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Dr. Dobson : the war on stay at home moms


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Because it needs to be repeated every time this revisionist history crap comes up - it has never been economically possible for most adult women to be engaged in non-income or resource generating work. Never ever ever in the whole history of humanity. The fact that children are able to be economically nonproductive for most of the first two decades of their lives in the Western world is a remarkable development of the late 19th and early 20th century. These people are so far up their own asses . . . .

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I work outside the house. My closest friend is a stay at home mom. Apparently, I need to take her down. In deference to our long standing friendship, should I let her know that attack is imminent? Neither of us owns a gun. Maybe we should duel? I'm sure we could each find some sort of pointy object to get the job done. Trebuchet? We could fling dirty diapers at each other. Setting them on fire for extra effect.

Ah hell, we'll probably just do what we always do and go out for drinks. War's too much work.

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I'm a stay at home mom/housewife. Today, I dropped my child off at school, went to three different grocery stores, came home, made two batches of yeast rolls, two pies, a batch of cookies, a batch of hummus, and dinner, and I cleaned the kitchen.

Since no one tried to stop me and no one scoffed at or mocked me, should I feel left out? I mean, I want to be part of this war, too! How does one become a victim? Would screaming, "Help, help, I'm being oppressed!" as I'm washing the dishes work?

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I am a housewife soon to be a stay at home mom, at least for a few years. I am hoping once the little one is in school to get a job.

Though seriously, these people are crazy. With all the imaginary wars, and I really wish they would stop flinging the word WAR around and taking it so lightly. It's quite annoying.

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Dobson is an idiot. I agree that the modern concept of a SAHM was a rarity throughout most of history. Women had to work and contribute monetarily because most could ill afford to give up their labor. The women that "stayed home" tended the garden, helped with farming, made clothing and soap, and even engaged in small economic activities. The concept of the modern SAHM who cooked and cleaned and cared for children, but did not spend most of their time in money generating activities, is a modern invention. The change occurred because work is removed from the home, because jobs are specialized, and because developed nations are wealthy enough that a large number of people could afford to live decently without requiring every able-bodied adult participating in income-generating activities. Even today, many families still feel the need to have two incomes just to survive.

That said, I believe the SAHM vs working mother conflict is real. It's no different than the many other parenting debates that arise (attachment vs scheduling, spanking vs nospank, cloth vs disposable). I think woman's roles are in flux. We have a growing contingent that believes women should bring in money and still raise a family. Then we have a smaller segment that believe families are better off when women stay home. Young women become entangled in these conflicting beliefs. For mothers with young children, they feel guilty for working, as if it's a selfish choice, but they also feel under-appreciated and invisible for staying home because they spend their days cooking, cleaning and changing diapers despite two master degrees. It's kind of a no-win situation for young women.

I'd rather see society embrace the many roles women are offered. And then I'd like to see that spread to the male population. Each person's priority and life situation is different. Instead of disparaging others for their choices, I feel we should celebrate a society that allows for so many different family dynamics. Isn't it wonderful we can have families where fathers work and mothers don't or mothers work and fathers don't or both work? Why do people insist that the there must exist one ideal economic arrangement? People are different and each family is unique. We should expect that different families have different needs. Rather than look down on others' choices, we should encourage and support each family in living a life that allows for a functional family.

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I was both a working woman/mother and then a long time SAHM before reentering the workforce. There is no war on SAHM's. Not even a minor one. In fact, in today's economy, with unemployment being so high, many women are being SAHM's whether they like it or not.

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The trouble is Fundies and other conservative Chrisitans teach one way is the only way. Even secular society as a whoke thinks you lack values if you aren't doing somethng on the timeline of everyone else or choose not to do them. You get labeled immature and materialistic. For me, I detest the public. Luckily (for now) I can stay home and write while DH works. Others are more extroverted and loathe the idea of being home all day. I read blogs and articles from SAHMS who constantly attack other women who aren't chasing toddlers all day and a house. They accuse thse women of beingn selfish and missing out. Why force extroverted women to stay home or vice versa?

