Lazy Lyndsie of 'A love worth waiting for' is back! (Merged)

[Aggie2145]

I so hate it when people spout off the crap about how an adoption was in God's plan all along. If they would just stop and think for a second they would realize that if that were true it means God is using unsuspecting women as unwilling surrogates to have babies for them (them almost always being straight, white, Christian couples), or at the least God is using someone's pain and anguish to make them happy, and that makes God the biggest asshole of all. They dismiss not only the birth parent's rolls and feeling, but also that crap serves to make the children feel like they should be grateful or feel lucky when they lost so much too. Sure they have gained a mother and father, but they also lost a mother and father. Such arrogant, entitled assholes, the lot of them.

I totally agree - especially when it is said in front of the children. What they hear is: God wanted me to suffer until I found my new family. The next logical thought is: I better be good or God will punish me again. That almost rises to the level of emotional abuse....and for children who have had their foundations shaken, it does not take much.

I have several friends who decided to pursue domestic adoption instead of IVF and they are very careful not to ever verbalize such thoughts. Yes, perhaps their plan was to conceive children on their own, but when nature dictated otherwise, their plan to have children only changed slightly.

[bionicmlle]

What made you think that? I agree btw.

I'm not sure what made me think that, it was just my gut reaction to her post with vague references to difficult changes, decisions to make, etc.

[lilwriter85]

Sometime before she closed her first blog, Lyndsie said something on the blog about still having cancer cells in her body. That was three years ago. I just read the posting from a few of days ago and she mentions the changes that have gone on in their lives. She mentions that they are eating mostly organic and they no longer eat out. That might be due to health problems or they just decided to change their eating habits. I find it a bit interesting that they joined a church right after they got the little girl. I recall that they had been attending a home church at Daniel's parents' home. I wonder if there was some problems there.

[WonderingInWA]

Sometime before she closed her first blog, Lyndsie said something on the blog about still having cancer cells in her body. That was three years ago. I just read the posting from a few of days ago and she mentions the changes that have gone on in their lives. She mentions that they are eating mostly organic and they no longer eat out. That might be due to health problems or they just decided to change their eating habits. I find it a bit interesting that they joined a church right after they got the little girl. I recall that they had been attending a home church at Daniel's parents' home. I wonder if there was some problems there.

What's most disappointing about them not eating out anymore is there will be no more photos of them at the restaurants. Hopefully they'll still entertain us with the endless car selfies!

[lilwriter85]

I remember some of their restaurant pics and one of them where they looked dorky at Burger King. I think there will ve some car selfies and of course Lynsdie/Aubrey selfies. I'm curious if they will adopt again. I think their close friends and relatives are all fundie. I remember one of Daniel's brothers had four or five kids. Also a few of Daniel's younger siblings were performing in a gospel group. I can't remember the group name, but I remember Lyndsie was acting at their booking agent.

[salex]

I so hate it when people spout off the crap about how an adoption was in God's plan all along. If they would just stop and think for a second they would realize that if that were true it means God is using unsuspecting women as unwilling surrogates to have babies for them (them almost always being straight, white, Christian couples), or at the least God is using someone's pain and anguish to make them happy, and that makes God the biggest asshole of all. They dismiss not only the birth parent's rolls and feeling, but also that crap serves to make the children feel like they should be grateful or feel lucky when they lost so much too. Sure they have gained a mother and father, but they also lost a mother and father. Such arrogant, entitled assholes, the lot of them.

We were in an adult sunday school class when some older woman piped up about "god works in mysterious ways" since some family there in the church had adopted after infertility, miscarriagea and stillborn of the one pregnancy they carried to term--apparently their baby's ashes were buried in the church garden. And wasn't it wonderful that they had all those losses so that now they could realize they needed to adopt.

While she didn't know it, I had lost what turned out to be my only pregnancy less than a year before. I left the classroom and ended up weeping the the bathroom. I told hubs that maybe it would have been a little better if god wanted them to adopt to just "lay it on their hearts" instead of killing their newborns.

