Teri Mawell's post about shopping

[BornFree]

"I am blessed to have daughters who want me to go with them when they go shopping."

Do they even have a choice?

You're right - it's not a choice. Steve is afraid of any interaction between his adult children without himself or Teri present. It might lead to even a small amount of Thinking and Questioning that might challenge his control.

[docmom]

I, too, occasionally go shopping with my mother. We do not now, and, I predict, will never purposely coordinate our outfits; however, we do have fun. My mother worked outside the home for a fair portion of my childhood. She had then and has now a large circle of friends and interests. Her life does not revolve around me or any of her children. She is happy. Funny how that works...

[bean]

You're right - it's not a choice. Steve is afraid of any interaction between his adult children without himself or Teri present. It might lead to even a small amount of Thinking and Questioning that might challenge his control.

I also think that this is about emotional control - there's no way that the "girls" could even hint at not "wanting" their mother's company, or anybody else in the family, for that matter. I've experienced the same kind of guilt attempts from my own mother. "I was surprised you didn't invite me to dinner with you and your friends on your birthday" - those kinds of things. I can see Teri crying (didn't she cry when the siblings fought as kids?), "I spent all those years raising you with no adult company besides your father's and now you don't even want me to go SPARKLE SHOPPING with you?" Ugh, exhausting.

[SPHASH]

Teri talks about sharing their hearts. What could they possibly have to share? They are together 24/7/365. They have no friends, the girls don't have husbands or boyfriends, never had sex, don't have kids so they can't really engage in girl talk. They have no hobbies except for sewing and artsy craftsy things.

[OkToBeTakei]

It's bad enough that all the adverts are now Christmas and all the shops have Christmassy stuff, now even the fundies are jumping on the early bandwagon!!

IT"S STILL OCTOBER!!!

Sparkles huh? This could be interesting. Or most likely not.

[Jana814]

Teri talks about sharing their hearts. What could they possibly have to share? They are together 24/7/365. They have no friends, the girls don't have husbands or boyfriends, never had sex, don't have kids so they can't really engage in girl talk. They have no hobbies except for sewing and artsy craftsy things.

This!

[terranova]

Do they make sparkles in beige? Taupe perhaps?

[sparkles]

That's it! I'm changing my screen name! What with Sparkly Lauren and now Sparkly Maxwells, it just not the same any more... LEAVE SPARKLES ALONE!

I love spending time with my mother (but not shopping because I HATE shopping). This past weekend alone, we went to an opera and had brunch along with my dad and sister. She's a very cool and unique person and we share many interests and really enjoy our time together. But she also has a very full and rich life apart from us--at 80 she still practices law (working mainly with disadvantaged clients) full time--so not only do we have our mutual interests to talk about but so many other things as well.

My sister and I also think of each other as best friends but it's something that happened organically and honestly, not because we were forced into a relationship or cut off from non-family contact. We definitely didn't get along as adolescents and teens (we're 5 years apart), to the point where our parents thought it best not to have us share a room, but as we got older we really grew to appreciate one another. My sister is the first person I go to when I need support or want to share something important and vice-versa. But again, this happened organically, because we had the freedom to live our own lives. Why people like the Maxwells are so afraid of allowing their children this same freedom confounds me. Really, what's so horrible if siblings just happened not to like one another? It would be wonderful if they did, but sometimes that's just not the way it works out. Of course, in Maxwelland, you basically ARE your sibling but still...

I really wonder if deep down, there are Maxwells who can't stand the sight of each other but have nowhere to escape to so they just grit their teeth and smile smile smile.

[Milly-Molly-Mandy]

"I am blessed to have daughters who want me to go with them when they go shopping."

Do they even have a choice?

My sister and I (not homeschooled) love to go shopping with our Mum (who worked full time since my sis was 7 & part Time before that)

We are both younger than Poor Sarah, married, college educated, good careers & sis has a baby. Probably a failure by Maxhell standards.

Actually my brother also loves spending Time including shopping with my Mum too. Wow...this would blow their minds.

