill the urine into thy brother's eye.

[thoughtful]

Don't forget Steve Anderson's favorite, I Kings 14:10

Therefore, behold, I will bring evil upon the house of Jeroboam, and will cut off from Jeroboam him that pisseth against my eyeball, and him that is shut up and left in Israel, and will take away the remnant of the house of Jeroboam, as a man taketh away dung, till it be all gone.

Hmmm . . . I wonder what the Biblical Scholar lady does with dung . . .

[Firiel]

Matthew 7, KJPee edition:

3 And why beholdest thou the urine that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the pee that is in thine own eye?

4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me instill the urine into thine eye; and, behold, pee is in thine own eye?

5 Thou hypocrite, first instill the pee into thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to instill the urine into thy brother's eye.

:lol:

Oh my gosh, I am dying of laughter over here.

I want to share this and make it a Facebook status or something SO BAD, but no one would get it.

[thoughtful]

Matthew 5:29: And if thy right eye offend thee, put some whiz in it!

[Cannelle]

Where are those mails? I cannot find!!

Those are over on her other site, jesus-is-lord.com

[chaotic life]

This really icks me out. Ordinarily urine is sterile, but when you have an infection it doesn't. Not only that, it's not sterile unless you are getting it via catheter as the whole track to the outside has bacteria and yeast naturally.

Not only that but urine has high ammonia content, which has to be unhealthy to apply to your nose and eyes in this manner.

Then there's the smell factor. Never would a healthcare provider assume she's deliberately rubbing urine on herself. They will assume poor hygiene when they smell her.

Anyway, both the Geneva and Wycliffe translations beat the KJV both in timeline and as scholarly and accurate translations. Neither of those was a political stunt by a lousy monarch who was trying to silence dissent against him.

[kunoichi66]

Hey, if we replace 'pillars' with elephants and add a turtle...

Awww! I was going to say that!

[Mary C Doates]

Someone brought this to the inKlEINations! thread I created after someone sweetly introduced us to the home-edumacatin' by Bible-copyin', homely dress wearin' Kleins in a Maxwell post. It's like 1986, or a Maxwell conference - SYNERGY! baby.

I can only skim the walls of text. You have to read the mom's educational philosophy for yourself. But don't skip the In the Kitchen links and I am graciously providing you with the USES OF URINE link

biblicalscholarship.net/urine.htm

Have fun, boys and girls.

This website is a gift from the Snark Gods! Thanks for the tip!

[Full enough quiver]

My great great grandmother, great grandmother, and grandmother are into brujeria, and they actually recommend using urine to soften the skin and prevent wrinkles. Great great used to take my cloth diapers and put them on her face. Her skin actually is amazing, but I think I'd rather just be wrinkly. I don't think this lady would like having something in common with a bruja.

[artdecades]

I seriously cannot decipher most of her ramblings. Apparently, they read the Protocols of the Elders of Zion during 5th grade. I mean, what child shouldn't learn about ugly art and evil jews in fifth grade.

Year 5: Ezekiel: Prophet of the Captivity; Electing a President of the United States; Barak Obama & John McCain, "Whoever wins, we lose"; Civics; Hebrews; Matthew 24; The Workes (1616) by King James VI & I (summary and read online); Karl Marx & Communism--dressed up recusancy; Israel vs. the Church: A False Dichotomy; BiblicalScholarship.net (1-25-09); Jewish bankers are not the originators of the central bank. Never forget the Mother (look at the Bank of Rome spanning across the centuries.); The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion (don't forget THE MOTHER); The Rabbi & the Roman Priest; Holocaust studies; God Made Whole Things, ugly art and aesthetic signs of the disordered mind of modern man. Life in the concrete jungle--no earthworms, slugs, gardens, fires, life. Just tv, vending machines, grocery stores, soccer games, machine modern living. It impacts all that these people do--from writing textbooks to holding up the corner grocery store to murder to practicing pharmaceutical medicine. Pharisees Alive; term "biosecurity" arises; Deception Series Revisited

Also, did you guys see her "classroom design" page

No money for paper and pencils? Improvise with a stick in the dirt or grab some charcoal from the fireplace and a flat rock. Where I lack, I make do.

