Bates Courtship

[Witsec7]

And not a word of the news on the Bates FB fan page. Bayley must be slipping up.

[laura oz]

Maybe it's the hick in me, but I kinda like her hair too. As someone pointed out, at least they're touching slightly even if they have to shove their hands deep in their pockets or sit on them:roll: Cute couple; I'll keep my fingers crossed that it's a lovematch.

[snickerz]

I hope she's less fertile than her mother. It would be nice if they could go more fundy-lite, but those Paines seem mighty gung-ho so I doubt it.

[Witsec7]

http://12paines.com/2011/08/09/a-trip-to-peru/

Seems Chad runs in the right crowd, Bill G, David Waller et al.

[guidedbybobafett]

Her hair is so big because its full of secrets.

[snickerz]

I wonder how much time she'll have to do her hair when she has 5 kids under 5...

[marmalade]

Erin looks really pretty with her hair softer and more natural. Didn't Kelly say that they were thinking of ditching courtship for dating with a purpose? Maybe they realized the young couples do actually need to get to know one another in a more informal arrangement. They do seem happy and like they know each other. Maybe this will spur the Duggars to begin launching their twenty-somethings.

I think after the Zach debacle, these two DID "date with a purpose" (there are pics of them together on the swing, etc. that were obviously from last fall). That would NOT be allowed in the Duggar compound unless a formal courtship was announced. Then again, everything they do is scrutinized (by me, hee) to the nth degree, so they have to get it right. The Bateses, with their show canceled, had room to experiment after Zach's proposal, then fizzle to nothing during the course of their run.

Alecto, not too worried about the age difference. My FIL was 9 years older than my MIL, whose lineage has women living to 100 (they obviously didn't know this in the '50's). Her mother actually made her THINK about what it would be like to be a widow (Baba, who lived to just short of 99 RULED!) but she did it anyway. He died in '07 and she's shriveled into a prune at only 80. She suffers from depression (I got her help or she'd be insufferable) and still says she isn't happy, although she still has everyone catering to her, just as always. I had to teach her how to write checks and balance a checkbook, and a lot of the other aspects of bill-paying. SHE WAS WARNED. But it was 1954, she was 21 and getting old on the shelf, especially with a passel of sisters (think Pride and Prejudice without Pride on their side...parents were immigrants) to marry off. Interestingly, two of her sisters had marriages that lasted under a year because the young husband died of bizarre circumstances. Both ended up marrying up like the Bennet sisters.

Generational patriarchal roles of their generation and lower/verging on middle class when they married, but not fundie.

[marmalade]

Her hair is so big because its full of secrets.

Hee. I used that on FB a couple of days ago. Mean Girls rules! :lol:

[doggie]

My paternal grandparents are/were (I have no idea how to talk about people when one is dead and one isn't) 10 years apart and they got married when my grandmother was in her early 20s.

So, while my gut reaction is that it's squicky, when I think about it more, I don't think it's that big a deal.

Like or extremely horny??

[redcurls]

Am I the only one to notice she is 21ish and he is 30ish.

I find that a bit squicky.

Not really. My parents got married when Mom was 23 and Dad was 33. They had only been together for one year, and this summer they'll celebrate their 30th anniversary :) Of course, my parents had lived independently and weren't treated like overgrown children by their own parents.

[phoenissadido]

Going to distract juuust a second and ask: any of you know where erin's jacket in this picture is from? It looks incredibly comfortable and I'm kindasorta coveting it. :?

3.bp.blogspot.com/-wsZh1tujS4Y/UOo09jrNAuI/AAAAAAAAF60/FlufcmV5yWc/s1600/Chad+and+Erin.jpg

EDIT: http:// removed from the link.

[JesusFightClub]

Am I the only one to notice she is 21ish and he is 30ish.

I find that a bit squicky.

Hmm, I am not automatically squicked out by it. That's the same ages my mum and dad were respectively when they got married ;)

They met at a disco, he came up to her and said "I've been watching you, you dance so beautifully I couldn't stop looking. D'you want to dance with me?".

Knowing this to be incorrect (she can't really dance, she reckons), my mum was nevertheless charmed by his gallantry. He bought her a drink at the bar and the rest is history. :lol:

It seems to me quite a nice story...and not really squicky, but I can see in some circumstances like the really forced "courtship" thing, there could be squicking concerns around it.

