Ready To Be Married? Prepare To Suffer!

[Patsy]

AuntCloud, I'm at a computer now, so I thought I'd explain properly.

My amazing digital imaging skillz are under a cut, lest some unprepared person be blown away by said skillz :? *cough*

You go down here:

and click "share".

Then you copy this string after "youtu.be", not including the forward slash "/"

and paste that in your text box and click fj's "youtube" button while it's still selected;

OR click fj's "youtube" button and then paste the string in between the square-bracketed bits :)

[kitkat]

I just can't snark on this one. A lot of the thoughts she's describing are very similar to ones that I've had when I've been seriously depressed, bordering on suicidal. Its tragic that she's latched on to a religion that is reinforcing and feeding her depression, but I just can't find obvious mental illness snarkworthy.

[Peas n carrots]

It kinda sounds to me like being a good fundy wife is all about someone only wanting you for your body. The blogger makes being a wife sound like you are nothing more than a warm masturbation device which delivers offspring and makes sandwiches (with a smile!) - sort of a cross between a blow up doll and Rosie from The Jetsons. The only time a husband like that would care about his wife is if she started to get uppity and have ideas, then he'd have to get interested in her "godly character" by teaching her a thing or two about the value of having a meek and quiet demeanor. Or else.

I've been very happily married for seventeen years. I've never once thought of my marriage, my kids or my life as something I need to suffer endlessly through. I think if her marriage is this miserable, it's all kinds of wrong.

It's like being a Stepford Wife, only with less personality.

She is trying to sell herself her miserable life, and misery loves company. The more people miserable,, the more it validates her misery.

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

It's like being a Stepford Wife, only with less personality.

She is trying to sell herself her miserable life, and misery loves company. The more people miserable,, the more it validates her misery.

Totally this. A LOT of fundie women's blogs can be described this way, actually. (Lori, anyone?)

[debrand]

Holy crap, that's appalling. Is this on the internet somewhere? Can we have the link?

I bumped up the thread that mentioned their wedding night. The thread title mentions a book for men that Michael Pearl wrote.

[Claddagh]

I'm single so I don't have a dog in that fight.

I know in every marriage there will be a few bumps in the road but that doesn't mean you've got to be hauling the cross behind you. If you're really that miserable in your marriage then seek councelling, get a seperation, or a divorce.

[happy atheist]

Here's a screenshot of the Pearls' romantic honeymoon story:

[sparkles]

Hmm, that last sentence would almost lead you to believe that he came to his senses and realized that this is NOT the way you treat another human being. But this is Michael Swine we're talking about so in all likelihood, the adjustments he made had more to do with ramping up the abuse and beating Debi down until he broke her completely rather than with him learning not to treat his wife like something you scrape off the bottom of your shoe.

[ILoveJellybeans]

That is the least romantic story ever.

Michael Pearl is a selfish psychopathic asshole

[Bookworm]

I had no idea it was possible to have that terrible of a honeymoon without combining a shipwreck, a holdup, and losing all the luggage or something. For once I am feeling really, really sorry for Debi.

[thoughtful]

Is Michael Pearl ever, even for a minute or two, not a monumental asshole and abuser?

[idonthaveajname]

This thread is completely filled with WTF.

I'm just appalled. And it takes a lot for me to say that.

[nokidsmom]

I have to say I knew a number of fundie-lite girls from college who thought that it was their lot in life to suffer as part of marriage. A number of them married some pretty troubled guys because of this mindset. When I ditched my troubled ex-fiance, I got a lot of flak over how I was supposed to "help" him by suffering with him in marriage and that I was horribly failing him by leaving him. Um, no. It seemed pretty messed up even to my young, naive, 20 year old self.

[Mela99]

Poor woman. I hear her from the "I have pain in places I didn't know existed!" . One more reason I'm glad that's not gonna be my honeymoon.

This guy sounds like an absolute dick. Do everything! I need sex! Quit whining!

[alaeangelorum]

Apart from the him being horribly selfish and it all being very unromantic, I find it really weird that he doesn't seem to realise that if he is really tired, she will be really tired too having done the same things. Also, he doesn't seem to realise that women can get angry - had he never met any women who weren't meek/submissive and keeping sweet all the time??

[ILoveJellybeans]

Is there anything in the world more sexually unappealing than Michael Pearl?

[FlorenceHamilton]

Is there anything in the world more sexually unappealing than Michael Pearl?

QFT

[SpeakNow]

If I were Debi Pearl I would've divorced his ass before the honey moon was over. I've heard of "disaster" honey moons, they've never been disasters because the new spouse was a royal asshole (usually the "disaster" is the trip...not the husband!)

[Savoring Samsara]

:wtf: That was actually even worse than I thought it was going to be.

[wtylcf]

I totally agree - that story was even WORSE than I remembered it to be. How can another person be so dense that they are completely unaware of the needs of the other person? "I'd seen her go barefoot many times before, so I assumed she wouldn't mind walking barefoot IN THE DARK while I decided to go crabbing IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT while she carried back all the crabs I caught, and while I hogged the flashlight so she couldn't see where she was stepping. Did I mention I didn't give her enough time to find her shoes because I am a selfish, impatient bastard?" "I didn't realize she'd slept less than two hours due to having sex with me and cooking for me while I napped. I assumed wives were like sex robots, but also like adventuresome brothers you could boss around and have do all the work. I assumed she'd get used to it!"

I'm not a violent person by nature, but it's hard to not imagine myself in the same situation and think that I'd do anything less than clock the guy in the jaw, then stomp away yelling, "I will have my lawyer serve you the divorce papers."

[Rosa]

none of that sounds like cluelessness to me, it sounds like he pushed right past all her boundaries to see what she would and woulnd't put up with, and just kept right going straight to "beaten down" because that's what he actually wanted.

Want to bet that if she'd stood up to him, told him no, and decked him back when he tried to "teach" her not to do that, Pearl's views on divorce would be "hell yes!"?

[wtylcf]

none of that sounds like cluelessness to me, it sounds like he pushed right past all her boundaries to see what she would and woulnd't put up with, and just kept right going straight to "beaten down" because that's what he actually wanted.

Want to bet that if she'd stood up to him, told him no, and decked him back when he tried to "teach" her not to do that, Pearl's views on divorce would be "hell yes!"?

You're probably right. The fact that he gave her advice on what to do about the escaped crabs while he lazed on the bed instead of jumping up to help her, and then he had the audacity to call her "a crab" when she yelled at him, is beyond cluelessness. It's cruelty. Not to mention being coerced into sex multiple times against her will, then ordered to perform tasks while he slept while being deprived of sleep herself, taken into situations where she was injured, forced to do the work of carrying things while he had all the fun, all while not being given adequate bodily protection like shoes and a flashlight...we all know the Pearls are child abusers, but I guess it all started with Michael getting off on abusing Debi.

[salex]

Is there anything in the world more sexually unappealing than Michael Pearl?

Possibly Michael Pearl the 5th time he comes at your on your wedding night when you are sore and exhausted.....

[lizziesmom]

Is there anything in the world more sexually unappealing than Michael Pearl?

Jim Bob Duggar

[Koala]

Jim Bob Duggar

Jim Bob doesn't hold a candle to Michael Pearl. Michael Pearl is a sick, vicious, child abusing bastard