"The Bible" Premieres Tonight on History

[FeministShrew]

I haven't watched this, but hearing about the accents makes me think of Eddie Izzard. In one of hios old routines he did god's voice as James Mason & Noah as Sean Connery. Funny stuff. I think I'd rather watch a few Eddie Izzard dvds than anything about the bible, anyway!

[infooverload]

What are we going to do tonight? The same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try to take over the world! That's what I thought of when I saw the Peter/Jesus conversation. Haven't decided yet if I'm going to watch it. My husband is religious, so we probably will. My commentary will drive him as nuts as it did during the republican convention. There will be profanity, I'm sure.

I read this and chuckled since your relationship with your husband sounds familar when trying to watch anything religious. I tend to add in commentary and I get the royal stink eye. I tend to remember okay he is viewing it through the religious lens and not the rational lens.

[OkToBeTakei]

I couldn't get past the accents. I am going to try and finish it, but these was just something so off about it. I mean, in this day and age, you couldn't even TRY to use the proper accents? It's like the people who made it were like "I know this happened in Egypt, but I think it will really resonate better if they sound Scottish." Seriously.

Hey who said Noah was not from Glasgow? :lol:

To sound 'PROPER' it would need to be in subtitles. Still better than years of American Moses' for me. But I am Scottish so that is my default accent :P

[caito]

Lawd. We saw a commercial for this at Walmart. It was on every single screen in the electronics section. I had to stifle a giggle. I mourn the loss of the real History Channel.

[ShadowyOne]

Lawd. We saw a commercial for this at Walmart. It was on every single screen in the electronics section. I had to stifle a giggle. I mourn the loss of the real History Channel.

It went the way of the real Learning Channel. Ugh.

[Avalondaughter]

she looks amazing for 51!

I am clueless on this. Does it actually say in the Bible that Mary was 14?

[GolightlyGrrl]

From what I heard on the "Today" show this morning, "The Bible" got really high ratings, but take that with a grain of salt. I'm sure some people watched it for the snark factor.

[Just_Jane]

I turned it on and made it about 5 minutes before I turned it right off. I did watch Vikings though.

[RachelB]

It's not that it's impossible to make a good movie based on the Bible, but I think it could only be through focusing on one story told with careful attention to character and emotion--like any great movie. When movies have tried to take on the entire Bible, the scope of it means that those elements are usually sacrificed.

I loved Pasolini's "Gospel According to St. Matthew." Italian realism, lots of mesmerizing close-ups of faces, and a focus on Jesus's ministry, as opposed to his death. But yeah, that's part of one book of the bible.

[kaetrin]

I am clueless on this. Does it actually say in the Bible that Mary was 14?

It doesn't say that, but I think people have suggested it based on the average age of betrothal at the time. The legal age for marriage for girls in Roman law was 12. I don't know how Jewish practices might have differed, but probably not by much.

[StandingWide]

Has doug phillips is a tool been a viking yet?

I don't know if he's been a viking, but I think he might be Moses!

[Claddagh]

I don't know if he's been a viking, but I think he might be Moses!

Scary thing is I was thinking the exact same thing when watching! :shock: :?

[Buzzard]

So last week's episode was a runaway hit. I'm wondering if the present showing of Sampson and Delilah as an inter racial couple having premarital couple will be as acceptable.

[tabitha2]

I am clueless on this. Does it actually say in the Bible that Mary was 14?

in one of the books that did make the cut into the bible it mentions mary as 17.

[hearyoume08]

Even my dad who loves this sort of thing couldn't watch it.

[Jiraffe Jirl]

Did anyone else notice the handsex graphics overload in the Christian Mingle commercials?

[VooDooChild]

Was it their intention to make it over-the-top cheesy? The patriarchs come across as mentally ill. I just don't have the words......it's so....dumb.

[debrand]

Now I wish I had watched it to mock the cheese. Like some on this thread, I have a religious husband and I don't like to hurt his feelings and I would NOT be able to stop myself from mocking it.

They won't do Judges 19-21. In that story, a man shoves his concubine out of the house to be gang raped until she dies. He cuts her body up and sends her to the other tribes of Israel who agree to make war on the Benjamins(Benjamites?). After making a vow to not give their daughters in marriage to the Benjamits(Benjaminies?), they slaughter a lot of people. God tells them it is hunky dory to make war on an entire group of people for the actions of a few. However, the other tribes begin to feel sorry for the poor unmarried males in the tribe of Benjamin and wage another war to find war brides. When those aren't enough brides, they convince the men to steal a bunch of women dancing in their fields. In the bible, rape is evil except for when it isn't :?

I'm strange because I'm an atheist who actually likes the bible. The Old Testament is a dark book that depicts very flawed humans. The narrative tales are interesting reading. I'd love a movie that explored the darker aspects of the bible in a nonbiased way.

[Full enough quiver]

Yeah, I basically can't be in the room if my husband is watching it. The urge to snark is too strong. He wasn't too happy when I told him that the story of Abram and Isaac was either metaphorical, made up, or his god is a fucking sociopath.

[twin2]

Hi, I'm Twin2 and I have a confession. I have been watching this, every week and I can't stop.

But I can't help myself, it is so over-the-top, I can't stop myself from watching. It has got to be the most cheesetastic thing I've watched since "The Betty Broderick Story" on Lifetime. It is like someone made a cheese sandwich by taking two 1lb chunks of cheddar, slathering them with Cheese Wiz and putting a block of Velveeta in between.

Someone, help me. I think I need an intervention.

[PennySycamore]

Hi, I'm Twin2 and I have a confession. I have been watching this, every week and I can't stop.

But I can't help myself, it is so over-the-top, I can't stop myself from watching. It has got to be the most cheesetastic thing I've watched since "The Betty Broderick Story" on Lifetime. It is like someone made a cheese sandwich by taking two 1lb chunks of cheddar, slathering them with Cheese Wiz and putting a block of Velveeta in between.

Someone, help me. I think I need an intervention.

I should share that with my middle daughter. She was watching the second episode the other week and she also loved "The Betty Broderick Story". I think she'll love the comparison!

[Claddagh]

I've been watching it too.

Some of the acting is so over the top or out there it's nuts. Then there's the scene where the guy get his ear cut off and just steps forwrd with this grimace and groan.

Jesus is defrauding.

[GiGi_41]

My other half is watching it, but it is way to inappropriate for my kiddo to watch. It's so violent and graphic.

And I can't watch it because I'd snark and the SO doesn't like it when I point out the reasons why the Bible is flawed.

[tabitha2]

er,why is mary post menopausal? :shock:

[justmissedquiver]

er,why is mary post menopausal? :shock:

I'm watching for the wonderful cheesetastic-ness. After about a month of lurking this is my first post :)

If Mary had Jesus around 12-14, adding 33 years would make her 47-ish. That would be young for menopause, but not completely unheard of.