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kids: wait until you are married and ask hubby for earrings


linnea27

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Seriously? Its her body, her choice, not her future husbands. If he doesnt like earrings and she has pierced ears, tough shit, its not like she has 50 piercings all over her face. If he doesnt like women with earrings, he shouldnt marry one then. Its not like its a big deal, most people have their ears pierced. It isnt down to a man's decision.

With my future kids, they can get their ears pierced if they are old enough to ask for it done and know how to look after them properly.

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There's just no part of her body a woman can control, huh?

I am totally opposed to piercing a baby's ears for the same reason. Wait until they're old enough to make their own decision on that.

And you know what? If you want 50 face piercings and full body tattoos and horns implanted under your scalp, go for it! As long as you're aware of the potential consequences, it's your body, have at it.

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I would wait until my kids were old enough to enjoy it. There's nothing like the thrill of having your parents finally let you get your ears pierced...and the dirty looks from all the other parents whose daughters came home from school begging the next day.

And a husband who considers earrings a dealbreaker is someone not worth marrying. Creep.

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I think 3 is a little young to get them done personally from a safety aspect (not to mention the vision of Toddlers and Tiaras donning big lobe-pulling gaudy crap, but to wait until the husband says so? WTF?

I'm glad my mom let me get mine done at 13, which I think is a pretty good age because by then you really want them and you're cognizant of how to take care of them and all.

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I got mine at age 4 and really, really wanted them. Still have my ears pierced. Reality check: Not one man I have dated has mentioned my pierced ears as a reason they either wanted to date me or dumped me. Men don't really care about a set of pierced ears in general. If they did, that would be the end of that because it's one set of pierced ears. That'd be one seriously disturbed control freak if he cared that I had pierced ears and had not given me permission to have them done and/or I "mutilated" my body or something insane.

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*scratches head* WTF? She asked her husband permission? When I got my tattoo last year I asked what his thoughts were as I wanted to be considerate - and he said if I liked it that is what mattered to him. My DH would wonder what was wrong with me if I asked him for permission...we never ask each other's permission but we always ask what the other's opinion is on everything, and that is going both ways.

I got my ears pierced at 5. I think it depends on the kid...if they seem able and willing to take care of them (which I wasn't the best at...my skin grew over the back of one of my studs and my mom had to perform surgery...yeeowouch!) then go ahead. I would say with most kids that would be the 5-7 range.

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This poor little girl. Even her body will never be considered her own.

I won't pierce my daughters' ears at birth. No strong feelings against it, but I had so much fun deciding to do it (what an empowering feeling at that age!) and going to the mall with my grandmother. I'm glad I had that experience when I was old enough to remember it.

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I got mine at age 4 and really, really wanted them.

The same here. I was 4-5. 20 years later I still have them. :)

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How many guys do you know that obsess over earrings. I mean my mother-in-law last year gave me earrings and I told my husband I wish she hadn't have. He was like why and I had to go umm I guess you've never noticed I don't have pierced ears. He was all oh yeah I just never thought about it because I know you do not wear a lot of jewelry.

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I'm also one who thinks it should be done when the girl is old enough to care for the piercings, and when she asks. In my case, I got my ears pierced the first time at 8, as that's when I asked for piercings as that's when most girls I knew were getting their ears pierced. I now have a second set of ear piercings, mostly because it was my way of celebrating the divorce from my verbally abusive ex-husband becoming final. In that case, it was my way of saying I'm in control of my life, and that definitely includes my body. The point is, ear piercing should be something that's left up to the person, as long as they can care for the piercings as it's their body, their choice. My niece is now 5, and hasn't even asked about getting her ears pierced, as my brother and SIL decided to wait until she was older.

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I let my daughters wait until they wanted their ears pierced. And then took them out to get it done. My oldest doesn't have hers done at all.

As for tattoos- the husband and I have an agreement that nothing gets tattoo'd above the clavicle or below the elbow. Other than that, it's what ever you want.

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There's just no part of her body a woman can control, huh?

I am totally opposed to piercing a baby's ears for the same reason. Wait until they're old enough to make their own decision on that.

And you know what? If you want 50 face piercings and full body tattoos and horns implanted under your scalp, go for it! As long as you're aware of the potential consequences, it's your body, have at it.

I never thought of that :embarrassed:

I had my ears pierced as a baby, like my mom, my granny and so on...

I waited until age 2 to pierce my daughters ears, and I thought it was late :lol:

I never thought of waiting later, here all the little girls have pierced ear from a young age.

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I like this comment because of its honesty: We let our daughter get earrings in order to reminder her she is our slave:

Shawn Lilly We heard a lady talking in church about the Bible passage of a slave that could be set free deciding to bind himself to his master for life. The slave would be taken to the public square and have his ear pierced as a symbol of his commitment. My husband and I decided to use this as a symbol for our daughter's commitment to Christ. As she puts in her earrings, she is reminded that she has chosen to live her life obedient to Him.

