Erika Shupe says you need less entertainment

[Coco]

I will take my messy, disorganized house (which is bigger than Erika's and there's just two of us), the dog hair on the carpet, the dishes that need to go in the dishwasher and my jeans on the back of the couch over Erika's "organization" any day and twice on Sunday. Does this woman not understand that sometimes folks just need to BE??? I feel sorry for her children. No imagination, no fun, no cutting loose and just enjoying a summer or winter's day, curling up with a good book and a cup of hot cocoa, kicking back on the couch or floor and watching a movie as a family...how horridly boring their lives must be. No thanks y'all!

Amen!

Somewhere i heard that foster parents have a home tour to get qualified and it's actually better in the eyes of social workers if the house is a little bit lived in. Perfect house = red flags. They want "clean enough to be healthy, messy enough to be happy". It just won't be perfectly clean if the parents get out with the kids and have fun. Unless the mom is staying up all night to clean which means - grouchy, impatient mom. lol

btw googling for that rule about foster care parents was a dead end but i did find this list of what the parents need to prepare to deal with:

Following are some characteristics that we look for in a foster parent or adoptive family:

Ability to establish nurturing, structured relationships with children

Ability to demonstrate good coping skills and a strong support system

Ability to provide physical and emotional care and appropriate supervision

Willingness to learn special skills required to parent a child's specific needs

Ability to understand and show acceptance of the child's family

Ability to help a child cope with separation and loss

Commitment to utilize non-physical forms of discipline

Awareness of the crises, stresses and social problems that abused and neglected children often suffer

Ability to handle difficult behaviors, such as defiance, running away, excessive lying, stealing, truancy, sexualized behaviors, aggression, and substance abuse

Willingness to seek professional assistance for the child or themselves

Willingness to comply with child welfare rules, regulations and case plans

And my 4 year old is a total pill that runs around in stores, hollers, whoops it up and makes a huge mess of the house. So i was like, prep for foster care! And immediately thought, omg fundie logic, GOD led me to this so i can learn fostering skillz from dealing with ms. brattykins!!!!!11!!!11 :lol: you know you're on FJ too much when you start thinking like a fundie....

[elsabee]

From her FB page:

HELP WITH PRODUCTIVITY & LEARNING - I was told something at the recent Christian Heritage Homeschool and Family Discipleship Conference that really struck a chord with me, and which I thought you all might benefit from as well. That it's not only good to strive to be more productive and learning with our time, but to *actually have less entertainment available*. I often think we should be listening more to hymns during our days than Broadway musical music or movie sound tracks; that we should listen to messages in the car instead of audio books all the time; that we should have more non-fiction reading in our home than fictional. But so often in my weakness I desire the "dessert" type of time-users rather than the "meaty" ones. And it has so helped me to do what my spirit was leading me to - by not having the entertainment even available! How simple! We don't keep audio books in the car, but albums of messages. We don't check out from the library all the fictional reading (chapter books for older kids - we still get all the little kid's books), but rather non-fiction, educational books. Years ago we removed our TV from our home so it's not even a temptation to vegging out and watching it. There's nothing inherently wrong with Broadway musicals, audio books, or TV - but when used in excess it's a waste of valuable time. So we simply have less "dessert" available and more "meat" and we're all growing again spiritually and in character, catching vision for our future goals, remembering why we're here on this earth, and having rich conversations! Praise the Lord. *smile*

This woman is seriously insane. :wtf:

NO NOVELS. Not even Narnia? Not even those blasted Elsie Dinsmore books? Yee gads. Those children are rebelling the second they hit eighteen, if not sooner.

[Trynn]

NO NOVELS. Not even Narnia? Not even those blasted Elsie Dinsmore books? Yee gads. Those children are rebelling the second they hit eighteen, if not sooner.

Actually, I wouldn't blame a parent who wanted to censor Elsie Dinsmore...

At least until my kids get to a certain age, I don't plan on letting them know of its existence.

My kids will have a metric ton if other books to read, so I doubt they'd ven miss it.

And we would be havin some serious talks if they chose to read Narnia as well, because Lewis' portrayal of Jesus via Aslan is.... Well, my kids and I will discuss books, and talk about the elements I find problematic. In any series, really.

[Jana814]

That's so wrong that she made her daughter get up w/ her to feed her twins.

[Marianne]

I'm reading all this blog... She's crazy. The life of this children is SO miserable. Seriously. She's trying to add some joy, but it just feels miserable. In a family picture, everyone seems happy, until you look good and see that the eyes of a little boy are full of tears. That's like this blog. If you don't really read it, you see a big family well organised. If you read it, you see crazyness and abuse.

(the picture : http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-xLfm8o2PB3Y/U ... 00/025.JPG )

[ILoveJellybeans]

I never noticed that, but yeah, the little boy on the right looks upset.

