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Knight of Ni

Half of Americans don't want atheist in-laws

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Knight of Ni

CNN recently posted a story about the current attitudes towards atheists. Less than half said they would be fine with a close family member marrying an atheist. This is surprising in some ways but in other ways it's not not surprising at all. It is always a surprise, at first, when I hear that people still hold archaic views. But then when I think about the current state of society in the US, I'm not surprised at all. A very good friend of mine has been all but dis-owned by her parents for dating someone who is agnostic. They tell her she is sinning and displeasing God. It's very sad. I have also known people who think that being a good person is a prerequisite for being a good person. This person has stated that before the Christian missionaries brought their religion to the native populations of Africa and the Americas there was no hint of morals in their society. She said this with no hint of sarcasm. She actually believes it. It would be interesting to see how attitudes have changed on this topic from a generation ago and how it will be a generation from now.

 

http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2014/06/2 ... tstorylink

 

not breaking link because it's CNN.

Edited by OnceUponATime
adding tags

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Howl

And the other half ARE the atheist in laws.

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Dizzy
tankgirl

I wish I had atheist inlaws! And I am Pagan, so I do follow a religion, and would have been thrilled. Would be much nicer then when the inlaws, threatened to take our baby in to get Baptized, even if they had to take the baby in behind our backs. I wasn't sure how serious they were so I actually wouldn't leave them alone with the baby, till... actually I still haven't left them alone with him and its been 6 years.

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Jana814
I wish I had atheist inlaws! And I am Pagan, so I do follow a religion, and would have been thrilled. Would be much nicer then when the inlaws, threatened to take our baby in to get Baptized, even if they had to take the baby in behind our backs. I wasn't sure how serious they were so I actually wouldn't leave them alone with the baby, till... actually I still haven't left them alone with him and its been 6 years.

That's insane that they wanted to baptize your child against your wishes. I would be soo pissed. Smart move not letting them alone w/ your child.

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Joan of Snarc

And the other half of us don't want religious in-laws.

:fsm:

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doggie

the stupid thing of not trusting anyone who does not have the thread of a god controlling them is very annoying. Time and time again Christians have proven they are no better then anyone else. time and time again they do bad and horrible things and only require saying they have been forgiven by god and they are trusted again.

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FloraDoraDolly

I'm not married and I am too old to have kids, but for me it would depend on what kind of atheist. If the in-laws are quiet and respectful of my beliefs and practices, then that's no problem. But if they're the in-your-face militant types who would scream at me for celebrating Christmas or who would want me to pull my kid out of school over the Pledge of Allegiance, then no, I wouldn't want them in my extended family. There's already enough drama on that front.

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dairyfreelife
And the other half of us don't want religious in-laws.

:fsm:

If I marry my current bf, my in-laws would be religious...but since they are Hindus I don't think that would be approved my most of those who don't want atheist in-laws either. :whistle:

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anniebgood

We'll see how this plays out when my kids finally decide to settle down. The first one to move out (lives and works in Chicago) is taking a church break, though she will attend when she is home. Oldest one still lives here and goes for Ash Wednesday, Easter, and Christmas. I attend though not regularly because I have a severe problem with the quality of the music. Its just me.

The errant spouse has now espoused to everyone within hearing and FB posting that he is now an atheist. His God is science. (In his life he's been Presbyterian, agnostic, Lutheran ---had to convert or I wouldn't marry him----Amway & Covenant---- agnostic and now atheist.

We don't agree on things and I've found that if we don't have to discuss them life rolls on. The kids basically ignore his rants and raves, I am pretty sure that my kids are spiritually grounded.

My inlaws weren't churched as adults because they'd been dragged through Tx and Ok churches as kids. We didn't discuss it.

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Rachel333

My cousin married an atheist and though everyone in my family likes him, they all thought it was a huge mistake. You're not supposed to be "unequally yoked" no matter how nice the other person is.

I kind of want to see how they'd react if I married an atheist woman from a Muslim family. :lol:

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Mama Mia

I don't see why people are so concerned and scared of being around anyone whose beliefs are different than their own. Part of what makes life interesting is hearing other people's perspectives. Of course anyone can go overboard and try to shove their beliefs down their new family members throat and no one wants that -- but they can do that on any topic from politics to sports - religion is just one of a hundred ways people can be overbearing.

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Joan of Snarc
I'm not married and I am too old to have kids, but for me it would depend on what kind of atheist. If the in-laws are quiet and respectful of my beliefs and practices, then that's no problem. But if they're the in-your-face militant types who would scream at me for celebrating Christmas or who would want me to pull my kid out of school over the Pledge of Allegiance, then no, I wouldn't want them in my extended family. There's already enough drama on that front.

Do these types of people exist? I've never heard of such a thing. In fact, I've never known an atheist to knock at my door, try to get me to join his/her club, try to force their worldview on me, leave scary, hate-filled literature on my windshied or at my home, to threaten me with a generally bad time if I don't adopt their point of view, or yell at passers-by on the street. Unlike Christians, atheists don't recruit; so where are these "militant" atheists? And they're screaming at people for celebrating Christmas? Wut? Everybody knows Christmas is a pagan holiday, anyway.

