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Teen sues parents over forced abortion


rene76

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Posted

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/02/1 ... 79996.html

I first saw this on my FB page. The person who posted the link is very conservative politically. He was upset the courts were trying to take away parental rights. I think that at a certain age a teenager should have a say so in her medical care. I don't know exactly what age that would be but 16 is certainly old enough to know if she wants an abortion. I don't think I could force my 14 year old son to have a medical procedure he didn't want.

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Posted

That's a really interesting story! Though obviously awful for the young girl in question.

I've always wondered how all these religious types blathering about "If my daughter can't get her ears pierced without my permission why don't I get to keep her from having an abortion?" would react when the shoe was on the other foot. Because honestly I have to imagine a lot of teen girls get encouraged towards abortion by their parents... parents know *exactly* how difficult and expensive raising a child is and don't have as much emotional investment in the pregnancy.

Posted

Its wrong for a parent to make decisions about their teenager's uterus. If she gets pregnant, it should be her decision on whether she wants to abort, put it up for adoption or keep it.

Posted
Its wrong for a parent to make decisions about their teenager's uterus. If she gets pregnant, it should be her decision on whether she wants to abort, put it up for adoption or keep it.

Yup. It's one thing for parents to say, "If you want to keep it, fine, but you are incurring all costs for raising the child." It's entirely another to make the decision about whether or not she is allowed to carry to term at all.

Posted

I sure hope for the both the mother and the wanted baby that she gets counseling and a support group, preferably not pro choicers! The worst fate would be for her to become the next anti abortion zealot.

Posted

Really interesting as it is being discussed on another thread.

Posted
That's a really interesting story! Though obviously awful for the young girl in question.

I've always wondered how all these religious types blathering about "If my daughter can't get her ears pierced without my permission why don't I get to keep her from having an abortion?" would react when the shoe was on the other foot. Because honestly I have to imagine a lot of teen girls get encouraged towards abortion by their parents... parents know *exactly* how difficult and expensive raising a child is and don't have as much emotional investment in the pregnancy.

I think their argument is more that for many (not all) women, having an abortion can be traumatic emotionally and it's not that they oppose their daughters choosing it, it's that they want to be able to support them through it. At least that's my view anyway. Being forced to abort/parent/choose adoption really bothers me, I felt that a couple of the girls on 16 & Pregnant (Lori, but especially Ashley) were really guilted and coerced into giving their babies up for adoption when they didn't really want to.

Posted
Its wrong for a parent to make decisions about their teenager's uterus. If she gets pregnant, it should be her decision on whether she wants to abort, put it up for adoption or keep it.

I agree, but I think there's some information that hasn't yet become public.

Posted

Aah.... so this hasn't happened yet. She filed an injunction to keep them away from her

her father said "the decision was his, end of story." Click2Houston adds that the girl's mother "invited the paternal grandparents to a bar for further discussion, where she suggested that she might slip her an abortion pill.

I suppose I can understand (to a sane extent) parents not wanting this for their kid, but shit... forcing an abortion on someone? I hope she gets emancipated and never has to see them again.

I'm also trying to figure out how they could have forced her without an abortion pill... You're not going to find a doctor holding someone down to perform an abortion if they say no (at least not an ethical doc)

Posted
Its wrong for a parent to make decisions about their teenager's uterus. If she gets pregnant, it should be her decision on whether she wants to abort, put it up for adoption or keep it.

QFT

Forcing your daughter to get an abortion is not pro-choice. It's just as bad as forcing her to continue the pregnancy.

Posted
Aah.... so this hasn't happened yet. She filed an injunction to keep them away from her

her father said "the decision was his, end of story." Click2Houston adds that the girl's mother "invited the paternal grandparents to a bar for further discussion, where she suggested that she might slip her an abortion pill.

I suppose I can understand (to a sane extent) parents not wanting this for their kid, but shit... forcing an abortion on someone? I hope she gets emancipated and never has to see them again.