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I was both a working woman/mother and then a long time SAHM before reentering the workforce. There is no war on SAHM's. Not even a minor one. In fact, in today's economy, with unemployment being so high, many women are being SAHM's whether they like it or not.

The only war on SAHMs that I know of is being conducted by lawmakers. If you give up paid work in order to care for your children, and this puts you on welfare, you are "lazy." (Never mind that the exact same work, if done for pay, would be a full-time job with daily overtime!) If you turn down a job that would make you ineligible for welfare but leave you with pennies on the dollar after paying for child care, you are "lazy." If you want to wait to get a job until your name FINALLY crawls to the top of the waiting list for subsidized child care, you are "lazy." And when you get that job and something bad happens that requires you to go be with your children during work hours, you are "lazy"--I mean, you "don't have a work ethic."

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drjamesdobson.org/articles/pray-for-america/message-to-husbands-of-homemakers

What an ass.

SOTDRT fail.

I grew up with a stay-at-home-mum, and I really appreciate everything she's done for me. She made that choice because it was what she wanted, and it was a good thing for all our family. I would just like it if fundies would acknowledge I have the right to make the opposite choice.

There is a lot of criticism of women whether they work inside or outside the home, but what these idiots don't realise is that it's the result of a patriarchal society that thinks it's OK to publicly judge women's personal choices. If we accept that women have the intelligence to make their own choices, then we'll move on from a culture that criticises every little thing women do.

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In addition to the SODRT fail in Dobson's Proverbs 31 spiel, there is a massive failure to understand that the Proverbs 31 woman was a strong business woman who went out into the world of that day and did what she needed to do to support her family.

Gah.

Dobson is another one who seems to be losing it as he ages. He should just stop. Now.

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I'm a stay at home mom/housewife. Today, I dropped my child off at school, went to three different grocery stores, came home, made two batches of yeast rolls, two pies, a batch of cookies, a batch of hummus, and dinner, and I cleaned the kitchen.

Since no one tried to stop me and no one scoffed at or mocked me, should I feel left out? I mean, I want to be part of this war, too! How does one become a victim? Would screaming, "Help, help, I'm being oppressed!" as I'm washing the dishes work?

We can try squeezing you in on June 17th 2014, please have your moat ready. Or send you a garden gnome holding a small poster saying "Down with this sort of thing" that you can place in your front-yard. Alternatively, we can send you an unfriendly message on your facebook wall, so you can get all your friends involved. Due to time-constraints, all three aren't possible. Sorry, but we've got a lot of oppressing to do.

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It makes me SO HAPPY that FotF kicked Dobson out. They are still conservative asswipes but they are slightly less evil since they saw the writing on the wall and decided to be kinder, gentler conservative asswipes.

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We can try squeezing you in on June 17th 2014, please have your moat ready. Or send you a garden gnome holding a small poster saying "Down with this sort of thing" that you can place in your front-yard. Alternatively, we can send you an unfriendly message on your facebook wall, so you can get all your friends involved. Due to time-constraints, all three aren't possible. Sorry, but we've got a lot of oppressing to do.

I get to cook, clean, homeschool KidSobe, and *now* I have to fight a war on top of it all?! Cripes, ok. Pencil me in for whenever you've got a mo, and let me know when, OK?

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"Judeo-Christian? Really, James....er, Dr. Dobson? I don't hear many Jewish voices rising up with yours in this context."

I thought that in Eastern Europe and Russia the Jewish women ran the businesses so that the husband's could study Torah without the hindrance of having to support the family.

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Yeah, I was a stay-at-home mom till some big hairy feminists showed up at my door with Uzis and demanded that I get divorced and find a job.

Yeah, that was me and my posse. In my spare time between my evil job and neglecting my home and children I like to terrorize the local SAHMs. Since Samurai Sarah is busy right now, I'll volunteer to storm the moats of any SAH-FJers.

