Why the Bates Kids Haven't Shown Signs of Rebellion

[musikat]

Until I got to page 3 I was all set to like the Bates more than the Duggars and happily agree that "less rebellion" comes from the Bates being more open and giving the kids more freedom. Then I read all this nonsense about Gil borrowing money from Lawson and now I'm right back to :angry-banghead:

I will say that the Bates kids do seem to have more freedom in their relationships, especially with the courtship rules changing, have more freedom in music (they listen to bluegrass instead of straight up classical music), have had more chances to pursue their talents (Erin is AMAZING at the piano!) and haven't been forced to spend the past 10 years on television, many of those with a regular tv show. The Bates have only had one season of their show (with only 10 episodes I believe) and just appear with the Duggars now and again so the kids aren't so forced to play perfect for the viewers. I feel like the Bates probably have genuine family relationships, instead of the fake relationships the Duggars have.

[PegBundyOfFundies]

I have a really hard time liking the Duggars more than the Bates, but I do for one reason: the confederate heros picture.

JB and M might be lazy and neglectful, but they never had open reverence for an unabashed racist like Nathan Bedford Forrest. His sole reason for joining the confederate army was to keep slaves, and he was a founding member of the KKK (if not the first grand dragon). To have a picture of him in your home, after being college educated, in the 2010s? I cant trust that what you are teaching your kids is good and right and holy. A parent that is truly raising children with a heart of love for God when not revere someone with open contempt for his more "melanated" children.

I don't know how Kelly Bates' black sisters can even stand to be around them; it would hurt and disturb me to my core that my sister entertained such thoughts.

[VapingindaCity]

How did the Bates change their position on Courting after the Zach Failed courtship?

And which pregnancy or episode are u referring (Josiah) Michelle has been preggers a lot on Camera!!!

I think that the married Bates kids are really Making their own Fundie Choices, even tho it miggt be a small thing like getting their ears pierced or Zach saying he will allow his kid Watch Winnie the Pooh are small changes. Heck the fact that they admitted in TV that they GASP! Kissed b4 marriage. .

the Duggar kids are coached and always give Canned Answers to pretty much everything!!!

to me the Bates always seems kinda happy, the Duggars always seems kinda Sad even when they are happy!

[JinderellyJinderelly]

I binge watched the first season of Bringing Up Bates on UP today, and a few episodes of United Bates on youtube today and as much as I want to hate them I cant. My comparisons are based solely on what is shown on TV because I know their Gothardism/ATI roots run deep but comparing the Bates on TV and Social Media to the Duggars on TV and social media to the Bates' are INFINITELY more likeable.

Gil and Kelly seem to dote on their children and each other as indiviiduals, rather than an idea or a statement. The emotion that they show is very endearing and seems genuine.

They don't seem OVERLY political/down your throat with their beliefs.. i.e. Erin's posts about excitement over her pregnancy were actually just a young mom being excited, not an in your face pro-life rant a la Anna.

While the kids are expected to contribute and all of that the parents still seem to be pitching in as well and doing their part.. much UNLIKE the Dugs.

While "rebellion" is def not evident in either camp.. I think the adult Bates do have a bit more freedom of interpretation with their lifestyles.. (Alyssa wearing pants, moving away, stating she wants a big family but never actually mentioning "God's plan" comes to mind, however I don't necessarily think that isn't with some input from her in laws and a political posture to seem more approachable, either way though, she seems happy with the decision)

I could go on, but I shouldn't have started this post while I was so tired. I guess maybe my opinions are swayed because even though im NOT a fundy, or even Christian/religious for that matter, I AM young with a "large" family and intend for it to get larger, LOL, but of course nothing to Duggar/Bates standards, and an earlier post did mention that if Gil and Kelly weren't using contraception before they went full-fundy they must have always had extreme tendencies, and I guess I don't necessarily see that as extreme.

[clueliss]

The difference between the two - pubically at least - is that Gil & Kelly seem to accept that all of their brood is not going to follow the penultimate fundie path. The seem to accept 'mistakes' (in quotes because I'm referring to Zach & Whit's confessioin that they kissed before the wedding). And different lifestyles once they leave the home (Alyssa).

They've also admitted on camera (heck the kids said it on camera which surprised me after years of Duggars hauling the family line) that the older kids were raised stricter than the youngers and when asked in a TH GIl & Kelly basically said something like yeah we got tired and lazy, there is a difference.

[HeLaidItOnMyHeart]

I agree, they're probably fundamentally no better than the Duggars; but they're more likable, imo. I think that their perceived 'southern charm' helps them. That and they just seem more genuine and able to make fun of themselves (at least on the UP show).

[Seasoner_Of_Life]

I feel like Alyssa has rebelled in a way. It is beyond just the physical changes of wearing jeans, tank tops, halter tops, etc. But appears that she has really distanced herself from her family. I know they visit some, but it really seems like she is trying to start her own path away from fundie world. I say that because her social media is filled with pictures of her and what appears to be almost all normal, non-fundie friends. She doesn't run home all time. She doesn't talk about how ever many children god gives her. They honestly seem like a normal couple-young and with a kid-but normal. I just sense more and more distance between her and the bates