Homeschoolers Anonymous

[tehgoobster]

Homeschoolers Anonymous is an interesting new website with stories from people who've experienced homeschooling in a very rigid, fundamentalist environment. There's even a story from Michael Farris' nephew. (Michael Farris is the founder of Patrick Henry College.) From HA's About page:

Homeschoolers Anonymous is a cooperative project by former homeschoolers. We are an inclusive community interested in sharing our experiences growing up in the conservative, Christian homeschooling subculture. From the Quiverfull movement to the betrothal/courtship mentality to Generation Joshua and the dominionist attitudes of HSLDA, we are survivors. And we are standing together to make our voices heard. We want the world to hear our stories and we want to give hope to those who are still immersed in that world. There is a way to break free and be yourself.

We do not advocate any one particular path — some of us are religious, some are not; some of us are politically liberal, others are conservative; some of us might homeschool our children in the future, others want nothing to do with homeschooling anymore. We are not interested in championing any particular doctrine.

We are not standing against homeschooling as an educational method. But we are standing up for those who have been hurt by certain oppressive groups and ways of thinking within homeschooling. Above all, we want to provide healing to other survivors, hope for those still suffering, and knowledge to those unaware of the inner workings of homeschooling.

Thought y'all might find it interesting. Here's the link:

homeschoolersanonymous.wordpress.com

[gustava]

Thanks for the link.

[dianapavelovna]

The Jonathan Farris post is a good read. He mentioned several times that he didn't want to "write a book" regarding his experiences, but I'd read that shit.

The closing sentence was particularly apt, I thought:

Stop ‘raising children’, start raising responsible and educated adults who will not only be beneficial to society, but understand how to be a part of it.

[thoughtful]

I just found a series they ran last month about corporal punishment. It's entitled To Break Down a Child, and is a bunch of posts gathered with permission from various sources.

Some of the articles I'd seen before, but some were new to me.

http://homeschoolersanonymous.wordpress ... line-week/

[LittleMama]

Is there a Public School Anonymous? I'd like to join that one.

[Effie]

Is there a Public School Anonymous? I'd like to join that one.

If the school has failed you, why would you want to be anonymous about that?

[LittleMama]

If the school has failed you, why would you want to be anonymous about that?

Oh I wouldn't say the school failed me... But I bet there are lots of interesting stories to share.

[Mompom]

That's a fun idea. I have lots of public school stories to share.

[Effie]

I'm just curious why you wouldn't want to be public about if a certain school has mistreated you. That's one way to assure something similar won't happen again. Since what's being discussed at H.A. is deathly abuse and serious neglect, I'm assuming you are talking about an equivalance to that.

[dilannsmom]

The closing sentence was particularly apt, I thought:

Even as a public school educator this is my philosophy...in my estimation it isn't learning reading, writing and arithmetic for the sake of knowing how to do these things. Instead, children need to learn these things to be productive members of society. (except maybe for calculus--who really uses that shit anyway?)

[Mama Mia]

I'm just curious why you wouldn't want to be public about if a certain school has mistreated you. That's one way to assure something similar won't happen again. Since what's being discussed at H.A. is deathly abuse and serious neglect, I'm assuming you are talking about an equivalance to that.

You seem tobe implying that abuse and neglect don't happen in public schools. Why would you think that?

[Effie]

You seem tobe implying that abuse and neglect don't happen in public schools. Why would you think that?

Eh what?! That thought has never crossed my mind. What bothers me is someone trying to take away the seriousness of the deathly violence by "hey, let's join an equivalance where we can share our funny stories". That pisses me off. Also why the need to be anonymous if you mean that you have been mistreated? Will you be excommunicated by your family? Will you be disowned? It's quite understandable that at H.A. you are anonymous cause the stories involve your parents and siblings. Whether you want to expose your family should be up to you. But if a school has mistreated you and you no longer go there, nor have your family there, what kind lof reprissals do you have to fear by going out publicly and telling your story? Some dislikes and annoyance maybe? But so what if you know that future children might have to go through the same hell as you unless you speak out?

[LittleMama]

Eh what?! That thought has never crossed my mind. What bothers me is someone trying to take away the seriousness of the deathly violence by "hey, let's join an equivalance where we can share our funny stories". That pisses me off. Also why the need to be anonymous if you mean that you have been mistreated? Will you be excommunicated by your family? Will you be disowned? It's quite understandable that at H.A. you are anonymous cause the stories involve your parents and siblings. Whether you want to expose your family should be up to you. But if a school has mistreated you and you no longer go there, nor have your family there, what kind lof reprissals do you have to fear by going out publicly and telling your story? Some dislikes and annoyance maybe? But so what if you know that future children might have to go through the same hell as you unless you speak out?

Well I do have some interesting stories to share about my public school days.

"The public school system" can't fail anyone just like the "homeschool system" can't fail anyone. It is teachers, atmosphere, curriculum, students, supervisors, that can cause issues and abuse, in both situations.

