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Is Jana Dugger Courting?


LongDogMom

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I'd never really thought of erin being less than happy now but when you look at the honeymoon pics she isn't beaming like Alyssa is in hers.

You ever flown overseas and experienced jet lag? It's horrible, we recently moved back to the states from Germany and I hated every time I had to travel back and forth because the jet lag will destroy you.

Alyssa traveling west makes the jet lag bearable and you just wake up a little earlier. Going east, you lose about 7-8 hours and the adjustment sucks.

I doubt it was anything more, but you know how it goes. One weak smile in a picture and speculation goes wild that she's miserable and unhappy and cracking. Because internet!

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This. I firmly believe she does NOT want to start courting and have a gazillion kids. She seems like the smartest of the bunch and the one who is the most disillusioned with the lifestyle. Also, she has a free place to stay and the opportunity to travel and do what she wants. If she married, most likely money would be tight and she'd have tons of babies to care for. Sure, she has to help raise her younger siblings, but she doesn't know anything different. And a courtship and marriage to a complete stranger (even if its a 4 month courtship/engagement) is a HUGE leap that can be very traumatic. Just look at how Erin (Bates) crumbled under the newlywed stress.

Stay single as long as you can, Jana.

I believe Jana likes the Duggar lifestyle. She willingly participates in ATI programs. It's easy to think that Jana(or other fundie girls) don't want to get married and have lots of kids, but we see fundie children follow in their parents footsteps all the time.

Erin didn't crumble. Chad talked about marriage and how people can deal with marital problems. I don't think it had anything to do with Chad and Erin's marriage. Every newlywed fundie think they're an expert and love to give marriage advice.

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The creepiness of the phrase "special friend" genuinely makes me shiver (or should I say quiver...) it's no better than the word boyfriend so I don't understand why they say it?

"special friend" makes me think of a period. I think my mother used to call it that. "Is your special friend visiting?" :shudder:

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"special friend" makes me think of a period. I think my mother used to call it that. "Is your special friend visiting?" :shudder:

My mom never did that. Instead, she'd do things like yelling "What are you on your period?!" obnoxiously loudly at a gas station one day when I was being particularly a ornery 16 year old during a stupidly long car ride in which I was forced to sit next to my sister (my sister and I have a very small window of time in which we can exist in the same space without fighting).

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I believe Jana likes the Duggar lifestyle. She willingly participates in ATI programs. It's easy to think that Jana(or other fundie girls) don't want to get married and have lots of kids, but we see fundie children follow in their parents footsteps all the time.

Erin didn't crumble. Chad talked about marriage and how people can deal with marital problems. I don't think it had anything to do with Chad and Erin's marriage. Every newlywed fundie think they're an expert and love to give marriage advice.

Maybe Jana does like her life, but it's the only life she knows. I think she attend ATI events to get out of being sistermom and deal with her resentment towards her family. I hope she does find a nice man to court her and maybe even some therapy. She needs it. It has to be hard being the oldest girl and raising her siblings, with no time for herself. It's always about everyone else.

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My mom never did that. Instead, she'd do things like yelling "What are you on your period?!" obnoxiously loudly at a gas station one day when I was being particularly a ornery 16 year old during a stupidly long car ride in which I was forced to sit next to my sister (my sister and I have a very small window of time in which we can exist in the same space without fighting).

My mother had one of those cute long baskets that is divided in thirds next to the toilet filled with pads. At all times. She never put it way and never understood why it was embarrassing for me. No wonder I used to think that when girls got their periods they never went away.

Anyhow, on to Jana. She may very well be courting but if she isn't, I hope it's soon. She's 25. Sarah Maxwell is what? 30? She's dangerously close to spinster-age in their land. Of course, there was that 30-something year old couple who married last year and were photographed by Chris Maxwell so who knows.

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Anyhow, on to Jana. She may very well be courting but if she isn't, I hope it's soon. She's 25. Sarah Maxwell is what? 30? She's dangerously close to spinster-age in their land. Of course, there was that 30-something year old couple who married last year and were photographed by Chris Maxwell so who knows.

Jana just turned 24 in January and there are tons of Fundie girls out there older than her or that married older than her.

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Saw this on the Duggar Tumblr

9:47 am1 note

Q: I was wondering who this austin4sites guy was? The duggars are following him on instagram and he commented on that picture Laura D. uploaded, Jana is his favorite too. Could just be nothing, but i'm curious...

Anonymous

He is another really good friend of the duggars… He hangs out a lot with andrew Patton. I would say it was nothing also. I saw the comment and I wouldn’t read to much into that one honestly.

Isn't he the guy that we investigated as a possible courtship for JIll when that picture surfaced?

EDIT: Here's the link to the pic being referred to

http: //instagram.com/p/ootA40nBQg/

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Saw this on the Duggar Tumblr

9:47 am1 note

Q: I was wondering who this austin4sites guy was? The duggars are following him on instagram and he commented on that picture Laura D. uploaded, Jana is his favorite too. Could just be nothing, but i'm curious...

