An open letter to 'gay' teens

[MajorMajor]

My aunt (Baptist, lives in Texas, watches Fox, need I say more?) posted this on Facebook today. It's an open letter to "gay" teens. I can't post highlights from my phone but rest assured it will probably make your head explode with rage.

charismanews.com/opinion/38396-an-open-letter-to-gay-teens

I can't even think of words to articulate the level of bullshit encapsulated in this article. I think it makes me so angry because I know this is the exact response most "Christian" parents have toward their gay kids (I guess it's a step up from just kicking them out). It makes me so sad for these kids. I can't imagine telling my son that he is going to hell for being himself.

[Minerva]

Sometimes people post things on facebook that make me want to add their emails to the most lewd mailing lists I can find. I wouldn't actually do it, but with stuff like that, it's really tempting.

[Full enough quiver]

I have a letter to gay teens. It goes like this-

Dear gay teens,

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You are no better or worse than anyone else. Being gay is just a variation of normal like being left handed or having red hair. When you choose to enter into a sexual relationship, you have the same worries as a heterosexual teen (except maybe pregnancy) respect yourself, protect yourself, and enjoy yourself.

Signed, a mom who would be proud if her kids had the courage to be out and proud if they happened to be gay

Ps. You're not going to hell

[Vex]

That made me shake, I'm so angry.

To me, heterosexual sex doesn't make sense. But I don't ever tell people they're wrong. Something written thousands of years ago said it was bad. It's in the old testament. Do you avoid mixing fabrics? Do you abhor shellfish? Probably not, so why the fuck do you focus on that one thing?

I can't even string together a coherent thought right now.

[Carla Bruni]

As horrible as this is, I think this is still a million times better than many other "statements" some "parents" would make towards their gay children - i.e., disowning, ceasing contact, barring from family functions, wishing death, etc.

Aside: I do wonder sometimes how sad it must be to hate yourself so much that you view every single thing that could possibly give you pleasure in life as an awful deadly sin. Going through life with an "I'm a sinner" banner must be tough. Much easier to just live and let live, make sexytimez, dance, curse, and wear anything you want :mrgreen:

[crassy]

I am not usually one for violence but I would really like to punch this Matt Barber person. In the throat. With my car.

[doggie]

You always notice it is only men they seem to focus on. Why are fundies so obsessed with overs sex lies? Remember judge not lest you be judged.

[Guest Anonymous]

As horrible as this is, I think this is still a million times better than many other "statements" some "parents" would make towards their gay children - i.e., disowning, ceasing contact, barring from family functions, wishing death, etc.

Yup, telling someone they are going to hell unless they decide never to have a satisfying sexual/intimate relationship with another person is a whole lot better than being barred from family functions. Bless his heart.

(Also: strengthen his heart, dear jeebus, because it sounds like our lawyer friend has not yet grasped the possibility that it could also be one of his daughters that is headed for homosexual hell).

[Effie]

I don't know what's worse though. This letter or the letter that headhearthand-preacher wrote to his hypothetically gay son. headhearthand.org/blog/2012/08/08/what-letter-would-you-write-to-a-gay-son/

[Guest Anonymous]

I don't know what's worse though. This letter or the letter that headhearthand-preacher wrote to his hypothetically gay son. headhearthand.org/blog/2012/08/08/what-letter-would-you-write-to-a-gay-son/

Why do we need to establish a scale of best/worst ways to disown a child? They are all fuckers and their children all deserve so much better.

[lilith]

Yup, telling someone they are going to hell unless they decide never to have a satisfying sexual/intimate relationship with another person is a whole lot better than being barred from family functions. Bless his heart.

(Also: strengthen his heart, dear jeebus, because it sounds like our lawyer friend has not yet grasped the possibility that it could also be one of his daughters that is headed for homosexual hell).

No, cause in their world women are never really gay, it's just that they haven't met the right man yet..... I'll never understand the gender double standard with perceptions of homosexuality, to the point that female homosexuality want even recognised as existing in medical and psychiatric texts for hundreds if years.

[debrand]

I love you. I neither judge you nor condemn you. I accept you and I would die for you.

I really don't care about religious love. It is different and inferior to normal human love. Religious love tells people that they are worthy of torture that lasts an eternity. I don't want that kind of love because it sounds a lot like hate.

But you are not “gay.â€

Yes, you may be physically attracted to people of the same sex, but how you act on those attractions is entirely your choice.

That is the definition of gay. You can be gay and never act on your desires but your still homosexual. Having sex doesn't make you gay anymore than having sex makes you heterosexual.

