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Duggars, Duggars Everywhere - general discussion Part 4


happy atheist

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Posted

Mullet gives advice on keeping your marriage sexy.

Posted
Mullet gives advice on keeping your marriage sexy.

Is the advice to fuck until your genitals drop off, in the name of putting another arrow in that quiver.

Posted

... whilst breathing "number twenty number twenty number twenty" under your breath to the sweet, sweet sound of Jimboob's frantic pelvic flailing.

Posted

I imagine them to be the kind of people who have obnoxiously loud sex because they want to let everyone know that they have sex. Especially Jimbob, he probably makes sure he makes the loudest noises that shake the windows and cause lasting trauma to the kids. For the whole minute he lasts.

Posted

^^^EEEEWWWWW! Didn't need that image in my head, thank you!

Posted

I need some brain bleach and a Phenergan.

Posted

Please-- not on Valentine's Day!!!

Posted
Please-- not on Valentine's Day!!!

On Valentines Day, Michelle and Jimbob probably see the kids even less than they normally do. They spend the whole day in the bedroom humping loudly while embarrassed Jslaves try to make up excuses for the kids about what the noise is.

"I hear the springs on the bed bouncing. Jill, why are Mommy and Daddy jumping on the bed shouting "Oh God, Yes! Now give me number 20!""

"Erm.....well.....Mommy and Daddy are praying for a new brother or sister for us, but they are jumping to get extra close to Heaven so God hears them better"

Posted

This might sound weird...

How embarrassing would it actually be to someone who heard it almost every day their whole lives? Does it only get embarrassing once they get old enough to realize what's going on, or would it be such a normal thing in that household that nobody would even think about what might be going on... Especially as sheltered as they are/were.

Posted
This might sound weird...

How embarrassing would it actually be to someone who heard it almost every day their whole lives? Does it only get embarrassing once they get old enough to realize what's going on, or would it be such a normal thing in that household that nobody would even think about what might be going on... Especially as sheltered as they are/were.

Where is their bedroom located in the house? You would think they would like to be as far away as possible from whiny toddlers at night. Maybe they have thick walls.. I hope..

Posted

Where is their bedroom located in the house? You would think they would like to be as far away as possible from whiny toddlers at night. Maybe they have thick walls.. I hope..

I think they are near the girls' room.

Posted

I feel like because of this thread people are going to pop up a few months from now insisting that we KNOW that Michelle and Jim Bob have loud crazy sex so their kids can hear them. All I'll say is, I'd bet a lot of money that they don't. And I feel gross talking about it, so that's all. :lol:

Posted

I think fundies come in two flavours when it comes to sex. The kind that does it nearly fully clothed, with the lights off, through a hole in the sheet, while praying, and the kind that get a kick out of spanking eachother and have fantasies of extra modest bondage gear (like a leather frumper, lol)

Posted

Their room is near the girls, but thankfully the prayer closet is in between the bedrooms. Hopefully it serves as a buffer for any potential noise.

Sex is one of my favorite fundy hypocrisies. Like its modesty! Modesty! And then as soon as they are married they are all over each other and in your face about their physical relationship. Reread

Also muchelles advice is that you should always be ready to answer to his call.....its creepy misogynist bullshit

Posted

I wish the article (I read the one on the Duggar Family Blog) had specifically told men to be considerate of their wives. I don't think any woman should feel obligated outside of one week a month and for a specific number of days after the birth of a baby, which some of the men reading the article might not agree with anyway.

Posted

If I as so much as make a joking reference to sex my kids they tell me to shut up. LOL LOL

I can only imagine how the Duggar kids feel about their parents excessive need to talk about sex.

Posted

i bet all of the kids know when they were conceived. Boob proudly announced that Josie was conceived on Fathers Day. Why does he think we care?

Posted
i bet all of the kids know when they were conceived. Boob proudly announced that Josie was conceived on Fathers Day. Why does he think we care?

If he knows the exact day on which she was conceived, I'm betting they don't have nearly as much sweet fellowship as they want us to think.

Posted
Their room is near the girls, but thankfully the prayer closet is in between the bedrooms. Hopefully it serves as a buffer for any potential noise.

Lovely. So when one of the teenagers (or adults) gets defrauded and needs to pray away the 'unholy' urges, they just might overhear their parents making babies on the other side of the wall. There is no escape from the madness in this house.

Posted

The date of conception of all of the kids is probably taught at the SOTDRT.

At this point, Michelle can probably feel the exact moment that one of Jimbob's sperm meets her egg.

Posted
The date of conception of all of the kids is probably taught at the SOTDRT.

At this point, Michelle can probably feel the exact moment that one of Jimbob's sperm meets her egg.

Yes because she may not feel the sex act and sleeps through it.

Posted

If he knows the exact day on which she was conceived, I'm betting they don't have nearly as much sweet fellowship as they want us to think.

Either that, or they are actively trying to conceive as opposed to leaving it up to God (which we all knew anyway). Many couples can tell you exactly when they conceived....because they're actively tracking their cycles and trying to get pregnant. If they were truly leaving it up to God, they wouldn't know the exact date of conception.

Posted

Well, in all fairness, EVERY day at the Duggar's hizzle is "Father's Day."

Posted

I think the younger kids should give the older ones cards on Mothers Day and Father's Day.

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