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"Alcohol leads to failed marriages and relationships!"


xReems

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I was at Publix yesterday, picking up two bottles of red wine when this woman behind me in the check out line decided to butt into my business. She asked me if those two bottles were wine, which I politely responded with "Yes, it is." Rather than having normal convo with me, she decided to lecture me on the dangers of alcohol and how it is frowned upon in the Lord's eyes and how alcohol is the number one leading cause of divorces and failed relationships. I decided to be sarcastic at first but then just to piss her off, I turned around and said "Well, I'm a Hindu and not a Christian and I've been with my boyfriend for almost 3 1/2 years now and we both drink and are doing a'ok! Thanks for your concern though!"

The joys of living in the good 'ol South :clap:

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I was at Publix yesterday, picking up two bottles of red wine when this woman behind me in the check out line decided to butt into my business. She asked me if those two bottles were wine, which I politely responded with "Yes, it is." Rather than having normal convo with me, she decided to lecture me on the dangers of alcohol and how it is frowned upon in the Lord's eyes and how alcohol is the number one leading cause of divorces and failed relationships. I decided to be sarcastic at first but then just to piss her off, I turned around and said "Well, I'm a Hindu and not a Christian and I've been with my boyfriend for almost 3 1/2 years now and we both drink and are doing a'ok! Thanks for your concern though!"

The joys of living in the good 'ol South :clap:

Wow. Just... wow. The nerve of some people. What a fucking idiot.

Seriously, this is 2011, not the 1920's. The temperance movement is long dead.

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In some cases and with some people, alcohol contributes and sometimes causes relationships to fail and end. But, it is not the alcohol itself, it is the person abusing it. Beer doesn't do a damned thing to anyone just by existing. It's the misuse of it that has consequences.

Not in all cases and not as a general rule. If that were the case, the divorce rate would be much higher than 50% or whatever it currently is. Or, maybe not because marriages wouldn't even happen in the first place.

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lol. My parents have been having wine or beer with dinner for decades. Married over 30 years. I think they're OK. :D

Maybe this woman's passion (misplaced as it is, not to mention rudely presented) comes from bad personal experience? I know drinking played a big part in the dysfunction of my mother's family. But it was *drinking* drinking, pretty much constant state of drunkenness with her parents.

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Ugh, what an ass. I can't believe someone would do that. How would she feel if a vegetarian lectured her about meat she was buying? That's just so obnoxious.

I really hate it when people get judgmental about drinking. My parents claim they don't think alcohol in moderation is wrong, but they still get pretty judgy about people who drink. My mom really wanted to make homemade vanilla extract, but she would not go in a liquor store because people might see her and think she was buying alcohol to drink. (That was when our county was still dry. I think you can buy alcohol in regular stores now, but I'm still underage and haven't paid much attention.) I have a Hindu friend who is judgier than any Christian fundie I've ever met, and she will be especially horrified if the person drinking is Indian. I think it's kind of hilarious, though. I just hope she grows out of it eventually.

I want to like wine. It seems such a cultured thing to enjoy, but I can pretty much only drink a sweet rosé, and that probably doesn't really count (I can't do beer, either). I'm not giving up trying to develop a taste for red wine, though.

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Some people seem to think that if something is bad for you, it's bad for everyone. In one issue of Vegetarian Times, someone wrote an angry letter over the magazine having a feature on beer. The article wasn't written in a "Yay booze!" way. It was about using beer as a flavoring in cooking, like you would do with wine. The letter writer wrote that she was a recovering alcoholic, and ended by saying, "I just don't see how alcohol can be a part of any healthy lifestyle." I'm sorry that she has a disease that leaves her unable to handle alcohol, but a good 90% of the magazine's readership doesn't share that problem, and alcohol can fit into a healthy lifestyle in moderation.

xReems, I bet the woman who hassled you would blow a gasket over my family drinking four glasses of wine during the Passover seder--or my friends performing the mitzvah of getting drunk on Purim.

