Jim Bob The Matchmaker

[BeccaGrim]

I was thinking last night as I was watching the engagement episode that Jim Bob has set both of his daughters up with the men who will be (or might become) their husbands. He told Ben to text Jessa about bible texts and thought Derick would work for Jill because of their 'sweet hearts.' And then I look at Jana getting choked up about Jill leaving. it has to be painful that Dad, the matchmaker, hasn't sought out a man for her yet. Or for Jinger. How does he decide which girl to introduce to men? Sigh.

[jerichojones]

From what I gather, men approach JB and express interest in a specific daughter and then JB goes to the daughter in question and they say whether they're interested or not.

Of course, that's what they all SAY, but it doesn't mean it works that way.

[Letgo]

From what I gather, men approach JB and express interest in a specific daughter and then JB goes to the daughter in question and they say whether they're interested or not.

Of course, that's what they all SAY, but it doesn't mean it works that way.

That is the usual way that courtship works. However, JB did point Derick toward Jill. I think he did the same with Jessa, didn't he? Ben was texting or discussing Bible verses or theology with him and he told him to text Jessa. She had the same thoughts as Ben, I believe? Or enjoyed discussions about theology? I do think it speaks well of him as a father that he knew the type of guy each daughter might like. Jinger is closer in age to Ben, yet he told Ben to text Jessa.

[BeccaGrim]

I think the idea is that men are supposed to express interest. He either puts them off or goes to the daughter to find out their interest. But, Michelle says that Jim Bob has always put off the guys and then talked to them about prayer. He set up Derick and Jill and pretty much Jessa and Ben, too.

[Toothfairy]

I wonder why now? Besides ratings. It's been said guys have expressed interest for years.

[Kira]

I wonder why now? Besides ratings. It's been said guys have expressed interest for years.

Jim Bob said the guys who've expressed interest in the past weren't serious. I think the girls said they were "weirdos". Ben could be the first guy the girls or Jim Bob considered a real choice for courtship. Having to please the girl's father probably makes it difficult for guys to express their interest in the girls. After Ben broke the ice, it was "open season".

[AndyActually]

I think Jim Bob being a matchmaker might be an overrated concept. Maybe in his mind he was the matchmaker for Ben and Jessa, but from what Ben has said and the side comments from the rest of the family, Ben and Jessa had already expressed an interest in each other. Jim Bob might not have known it, but all he really did was give the "ok".

[jerichojones]

IIRC, JB also said that the girls weren't really interested in courting until now but they've had friends courting and getting married recently and they've realised that they're at "that age".

I can't remember if he actually did say that, if it was in my imagination or if it was someone here that said it.

[Coco]

I was thinking last night as I was watching the engagement episode that Jim Bob has set both of his daughters up with the men who will be (or might become) their husbands. He told Ben to text Jessa about bible texts and thought Derick would work for Jill because of their 'sweet hearts.' And then I look at Jana getting choked up about Jill leaving. it has to be painful that Dad, the matchmaker, hasn't sought out a man for her yet. Or for Jinger. How does he decide which girl to introduce to men? Sigh.

That breaks my heart for Jana, seeing her sisters go on to the next stage while she waits, if she actually does want to get married. Two of my younger sisters married before I did, and I know the feeling of being passed over, like there's something wrong with you because you don't have a man yet. I hope for her sake that it's not like that, and that she has her pick of several guys. If i could tell her anything it would be, don't worry! When he comes along it will be worth it in the end. I didn't marry til i was 28 and i'm glad that I got to experience single life. One of my sister's marriage didn't work out because she just didn't know the guy very well. It's worth the wait.

[Dandruff]

There have been episodes in past seasons that have seemed almost like personal ads for Jana; e.g. when they were preparing to go to FL for Josh's or the Waller wedding (don't remember which it was). Lots of compliments about her. What I don't get is why they'd see a reason to bother - assuming that's what they were doing - it already seems pretty clear that she's kind, attractive, nurturing, and very good around the house. Maybe she really does want to marry and they were trying to help or she was depressed and they were trying to make her feel better.

I don't know how much of a matchmaker Jim Bob is, though I can see him wanting to be perceived as one. My recollection is that Jessa said that Ben had briefly introduced himself to her at their church, then Jim Bob spoke with Ben at the house and suggested that he text Jessa. I'm still trying to figure out how Derick knew Jim Bob. It doesn't make sense to me that Derick went to Nepal, decided for some reason that Jim Bob Duggar back in Arkansas (who he had never met) would be the right prayer partner for him, then the rest was history.

[Kira]

It doesn't make sense to me that Derick went to Nepal, decided for some reason that Jim Bob Duggar back in Arkansas (who he had never met) would be the right prayer partner for him, then the rest was history.

Maybe Derick and Jim Bob became prayer partners in Arkansas before Derick went to Nepal.

[marmalade]

That is the usual way that courtship works. However, JB did point Derick toward Jill. I think he did the same with Jessa, didn't he? Ben was texting or discussing Bible verses or theology with him and he told him to text Jessa. She had the same thoughts as Ben, I believe? Or enjoyed discussions about theology? I do think it speaks well of him as a father that he knew the type of guy each daughter might like. Jinger is closer in age to Ben, yet he told Ben to text Jessa.

Small correction with Benessa. Ben saw Jessa on TV and got his parents to attend the Duggar church a few times. Boob apparently noticed Ben's eye on Jessa and gave him permission to text her about "theology."

I don't remember the girls being consulted in either case; Boob just told the guys to text his daughters. I guess from there it was up to Jill and/or Jessa to reject the guys in this "getting to know you" phase.

[Janes Heir]

I wonder what this "theology" they discussed refers to. I'm guessing just lifestyle stuff about being sweet, keeping pure, etc. I'm younger than Jessa and would love a boyfriend who could intelligently discuss Arminianism, Barth, Liberation theology, theories of the atonement, and hermeneutics.

[TRexGurl]

JB gets most of the say it seems even if someone comes to him and asks about one of the girls and I can only assume that if he allows to many of the older Duggars to court/get married at once than they are going to need outside help for the younger children. I thought by now Michelle would have stepped up to help a little more. You still mostly see them just gathering the family for announcements and as talking heads.

Also I know Josh met Anna at a conference but is the general rule for dad to pick a lady for the boys? If John David is living on his own maybe he is *gasp* dating!

[Ella]

I just watched the episode where the older girls go back to the TTH to pack a few things to bring back to where the family is staying near Josie while she is hospitalized after her birth. Lo and behold, it seems that John-David and Joseph stayed back at the TTH alone and didn't follow the rest of the family at that time.

Not that they cleaned the place. Jessa said she hadn't expected them to. The girls found moldy vegetables in a covered bowl that had escaped the boys' notice.

I'm guessing that if John-David has moved to the house he bought, Joseph is with him. Living alone would be discouraged, right? No accountability, and with such a drastic change a Duggar would be very lonely and likely freaked out.