Candace Cameron Bure on submissiveness

[Rescinded and Mended]

What happened exactly? Was Kirk the first fundie in the family? How old were he and Candace?

And about her weight, I also never thought of her as chubby, and I thought she was the prettiest of the girls.

Jodie Sweetin has struggled with an addiction to Crystal Meth. Kirk Supposedly had his religious epiphany around the age of 17 and used it to bully and harass other cast members and staff on the show. Then there was that whole scandal about how he had the actress who played the Seaver family nanny fired from the show after 7 episodes because he found out she had posed for Playboy.

[lilwriter85]

Julie McCullough who played the nanny and Kirk's love interest still has beef with Kirk due to her firing.

[nellautumngirl]

The history of how they became "convicted" was discussed on this thread, based on an interview with Candace that I listened to:

http://freejinger.org/forums/viewtopic. ... 0&start=20

Thanks!

[FloraKitty35]

Doug Phillips is a Tool's daddy's Constitution Party, I imagine.

They'd throw their vote to the nearest 3rd party whack job first.

[thoughtful]

Thanks!

You're welcome! Have a barf bucket handy.

[scc12]

Jodie Sweetin has struggled with an addiction to Crystal Meth. Kirk Supposedly had his religious epiphany around the age of 17 and used it to bully and harass other cast members and staff on the show. Then there was that whole scandal about how he had the actress who played the Seaver family nanny fired from the show after 7 episodes because he found out she had posed for Playboy.

I'm glad Jodie got off of it before she developed an awful meth face.she is so pretty.

[debrand]

The President has a Cabinet whose members advise him. Yeah, the final decision rests with him, but the advisers have a LOT to say.

We do not have a dictatorship in our government. The three branches of the government are supposed to balance one another, so the quote about not having two heads of authority fail for multiple reasons. However, the biggest reason that these kind of quotes fail is because marriage is not like running a government or being in the military.

[Mela99]

Jezebel put out an article on what happened to the Full House girls. Not sure how new it is, but seems relevant.

jezebel.com/how-the-full-house-girls-grew-into-full-house-women-1497341919?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

[Cleopatra7]

The Olsen twins may be worth more than everyone on this board combined, but they've had their share of problems (e.g., eating disorders, substance abuse, family turmoil). They look like Gothic Lolita dolls. I know they can't help being small and wan to a certain extent, but whenever I see them, I'm reminded of those exposes about twelve year-old girls who get sold into sex slavery in Cambodia.

[Rescinded and Mended]

Jezebel put out an article on what happened to the Full House girls. Not sure how new it is, but seems relevant.

jezebel.com/how-the-full-house-girls-grew-into-full-house-women-1497341919?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

According to Candace in the article:

"I am not a passive person, but I chose to fall into a more submissive role in our relationship because I wanted to do everything in my power to make my marriage work."

Translation: My husband is a domineering bastard who won't treat me with respect, but instead of asserting myself and insisting that I be treated like an equal and with respect, I let him run the show because I was raised fundie-lite. If I choose to walk away to get a divorce, my family will shun me for not keeping it sweet.

[rural juror]

I think if someone chooses to play a submissive role in her/his relationship, that's completely fine, as long as they don't push those views on others. I think there are people who naturally prefer to be submissive without being forced into it. If they start claiming their way is the right way, however, there is a problem.

[Full enough quiver]

I think if someone chooses to play a submissive role in her/his relationship, that's completely fine, as long as they don't push those views on others. I think there are people who naturally prefer to be submissive without being forced into it. If they start claiming their way is the right way, however, there is a problem.

I completely agree. I tend to take a submissive role in my marriage. That works for my husband's and my natural personalities. I wouldn't dream of telling anyone else how they should do marriage, which is unique to every couple. I certainly wouldn't want to see any woman (or man) go against their natural inclination, as it sounds like Candace has done, to fit some arbitrary ideal of what marriage should look like. You be you, and I'll be me, and everyone can be happy in the marriage that works for them.

[formergothardite]

According to Candace in the article:

"I am not a passive person, but I chose to fall into a more submissive role in our relationship because I wanted to do everything in my power to make my marriage work."