Hmm, I think I still sound bitter.....

[LilMissMetaphor]

They dismiss not only the birth parent's rolls

Hey, it's a good thing if they don't care whether the birth parents are fat!

Sorry. Couldn't help myself. Continue.

[Feberin]

I understand the first half of this comment but not the second. "typical wealthy white americans only looking for white babies" sure, this is a typical scenario in adoption agencies across the country. But why rag on domestic adoption? If it was to spur a response, I totally get it. At least in my mind, domestic adoptions have huge benefits for both the children and the parents.

I don't have any issue with domestic adoption. I'm mostly just happy about the comment because I feel like it kind of put Lyndsie on the spot. I'm honestly amazed she allowed the comment and then responded to it instead of just deleting it.

[WonderingInWA]

I remember some of their restaurant pics and one of them where they looked dorky at Burger King. I think there will ve some car selfies and of course Lynsdie/Aubrey selfies. I'm curious if they will adopt again. I think their close friends and relatives are all fundie. I remember one of Daniel's brothers had four or five kids. Also a few of Daniel's younger siblings were performing in a gospel group. I can't remember the group name, but I remember Lyndsie was acting at their booking agent.

Their gospel group was called Extended Grace and you can find a few of their videos on YouTube. Here's one:

Honestly, is that how "gospel" music sounds? The tempo, the swaying, what a snoozer!

And yes, one of Daniel's brothers has 5 kids (the last 2 were boy/girl twins). He is also married to a Lindsey (spelled differently from Lazy's).

And, Alex Brooker (the youngest of the brothers and on the far left) is actually really cute. He auditioned for American Idol.

[LeatherCouch]

Hey, it's a good thing if they don't care whether the birth parents are fat!

Sorry. Couldn't help myself. Continue.

Hahaha! I'll blame that on my pain killers. I reread my post and it doesn't sound like me at all. Interesting.

[LeatherCouch]

We were in an adult sunday school class when some older woman piped up about "god works in mysterious ways" since some family there in the church had adopted after infertility, miscarriagea and stillborn of the one pregnancy they carried to term--apparently their baby's ashes were buried in the church garden. And wasn't it wonderful that they had all those losses so that now they could realize they needed to adopt.

While she didn't know it, I had lost what turned out to be my only pregnancy less than a year before. I left the classroom and ended up weeping the the bathroom. I told hubs that maybe it would have been a little better if god wanted them to adopt to just "lay it on their hearts" instead of killing their newborns.

Hmm, I think I still sound bitter.....

That's so awful, I'm sorry you went through that.

[clarinetpower]

Madison, you ignorant little chump, ever heard of Abraham and Isaac? Go and read Genesis.

You provide your readers with this gem and follow it with posts about Thanksgiving and Christmas. "Tabaski" is Eid al-Adha and one of the most important Islamic festivals. It celebrates the submission of Abraham to God's will and no lambs are "sacrificed to Mohammed." Only those who can afford it are required to kill a sheep. The feast is divided into 3 parts, one part to eat on Tabaski, one to save for later (no pigging out like Americans do on Thanksgiving) and one part to distribute to the needy. Also, how many Americans buy a whole lot of crap that they really can't afford to open gifts on Christmas day? Bah!

Please go post this on his site.

[clarinetpower]

Reading her post and his site, I'm just blown away. She is horrified by the conditions he lives in, and it's probably one of the nicest homes in the area. She is so incredibly spoiled; she has no idea. He sleeps on a cot likely because it's so hot you can't lie on a mattress; you'd overheat and get sick.

He has no idea the culture he's in, and is just spending money and spreading his "gospel" (and it's his, not His) without actually knowing anything about the people or relating to them. That's not the point. Notice how no one smiles in the photos except him, unless the pro soccer player is there.

Nauseating.

[Palimpsest]

Please go post this on his site.