[Marianne]

One of her favorite book is "Creative correction" who advocates spanking (of course), hot sauce on the tongue, blindfolding children for an hour if they roll their eyes, handcuffing quarreling siblings together, and, in general, humiliation and violence.

[ILoveJellybeans]

One of her favorite book is "Creative correction" who advocates spanking (of course), hot sauce on the tongue, blindfolding children for an hour if they roll their eyes, handcuffing quarreling siblings together, and, in general, humiliation and violence.

Wow, that is awful.

And a bad idea, even just taking the humiliation and violence out of the equation, cause we all know where the average user here stands on that, I think handcuffing siblings together if they argue is just going to make things worse, as they cant go into other rooms to avoid them, its just going to make it easier for them to fight, and blindfolding a kid for an hour sounds dangerous.

[Curious]

This list is exactly why no responsible adoption agency should ever adopt a child out to a fundie, IMO.

There are so many things on that list we know the average fundie can't/won't do.

[Coco]

This list is exactly why no responsible adoption agency should ever adopt a child out to a fundie, IMO.

There are so many things on that list we know the average fundie can't/won't do.

True. About the no-spanking bit, I've got a close (semi-fundie but flexible) friend who has adopted multiple kids. She really does make the non-violent discipline thing work. Her kids prove are living proof that we don't have to use corporal punishment to raise healthy, well-adjusted children.

[Coco]

From this picture i assumed the Shupes had two sets of twins! (the littlest boys are really close together, i guess).

Maybe that's why she doesn't want the kids to read novels... like Anne of Green Gables... :lol:

Mrs. Spencer: "As a matter of fact, Mrs. Bluett was up here yesterday asking me if i could get her a little girl. She has such a large family, you know! Ten children, and another one on the way. She's simply beside herself for help.

Anne: "Excuse me, Mrs. Spencer. Would there happen to be any twins among them?"

Mrs. Spencer: "Oh! She has two sets of twins! How did you know, child?"

Anne: "Twins seem to be my lot in life."

Marilla, later: "I wouldn't give a dog I liked to that Bluett woman."

See whole movie for free here: solarmovie.tl/link/play/1151355/ (This part starts at 28:00)

I can hardly believe that she would deny her children classic literature. They're missing so much beauty.

[Jana814]

Yes her youngest girls r twins. She said in a post that I read that she had 4 kids in 22 months.

[ILoveJellybeans]

Yeah, the two littlest boys do look like twins, but theres about a year between them. The oldest two boys are about the same size too-the oldest boy is really, really short for his age. Theres only one set of twins-the little girls. Im so glad that it appears that Erika's baby factory has closed up shop, as any more and they would have to make one of them sleep under the dining room table, those tiny rooms just couldn't fit any more in.

[carebear]

How old is Erika now? I wonder if she is entering a new "season of life"...

[16strong]

The oldest boy isn't the only Shupe kid who doesn't look their age. I am always surprised by the fact that the oldest two girls are only about a year apart. The oldest daughter, Karen, looks at least several years older than she is, and the younger daughter looks much closer to her age, although maybe a bit younger-looking in the face. It's really weird, at least to me.

[JaChelle Sugar]

Actually, I wouldn't blame a parent who wanted to censor Elsie Dinsmore...

At least until my kids get to a certain age, I don't plan on letting them know of its existence.

My kids will have a metric ton if other books to read, so I doubt they'd ven miss it.

And we would be havin some serious talks if they chose to read Narnia as well, because Lewis' portrayal of Jesus via Aslan is.... Well, my kids and I will discuss books, and talk about the elements I find problematic. In any series, really.

Ooh, problems with evangelicals sacred cow aslan? Tell us more.

[Coco]

Ooh, problems with evangelicals sacred cow aslan? Tell us more.

For me it was the part about the Calormene soldier Emeth, who worshiped the evil guy in Narnia, Tash. (This is probably more than you wanted to know) :lol:

Emeth's total devotion to Tash earned him a place in Aslan's country. I just always thought that was really odd.

As a Calormene, Emeth was raised to follow Tash, the antithesis of Aslan, and did so with an emphatic devotion and loyalty. Nevertheless, Emeth manages to travel to Aslan's paradisaical country after the destruction of Narnia, and is welcomed by Aslan.[1] Because he worshipped a devil and not God, his acceptance has been controversial with some Christians who disagree with Lewis' soteriology. Specifically, the 'salvation' of Emeth is understood to be an implicit endorsement of Inclusivism.[2]

Emeth knew about Aslan, but chose to serve Tash. He was saved just because of the purity of his devotion.

At the end of the world, everyone passes through a stable door that opens into Aslan's Country. Some can't see anything, because they think they're in a stable. The evil ones are killed by Tash, the saved ones see Aslan's country and run to Aslan.

