Abigail Pregnant

[singsingsing]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure this is the first time she's ever explained what's actually going on with her CF carrier status. She has always made it sound like she and her husband are carriers and each of their children has a 1/4 chance of getting cystic fibrosis but she's bravely chosen to soldier on and accept the risk because Jesus. Unless she just found out about her gene being 'basically good to go' she's been, surprise surprise, exaggerating for effect all along.

[slickcat79]

Well this is interesting:

Hasn't she been saying for a while that her kids are high risk?

Is there such a thing as "really bad CF gene" and "weird CF gene mutation"? I always thought there was CF, not-CF, and CF carrier. Maybe I'm not really understanding what she's saying, but would a gene mutation even make her a carrier? Those are not necessarily passed on, right? :?

[docmom]

Is there such a thing as "really bad CF gene" and "weird CF gene mutation"? I always thought there was CF, not-CF, and CF carrier. Maybe I'm not really understanding what she's saying, but would a gene mutation even make her a carrier? Those are not necessarily passed on, right? :?

There are literally thousands of mutations that have been discovered in the CF gene. Some are clearly associated with development of disease others are not. What she probably means is that her husband has one of the "definite disease associated" mutations and she is carrying a random mutation in the gene that may or may not result in diseas but probably doesn't as she has no family history of it.

Also, it'd be a pretty rare OB nowadays who would be the least bit upset or surprised by a woman over the age of 35 being pregnant. My guess is that the OB said, "Abigail, love, you're over 35 now so officially you count as advanced maternal age and are at higher risk for genetic mutations. We can offer you screening and we do offer termination if desired if screening suggests a problem and that's what you wish to do" or words to that effect. At least, that's pretty much what my OB said to me for each of my pregnancies.

[Mama Mia]

Why would an ob get pissed if you get preg after 35? Why would an ob care if you refuse birth control at your 6 wk checkup? Some of those were really ridiculous.

My daughters O.B. Was extremely pushy and rude when she turned down birth control at her 8 week check up. She was really rude about it. I think it was a racist/ageist/classist thing, because being brown and in your early twenties with two kids apparently means you shouldn't get to decide if and when you want more. Never mind that she's married, has a good job and reacts horribly to hormonal birth control.

[Dysfundamental]

Sweet zombie Jesus, the book she has been working on is about poverty.

abigails-alcove.blogspot.com/2014/03/living-like-happy-graduate-student-with.html

Being broke, like a graduate student, is not the same as being poor. And it is certainly not the same as generational poverty.

Abigail has always had her parents as a safety net.

What an entitled idiot she is. I feel sorry for her kids.

[Oz1977]

My daughters O.B. Was extremely pushy and rude when she turned down birth control at her 8 week check up. She was really rude about it. I think it was a racist/ageist/classist thing, because being brown and in your early twenties with two kids apparently means you shouldn't get to decide if and when you want more. Never mind that she's married, has a good job and reacts horribly to hormonal birth control.

Ugh sorry about the rude OB....I had babies at 32 and 35 and at my 6 wk checkup I barely remember my midwife asking if I was thinking about taking BC pills. Only difference being pg at 35 was that I had to see a genetic counselor just incase there was an abnormality. I sure didn't feel advanced maternal age! 35 seems too young to be called that.

[anjulibai]

Ugh sorry about the rude OB....I had babies at 32 and 35 and at my 6 wk checkup I barely remember my midwife asking if I was thinking about taking BC pills. Only difference being pg at 35 was that I had to see a genetic counselor just incase there was an abnormality. I sure didn't feel advanced maternal age! 35 seems too young to be called that.

It's young in terms of life expectancy, but not in terms of fertility. Your risks of miscarriage, pregnancy complications, and various disorders increases quite a bit after 35.

It's not to say that there is anything wrong with it, and most OBs don't think twice about it. It just means they have to warn you of the higher risks so that you can watch out for symptoms and risk factors, and offer you additional tests.

My aunt had her first at the age of 40 and her second at 43. Her pregnancies were uneventful, but she was monitored more closely than I was at age 27 (she and I were pregnant with our firsts at the same time). She also had to have C-sections because her first was in the wrong position and my aunt's BC was, while normal, higher than they would have prefered.

[lagenialester]

It will be so weird if Baby Matthew is a girl....

[anjulibai]

It will be so weird if Baby Matthew is a girl....

I must admit, I'm really hoping it is.

[Stephanie66]

Apparently her book is about the joys of living in poverty with children (or some such thing.)