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Well, with the war on Easter just over, and the war on Christmas needing organizing, the gay agenda needing pushing, plus all the normal persecuting stuff that needs doing... I'd say to expect the army on 3rd Jan 2014 at around 14.23 hrs, departing again at 14.49 hrs. If we can't make it to your moat, will an insulting tweet do? Sorry about that, time is a bit limited, and the war on SAHMs came as a surprise. We can't let all the other stuff slide because of this. Terribly sorry about that, hope you understand.

Damn I'm not going to be a SAHM by that point. Can't I get worked in any earlier so I can feel really persecuted? I also don't do twitter, so can you make that a hateful FB message? We really need to work together to make this war happen.

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I get to cook, clean, homeschool KidSobe, and *now* I have to fight a war on top of it all?! Cripes, ok. Pencil me in for whenever you've got a mo, and let me know when, OK?

I know it's all terribly inconvenient, and we really don't have time for this, but we're trying to make it happen. Is September 23rd 2014 good for you? If not, send us your phone-number so we can make a scolding anonymous phone-call. Alternatively, we can combine it with the war on x-mas by sending you a postcard of Mrs Claus working? Or you could download our war-chants to play in the comfort of your own home? Sorry, I know this is all a bit slap-dash, and it's a tad embarrassing, but we really need your help to get this war off the ground!

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Damn I'm not going to be a SAHM by that point. Can't I get worked in any earlier so I can feel really persecuted? I also don't do twitter, so can you make that a hateful FB message? We really need to work together to make this war happen.

Oh dear. I am sorry. Maybe you could meet us halfway and make a few suggestions about a hateful FB message? The best we have so far is "Down with this sort of thing" and "Careful now". We also could send you an offensive centrepiece for your dinner-table. Would that work?

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I am a SAHM (well, a SAHM who is also completing an MA but whatevs). I have never felt attacked or that someone was warring against me. These people have serious delusions.

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?????

I have been a homemaker/SAHM for the majority of my married life. A Christian homemaker/SAHM until recently. Not once in all these (going on) 22 years have I ever witnessed or experienced anything even remotely resembling a war on SAHM's. Everyone I have come across has been supportive of the role. Several women have even expressed their wishes to do the same. This tripe that they spew is nothing short of their persecution complex on overdrive. Get a life!

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I think the centerpiece would work best for me. Who do I contact once I am no longer a SAHM so I can get involved in the war against SAHMs?

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I am a SAHM (well, a SAHM who is also completing an MA but whatevs). I have never felt attacked or that someone was warring against me.

U R DOIN IT WRONG!!!!!111!!

:penguin-no:

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I think the centerpiece would work best for me. Who do I contact once I am no longer a SAHM so I can get involved in the war against SAHMs?

Currently setting up soooper secret headquarters. We'll put the address into the centrepiece. :)

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Oh god, this. If anyone devalues the work women have to do around the house, it's not working women, it's men who don't appreciate it. The individual tasks might not be that hard (despite having a working mother and being educated in public schools, I could do all of them), but it does add up and can be just as stressful as a "real job," especially if you have a gaggle of little ones under your feet wherever you go.

This. Working women tend to know the value of the work around the house, because many of us do that as well. (Yes, sadly my current headship has fur and claws, and just refuses to assist me with any chores that do not directly involve him being petted or fed.)

It's the pity party aspect that drives me, because when working women complain about issues related to workplaces - like some of the ones jenny_islander brings up - then we're "getting what we asked for".

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We can try squeezing you in on June 17th 2014, please have your moat ready. Or send you a garden gnome holding a small poster saying "Down with this sort of thing" that you can place in your front-yard. Alternatively, we can send you an unfriendly message on your facebook wall, so you can get all your friends involved. Due to time-constraints, all three aren't possible. Sorry, but we've got a lot of oppressing to do.

father_ted_001_003_002_0011_zps207ad829.jpg

And, because I found it while searching for the one above and it seemed suited to this site (and it's one of my favourite ever quotes from Father Ted, after "how did you become a priest, anyway? Collect twelve crisp packets and send them in?"):

tumblr_ljahikLk8V1qa713ko1_500_zpse010bfbb.png

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