I'm also trying to figure out how they could have forced her without an abortion pill... You're not going to find a doctor holding someone down to perform an abortion if they say no (at least not an ethical doc)

The first article I read said REK has lived with her grandparents for seven months, but didn't mention if her parents retain custody. And considering that her legal representatives are rabid anti-choicers, I really think there's more information than we know.

Posted

QFT

Forcing your daughter to get an abortion is not pro-choice. It's just as bad as forcing her to continue the pregnancy.

Exactly. Pro-choice means that you support the girl having a CHOICE.

In terms of consent to treatment, it is also the same issue. Generally speaking, for medical procedures, someone either has the capacity to consent to treatment, or they don't. So yes, if you argue that teens don't have the capacity to consent to abortion and have medical privacy, you are also arguing that their parents have the sole right to make medical decisions for them - including a possible decision to abort. [There are, BTW, situations where this could be justified. For example, cases involving a girl with limited mental capacity or a girl who was extremely young.]

Posted

QFT

Forcing your daughter to get an abortion is not pro-choice. It's just as bad as forcing her to continue the pregnancy.

This is absolutely not pro-choice. Just as most fundies are not pro-life. They all are pro-control over everyone else.

Posted

Exactly. Pro-choice means that you support the girl having a CHOICE.

In terms of consent to treatment, it is also the same issue. Generally speaking, for medical procedures, someone either has the capacity to consent to treatment, or they don't. So yes, if you argue that teens don't have the capacity to consent to abortion and have medical privacy, you are also arguing that their parents have the sole right to make medical decisions for them - including a possible decision to abort. [There are, BTW, situations where this could be justified. For example, cases involving a girl with limited mental capacity or a girl who was extremely young.]

QFT. To me, this isn't one of those cases where someone has a limited mental capacity, so part of being pro choice means that this girl has the choice about her body and whether or not to continue a pregnancy.

Posted

I hope this girl is safe - physically safe - and that she's able to make a life for herself and her child away from her family. If they're disinhibited enough to try to slip her medication without her consent, she has reason to be legitimately concerned that they would make another attempt to to hurt her or do something to the baby after its born. :(

Posted

As much as I'm sure this poor girl has no idea how hard being a teen mom is, or how hard it is to give up a baby after you've carried it for nine months it's still her body, her baby, her choice and what her parents are trying to do is all kinds of messed up. I'm especially appalled at the mother for even suggesting that she slip her something to make her miscarry that's just cruel and underhanded and such a huge betrayal of trust that I can't imagine how hurt her daughter must feel knowing her mom could put her through something so painful and traumatic. I get the parents wanting to protect their daughter from what is undoubtedly going to be a hard road ahead, but what they're doing is so not the way to go about it. They're going to be lucky to have any sort of relationship with her after this is over if they keep trying to force her to do something she is so obviously against.

Posted
As much as I'm sure this poor girl has no idea how hard being a teen mom is, or how hard it is to give up a baby after you've carried it for nine months it's still her body, her baby, her choice and what her parents are trying to do is all kinds of messed up. I'm especially appalled at the mother for even suggesting that she slip her something to make her miscarry that's just cruel and underhanded and such a huge betrayal of trust that I can't imagine how hurt her daughter must feel knowing her mom could put her through something so painful and traumatic. I get the parents wanting to protect their daughter from what is undoubtedly going to be a hard road ahead, but what they're doing is so not the way to go about it. They're going to be lucky to have any sort of relationship with her after this is over if they keep trying to force her to do something she is so obviously against.

I'm got going to automatically assume that these particular parents want to protect their daughter, esp. since there are allegations of prior abuse. It's just as likely that they want to protect themselves from supporting another child, or having a daughter who is struggling financially.

Posted

Nor can the parents "slip her a pill" to cause an abortion. It's called the "morning after" pill for a reason.

Posted
Nor can the parents "slip her a pill" to cause an abortion. It's called the "morning after" pill for a reason.