I got a little irritated when she said she racked up $85K in student loan debt and then got a job as a legal aid lawyer for $32K a year (fine) because she hated corporate law (fine) and then became a SAHM but DOES NOT MENTION that she BAILED on her student loans. NOT EVERYONE CAN DO THAT. So her "making it by the grace of God" is not entirely true. She is making it by the grace of the new laws of the Obama administration.

She also doesn't mention that her "poverty" includes help from her parents, a husband with health insurance, a house they own (not renting). These things are so huge.

Her advertising agency was also apparently comped with a free birthday party. Serious work there.

[chaotic life]

Her genetic explanation of CF is bullshit. If they test for it and found the mutation in her, it's because it's a KNOWN CF causing mutation. That it has not caused CF in her family is because it takes TWO mutations to make CF. IDIOT.

The 'really scare mutation' would almost assuredly be DF508, which is known as one of the six 'classic' mutations and the one most commonly associated with severe neonatal disease presentations. However, there are 1600 known mutations that cause CF and yes, her more nonsense mutation when paired with DF508 will most assuredly cause CF.

Furthermore, she is NOT looking at 'a few' more trips to Children's in DC. She is looking at when the child is at their healthiest having to go every three months, when they are sick having to go much more frequently and averaging two weeks out of every year of their life inpatient at the hospital. Nor is the average lifespan 35. The average projected median is 35. Abigail has a law degree and prides herself in being a teacher. Surely she knows the difference between a genuine mean and a projected median. They are not the same thing, and in this case, that number is very deceptive because of the outliers that contribute to create it belie the truth that half of all CFers in the US will not see their 18tth birthday and the other half will. That number has been artificially driven up by atypical CF, which mostly consist of patients that were previously referred to as a symptomatic carriers with one mutation, something any one of her own children might already display. Those with two mutations do not live to 35 in this country, rarely and often with the assistance of lung transplants.

She also fails to grasp the risk of neonatal health issues such as failure to thrive and meconium ileus and the reality that she will add approximately 2 HOURS of treatment time per day for this child she will so brazenly bring into this world with CF simply because it will only require a few extra trips to Children's in DC.

[Stephanie66]

People like Abigail also fail to grasp what kind of life they would be imposing on this child. A child with a "really bad" case of cystic fibrosis or Down Syndrome and heart defects (with an increased risk of childhood leukemia) into a self-described "chaotic household" with a mom with five other children who home-schools and a dad who has a long commute, in a family who occasionally insists upon living in poverty and has an iffy social network.

[Chowder Head]

People like Abigail also fail to grasp what kind of life they would be imposing on this child. A child with a "really bad" case of cystic fibrosis or Down Syndrome and heart defects (with an increased risk of childhood leukemia) into a self-described "chaotic household" with a mom with five other children who home-schools and a dad who has a long commute, in a family who occasionally insists upon living in poverty and has an iffy social network.

Not only this but how a sick child will affect the other children. Children that already have a chaotic life. :(

[So Many Lies]

I'm old, so people didn't test until they were at least a couple weeks late, and people I knew would usually tell people around 2 months, earlier for immediate family. I think the combination of the Internet and early testing has really pushed up when people announce, in general.

I had one second trimester loss, and I am about 90% certain I had 2 early miscarriages...extremely heavy, painful period a couple weeks late, vomiting ( always my first pregnancy sign )fatigue etc.

I think I would have been much more upset if I had known for sure I was pregnant. ( well, with one of them, the other I was 13, so a relief either way)

It is something more often seen among fundie bloggers than the general population I think. I notice the ones who post they are pregnant before the pee is even dry on the test are often the most unhinged.

Maybe it just goes with the over sharing culture on blogs or else they are very competitive with their contemporaries on the baby making front. I think it's the latter mostly .

Personally I'd leave it until the 12 week mark. Just because if something went wrong I wouldn't want to have to "un-tell" everyone.

[So Many Lies]

I must admit, I'm really hoping it is.

Mattheweena. Solved!

[anjulibai]

Mattheweena. Solved!

This made me curious what a feminine form of Matthew would be, and the only one I could find was Matea, which is Croatian. I could see Abigail going for that.

I do wonder how she'll react if it is a girl, though.

[So Many Lies]

My daughters O.B. Was extremely pushy and rude when she turned down birth control at her 8 week check up. She was really rude about it. I think it was a racist/ageist/classist thing, because being brown and in your early twenties with two kids apparentlyop means you shouldn't get to decide if and when you want more. Never mind that she's married, has a good job and reacts horribly to hormonal birth control.