But this bit is interesting because it sounds like fundies. They're "in" the kingdom but they can't see how free they are or how beautiful life is, because they are trapped by their own beliefs:

The dwarfs are there and are as unfriendly as ever, as Lucy points out. However, they acted strangely, sitting in a tight circle, not looking around or noticing anyone around them. As it turns out, they believe they are in a dark stable and act accordingly. After many attempts to show the dwarfs that they were, in fact, in the great outdoors with flowers and grass and birds had failed. Without warning, Aslan suddenly appears before them. Lucy begs Aslan to do something about the dwarfs, but even Aslan is unable to bring their vision to them. He says that their prison is in their own minds and that their fear of being "taken in" keeps them from being taken out.

[Marianne]

Oh God, I've always think that Narnia is a big trip on LSD :roll:

I need to stop reading Erika blog. The last time that I see "scheduling" "organizing" "decluterring", I kill a kittens. (but I don't have kittens, so I will hug my dog !)

[Coco]

Oh God, I've always think that Narnia is a big trip on LSD :roll:

yeah, sorry lol i've been bored since my hubby's away on work and i don't have to cook or clean as much :D i should get out and garden or something instead of being addicted to FJ!

[Marianne]

But, seriously, the first book of narnia, The Magician's Nephew, it's one of the most WTF fantasy books that I have read when I was young :lol:

[guidedbybobafett]

I just think it's kind of heartbreaking that fundies (and, of course, many others) haven't figured out that their children are people. Are they silly people sometimes? Yes. Are they people that you need to tell what to do sometimes, even if it makes them upset? Yes. But a child expressing frustration is somehow so abhorrent to these people that they take drastic measures to assure it happens as little as possible, all the while whining on their blogs about how frustrating it can be to get kids to stop voicing or acting out their frustration.

Hey Erika, if even the smallest part of you is using your blog as an outlet you should definitely stop- there are certainly more godly ways you could be spending your time.

[nelliebelle1197]

I've actually never read Chekov- I lean towards German classic authors more, since I'm fluently bilingual (SO much better in the original language!) and was a German Studies major in college. I really like Goethe and Thomas Mann, and my favorite poet is Rilke. I'm trying to memorize "Nachtgedanken," Rilke's famous poem about Germany that he wrote while exiled to France, at the moment.

But Kafka's definitely my favorite. It so happened that we were assigned "The Metamorphosis" in class during the time I first was coming out, and struggling with depression. The story is about a normal man who wakes up one morning transformed into a giant, vile bug. He deals with how his family and others treat him, and how his "transformation" changes his worldview.

My professor posited that, since Kafka was Jewish and the book was written in the 1930s, the "becoming dehumanized" thing was an allegory and foreshadowing for how the Nazis discriminated against (and would later try to "exterminate," like insects), Jews.

I realize that's probably correct, but I identified strongly with the protagonist myself. I was undergoing my own "transformation" and dealing with how other people might then see me as "vile" or "less." I also felt as though I were like that insect inside, and hiding it, with regards to having problems, so the story really spoke to me.

That's the joy of literature- it speaks to you in ways the author may not have intended. I doubt anyone has ever had varying interpretations of Danielle Steel...

[church_of_dog]

Agreed, the choice is the important part. I read mostly non-fiction, and the little fiction I do read is not very high quality -- but I have my reasons why I do what I do, and the point is that I'm making my own choices. In fact, as a borderline ascetic with some very non-traditional ideas about society, and about human psychology, I endorse a variety of things in my personal daily life that are nontraditional, including some that are snarked on here. But -- I'm not imposing my choices on anyone else, and I'm free to change my decisions as my opinions evolve. And of course I don't base my decisions on what some sky daddy or even flying spaghetti monster tells me to do -- I do things based on what I value and what is logical to me.

[Rescinded and Mended]

That's the joy of literature- it speaks to you in ways the author may not have intended. I doubt anyone has ever had varying interpretations of Danielle Steel...

I did on one point, and it made me never want to pick up another of Danielle Steel's books. In the novel 'Jewels,' William and Sarah are trying to rebuild their family fortunes after WWII. They want to start a jewelry store, and manage to do so by exploiting Jewish refugees of the Holocaust. These people would come to William and Sarah with nothing except beautiful family heirlooms, wanting to sell because they had no homes or money. The couple buys these fabulous jewels for a pittance, knowing that they are worth more, and uses them to establish the foundation of their jewelry business.

I don't know if Steel was attempting to be historically accurate or not, but the flippant manner in which she describes the exploitation of these refugees disgusted me to the point that I never wanted to read another one of her books.

[JaChelle Sugar]

It's true, some controversial theology in the last battle. Personally I always saw the Emeth thing as, he was a good person, and that mattered more than the name of his god.