[thoughtful]

I'll chime in. My Mom is a homebody by nature, and very focused on family. Most of her paid work outside the home was in the family business owned by my uncle, side by side with my Dad and other family members. She now lives in my house (we each have our own "apartment"), and has only two activities that don't involve me, one of which is done at home. I am her ride wherever she goes, other than her weekly mah jongg game.

We spend a lot of time together.

But it's not because she "kept my heart" with restrictions and fears. I got educated in several subjects in which my parents had no interest and for which they had no skills. I moved far away, worked full-time, had friendships and love affairs, etc. My parents were world-class worry-warts, but they let their children go and grow.

I just find my mother interesting and pleasant to be with -- I like her more than most people I've met, despite having met thousands of people. I gave her my heart, voluntarily.

No matter how nice my Mom is, I doubt I'd enjoy and trust her as much if she hadn't been able to let me go, to let me be myself.

Maybe Teri is enjoyable, too. Maybe her daughters would still like and enjoy her if they had a choice, and had thousands of people with whom to compare her.

But she, and they, may never know.

[ThatSnark]

That's it! I'm changing my screen name! What with Sparkly Lauren and now Sparkly Maxwells, it just not the same any more... LEAVE SPARKLES ALONE!

I love spending time with my mother (but not shopping because I HATE shopping). This past weekend alone, we went to an opera and had brunch along with my dad and sister. She's a very cool and unique person and we share many interests and really enjoy our time together. But she also has a very full and rich life apart from us--at 80 she still practices law (working mainly with disadvantaged clients) full time--so not only do we have our mutual interests to talk about but so many other things as well.

My sister and I also think of each other as best friends but it's something that happened organically and honestly, not because we were forced into a relationship or cut off from non-family contact. We definitely didn't get along as adolescents and teens (we're 5 years apart), to the point where our parents thought it best not to have us share a room, but as we got older we really grew to appreciate one another. My sister is the first person I go to when I need support or want to share something important and vice-versa. But again, this happened organically, because we had the freedom to live our own lives. Why people like the Maxwells are so afraid of allowing their children this same freedom confounds me. Really, what's so horrible if siblings just happened not to like one another? It would be wonderful if they did, but sometimes that's just not the way it works out. Of course, in Maxwelland, you basically ARE your sibling but still...

I really wonder if deep down, there are Maxwells who can't stand the sight of each other but have nowhere to escape to so they just grit their teeth and smile smile smile.

Sparkles, I think it's inevitable-- the arc of the universe is bending you toward oneness with the Maxwells. :dance:

[Myfanwy]

...

No matter how nice my Mom is, I doubt I'd enjoy and trust her as much if she hadn't been able to let me go, to let me be myself.

Maybe Teri is enjoyable, too. Maybe her daughters would still like and enjoy her if they had a choice, and had thousands of people with whom to compare her.

But she, and they, may never know.

In my totally uneducated opinion I think, as usual, we are back to that ol' chestnut choice. Lots of us heathens like/d our mums and were happy to spend time with our siblings. We didn't need cutting off from the world and being kept from the TV and books and every other stinkin' thing that exists in the real world. We made our own choices and, oh, lookie, we still chose to spend time with our families. Who knew?

[thoughtful]

In my totally uneducated opinion I think, as usual, we are back to that ol' chestnut choice. Lots of us heathens like/d our mums and were happy to spend time with our siblings. We didn't need cutting off from the world and being kept from the TV and books and every other stinkin' thing that exists in the real world. We made our own choices and, oh, lookie, we still chose to spend time with our families. Who knew?

Yep.

They work so hard at things that cause so much harm, out of fear and need to control.

[DarkAnts]

I wonder if they purchased buttons with glitter in them. Thats the extent of sparkle we will probably see in their outfits.

[darkplumaged]

I'll bet they got sparkly scarves. We know that they like wearing scarves with their Christmas outfits, and scarves are not eye traps because they cover up, rather than draw attention to, defrauding womanly parts.

[nelliebelle1197]

That's it! I'm changing my screen name! What with Sparkly Lauren and now Sparkly Maxwells, it just not the same any more... LEAVE SPARKLES ALONE!

I am not only invested in your screenname, but I am absolutely convinced that is really a picture of you.