But you are flawed—you are a sinner.

I am flawed—I am a sinner.

I get tired of hearing this type of reasoning. It seems to suggest that just because the speaker admits he/she has faults they are free to tell other people of their faults. This goes against their own religion. Jesus said, before you remove the speck from someone else's eye, take out the plank from your own. So, if you believe you are sinning yourself, shut your mouth and clean your own life up. Don't worry about what other people are doing.

Every major world religion, thousands of years of history and uncompromising human biology declare this objective reality from the rooftops

.

This man has never read history

Some say, “But Jesus never mentioned homosexuality.†First, we don’t know this. We have no record in Scripture of Him specifically addressing homosexual sin, but neither do we have a record of His addressing incest, bestiality or other sexual sins.

The writer is asking us to follow his holy book but he wants to read words into his own savior's mouth. From that point of view, Jesus didn't tell us that we shouldn't kill our neighbor and kidnap his children so maybe he meant that we could but I want being peaceful to be a sin so I'm going to make guesses about his opinion about the matter. All we can say about Jesus and homosexuality was that it wasn't an important enough matter for him to mention. Considering that homosexuality was permitted among the Roman soldiers, Jesus would have been aware of it and probably would have said something.

In fact, homosexual sin is expressly identified in both the Old and New Testaments as being among the list of sins that, if committed without repentance, will prevent you from “inheriting the kingdom of God.

And according to Paul if you follow one part of the law, you have to follow it all. The law says that virgins who don't scream loud enough during a rape are to be stoned.

You are being used. Adult homosexual activists with a political agenda are using you as a pawn to achieve selfish goals in a dangerous political game

I think that it is far more likely that homophobic Christians(not all Christians) will use the child to advance his agenda that either homosexuals can suddenly change into straight individuals or that they can live without sex.

Love without truth is hate.

No it isn't. It might be whimpy love but it certainly isn't hate. Hate is telling someone you love that they should live without any meaningful sexual relationship just because of their parents' interpretation of the bible.

Consider, for instance, that according to the CDC this path will lead you, boys, to a one-in-five chance of contracting HIV/AIDS. The CDC also found that 64 percent of all syphilis cases strike “gay†males and that homosexual behavior leads to astronomical risk of nearly all other forms of STD

CONDOMS

[Burris]

An Open Letter to Gay Teens

A lot of people may tell you that you're unnatural; that the attraction you feel to members of the same sex is chosen rather than inborn. They are wrong: There are examples all throughout nature of homosexual behavior in other animals – and, as even the Bible says, there are some ways wherein we have no advantage over the beasts.

Indeed our behavior as a species has often been worse than bestial, because we have the power to reason and reflect on our actions. Most people have an advanced sense of empathy that they must actively deaden to commit atrocities and other acts of hate.

Unfortunately, you are members of a group a lot of people have chosen to hate merely because your orientation, which I personally believe inborn, differs from their own. They'll try to sway you. They'll call you names. For the unluckiest of you, they may even try terrible ways of 'reeducating' that you may become straight even as they themselves are straight.

They did not chose to be heterosexual, however, any more than you chose to be homosexual. They chose, instead, to be bigots – a conscious effort on their part; a behavior designed to erase homosexuality (and, by extension, homosexuals). They may be pitiless, relentless, cruel.

But you are not beholden to them, nor need you be mastered by their prejudice. It's difficult, especially the more brutal the treatment you receive at their hands, but not impossible: You can beat them by retaining the only freedom they cannot take away from you.

They will attempt to attack you at the core and corrupt your interior life with their hate. Alas, some teens have succumbed to despair as a result, mutilating themselves or dying by suicide. Certainly other minorities in hostile environments have done the same.

But your personalities and intelligence and interests, and the deepest parts of your interior lives – you can defend these; resist where resistance cannot be seen. Stand up again when they beat you down. You can.

It helps to remember, first, that you are not alone. Not only are there numerous other homosexuals, but plenty of heterosexuals who do not begrudge your existence. And secondly, it does get better as you grow older, stronger, and more experienced.

And finally, it is important to remember that the hatred some of these people express is, as I mentioned previously, their choice, and so it is also primarily their problem; their character flaw, not yours.

They do not own your soul, nor your mind, nor your heart. They are not worthy of being feared, even if their actions are truly fearsome. No matter what they do to you, then – no matter what they try, however cruel – they are in the wrong by decision. And you are not. You are NOT!

