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HELP ME... about to beat this fundie asshole!!!


Slt

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Me, I'd go for the jugular, but I'm nasty like that. Something like:

Dear Chris, if men are supposed to be the providers then maybe you should provide your wife with prenatal care. As a Registered Nurse, I can't tell you how important it is and how many lives we save with it. Perhaps helping people IS the role God gave me. As a Republican you must know the US has the best healthcare system in the world so surely, as her provider/protector, you will encourage your wife to participate. Second, please stop referring to me as lazy when your pictures show such a slothful lifestyle. Perhaps if you spent your time more wisely, instead of posting pictures of the disgusting food you eat, and posting lies about women, you could conquer your morbid obesity and provide for your family in a way that doesnt depend on them getting your life insurance when you die of your gluttony in a few years. See what God did there? He put me, a nurse, in your life! And here you thought women had no purpose. Hope this helps!

Oh my dear God, this is the best. I totally WANTED to do something like that (but wouldn't have been able to come up with such a wonderfully snarky response in the heat of the moment!), but my husband was already mad I'd participated in the conversation as far as I did with him- that asshole can't be changed.

I have that problem- I tend to argue with idiots to try to "show them the light," even though I know it won't work... and then I get mad! :lol:

UGH, the food pictures are another thing that gets me! You can't afford to send your wife to the doctor, yet you brag about the $100 lunches you take? She isn't allowed new clothes, but you can go out to eat several times a week with your buddies (without her, no less) and to the movies? You have really got to be kidding me...

ETA: Another thought.

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"I have some inlaws who I can't discuss politics with at all. No point. No matter how wrong they are on the facts, they never believe they are spouting untruths."

I have a brother and sister in law like that. As my mom says you aren't going to change them. I realize that, but I do enjoy twisting their ignorant archiac views around to their faces whenever possible and saying something that makes their jaws drop.

It takes so little to do that-- generally I'm the one who is stunned by what they say. One inlaw couldn't believe that I would not vote for Sarah Palin--ever, no matter who ran against her, for any office, ever in the history of the world--not the first time, not the election she didn't run in last time--ever. The woman kept coming back and coming up with more and more ridiculous candidates to see if I'd vote for Palin. (still no)

One is a politician, his latest jaw drop moment (my jaw dropping) is he is not sure he believes in abortion for tubal pregnancies. Certainly he is against them in every other situation, but is uncertain about these.

:shock: :shock: :? :shock: :shock:

Mostly, hubs and I just stay the hell away from these people.

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I'm glad you're going to stay friends with her. She's going to need it.

I'm a public health nurse. She sounds like lots of clients I have. It's hard to watch someone deal with a crappy partner. I've got oodles of experience in convincing people to leave abusive situations/shitty partners. Let me know if you need some good one-liners/questions to put to her.

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I wouldn't argue with him. You will never, ever change his mind and he may block any further contact between you and his wife which would hurt her in the long term. He'll find out pretty quickly how much an uninsured birth will cost him. Many hospitals require some sort of upfront payment before they'll accept you. If she shows up in labor without insurance and birth isn't imminent the hospital may transfer her to a public hospital and I suspect he won't like that.

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I have a friend who was in an abusive marriage for years. It's a slow boat (Hell, it's an ocean liner), and it won't turn on a dime. I stayed friends with her, and kept supporting her, but was honest when what he was doing was wrong, even when she argued. I kept it clear that I cared about her and the children, and that this was not OK, and it was abuse. Eventually, cracks started to appear. Little by little, she started to see the light. (For her, the catalyst was when she started running. Becoming strong showed her she was worthy, when he'd emotionally beat her into the ground for years.)

They are in the middle of divorcing (she lives in France, so it takes forfreakingever). She is a completely new woman, and her kids are starting to shake off the layers and layers of garbage he's heaped on them for years. The courts sided with her completely. They have a new chance.

Don't give up on her. It's not a quick fix. But that doesn't mean she will never see the light.

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Holy crap, I just noticed I'm Level Eleventy!!1!!11!

That's hilarious!

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There are many fundies who qualify for government assistance (in the form of Medicaid for their medical care, food stamps, etc) who refuse to take it because it is "not trusting God." They are okay taking loads of assistance from others, but it is looked down upon to take anything from the government in their circles.

I tried to explain to her that in a best case scenario, her bills will be around 10k for prenatal care and delivery, and God forbid anything worse- c-section easily 30k (mine was), NICU stays easily into the hundreds of thousands. She got very, very angry with me. I told her in no uncertain terms that if my husband forbid me to do that, I'd go around his back and do it anyways. For the health of my baby and myself.

He tricked her into not getting private insurance before pregnancy and when she "fell" pregnant, he told her he's been looking around for a good plan- I tried to explain to her that private insurances will NOT insure an already-pregnant person for pregnancy (it isn't like employee sponsored health plans where you can't have a pre-existing condition), she didn't believe me and told me to never, ever talk to her about insurance or doctor's visits again. I am very worried about her health, but will respect her wishes to not mention it again- as a nurse, I know how terrible not getting prenatal care can be- she's been pinning a lot of stuff about homebirth, which is illegal in our state without a doc, onto her Pinterest... so, I am wondering if her jackass husband is forcing an unassisted homebirth on her. Time will tell!

You did the best you could. If she wants to sweeten her Kool Ade with dumbass sugar, you can't do anything about it. And that is a bitch.

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This guy is horrible!! How did your friend get involved w/ this guy?

She met him on Christianmingle.com. She had dreams of being a submissive wife, and I am sure he picked up very quickly on her weaknesses like that type usually does.

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Well, it's official. She "unfriended" me on Facebook. She has my number, I have hers and she didn't block me completely. I will try to keep an eye out for her as much as I can, but it's obvious her choice is made. Hope she'll call me if she ever wants/needs to escape.

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I'm glad you're going to stay friends with her. She's going to need it.

I'm a public health nurse. She sounds like lots of clients I have. It's hard to watch someone deal with a crappy partner. I've got oodles of experience in convincing people to leave abusive situations/shitty partners. Let me know if you need some good one-liners/questions to put to her.

I could use them. Got a friend of my own in a questionable relationship.

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