There is an abortion pill but I think it requires two separate doses. Not sure how they'd slip her the second dose, logistically speaking.

And how would they slip it to her exactly? Dissolved it in a drink? Force it down her throat? Cook it in a spoon and inject it? :?

Posted

I'll admit, if I have a teen daughter that gets pregnant I will be strongly encouraging her to choose abortion. However, even as passionately as I feel about it, slipping your unwilling daughter an abortion pill to end her pregnancy is just beyond horrific.

Posted

Valsa, I'm curious, why would you strongly encourage her to choose abortion , and why do you feel so strongly about it ?

I know we have clashed on abortion threads in the past, and I'm not trying to start WWIII, but I am wondering why you would advocate one option over another ?

Posted
Valsa, I'm curious, why would you strongly encourage her to choose abortion , and why do you feel so strongly about it ?

I know we have clashed on abortion threads in the past, and I'm not trying to start WWIII, but I am wondering why you would advocate one option over another ?

Because I wouldn't want my teenager to ruin their life. To me, it's no different than if my child were choosing between going to college and, say, dropping out of high school to become a rodeo clown. One is clearly the better option when it comes to pursuing a more secure future, so that's the one I'm going to advocate for.

Posted
Valsa, I'm curious, why would you strongly encourage her to choose abortion , and why do you feel so strongly about it ?

I know we have clashed on abortion threads in the past, and I'm not trying to start WWIII, but I am wondering why you would advocate one option over another ?

I'm not Valsa, but I would also strongly encourage my daughter to abort if she became pregnant as a teen.

As to why..... For the same reasons that most people hope their teenage daughters don't get pregnant. Because I want her to have every chance to experience her youth and continue her education. Because I want her to have children when she chooses to and when she's in a stable relationship, not cause she had a lapse in judgement as a teenager. Because I want my future grandchild to have the sort or advantages that teenage parents usually have difficulty providing. Because i hope that when she chooses to have children she will have a partner to coparent, and the vast majority of teenage mothers end up being single mums.Because I want my daughter's experience of motherhood to be as positive as possible. All the countless reasons why society in general agrees that teen parenting is not the best option.

I would never force my teenager to abort, but when she becomes sexually active I will be taking her to get a contraceptive implant. If that failed, I would make it clear that while the decision was hers and she had my support, I would think that abortion would be the sensible options. I'd tell her my reasons and share the fact that I had chosen to have an abortion when I was 21 and didn't feel ready to parent, and that I still feel that was the right decision. That she probably wouldn't be here if I hadn't made that choice.

I personally find it difficult to understand why a pro choice woman wouldn't feel that abortion was the best option for a teenage daughter and express that view to her.

Like I said, I'd never force - if someone chooses to be sexually active then they can and will choose how to deal with the consequences of sexual activity. But I would certainly let her know my opinion.

Posted
I personally find it difficult to understand why a pro choice woman wouldn't feel that abortion was the best option for a teenage daughter and express that view to her.

This.

Posted

Interesting. From personal experience I have found that parent's opinions weigh VERY heavily on most young people in this situation, and advocating very strongly for any option can lead to the teen making a choice that maybe they will regret in the long run. I think for a young teen, "advocating" often feels the same as "pressuring" - whether the parent intends it that way or not.

I think providing information and resources, and telling them you will support them through this, regardless of their decision is probably better in the long run. Of course I would share my own opinion and experiences, but I think being too passionate on the subject ( in any direction ) can end up with the teen making a decision they might regret, or cause on-going friction or resentment with their parent if they feel they caved in to what they wanted, or if they go against their wishes.

But I also don't think teen mom necessarily equals a bad life. Or that waiting until the appropriate age/life stage equals a good life. Obviously there are some more challenges for a teen mom, but there are more challenges if you are disabled, or have advanced maternal age, or are a single parent or any number of other factors - that doesn't mean the individual will personally give their child a lousy life, or that they will be miserable.

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