Some Webster definitions are not good. I darken them out

If you can't afford pens and paper, you probably don't have a fireplace.

biblicalscholarship.net/classroom.htm

[ViolaSebastian]

My great great grandmother, great grandmother, and grandmother are into brujeria, and they actually recommend using urine to soften the skin and prevent wrinkles. Great great used to take my cloth diapers and put them on her face. Her skin actually is amazing, but I think I'd rather just be wrinkly. I don't think this lady would like having something in common with a bruja.

How do you avoid kissing them 'hello' on the cheek? ;)

[thoughtful]

Year 5: Ezekiel: Prophet of the Captivity; Electing a President of the United States; Barak Obama & John McCain, "Whoever wins, we lose"; Civics; Hebrews; Matthew 24; The Workes (1616) by King James VI & I (summary and read online); Karl Marx & Communism--dressed up recusancy; Israel vs. the Church: A False Dichotomy; BiblicalScholarship.net (1-25-09); Jewish bankers are not the originators of the central bank. Never forget the Mother (look at the Bank of Rome spanning across the centuries.); The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion (don't forget THE MOTHER); The Rabbi & the Roman Priest; Holocaust studies; God Made Whole Things, ugly art and aesthetic signs of the disordered mind of modern man. Life in the concrete jungle--no earthworms, slugs, gardens, fires, life. Just tv, vending machines, grocery stores, soccer games, machine modern living. It impacts all that these people do--from writing textbooks to holding up the corner grocery store to murder to practicing pharmaceutical medicine. Pharisees Alive; term "biosecurity" arises; Deception Series Revisited

:shock: :pink-shock: :shock: :angry-banghead:

Wow. That is quite the recipe for a tin-foil-hat-wearing bigot full of conspiracy theories.

No math, literature, music, etc. -- just paranoia 101.

[anjulibai]

Mennonite Christian testimonies including women who had to put up with no good men--as a warning to never marry a heathen (This strategy was fruitful but there was a problem: Hannah read the same books repeatedly and she wanted to read more books. I had to tear books away from Hannah--BE CAREFUL. Back then I did not know about work as a lifestyle, homesteading, sewing, etc. and I was a reader.)

This makes me so sad. The girl enjoys reading, but that's a bad thing because she should be working instead. Poor child. :(

[Jasmar]

I think the thing that shocked me the most on her site was discovering that she's black ("Did you ever see a black Amish?" under the section on clothing).

[Marianne]

I think the thing that shocked me the most on her site was discovering that she's black ("Did you ever see a black Amish?" under the section on clothing).

I can't find the section on clothing...

[Pandora Moon]

I was looking on her website and I don't think she's off to a good start if she can't spell heretics correctly. She spells it 'hereticks'. It kinda reminds of Christians I've seen who spell Abel as Able and Tract as Track :pull-hair:

[tigerchild]

Urine therapy is very very old, and goes in and out of fad phases, when it's "rediscovered".

I'm not going to run out and try it any time soon, but when one of my instructors in massage school brought his collection of weirdo books for us to thumb through after exams if we wanted (I mean he had EVERYTHING in there, including the naked hippie massage techniques to aromatherapy to the urine cure, not that he advocated anything, but he happens to collect weird ass 'alternative medicine' stuff like I collect 1950s housewife manuals) and he had like 3 books in there. Most of them seemed to be a yoga thing (the religious/lifestyle part and written way before it all became cool/mainstream judging by the state of the old books).

So I don't doubt that this makes the rounds of fundie circles, as alternative back to the bible medicinal practices. It's always kind of amused me that my fundie relatives AND my far out woo woo massage therapist colleagues and friends often are very into the same sort of alternative healt thing. (For the record TO MY KNOWLEDGE none of them drink their own pee every day, but I'm not sure they would tell me if they did...)