Yeah I don't know the specifics but seems to me some these specialists have a weird attitude. I've been subject to it and there's nothing especially notable about my circumstances, age or appearance. I am partly Asian but so was the doc so it can't be that! It may not be the age or brown factor. I just think they want you to just agree with everything they say. Maybe it's the constant dealings with the Abigails of this world that has made them lose all bedside manner!!

[gilora]

Apparently her book is about the joys of living in poverty with children (or some such thing.)

I got a little irritated when she said she racked up $85K in student loan debt and then got a job as a legal aid lawyer for $32K a year (fine) because she hated corporate law (fine) and then became a SAHM but DOES NOT MENTION that she BAILED on her student loans. NOT EVERYONE CAN DO THAT. So her "making it by the grace of God" is not entirely true. She is making it by the grace of the new laws of the Obama administration.

She also doesn't mention that her "poverty" includes help from her parents, a husband with health insurance, a house they own (not renting). These things are so huge.

Her advertising agency was also apparently comped with a free birthday party. Serious work there.

How did she bail on her student loans? AFAIK student loans cannot be discharged in bankruptcy.

[Georgiana]

Yeah I don't know the specifics but seems to me some these specialists have a weird attitude. I've been subject to it and there's nothing especially notable about my circumstances, age or appearance. I am partly Asian but so was the doc so it can't be that! It may not be the age or brown factor. I just think they want you to just agree with everything they say. Maybe it's the constant dealings with the Abigails of this world that has made them lose all bedside manner!!

It goes the other way too. I had a nurse be rude to me when she found out I wasn't planning on going through with the pregnancy because I dressed in a way that showed I obviously had a decent amount of means. People make judgments on who should/shouldn't have kids, and it's become socially semi-acceptable to express them.

[So Many Lies]

^ That's very unprofessional.

[So Many Lies]

And it kind of reminds me of those wrongful birth lawsuits where women who looked "motherly" got less compensation that women who the judges deemed looked like less fit mothers. Ugh.

[Stephanie66]

She discussed her bailing on her student loans in her blog. Apparently, Obama set up a program that if you are poor enough for long enough, you are not obligated to pay them back. So as long as she doesn't go back to work and keeps popping out babies, she can bail out on her loans.

Somehow, I don't think that this is the spirit for which was intended. I think it was intended for graduates who for, whatever reason, are working but just can't get over the hump and earn enough to pay them back in full, not for people to get law degrees and then become stay at home moms and intentionally pop out kids.

[lilwriter85]

Apparently her book is about the joys of living in poverty with children (or some such thing.)

I got a little irritated when she said she racked up $85K in student loan debt and then got a job as a legal aid lawyer for $32K a year (fine) because she hated corporate law (fine) and then became a SAHM but DOES NOT MENTION that she BAILED on her student loans. NOT EVERYONE CAN DO THAT. So her "making it by the grace of God" is not entirely true. She is making it by the grace of the new laws of the Obama administration.

She also doesn't mention that her "poverty" includes help from her parents, a husband with health insurance, a house they own (not renting). These things are so huge.

Her advertising agency was also apparently comped with a free birthday party. Serious work there.

I just read the latest Abigail entries and I agree with everything you said about Abigail and poverty. She manages money poorly and her father is constantly bailing her out.

[So Many Lies]

She discussed her bailing on her student loans in her blog. Apparently, Obama set up a program that if you are poor enough for long enough, you are not obligated to pay them back. So as long as she doesn't go back to work and keeps popping out babies, she can bail out on her loans.

Somehow, I don't think that this is the spirit for which was intended. I think it was intended for graduates who for, whatever reason, are working but just can't get over the hump and earn enough to pay them back in full, not for people to get law degrees and then become stay at home moms and intentionally pop out kids.

I really despise Abigail's attitude.

I can see a scheme like that open to abuse a a tremendous scale. Say people who work in a family establishment.

Nonetheless I wish the scheme were available to me as I have student debts hanging over my head and my income has been atrocious since graduating! And not intentionally.

[gilora]

She discussed her bailing on her student loans in her blog. Apparently, Obama set up a program that if you are poor enough for long enough, you are not obligated to pay them back. So as long as she doesn't go back to work and keeps popping out babies, she can bail out on her loans.

Somehow, I don't think that this is the spirit for which was intended. I think it was intended for graduates who for, whatever reason, are working but just can't get over the hump and earn enough to pay them back in full, not for people to get law degrees and then become stay at home moms and intentionally pop out kids.

Thanks for explaining. One of the worst parts of this sad saga is that she probably thinks Obama is the anti- Christ.