Translation: My husband is a domineering bastard who won't treat me with respect, but instead of asserting myself and insisting that I be treated like an equal and with respect, I let him run the show because I was raised fundie-lite. If I choose to walk away to get a divorce, my family will shun me for not keeping it sweet.

I bet her husband treated her like crap when she stood up for herself so she adapted her behavior so she can avoid confrontation and then justifies it with religion. It sounds better to say "God wants me to be submissive" instead of "I don't want my husband to get angry at me so I just stopped asserting any opinion or trying to make any decision."

[lilwriter85]

No surprise that Lori blogged about this.

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2014/01/wifely-submission-is-front-page-news.html

When the citizens of a country submit to and obey the laws of the land instituted by the government, there is peace and happiness. When a child submits to and obeys his parents, there is harmony in the home. When students submit to and obey their teacher, there is joy and unity in the classroom. When employees submit to and obey their employer, the work gets done. However, when a wife submits to and obeys her husband, she makes front news headlines.

When citizens submit to their government, a child to his parents, students to their teacher and employees to their employer, no one worries that the government, parents, teacher or employer will lord it over those submitted to them and use them as a doormat. Oh, but when a wife says she is submitted to and obeys her husband, everyone thinks she must be "lorded over" and being used as a doormat.

Why is this? Why is it required and even desired for citizens, children, students and employees to submit to those who are their leaders but not wives? Why is it so terrible when a wife wants to submit to and obey her husband and enjoy peace and harmony in her home?

Every institution needs a leader or there will most likely be chaos, arguing, and unhappiness. God is a God of order. When there is a designated leader in anything and those under the leader happily and willingly obey the leader, peace reigns.

I am not talking about "blind obedience" here either. If any of those who are designated leaders ask you to sin, you must obey God rather than man but the Bible tells us to submit to and obey our government {even when they are corrupt}, our parents when we are children, our elders over us in the church, and our employers. It is also very clear that wives are to submit to and obey their husbands also.

It doesn't mean those under the leader are any less than their leader. This is a foolish argument. Parents are no better than their children. They just have different roles which when followed, lead to peace and harmony.

So when we hear of Candace Cameron-Bure and Gabrielle Reece say they are submissive to their husbands and it makes front page news, let's cheer them on for their boldness in saying so. Let's submit to and obey our husbands and show the world that it is good. It is God's ordained order and His ways are best.

[Full enough quiver]

Let me get this straight. Citizens should submit to their government even if it is corrupt. It says so in the bible. So, fundies need to quit bitching about obamacare and suck it up according to their own holy book. This may be the first time I'm agreeing with something Lori says.

[Childless]

The problem with fundies (and even those who are fundie-lite) is that they think everyone should be crammed into the same little box. All women should act/dress/be the same, all men should act/dress/be the same and all marriages should look/work the same. I've yet to meet two people who are exactly alike, so why they think everyone's marriage/life should be the same is beyond me. My marriage works wonderfully. For me. I would never think to tell someone their marriage is lacking because they aren't doing exactly what I'm doing in my marriage. I could give a rat's ass if Candace wants to be submissive in her marriage. If that works for her and her husband, all the more power to them. What I do have a problem with is her insistence that the woman being submissive creates the best marriage. That is inherently wrong. If I were to be submissive, my marriage would fall apart. I would be miserable because its not who I am and my husband would be miserable because he does not want a submissive wife. If he did, he would not have married me. With the exception of the advice to keep communication open between you and your spouse, I pretty much ignore anyone trying to pedal marriage advice. It's usually worthless.

[Rescinded and Mended]

I bet her husband treated her like crap when she stood up for herself so she adapted her behavior so she can avoid confrontation and then justifies it with religion. It sounds better to say "God wants me to be submissive" instead of "I don't want my husband to get angry at me so I just stopped asserting any opinion or trying to make any decision."

This is how she sounded to me, as well. I can't speak for everyone who is the more passive party of the two in a marriage, but from what I've seen, it appears to be a formula for exploitation and potential abuse. I have at least two friends who failed to assert themselves early on in their marriages. One is now divorced because she took stock of her life in her fifties and decided she didn't want to be controlled anymore (better late than never!), and the other is in her thirties and still married, but won't stick up for herself, so her husband runs over her and alienates all her friends and family. Neither of these women are fundie, either.