He irritated me so much that I just broke my own rule about posting on Fundie blogs and did post a version of this on Madison's. My google acct's under my old yuku name, Nell. I doubt that it will stay up long but at least he may read it before deleting.

If I posted my annoyance on all the Fundie baby "Missionary" blogs I find then I'd have no time to do anything else. However, Madison, the unfortunate, uneducated and arrogant little sprog, will probably get himself into a lot of trouble in Niger if he starts spouting off nonsense about sacrificing lambs to Mohammed. I hope he learns something from my post. He is so young and sheltered I feel almost sorry for him, but being the epitome of an ugly American is not cool.

I'm pretty sure Madison is aware of FJ. Didn't he come here to tell us that we were being mean to big sis Lyndsie at one point? Hi, Madison!

[Peas n carrots]

He irritated me so much that I just broke my own rule about posting on Fundie blogs and did post a version of this on Madison's. My google acct's under my old yuku name, Nell. I doubt that it will stay up long but at least he may read it before deleting.

If I posted my annoyance on all the Fundie baby "Missionary" blogs I find then I'd have no time to do anything else. However, Madison, the unfortunate, uneducated and arrogant little sprog, will probably get himself into a lot of trouble in Niger if he starts spouting off nonsense about sacrificing lambs to Mohammed. I hope he learns something from my post. He is so young and sheltered I feel almost sorry for him, but being the epitome of an ugly American is not cool.

I'm pretty sure Madison is aware of FJ. Didn't he come here to tell us that we were being mean to big sis Lyndsie at one point? Hi, Madison!

I would like to order The Poisonwood Bible for him. Methinks he needs to read that before he gets too comfortable in Niger.

[formergothardite]

I forgot he had come to FJ. Didn't he write like he was illiterate and then delete everything?

Judging from his two posts he is just another ugly American tourist/missionary who will do more harm than good.

[WonderingInWA]

I forgot he had come to FJ. Didn't he write like he was illiterate and then delete everything?

Judging from his two posts he is just another ugly American tourist/missionary who will do more harm than good.

Lazy is the oldest child in her family and I believe the next closest in age is her brother, Chandler. I think it was Chandler that came here and posted on FJ. He got married this past year. I don't think at the time he posted here Madison would have been old enough/mature enough to stick up for his sister.

[darkplumaged]

Lazy is the oldest child in her family and I believe the next closest in age is her brother, Chandler. I think it was Chandler that came here and posted on FJ. He got married this past year. I don't think at the time he posted here Madison would have been old enough/mature enough to stick up for his sister.

Yup, it was the barely literate Chandler who came here (rather, came to Yuku. I can't believe how long ago all this was!).

[chaotic life]

I doubt Lyndsie has altered her make-up patterns since she left blogging. She's typical southern. She plasters it on heavily but tries to make it look "natural" sort of the real life version of photoshopping.

I passed her at Walmart once when I lived near her. I got home before I could identify how I knew her because I simply knew I knew her but she showed no recognition of me, so it wasn't someone I actually knew in real life. She doesn't stand out as different in a crowd. I live in the south and detest most make-up. I'm the one who stands out in the deep south. She has typical deep southern make-up patterns. They aren't all Tammy Faye, aren't usually Tammy Faye actually. I've known more than one southern woman brag that her husband had Never seen her out of full make-up, and that she rises an hour before him in the morning to ensure that remains the case.

[WonderingInWA]

I doubt Lyndsie has altered her make-up patterns since she left blogging. She's typical southern. She plasters it on heavily but tries to make it look "natural" sort of the real life version of photoshopping.

I passed her at Walmart once when I lived near her. I got home before I could identify how I knew her because I simply knew I knew her but she showed no recognition of me, so it wasn't someone I actually knew in real life. She doesn't stand out as different in a crowd. I live in the south and detest most make-up. I'm the one who stands out in the deep south. She has typical deep southern make-up patterns. They aren't all Tammy Faye, aren't usually Tammy Faye actually. I've known more than one southern woman brag that her husband had Never seen her out of full make-up, and that she rises an hour before him in the morning to ensure that remains the case.