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Some people seem to think that if something is bad for you, it's bad for everyone. In one issue of Vegetarian Times, someone wrote an angry letter over the magazine having a feature on beer. The article wasn't written in a "Yay booze!" way. It was about using beer as a flavoring in cooking, like you would do with wine. The letter writer wrote that she was a recovering alcoholic, and ended by saying, "I just don't see how alcohol can be a part of any healthy lifestyle." I'm sorry that she has a disease that leaves her unable to handle alcohol, but a good 90% of the magazine's readership doesn't share that problem, and alcohol can fit into a healthy lifestyle in moderation.

xReems, I bet the woman who hassled you would blow a gasket over my family drinking four glasses of wine during the Passover seder--or my friends performing the mitzvah of getting drunk on Purim.

I bet she'd blow a gasket if she actually read the fucking Bible and realized how much wine people drink in the OT, and how Jesus turns water into ACTUAL WINE in the NT. I bet she'd lose faith fast :D

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I bet she'd blow a gasket if she actually read the fucking Bible and realized how much wine people drink in the OT, and how Jesus turns water into ACTUAL WINE in the NT. I bet she'd lose faith fast

Oh no. See, it was actually *grape juice* the Bible is talking about. Jesus turned the water into *grape juice* at the wedding. :D

ETA: to be clear, that's not my argument. I think it was wine. But it's what I heard growing up from all kinds of religious teetotalers.

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Oh no. See, it was actually *grape juice* the Bible is talking about. Jesus turned the water into *grape juice* at the wedding. :D

Yep, the Bible prohibits getting drunk off of grape juice. I pointed this out to an LDS girl once who was claiming that wine back then wasn't alcoholic, and she kind of sputtered (she eventually conceded the point; she was actually pretty reasonable overall, just funny about those issues).

I think it's also pretty clear that people were getting very drunk at those weddings. That's sort of the point of saving the cheap stuff for last, isn't it?

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wow. and i thought alcohol was what LED to marriages and relationships...

:lol: That's what I was thinking! Knocking back a beer or two got my inhibitions down just enough to put the moves on my now boyfriend. We're doing just fine.

Rachel333, my parents are the same way. They say alcohol in moderation is fine, but they demonize it like nobody's business. They know that I drink, but they know I'm responsible, so I guess it's okay. Although who knows, maybe they talk behind my back about it. Whatever. Once I got older I was talking with my aunt about alcohol and she informed me that my parents sometimes get wine and cocktails when they're out with her. O.O . So I guess they do drink after all, but they just make a huge deal out of never drinking in front of my brother and me. Never understood that one.

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Rachel333, my parents are the same way. They say alcohol in moderation is fine, but they demonize it like nobody's business. They know that I drink, but they know I'm responsible, so I guess it's okay. Although who knows, maybe they talk behind my back about it. Whatever. Once I got older I was talking with my aunt about alcohol and she informed me that my parents sometimes get wine and cocktails when they're out with her. O.O . So I guess they do drink after all, but they just make a huge deal out of never drinking in front of my brother and me. Never understood that one.

I don't demonize alcohol, but I rarely drink in front of either of my children, although that's relaxed a bit since my stepson became legal drinking age. I wanted both of my kids to know that they can socialize and have a good time without alcohol (or other substances - weed, coke, and E are incredibly prolific where I live, due to living in a resort community), and that reaching for a substance is not a way that we deal with stress in our family.

I've worked with addicted teens, and in almost all cases, their daily exposure to alcohol and other substances were normalized from a very young age. Once dependency is established as a pattern in your parent, it can be harder to not reach for the same substance in stressful times; hence I meet second-generation coke addicts.

Yes, addiction and dependency are incredibly complex issues, and stories vary between individuals. However, this is why I rarely treat myself to a glass of Australian red in front of my kids. I also completely abstein when I am driving. I won't even have 1.

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Like others said, it is true that alcohol can lead to divorces and break ups but that's if people highly dependent on it to get through the day. Yes, my boyfriend and I both drink but we don't drink til we get drunk nor do we heavily rely on alcohol. My parents and I love drinking, especially when I'm home, but that doesn't mean it's going to lead to a life of negativity and rebellious life. What I do with my life and my own time is my business and I don't need someone breathing down my neck telling me what THEY think is right and wrong; I'm 23, I think I can figure out on my own what I can and cannot handle.

Seriously, if someone says something like that to me again, I'm gonna make sure my vegetarian mom is with me so she can lecture to them how eating meat is bad, etc etc and throw some Hindu beliefs down their throat. Give them a dose of their own medicine. HA! Payback.