:fsm:

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nellautumngirl

Do these types of people exist? I've never heard of such a thing. In fact, I've never known an atheist to knock at my door, try to get me to join his/her club, try to force their worldview on me, leave scary, hate-filled literature on my windshied or at my home, to threaten me with a generally bad time if I don't adopt their point of view, or yell at passers-by on the street. Unlike Christians, atheists don't recruit; so where are these "militant" atheists? And they're screaming at people for celebrating Christmas? Wut? Everybody knows Christmas is a pagan holiday, anyway.

:fsm:

I was going to say the exact same thing. I've never met or heard of such a person.

I've also never met militant Christians, but that might have more to do with me living in secular Germany. I hear a lot about them from you guys here, so I know they exist.

I'm uncomfortable with religion in the sense that it's simply out of my comfort zone, I don't like thinking about it, I don't like listening to others talk about it, I don't even like going to churches for a wedding. So I can sort of see where these people are coming from, and I try not to be offended. It's such a generalization as well. Half the people might say that, but if they actually meet the person in question it could be another story. Sometimes I wish there was no religion, or at least no Christianity. Imo it's not been a force for good in the world overall.

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Tired
Coconut Flan

There are the occasional atheists who try to interfere with relatives and religious activities. We had one in our family. The same relative would occasionally make rude remarks to other people when they expressed religious ideas, but most of it was reserved for family.

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nellautumngirl
There are the occasional atheists who try to interfere with relatives and religious activities. We had one in our family. The same relative would occasionally make rude remarks to other people when they expressed religious ideas, but most of it was reserved for family.

What did he say? Was it really some variation of "You're stupid for believing in religion"? How awkward for the rest of the family.

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Peas n carrots

I don't know what you would call my inlaws...irreligious perhaps? They aren't promoting themselves as atheist, but they certainly aren't believers either. It's just not important to them.

And I adore my inlaws :dance:

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uber frau

Do these types of people exist? I've never heard of such a thing. In fact, I've never known an atheist to knock at my door, try to get me to join his/her club, try to force their worldview on me, leave scary, hate-filled literature on my windshied or at my home, to threaten me with a generally bad time if I don't adopt their point of view, or yell at passers-by on the street. Unlike Christians, atheists don't recruit; so where are these "militant" atheists? And they're screaming at people for celebrating Christmas? Wut? Everybody knows Christmas is a pagan holiday, anyway.

:fsm:

Yes, mine. My parents are fundie and pushy about their religion, my ILs are atheist and worse. They've put effort into converting our daughter. I have no objections to the atheism (I'm one myself-albeit a quiet one). I have a massive problem with the strawman arguments and the complete rudeness and disrespect for the way other ppl choose to do things. I'm trying to teach my daughter to be decent human being, they seem to want her to be as close minded and bigoted as the worst of the fundie crowd I grew up in.

(But then my MIL also bullies her students to get an abortion if they get pregnant as well. To the point where she'll book the appointment without discussion and quit teaching any student who doesn't comply. She's an atheist fundamentalist and a complete bitch).

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RosyDaisy

It does not matter to me if my future in-laws are atheists or religious. Some atheists I know have more morals than most Christians I know.

ETA: My future in-laws are liberal Christians, and we get along great.

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Tired
Coconut Flan
What did he say? Was it really some variation of "You're stupid for believing in religion"? How awkward for the rest of the family.

Variations of you're idiots and stupid. It's a waste of time. How gullible can you be to believe in lies. It's just fairy tales. It's an opiate for weak minded people. He tried to block the door a few times as people were leaving for church. Called people names. You get the idea.

Yes, awkward, rude, intolerant, and narrow minded. When he became an atheist, he became as obnoxious as any fundie who was just "saved." He needed to spread the message.

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DGayle

When a Christian is preaching about how atheism is the expressway to hell and that god is good and great, atheists are supposed to respect the Christian's beliefs by letting that person go on.

When an atheist is preaching about how Christianity has been used to kill more people in this world than all other reasons, and is now being used to try to control people, Christians have the right to tell them to knock it off.

Such different treatments, and in both situations, the atheist loses.

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Tired
Coconut Flan

Oops, I've been doing it wrong. I tell both of them to hush and leave me alone.

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DGayle

Do these types of people exist? I've never heard of such a thing. In fact, I've never known an atheist to knock at my door, try to get me to join his/her club, try to force their worldview on me, leave scary, hate-filled literature on my windshied or at my home, to threaten me with a generally bad time if I don't adopt their point of view, or yell at passers-by on the street. Unlike Christians, atheists don't recruit; so where are these "militant" atheists? And they're screaming at people for celebrating Christmas? Wut? Everybody knows Christmas is a pagan holiday, anyway.

:fsm:

I have a friend who tried claiming recently that "homosexuals" have been leaving pamphlets trying to "recruit" her. When I pressed for more info, she said they're leaving information about a new organization for LGBT acceptance. I'm not sure how she turned that into trying to recruit people to being gay.

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RachelB

I'm not married, so I have outlaws instead of in-laws.

They were both raised Christian, but neither of them has been in church other than for a wedding or funeral in a couple of decades. I am very fond of them, not least because they both understand / are comfortable with their own children's atheism and understand / are comfortable with what I get out of religious faith and practice.

I wish more parents were like them! There would be a lot more happy people in the world.

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FloraKitty35
Oops, I've been doing it wrong. I tell both of them to hush and leave me alone.

Me too.

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