Back in the olden days, when Lazy had her old blog, there were two photos of her without makeup -- one of her on her honeymoon and one at a waterslide park in town somewhere. Both captions were something like "I know I look awful here...blah, blah, blah", like she was apologizing for not having the spackle. It's too bad -- she actually looked her age (20-something) without all the spackle, instead of 40-something trying to look 20-something.

[lilwriter85]

I wasn't on FJ yuku, when Lyndsie's brother posted. But didn't he also accuse FJ of being the reason why that adoption was disrupted? I remember a couple of FJers said something about it. Later when the birth mom from that adoption posted she didn't know about FJ's threads on Lyndsie until several months after she had her daughter. I recall that birth mom at first thought that FJ was devoted to discussing Lyndsie and Daniel. The birth mom said something that the reason she stopped the adoption process with Daniel and Lyndsie was because she didn't like how they answered one of her questions.

[Palimpsest]

You are quite right. It was Chandler who visited us not Madison. If Chandler blamed FJ for that adoption being disrupted it was a big fat lie. Yes the woman in question later denied reading here, but even if she did we do not have that kind of power. I would also think that if, IF, a woman considering an adoption plan read here and changed her mind, then she had doubts before she ever came here.

Back to Madison. These little tourist idiots who want to call themselves Missionaries piss me off. They have no idea what they are getting into.

Young Madison seems to be working with Nathan Bramsen (ROCK International) - that is Nate baptising someone in the photos. Nate's "missionaries" fund themselves in Niger and are very careful not to say publically that they are there to work with Nate. Niger is OK with individuals coming at their own risk to volunteer, spend foreign money and proselytise, but (what I would call) real Missionary NGOs are restricted in numbers and activities. So Nate is careful to appear an individual, not an organization.

Nathan is experienced in Africa (he grew up in Senegal) and might not like the utter cultural disrespect and ignorance Madison displayed in that post. However, Nathan has no skills to speak of either to share in Niger. He is an unwise risk-taker, and very much into conversion by means of bribery. He basically distributes US food, toys and Jebus. I think that most Nigeriens happily take the goods and leave the services, IYKWIM! :D

For a perspective on Nate, see the post here on how the LORD saved him from violent death last year: natebramsen.blogspot.com/

There is also this very brief blog that I find interesting. enroutetoafrica.wordpress.com/

This couple also worked with Nate, but seem much more mature, thoughtful and respectful than Madison. I get the impression that they were quickly disenchanted by Nate and his "mission," but I may be projecting. At any rate, they have no intention of returning to what they call "long-term" missionary work any time soon. They were in Niger for about 6 months altogether!

[formergothardite]

I think he did place the blame on FJ for the disruptive adoption. I think the whole family was devastated and they wanted to find something to blame besides the birth mother not liking Lyndsie and Daniel. I remember that they were sure that this was a done deal and Lyndsie had even responded to people who questioned her behavior by saying something like "there is no way this adoption will fall through." I don't think it even entered their minds that this baby still belonged to the birth mother.

[lilwriter85]

I think there might have been other disrupted adoptions in addition to that one. There was a blogger who blogged about Lydnsie when they adopted the little girl. That blogger said something about Lyndsie having a few disrupted adoptions. Lyndsie's original blog was pretty easy to find and Lyndsie's blog content might have been the rope that hung her and Daniel when it came to birth moms. Lyndsie and Daniel didn't even have a $1000 for a home study when they started their adoption journey. A friend of theirs suggested that they collect donations online and they did that and then there was the adoption fund. Those details might have turned off some birth moms. I also think Lyndsie's lack of education or vocal training/education could have been another factor. Some birth moms are going to want couples with back up plans and additional resources in case something happens to one of the parents. Also information about Lyndsie's cancer was online because fundraisers were held for her.

[Terrie]

As far as her makeup goes, I just don't get the "spackle it on" method. The end result really enters the Uncanny Valley for me.