You were gay by birth. Own it when you can. It's a part of you, no different than hair or eye color, race or parentage. It's a normal variation.

Find love where you can get it; there's little enough in the world.

[2xx1xy1JD]

That made me shake, I'm so angry.

To me, heterosexual sex doesn't make sense. But I don't ever tell people they're wrong. Something written thousands of years ago said it was bad. It's in the old testament. Do you avoid mixing fabrics? Do you abhor shellfish? Probably not, so why the fuck do you focus on that one thing?

I can't even string together a coherent thought right now.

So, how to do respond when the person making statements like this DOES follow OT laws and would never dream of wearing fabric that had not been tested for wool/linen combinations or eating food that had not been certified as being shellfish-free?

[This is not a hypothetical question. The shatness fabric testing center and kosher food market are both just down the street from me, and the last speech like this (minus the Jesus part) that I heard was from someone who follows these other commandments.]

[debrand]

Burris, have I told you lately that I love you? Well, I love your intelligence and the logical way you rip apart extremists' irrational beliefs.

[Khiwanean]

Man, this guy is a piece of work. Title of the other articles Matt Barber has written on Charisma News:

Bloody Hands: The Southern Poverty Law Center

Will the Boy Scouts of America Commit Gay-Activist-Assisted Suicide?

A Politically Incorrect Guide to 'Sexual Orientation'

A Prayer for Sandy Hook and Visions of Children at Jesus' Feet

An Open Letter to Post-Abortive Women

Can Israeli Jews Coexist With Muslims?

In Wake of Obama's Failures, Netanyahu Has Become Leader of Free World

Has the United States Invited God's Wrath?

IRS Surrenders: Time For Churches to Get 'Political'

Obama's HHS 'Grooming' Children for Sex

An Open Letter to Obama Voters

Why This Is the Most Important Election in History

Supreme Court Shocks Life Into Obamacare Challenge

Equal Rights for Unborn Feminists!

Rush Limbaugh Controversy Uncovers Leftist Agenda

Obama’s Anti-Religious Implosion

Why God-Haters Hate Tim Tebow's Gospel

From skimming some of his other articles, I've concluded Matt is an radically right-wing, anti-gay, Zionist with a persecution complex.

[BoomerLynn]

Dear Asshole Matt Barber,

-Love is unconditional. One does not tell someone they love (especially their child!) that he is going to burn for an eternity in hell if he chooses to act on his attraction to someone of the same gender. Therefore, you do not truly love your son. If one of my children comes to me as a teen and says they are gay, my response would simply be "Ok. I love you just as you are." I would then defend them from people like you at every opportunity, even if that resulted in jail time or even my death. That is the love a parent should feel for their child.

- Do not presume to put words into Jesus' mouth. You do not speak for God, and I doubt he would appreciate your attempts at doing so.

-You say God's truths never change. Have you actually read the Bible? It contradicts itself several times. Since you are so adamant to follow the "law," I assume if your daughter is raped and doesn't scream loud enough you will stone her?

-While we're on the subject of reading the Bible, been checking on that beam in your own eye lately? I doubt it.

-Please stop comparing homosexuality to incest, bestiality, etc. Animals cannot consent to sex with humans. Incest over time can result in birth defects.

-Homosexuality is not unnatural. Humans are not the only species to practice it. Biology, learn it please.

-Stop worrying so much about sexual immorality. What other people do in their bedrooms is not your business. As a Christian myself, I concern myself with being kind to others, charity when I can manage it, and generally loving my neighbor. You know, things Jesus actually said to do.

-Lastly, kindly get over yourself. You are not God's special snowflake. Learn the meaning of real love, and show it to others. Leave the judging to God.

Sincerely,

Someone who is sick of this bullshit

P.S. I may be wrong, but that suit you have on in that photo is probably a cheap cotton/poly blend. Mixed fabrics are an abomination. Please report to the city gates to be stoned. (Making a point, don't really think anyone should be stoned :) )

[GiggleOfGirls]

So, how to do respond when the person making statements like this DOES follow OT laws and would never dream of wearing fabric that had not been tested for wool/linen combinations or eating food that had not been certified as being shellfish-free?

[This is not a hypothetical question. The shatness fabric testing center and kosher food market are both just down the street from me, and the last speech like this (minus the Jesus part) that I heard was from someone who follows these other commandments.]