The happiest longterm marriages I've seen are the ones where both parties occasionally put the brakes on and call each other out on their faults or other issues in the interest of working toward a compromise.

[cindyluvs24]

Does Candace's husband actually believe he is some kind of genius who must forever be obeyed? Hey dude. You play hockey. You skate very fast with a stick. Get over yourself.

[dawbs]

slate touched on it now too: http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/ ... t_all.html

(not breaking because, slate.)

[Rescinded and Mended]

I love this part of the article:

"After sharing a supposedly charming anecdote about how her future husband fought to have his name listed first on their wedding thank-you cards because “he was the man of house,†she writes: My husband is a natural-born leader. I quickly learned that I had to find a way of honoring his take-charge personality and not get frustrated about his desire to have the final decision on just about everything. I am not a passive person, but I chose to fall into a more submissive role in our relationship because I wanted to do everything in my power to make my marriage and family work. ... I submit to his leadership."

So her entire attitude regarding the manner in which she allows herself to be treated in her marriage resulted from what was ultimately a pissing contest that she let her husband win. Brilliant.

And then there's this gem:

"When the interviewer asked if she allows her husband to make the final choice even “at the detriment of your family,†she said yes, but emphasized that her husband takes her opinion seriously and she trusts him completely."

To Candace - you teach people how to treat you. Allowing your husband to dominate you isn't wise or Godly in any way. It just means that you feel you are unworthy of respect, and refuse to assert yourself because of it. Moreover, you are teaching your daughters to believe the same way, pretty much guaranteeing the potential for abuse when they grow up and have adult relationships of their own. Think back on your own choices when as they grow and are finding their way in the world.

[scc12]

that was well-said,homeskool hero.

when I was I counseling,I took a test that showed the difference bet. what I wanted and what I was actually getting out of marriage.I was shocked at the difference.It was on a graph,and there were 2 lines of greatly different lengths.

I learned how to assert myself and get what I wanted out of it,too.Candace really needs that kind of counseling,imo.Little things like whether your name is 1st or not are just plain petty.Most men could care less.imo it shows a huge lack of self-esteem on his part.HE needs some counseling as well.

[JMarie]

So, I did a little Googling about Candace's brother Kirk and the role he played on Growing Pains. Tracey Gold, who played his sister Carol, was the butt of many fat jokes in the script for two seasons. She was never significantly overweight, but it affected her mentally to such a degree that she became anorexic. Tracey dropped to such an alarmingly low weight that she had to leave the show and get treatment. She returned to the show for its last two episodes, but was still sick and in need of more therapy.

Considering the amount of creative control Kirk Cameron had over the show at the time of Tracey's troubles, it makes me wonder how much influence he had over the script and if he was perfectly okay with fat-shaming Tracey. I'm sure other factors were involved, but it's clear she suffered during her time on the show.

Tracey had been anorexic before the show started.

http://www.biography.com/people/tracey-gold-585036

[greek_chorus]

So Candace Cameron Bure was on Rachel Ray this morning and Rachael starts telling Candace how she's submissive in her marriage because she likes to treat her husband like a big, strong man and makes dinner for him every night. I think I may go puke now. I wish someone would buy Rachael a dictionary because cooking dinner for your husband doesn't make you submissive, especially since Candace said her husband cooks dinner in their house. It's sad that Rachael has given this crazy belief system more air time and validation than it deserves just because she was once Full House fan.

[kpmom]

So Candace Cameron Bure was on Rachel Ray this morning and Rachael starts telling Candace how she's submissive in her marriage because she likes to treat her husband like a big, strong man and makes dinner for him every night. I think I may go puke now. I wish someone would buy Rachael a dictionary because cooking dinner for your husband doesn't make you submissive, especially since Candace said her husband cooks dinner in their house. It's sad that Rachael has given this crazy belief system more air time and validation than it deserves just because she was once Full House fan.

It's interesting how women like Candace, Rachel, and Gabrielle Reece, who were famous and independent before the men in their lives came along, have now decided "submissive" is the way to go.

I wonder why that is? Did they marry men who can't handle having famous wives who have money of their own?

[NotALoserLikeYou]

What, only submissive women cook dinner? Does Rachel think that non submissive women can't nurture or love people?