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I'm vegetarian. The number of times people will comment in grocery store lines about how there's no meat in my cart... sheesh. Or better yet, when there's a token steak or two for my omniverous husband... that's a good convo right there. There is something about grocery stores that brings out judgement.

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The people who boggle my mind are the ones who will allow (grudgingly) that it's okay to drink alcohol, but NEVER okay, heavens no, NEVER okay to "drink it to get drunk."

Let's be honest here - a good part of the pleasure of a good beer (or glass of wine, for that matter) is the buzz. People do not ONLY drink beer and wine for the taste. We are mammals. All kinds of mammals have long known the pleasure of the Fermented Things. Fallen fruit on the ground too long? That's when things get exciting!

Mind, you don't have to get drunk to the point of complete impairment, but the people who will sit there and strenuously deny feeling anything at all, or hoping to get a nice floating feeling, just... lolwut? It's a drug like any other, the key is regulating the dose. It's okay to enjoy the warm feeling of the glass of wine at dinner.

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I'm vegetarian. The number of times people will comment in grocery store lines about how there's no meat in my cart... sheesh. Or better yet, when there's a token steak or two for my omniverous husband... that's a good convo right there. There is something about grocery stores that brings out judgement.

Oh, yah. I grow my own vegetables and get most of my meat from local farmers, so my grocery cart is always a little off-balance, although in a different direction from yours. Coffee, wine, chocolate, cheese, cat food. . . And don't get me started on the whispers and snarks that sometimes accompany my annual purchase of 24 ct bottle water.

Years ago when supermarkets first started letting people pay with credit cards I had a little blue-haired blue-nosed lady chide me for buying things that I obviously couldn't afford if I was paying with a credit card. I just gave her my trademark fishy stare. Poor woman will never know the pleasures of a free flight to Europe, paid for with credit card rewards.

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Years ago when supermarkets first started letting people pay with credit cards I had a little blue-haired blue-nosed lady chide me for buying things that I obviously couldn't afford if I was paying with a credit card. I just gave her my trademark fishy stare. Poor woman will never know the pleasures of a free flight to Europe, paid for with credit card rewards.

The Etiquette Hell approved response to such a ridiculous comment is "What an interesting assumption!"

Like you, I pay for everything with my credit card. Love the cash back bonus each year! And I pay our balance in full every month. They haven't gotten a penny of interest from us in over 30 years!

(if you haven't visited E-Hell, I totally recommend it - almost as much good snark as here!)

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I can't stand it when anyone comments on something I'm about to consume. Girl in line at Subway today commented on my sandwich, "No vegetables? That's interesting..." I'm glad you think that's interesting, dear, now please worry about your own sandwich.

Or, my lovely roommate last year would always comment on other people's food at the table looking "gross" or she would say something like, "How can you eat that?" I wanted to smack her across the face. It's rude!

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wow. and i thought alcohol was what LED to marriages and relationships...

Damn straight! My husband said he had the nerve to talk to me at a college party because he had a few beers in him by the time I got there. His opening line was "hey, you wanna drink?" and handed me a beer.(hey, he was 18,what do you expect?) Thanks Budwiser, 22 years and still going strong. :clap:

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I can't stand it when anyone comments on something I'm about to consume. Girl in line at Subway today commented on my sandwich, "No vegetables? That's interesting..." I'm glad you think that's interesting, dear, now please worry about your own sandwich.

Or, my lovely roommate last year would always comment on other people's food at the table looking "gross" or she would say something like, "How can you eat that?" I wanted to smack her across the face. It's rude!

I can't stand that! So unbelievably rude!

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wow. and i thought alcohol was what LED to marriages and relationships...

Not to mention unplanned arrows for one's quiver ....

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My in-laws were married for over 40 years until death did they part. They had wine with every meal, and FIL made MIL cocktails when she came home stressed out from work. My marriage follows a similar pattern, although we can longer afford to have wine as often.

Alcohol impairs your inhibitions, so if you are naturally an asshole, that will definitely come out when you are drinking. Nice, rational people can have a drink or two without any Christian Domestic Discipline occurring.

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Only fundies and some Mormons believe that one drink makes everyone an alcoholic. Now, my grandparents were married 58 years before death did they part, and they had wine with dinner, and my grandpa occasionally liked scotch as a treat. He lived until he was in his 80's, and my grandma is still alive at 86.

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