Sorry if I am wrong but I feel like you have now stated "you went to public school! What could you have to say? And if you do, it better be good or else." Wow, thanks. I think that alone says why being anonymous is important for some, when some assault might be crushing for the person you are bound to have someone say "Oh, but it wasn't rape! You are over thinking it!"

Didn't mean to offend you so much with my comments, I'll back out now. Have a good day!

[Mama Mia]

Your assumption that any public school stories of abuse/neglect must be "funny stories" is pretty telling of what you think. Why an Annonymous group? Why not? People have Annonymous groups for all sorts of things to help them process and vent. Those same people might also be telling their story publically, or they might not be ready to, or have already. Obviously the homeschool people are more likely to have serious on-going abuse, because it is easier to hide it. But kids in public school are still sometimes molested, or beaten (often legally) or treated like trash or severely bullied.

[formergothardite]

I didn't get the impression that Little Mama had suffered any sort of horrific abuse at public school. She even said it didn't fail her just that she thought there would be "interesting" stories. The stories on HA aren't interesting, they are horrifying.

[Mama Mia]

I didn't get the impression that Little Mama had suffered any sort of horrific abuse at public school. She even said it didn't fail her just that she thought there would be "interesting" stories. The stories on HA aren't interesting, they are horrifying.

You're right, my bad. I didn't notice her wording the first time I saw it, and was projecting about the abuses in public school one of my kids suffered.

[mrs]

Chris Jeub wrote an article for H.A. about his family and legalism.

The photo with the post shows many of the Jeud daughters wearing head coverings?

homeschoolersanonymous.wordpress.com/2013/10/28/stiff-necked-legalism-by-chris-jeub/

[GeoBQn]

It may seem odd to some of you that we are featuring a post by Chris. He has a bunch of kids and his family has appeared on reality TV. He might seem like one of “those people.†But I have immense respect for him and I personally believe that he understands a core part of HA’s message: that ideology should never take the place of love and humanity in either family or education.

What the hell? Does this guy not know about Chris Jeub's treatment of Wendy's two eldest daughters?

[lemonhead]

What the hell? Does this guy not know about Chris Jeub's treatment of Wendy's two eldest daughters?

Yeah, the Chris Jeub post sort of soured me on HA. I didn't know much about the Jeubs until I did some research on them yesterday (after reading HA) and came away feeling disgusted by the guy, and Wendy too, to some extent. The HA site owner(s) lost a lot of credibility in my mind by setting Jeub up as a leader to be admired.

I was also seriously annoyed that he managed to work in at least three references to his book--so obviously trying to get people to buy it :shifty-kitty:

edited for fomatting

[ILoveJellybeans]

That was unexpected. That is one website I could never imagine him writing for. I do think that he is right about legalism being a problem amongst homeschooling fundie families, but I have never seen him as doing anything but the same other fundies do.

Lets hear from his oldest daughters now too...

[Buzzard]

Yeah, the Chris Jeub post sort of soured me on HA. I didn't know much about the Jeubs until I did some research on them yesterday (after reading HA) and came away feeling disgusted by the guy, and Wendy too, to some extent. The HA site owner(s) lost a lot of credibility in my mind by setting Jeub up as a leader to be admired.

I was also seriously annoyed that he managed to work in at least three references to his book--so obviously trying to get people to buy it :shifty-kitty:

edited for fomatting

Damn! And here I was thinking that they were "like minded" and could fit in well here... :angry-banghead:

[mrs]

Damn! And here I was thinking that they were "like minded" and could fit in well here... :angry-banghead:

Should H.A. remove the post?

I still think H.A. could be a good resource.

Edited to clarify.

[docmom]

Is there any chance H.A. will remove the post or explain their reasons for posting?

I still think H.A. could be a good resource.

I agree. I wouldn't throw the baby out with the bathwater. I made the mistake of reading some of the stories about Pearl style upbringings and am just speechless. The one where the girl was forced to listen to all of her younger siblings being beaten (including a one year old- the description is heartbreaking) was particularly difficult to read. A place where people feel comfortable posting these incredibly painful memories and encourage others has to have some redemptive value.

[lemonhead]

Should H.A. remove the post?

I still think H.A. could be a good resource.

Edited to clarify.

No, I don't think they should remove it--I'm not a proponent of censoring content, even on a site that is supposed to be a supportive environment for survivors. We're all at different points on our paths, and part of recovery is learning to respect others' positions and recognize/tolerate potential triggers.

I've read so much on HA that deeply resonated with me, stories that I could have written, and it's so healing to realize that it wasn't *just me* if that makes sense. I'll continue to read there, but now with the understanding that the owner(s) may not be a reliable narrator, so to speak.

[formergothardite]

Good grief that was a thinly veiled attempt to sell his book wasn't it? Has anyone tried to leave a comment about his older daughters that he dumped and treated like crap?