Duggar Weddings & Receptions

[nausicaa]

That's a possibility since the engagement is relatively short, so there really isn't time for a lot of alterations to make a dress modest enough for a fundie wedding.

I've always wondered why fundies don't do this more often. There are tons of really nice looking, really modest orthodox dresses. Heck, there's even a lot of Mormon wedding dresses that are very stylish and avoid the whole satin tee-shirt sewn to a tulle skirt design. My friend is Mormon and her wedding dress was a gorgeous, super modest Grace Kelly style dress with 3/4 sleeves and an A-line skirt, and she just bought it at a regular wedding shop in Salt Lake City. And dresses that were built to be modest fit and flow so much nicer than strapless dresses with some cap sleeves and a back tacked on (and take less time to be finished).

I"m wondering if the reliance on the old tee-shirt trope is because not only do the women have to be modest, they have to conform. Sticking out or being creative is looked down on. I also wonder how many have just had creativity beaten out of them.

[blisterine]

I am sure the Duggar's will serve at least sandwiches of some sort or even Bar-b-que if they want to have a down to earth southern wedding.

...Tater Tot Casserole, as far as the eye can see...

I went to an alcohol free, no dancing wedding that I realize was probably a fundie wedding because the bride's gown went up to her chin, like a sparkly rhinestone and taffeta turtleneck. They had a mashed potato bar, with a scoop of mashed potatoes in a real martini glass and a long bar of toppings like cheese, bacon, green onion, etc. Totally ridiculous! Imagine how much fun it was cleaning dried on mashed potato off 400 glasses!

His parents rented the garage of the house across the street and we had to leave the reception to get any kind of alcohol. That's where the real party was held!

[snuggles911]

I've always wondered why fundies don't do this more often. There are tons of really nice looking, really modest orthodox dresses. Heck, there's even a lot of Mormon wedding dresses that are very stylish and avoid the whole satin tee-shirt sewn to a tulle skirt design. My friend is Mormon and her wedding dress was a gorgeous, super modest Grace Kelly style dress with 3/4 sleeves and an A-line skirt, and she just bought it at a regular wedding shop in Salt Lake City. And dresses that were built to be modest fit and flow so much nicer than strapless dresses with some cap sleeves and a back tacked on (and take less time to be finished).

I"m wondering if the reliance on the old tee-shirt trope is because not only do the women have to be modest, they have to conform. Sticking out or being creative is looked down on. I also wonder how many have just had creativity beaten out of them.

I've wondered about this myself. My super fundie cousin had a gorgeous dress when she got married last year.

She found it online through a website that only sells modest gowns, totallymodest.com. It had a portrait neckline with beautiful detailing, lacy cap sleeves, a fitted bodice with fully covered back and an a-line skirt. It also had a sparkly belt to show off her waistline. It was simple and covered everything from her collarbone to her ankles, but wasn't frumpy in the least.

I have a feeling Jill will wear a lovely dress. I wonder what she'll do with her hair. I can picture her looking pretty wearing it in a loose, messy chignon with real flowers.

As far as reception food is concerned, I'm sure the Duggers will go the typical fundie route of tea-sized tuna and ham and cheese sandwich coupled with lots of cute appetizers and dips. There will probably be the ever-present non-alcoholic pink punch with orange sherbet and a big cake along with cookies or cupcakes for the ankle biters.

[Rebelwife]

I've always wondered why fundies don't do this more often. There are tons of really nice looking, really modest orthodox dresses. Heck, there's even a lot of Mormon wedding dresses that are very stylish and avoid the whole satin tee-shirt sewn to a tulle skirt design. My friend is Mormon and her wedding dress was a gorgeous, super modest Grace Kelly style dress with 3/4 sleeves and an A-line skirt, and she just bought it at a regular wedding shop in Salt Lake City. And dresses that were built to be modest fit and flow so much nicer than strapless dresses with some cap sleeves and a back tacked on (and take less time to be finished).

I"m wondering if the reliance on the old tee-shirt trope is because not only do the women have to be modest, they have to conform. Sticking out or being creative is looked down on. I also wonder how many have just had creativity beaten out of them.

I feel like in a way it is more of that "speshul snowflake" syndrome. If you just buy a modest wedding dress people will say how lovely you look. If you buy a strapless dress and add a satin t-shirt everyone can talk about how modest you are compared to all the heathens who get married half-naked.