Then they should be speaking out against people who eat pork and shellfish, just as vehemently as they are speaking out against homosexual sex. From what I understand, the same word for abomination is used to describe both acts. Just because they themselves avoid eating shellfish and pork and homesexual sex doesn't mean that they should overlook some of those acts while decrying others :naughty:

If they ARE speaking out against all of those things equally then they're at least being consistent and I guess it's their right to be a judgmental asshole if they so choose.

[2xx1xy1JD]

Then they should be speaking out against people who eat pork and shellfish, just as vehemently as they are speaking out against homosexual sex. From what I understand, the same word for abomination is used to describe both acts. Just because they themselves avoid eating shellfish and pork and homesexual sex doesn't mean that they should overlook some of those acts while decrying others :naughty:

If they ARE speaking out against all of those things equally then they're at least being consistent and I guess it's their right to be a judgmental asshole if they so choose.

I totally agree that according to the Bible, male homosexual sex isn't any different from eating bacon-wrapped shrimp.

Where I run up against the limits of this argument, though, is with people I know who equate the two - and condemn both behaviors. They will say that people may face temptations for all sorts of things - from eating shrimp to having gay sex. They will say that they love all Jews, regardless of what they eat or who they have sex with, but that doesn't mean agreeing that all behaviors are permitted. They say that it would be outrageous for a rabbi to support a Pork Pride Parade, so they say that there shouldn't be support for a Gay Pride Parade.

Yes, I'll give credit for ideological consistency. If gay sex is treated like one of a laundry list of prohibitions, most of which don't come across as heinous or immoral, does that make it okay to be judgmental?

If not, how to you respond to the argument? Assume for a moment that the person making the argument isn't intentionally trying to come across as an asshole and alienate a good chunk of his audience.

[formergothardite]

Would the person vote to make all shrimp eating/pork eating illegal? Would they ban all mixed fabrics? If they wouldn't do that, but would vote to make gay marriage illegal, then they aren't being consistent. Now, if they are of the live and let live mindset where they aren't gay but are not going to try to stop gay marriage or anything like that, well, there really isn't anything to say to them, IMO. If they want to believe being gay is a sin because of an old book, it will be hard to use any sort of logic with that. You could point out how this belief hurts people who are born gay, but that is about it.

[merrily]

What a load of passive aggressive bull. This guy reminds me of the comic where the angry preacher meets God standing in front of heaven and demands why there's a rainbow and gay people on the other side. And God tells him "what makes you think you're going in?"

[quincygal]

We seem to have a very high ratio of gay to straight men in my family & the chances of DS being gay are fairly good. This Christian parent tells her (20 month-old) son that it's more important to worry about what's in someone's heart than their pants. And I try to use gender-neutral language ("your spouse" rather than "your wife"). I want him to feel accepted if he turns out to be gay or bi or whatever from the start.

Slightly off the subject, one of my closest friends is marrying his BF this fall. My state is trying to pass gay marriage. Please keep your fingers crossed that the guys' wedding can be legally binding, rather than driving to IA for a "real" license.

[MarthaMarcyMayMarlen]

That made me shake, I'm so angry.

To me, heterosexual sex doesn't make sense. But I don't ever tell people they're wrong. Something written thousands of years ago said it was bad. It's in the old testament. Do you avoid mixing fabrics? Do you abhor shellfish? Probably not, so why the fuck do you focus on that one thing?

I can't even string together a coherent thought right now.

It is mentioned in the new testament as well.

[formergothardite]

It is mentioned in the new testament as well.

In the same passage as gossiping and not believing in God. Don't see people making laws against those things....

[GiggleOfGirls]

Would the person vote to make all shrimp eating/pork eating illegal? Would they ban all mixed fabrics? If they wouldn't do that, but would vote to make gay marriage illegal, then they aren't being consistent. Now, if they are of the live and let live mindset where they aren't gay but are not going to try to stop gay marriage or anything like that, well, there really isn't anything to say to them, IMO. If they want to believe being gay is a sin because of an old book, it will be hard to use any sort of logic with that. You could point out how this belief hurts people who are born gay, but that is about it.

Yes, this.

I don't really see the need to try and confront them about their beliefs if they aren't working to ban anything. Deeply held ideological or religious beliefs are difficult, if not impossible, to counter rationally. Pointing out that gay people are people and, under the equal rights amendment, they deserve equal rights under our SECULAR government's laws is probably as good of a response as you can give in addition to pointing out how it hurts gay people.

I definitely take issue with people (consistently or not) pushing their beliefs onto other people, but if someone is bound and determined to hold an offensive, irrational, and/or asshole-ish belief then there's not much anyone else can do to stop them, unfortunately.