If the Jslaves have pierced ears, this is probably why.

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I believe Kim from LiaS has the same policy for her daughters: no permanent body enhancements until they're married and have their husband's permission.

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One of the things I talk about with my 5 year old (who got her ears pierced around her 5th birthday--per her request), is that her body belongs to her and no one has the right to touch her. Even before I give her a hug, I ask her. When I was growing up I always hated when I was forced to hug or kiss people I didn't want to.

So if this woman is teaching her daughter that the simple decision of earrings isn't hers to make, that teaches her that she isn't able to make decisions about her body, period. Way to set your daughter up for a lifetime of abuse, lady. Of course my guess is that if anything would happen to this girl, there would be a lot of victim blaming going on...

And if she's not smart enough to make decisions regarding what to wear, what does that teach her about the rest of life's decisions? That she always has to have someone else make them for her? Isn't that part of raising kids, that you teach them decision making skills?? :angry-banghead:

What if she never marries? Then she can never wear earrings??

If this isn't one of the stupidest things I've read today, I don't know what is. That poor child. I hope she runs far away as soon as she can.

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There was a fundie-light family that went to my high school that had this rule. The daughters weren't allowed to get their ears pierced until they got married and asked their husbands for permission. One of the daughters got her ears pierced anyway and was punished for it.

That daughter ended up dying of meningitis her senior year of high school. I sometimes wonder if the parents ever felt bad for the way they treated their daughter poorly over something so stupid.

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That's just... bizarre. Something I never would've even considered. I really can't imagine living my life in such a restricted way because I was waiting on my "future husband" (and no one has a guarantee to get married, either, some of these girls will never have a husband!) to tell me what I should do. Nor can I imagine having my spouse ask me if I want them to have pierced ears or not. So very strange.

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pretty disgusting. where do they draw the line to what a woman can do without her (future) husband's permission. will they let their daughter paint their nails, or is that something that has to be discussed as well? can she get her hair dyed or a perm? it's insanity.

my mom had my ears pierced when I was a little baby, and I'm pretty glad she did. As a kid I was terrified of needles, and I would never have let anyone near my ears with one, but I LOOOOOVED wearing earrings. And even when I went through phases of not wanting to wear earrings at all, they didn't close up because they'd been around as long as I had practically. I had a pretty good collection of silly kid earrings that are still fun to whip out from time to time. when I was a teen and everybody else was hoping on the ear piercing train and feeling so empowered about it all, I just went and got more piercings. my secondary piercings have since closed up, but I wear earrings probably about every day. I know that some people are really against piercing baby ears, but it worked out well in the end for me. :dance:

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I would be reluctant to pierce the ears of any small child of mine because while I have piereced ears, I can rarely find earrings that don't irritate my ears--even gold and stainless steel are not always assured of not making my ears itch. I can't wear much costume jewelry in general (I turn green, sometimes in a very short period of time) and even real gold (wedding ring) on a bad day, has been known to leave green marks on my hands. It seems less of an issue as I get older (the green-- the earring issue seems to be worse as I age) but I'd hate to have a young child with limited verbal skills have to endure the itching and pain that I get from some earrings. One of my sisters has the same issue with her earrings, so I suspect some kind of family allergy-- if I had kids I'd wait til they were old enough to recognize a problem.

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I believe Kim from LiaS has the same policy for her daughters: no permanent body enhancements until they're married and have their husband's permission.

Oh lord. Is she the one who wouldn't let her daughter shave her legs, because that decision should also be left up to her future husband? :obscene-birdiered:

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If or when I have kids, they can have their ears pierced when they ask for them provided they are responsible enough to take care of them. Waiting until you can obtain permission from your spouse to get your ears pierced is ridiculous. What the rule if, heaven forbid, your son wants his ears pierced? I would imagine that wouldn't be allowed ever, but still.

I would be reluctant to pierce the ears of any small child of mine because while I have piereced ears, I can rarely find earrings that don't irritate my ears--even gold and stainless steel are not always assured of not making my ears itch. I can't wear much costume jewelry in general (I turn green, sometimes in a very short period of time) and even real gold (wedding ring) on a bad day, has been known to leave green marks on my hands. It seems less of an issue as I get older (the green-- the earring issue seems to be worse as I age) but I'd hate to have a young child with limited verbal skills have to endure the itching and pain that I get from some earrings. One of my sisters has the same issue with her earrings, so I suspect some kind of family allergy-- if I had kids I'd wait til they were old enough to recognize a problem.

Sounds like you have a metal allergy, most likely nickel as that is the most common one. If you want earrings that won't make you itchy, try titanium.

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I got mine done at 9 because I REALLY wanted them and never looked back. to my knowledge, they have not offended anyone of the opposite sex. In fact, they have never really come up as a good or bad thing when discussing my many spectacular attributes. :D

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