[IReallyAmHopewell]

Derick should be starting to plan how to leave the wedding without a trashed car.

My thinking is that each time that was filmed, then the cameras stopped and they went on their way in a second vehicle...... Its all so phony.

[church_of_dog]

I feel like in a way it is more of that "speshul snowflake" syndrome. If you just buy a modest wedding dress people will say how lovely you look. If you buy a strapless dress and add a satin t-shirt everyone can talk about how modest you are compared to all the heathens who get married half-naked.

Ah, I think you've hit on it -- it's not about simply being modest, but about making a point of showing how very different their idea of modesty from the mainstream heathens. It's not the modesty that matters, it's the degree of change.

See how much we had to alter? All of *that* was uncovered on this evil satan's dress, but we've redeemed it -- and we want you to be impressed with how many yards of fabric it took to do that!

[ljohnson2006]

I hope the best man doesn't lose the ring.

[itsnotmeitsu]

Good, Jill! Get something pretty. Jill has blossomed since meeting Derek (spelling?). She needs something beautiful.

[freethemall]

I feel like in a way it is more of that "speshul snowflake" syndrome. If you just buy a modest wedding dress people will say how lovely you look. If you buy a strapless dress and add a satin t-shirt everyone can talk about how modest you are compared to all the heathens who get married half-naked.

THIS. I totally believe that faced with an already "modest" dress next to one that has the obvious modest alterations on it, they'd go for the latter so they could go on and on and on about what they had to do to make it acceptable and showing their "godly countenance" instead of their sinful collarbones.

I just hope Anna's dress isn't about to get a 3rd use (I doubt it).

Also, gross voyeuristic thought I'm wondering: do fundies wear lingerie? Or at least for their wedding night? I assume a lot of them may be too uncomfortable to get anywhere close to naked.

[HereticHick]

Wedding dress martyrdom!

[Burpies]

I would guess somewhere in the neighborhood of 1000, if Erin Bates' wedding is any indication. However, they don't feed everyone a full meal at most of these fundie weddings, and they don't have dancing, so the expense of a dance floor/band/DJ, so both those factors cut down on costs dramatically.

I've heard fundie weddings don't have dancing, but I can't, for the life of me picture in my head a wedding with no dancing! No couple's first dance as a married couple, no father & daughter dance, no mother & son dance, no bridal party dancing into the reception and no dj announcing the bride and groom for the first time. I just can't picture it.

[infooverload]

Can fundies have outdoor weddings? I was just wondering since the Duggar's property is large enough to have the wedding and reception on.

[DGayle]

They'll probably use pickles like Erin Bates

I can understand families without a lot of money going really easy, but the Duggars are rich, and they'll be paid a lot of money for this to be filmed. I think it's the height of stinginess not to give all those families who will be traveling at least one full meal. The Duggars can easily afford it. I don't think the Bates could, but the Duggars can!

[DGayle]

They had a mashed potato bar, with a scoop of mashed potatoes in a real martini glass and a long bar of toppings like cheese, bacon, green onion, etc. Totally ridiculous! Imagine how much fun it was cleaning dried on mashed potato off 400 glasses!

On the other hand, imagine how fun this will be when I do it for dinner one of these days! For a night at home, this will be fun!

I hope there were tubs of water for the used glasses to go in so the potatoes wouldn't dry.

[DGayle]

Also, gross voyeuristic thought I'm wondering: do fundies wear lingerie? Or at least for their wedding night? I assume a lot of them may be too uncomfortable to get anywhere close to naked.

I've wondered this too, and I've come to the conclusion that probably not. Since Jesus is a part of everything, Jesus is a part of sex. It's all threesomes. Sex is for making arrows for Jesus, and lingerie is for the husband! So lingerie must be sinful.

[DGayle]

I've heard fundie weddings don't have dancing, but I can't, for the life of me picture in my head a wedding with no dancing! No couple's first dance as a married couple, no father & daughter dance, no mother & son dance, no bridal party dancing into the reception and no dj announcing the bride and groom for the first time. I just can't picture it.

Our venue's dance permit was up for renewal, and the used some new stuff on the floor that ended up getting the permit delayed. My wedding couldn't have dancing. We did have plenty of alcohol though, making it a long cocktail hour that ended up being a lot of fun, and a lot of lasting friendships were made among our guests.