Anonymous

He is another really good friend of the duggars… He hangs out a lot with andrew Patton. I would say it was nothing also. I saw the comment and I wouldn’t read to much into that one honestly.

Isn't he the guy that we investigated as a possible courtship for JIll when that picture surfaced?

EDIT: Here's the link to the pic being referred to

http: //instagram.com/p/ootA40nBQg/

Yea, he definitely came up. But, I think he was deemed too young. I can't remember for sure. There were a lot of names thrown around.

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I think Jana might be courting. I'm only speculating that she is based on a comment Jill made in a TH where Jill was talking about her courting Derick, Ben and Jessa, and then looked at Jana and said "no one else is courting, that we know of" or something like that. There was a bit of discussion about it on these boards, and I think I'm in the minority on how I interpreted the TH, but I still think Jana is courting.

I've always thought Jana was the prettiest of the older girls, though the eyeliner bugs me (lol). People are always commenting that she seems sad, but I think she's just reserved and introverted and struggles with her parents' outlook on that. I was watching the 14 kids and counting on youtube, and Jana seemed the most awkward and not happy about being in front of a camera, even at that age. I believe that the Duggar kids are 'trained' that it's a sin to be shy/reserved, because you aren't putting others' comfort ahead of yourself or something like that (they've made comments about it in their book or at least on the show). They teach the little kids to not turn their heads away from strangers, and practice greeting strangers, etc. Anyway.

I think Jana has made comments about wanting kids, but she's spent her whole life raising kids and I don't think she's as anxious as say, Jill, to start a family. I don't believe, nor do I think anyone believes, for one second that guys haven't tried to start courting with her. So I think Jana is definitely doing what she wants with life for now.

So those are my rambling thoughts on Jana.

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What you said about them being taught being reserved and shy is a sin may have some truth to it.

I have a friend who grew up probably how we would describe here as fundielite and she was taught at her Christian school and church that being shy was a sin.

The pastor actually said being shy was not submitting to God's will because it prevented them from sharing the word.

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I believe that the Duggar kids are 'trained' that it's a sin to be shy/reserved, because you aren't putting others' comfort ahead of yourself or something like that (they've made comments about it in their book or at least on the show). They teach the little kids to not turn their heads away from strangers, and practice greeting strangers, etc.

I remember this too! I very much hearing or reading them saying something along the lines of "people say "its cute" when kids are shy but it's not. It's disrespectful." These people actually believe shyness is disrespectful. Fucking crazy.

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I remember this too! I very much hearing or reading them saying something along the lines of "people say "its cute" when kids are shy but it's not. It's disrespectful." These people actually believe shyness is disrespectful. Fucking crazy.

Yikes! This makes me really sad forJana and the two younger girls Jordyn and Jennifer they all naturally seem to quieter people. I shudder at the kind of training/abuse they had to deal with to get them to be more "respectful"

Especially Jana at least Jennifer and Jordyn have constant cameras around tat probably stops a lot of the "training"

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O M G ... there are no words to describe this. It will enrage you.

http://www.gotquestions.org/shyness.html

Question: "What does the Bible say about shyness/being shy?"

Answer: Webster’s dictionary defines shyness as “the state of being timid, easily frightened, reserved, bashful, and shrinking from contact with others.†For the Christian, shyness can be overcome by relying on the Holy Spirit. The Bible explains this in 2 Timothy 1:7 (TLB): “For the Holy Spirit, God’s gift, does not want you to be afraid of people, but to be wise and strong, and to love them and enjoy being with them.†The Holy Spirit is given by God to those who place their faith in the sacrifice of Jesus Christ as payment for their personal sin. The real key is learning to be filled with, and under the control of, the Holy Spirit. Meditating on Ephesians 5:17-21, Ephesians 4:30, and Colossians 3:16 will be helpful to those who are struggling with shyness.

Oddly enough, shyness can actually be a form of pride. Fear of what people will think about us and being overly concerned for the opinions of men (Ephesians 6:6-7; Proverbs 29:25) can be reflection of obsession with self. But the Bible says we are not be worried about the opinions of men, not to fear what men think about us or even what they say about us if we’re doing what we know is right. In fact, if we are striving to live godly lives, we can expect not to be liked (2 Timothy 3:12).

Timidity, shyness and bashfulness are basically fear, and fear is the opposite of faith. We overcome fear through faith from God (Hebrews 11:6) and love from God (1 John 4:18-19). Faith and love from God come from saturating the heart, mind, and life with the Scriptures (Colossians 3:16; Romans 10:17). For sanctifying ourselves (John 17:17) and overcoming fear, doubt and confusion, the power of the Word of God is unequaled (Psalm 19; 2 Timothy 3:16-17).

Besides becoming a Christian, learning to live under the control of the Holy Spirit, replacing fear and pride with faith and love from God, and saturating our minds with Scripture, we can add one more ingredient to overcoming shyness. The world calls it “self esteem†and “self-image,†but those are not biblical terms. The Bible explains it as living out the identity of who we are in Christ. Meditating through Ephesians 1, we see all that we are in Christ. Shyness is about us, but true Life is about Christ, who is our Life according to Colossians 3:4.

When fear or self-consciousness keeps us from reaching out to other people, that is a reflection of self-centeredness and pride. Starting a conversation and showing interest in others can be an expression of genuine love. When we’re filled with God’s power and motivated by love, we’ll be able to reach out to others in a way that makes them feel appreciated. Then the emphasis is on others instead of on ourselves, and we can begin to live in freedom, self-sacrifice and love for others.

TL;DR: Shyness is a form of pride, therefore a sin, and is fear, which is the opposite of faith. :pink-shock: :pink-shock: :shock: :shock:

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What you said about them being taught being reserved and shy is a sin may have some truth to it.

I have a friend who grew up probably how we would describe here as fundielite and she was taught at her Christian school and church that being shy was a sin.

The pastor actually said being shy was not submitting to God's will because it prevented them from sharing the word.

This must be how we end up with Animated Mannequins for Jesus -- like the Mallys.

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Does Jana have any interests? The doula thing doesn't count since that's just an excuse to chaperone Jill without inviting more public criticism. I'm not being snarky at all with this question, I'm genuinely curious because I don't think she's ever publicly stated an interest in anything other than family stuff. Jill has midwifery, Jinger photography, Jessa does the packing :roll: and homeschooling and is into hair and makeup. What does Janna like? What does she do that's just her thing to occupy whatever free time she might have? Maybe she doesn't want to get married--that would be awesome, actually--but after her siblings are independent enough what will she do?

In one of the books, she said she loves volunteering at an local orphanage..

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I also think Jana is in an relationship based on her coy looks in the show interviews. I think the past reports/rumors have been true about her preference to be mostly off the show and thus we haven't seen much of it. She may not be courting (or may not have been during filming) but perhaps developing a relationship with a young man.

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I was raised in pretty mainstream Christianity, but I still was taught that shyness was not good. Being shy or quiet was self-conscious, self-centered, and proud. Instead of being shy, I was taught to think about others and focus my attention on others and get my mind off of myself. In other words, no introverts allowed.

I still feel guilty for preferring to be by myself. I can only imagine how much worse it would be in fundieland.

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I've said this before, but here goes again.....

The young men working at ATI HQ aren't allowed to court or marry til their time is up. I don't know if this applies to the young women who lead Journeys to the Heart, but it could well.

I have long thought it likely that Jana has a "special friend" at HQ but that they can't formally court til he, and maybe she as well, has served his time.

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Awwwwwwww I feel bad for shy fundie kids, they get the worst of it. Especially shy Duggar kids, they are forced into social interaction way more often than other fundies, as they have to constantly be friendly to people they have never met who are a bit obsessive over them.

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I was a really shy kid and my mother was told it was a sin and she needed to correct me. Thankfully she had good sense and said how can it be a sin if that's her personality from birth. She left that church and moved to another one. Calvinists, bah.

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In one of the books, she said she loves volunteering at an local orphanage..

:? There are still orphanages in this country? I know there are group homes for the extreme cases who can't be in foster homes (fire starters, etc.), but actual orphanages?

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There is an orphanage in the town where my mother lives and also a home for unwed mothers. I hadn't seen such a thing in decades until she moved there and we visited.

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:? There are still orphanages in this country? I know there are group homes for the extreme cases who can't be in foster homes (fire starters, etc.), but actual orphanages?

We have two "children's" homes here. (two that I know of) And it is sad. These kids are waiting for someone to adopt them. We donated some toys for christmas this past year and we got a lovely thank you note. It had a picture of these wishing star things the kids made with their wishes on it. These children - who are only a few years older than my own - are wishing for families instead of toys. It's heartbreaking. If I weren't a single parent barely making ends meet as it is, I would take them in a heart beat. Children are left there bc their parents can't (or - in some cases that I know personally - won't) take of them. The state doesn't take them away; the parents take them there. It's very sad.

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We have two "children's" homes here. (two that I know of) And it is sad. These kids are waiting for someone to adopt them. We donated some toys for christmas this past year and we got a lovely thank you note. It had a picture of these wishing star things the kids made with their wishes on it. These children - who are only a few years older than my own - are wishing for families instead of toys. It's heartbreaking. If I weren't a single parent barely making ends meet as it is, I would take them in a heart beat. Children are left there bc their parents can't (or - in some cases that I know personally - won't) take of them. The state doesn't take them away; the parents take them there. It's very sad.

God, that's horrible. Those poor children.
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