[ViolaSebastian]

I've wondered this too, and I've come to the conclusion that probably not. Since Jesus is a part of everything, Jesus is a part of sex. It's all threesomes. Sex is for making arrows for Jesus, and lingerie is for the husband! So lingerie must be sinful.

Although I read about a Christian lingerie company on FJ a few months ago, so some presumably do.

Who wants to go in on a lingerie gift for Jill? I'm thinking something leather or vinyl. :wink-kitty:

[16strong]

...Tater Tot Casserole, as far as the eye can see...

I went to an alcohol free, no dancing wedding that I realize was probably a fundie wedding because the bride's gown went up to her chin, like a sparkly rhinestone and taffeta turtleneck. They had a mashed potato bar, with a scoop of mashed potatoes in a real martini glass and a long bar of toppings like cheese, bacon, green onion, etc. Totally ridiculous! Imagine how much fun it was cleaning dried on mashed potato off 400 glasses!

His parents rented the garage of the house across the street and we had to leave the reception to get any kind of alcohol. That's where the real party was held!

Oh, but the mashed potato bar is a 'thing' at weddings these days. I kind of like it. But I'm also a bit of a potato fiend.

[singsingsing]

Oh my God, a mashed potato bar sounds AMAZING. I mean it would be even better with alcohol, but still.

[Mela99]

Oh my God, a mashed potato bar sounds AMAZING. I mean it would be even better with alcohol, but still.

I would take a mashed potato bar any day of the week. One wedding I went to once had a DESSERT BAR. There was cake and puie and ice cream and a variety of toppings... I HAD SO MUCH BREAD PUDDING.

[Megan]

I went to a wedding with a mashed potato bar recently. It was awesome (potatoes are among my favorite foods). A few different types of mashed potatoes (buttery, garlic, cheesy?) and toppings. The reception hall had a lot of people coming through to collect empty glasses and the like during cocktail hour, so I don't think there would have been too much difficulty cleaning the glasses out. Nothing sat long.

It was nice to have something a bit more substantial during cocktail hour than the traditional hors d'oeuvres.

Fundie weddings depress me. Minimal food, no alcohol, no dancing. I want tons of all three!

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

I went to a wedding with a mashed potato bar recently. It was awesome (potatoes are among my favorite foods). A few different types of mashed potatoes (buttery, garlic, cheesy?) and toppings. The reception hall had a lot of people coming through to collect empty glasses and the like during cocktail hour, so I don't think there would have been too much difficulty cleaning the glasses out. Nothing sat long.

It was nice to have something a bit more substantial during cocktail hour than the traditional hors d'oeuvres.

Fundie weddings depress me. Minimal food, no alcohol, no dancing. I want tons of all three!

My wedding (whenever I find a man) is going to be the exact opposite of a fundie wedding. Light on the ceremony (I've been informed that I must have one, but it doesn't have to be anything more than vows) and heavy on the party. All the money that would have gone to the ceremony, the dress, the flowers, etc will go to getting people drunk and having a blast. =)

[Miggy]

I've heard fundie weddings don't have dancing, but I can't, for the life of me picture in my head a wedding with no dancing! No couple's first dance as a married couple, no father & daughter dance, no mother & son dance, no bridal party dancing into the reception and no dj announcing the bride and groom for the first time. I just can't picture it.

I've never been to a wedding with dancing. I've been to garden party type weddings, beach weddings, formal sit down meals, casual church luncheons but none had dancing. (These range from full fundy to full atheist too!) I know a lot of people have dancing but it puzzles me why so many people seem to think it is essential.

Same with alcohol. If alcohol isn't part of your regular life, why would you have it at your wedding. My husband doesn't like the taste of alcoholic drinks and I can't drink with the medication I take. None of his family drink (various reasons) and my family are, at most, very light drinkers. Why would we have alcohol at our wedding? It didn't actually occur to us.

[Miggy]

Can fundies have outdoor weddings? I was just wondering since the Duggar's property is large enough to have the wedding and reception on.

I've been to fundy outdoor receptions but the wedding was always in a church.

[mausi]

A friend in the States got married last summer. She had a dry wedding and the DJ who plays at the local Middle School dances. She was quite upset that none of the formally attired adults at this reception got up and danced to Cotton Eye Joe (any of the five times it was repeatedly played during the 6-9 reception). It was a strange event for many reasons though (the bride's brothers reenacted the couples' relationship, in depth, for nearly 30 minutes; there was also an optional testimony circle).