[dramallama]

Her hair is so big because its full of secrets.

Four for you, Glen Coco! You go, Glen Coco! And none for Gretchen Wieners. Bye!

*ahem*

As much as I hate to see more fundie couples forming and procreating, they do look like they genuinely like each other, and if they've been getting to know each other for more than a year now, that's promising. What's sad is how unusual/notable that is in fundieland.

[Miggy]

Are we going to start a competition on age gaps and/or young marriage? My grandmother was 14 and my grandfather 20 when they married. (She told my grandfather she was 18.) They were happily married for over 60 years until my grandfather died. I think the difference between 14 & 20 of real world people would be bigger than 21 & 30 in fundies.

[lilith]

My thoughts on Kelly announcing the courtship already - the girl won't call it off in this case, cause the family won't let another courtship fail, and it seems much rarer for the man to call things off - once sex is finally in sight after thirty years it would take a lot for him to cancel.

Poor Michaela, having her little sister court first. She must feel like she was deliberately rejected and Erin chosen. She'll probably be available to help with Erin's babies though.

Im looking forward to the wedding, which I'm sure TLC will film, either as a Duggar episode or a Bates special. I hope the do a webcast too though, so we get to see it uncensored. I'm wondering if the wedding will be in the country style Michaela sews and the Bates favour, or the more glamorous modern modest that Erin would probably prefer. And will Gil preside now that he has a church? We can be sure of lots of musical performances from all the mega families. The Duggars are sure to be there, and the Bates are good friends with the Bontragers and the Wissmans too.

I bet we'll see a Duggar girl court this year now too. I think this will increase the pressure on JimBob to let one of the girls go, especially if the Bates get a VSE of their own instead of starring in a Duggar show.

Lastly, the age gap doesn't bother me. I married for the first time at 21, and my husband was 35. I was certainly too young to marry, but the age gap wasn't one of our many problems. As fundie girls have to marry young to start their adult life, I would say that a slightly older man who is more financially secure and more mature than Josh, Fabulous David etc is probably a better deal

[Pretzel]

I don't know if I can actually snark on that... :think: They look so smitten with each other, comfortable, famliliar and quite a bit in love, i.e. they have chemistry and that means Erin's actually one fundie girl less who has to touch/kiss/sleep with someone she doesn't really feel attracted to. I find 21 and 30 a negligible age difference, as long as both parties are happy and in love.

I also found his blog entry to be very humble and honoring his future spouse. At least it lacks the tiresome "my parents, parents, parents" yadayada part but talks about actual FRIENDS here. Besides, the entry is all about her, not him so that gives me a tiny bit of hope that he'll treat her well and respect her.

I can't help but think of Davilla and that Bradrick guy (remember, the one who wanted a "sturdy girl" and knew he'd found her when she passed a fence rolling her skirt in the dirt and who thinks that SHE makes HIM look good... :roll: :doh: ) who are so self-centered that everything and the world revolves around them. With that in mind I'm glad that Chad-guy spends his time swooning over her and confessing his love for the entire world to see.

(I'm SO pro-love , my pro-loveness might be clouding my judgement here...)

[freejugar]

they're a good looking couple! i hope tlc makes a wedding special and puts the duggars to shame

so they've been hanging out since 2011 or what?

[Guest LilaFowler]

I notice in Chad's blog about him and Erin, he never calls her a woman, but a Girl. Ugh.

[freejoytoo]

Sorry, I don't find any of this cute. It's a fundie couple who were pushed together by their parents and probably barely know each other.

[freealljs]

What about Michaela and Zach?

Erin and Chad do make a cute couple and seem genuinely happy together.

I wonder what the Duggars will do now.

[Spider Burps]

Question: how is Erin going to be a OMGley homemaker if she can't even iron her freaking skirts?

[ILoveJellybeans]

They look happy together and less awkward than the average fundie couple.

He looks waaay older than she is though-although I am just a bit older than Erin, and my crush is a lot older than me and if she asked me out I would definetly say yes. As long as they are legal and consenting adults, it doesnt matter what age they are, and it seems they do like eachother.

[mirele]

Her hair is so big because its full of secrets.

The higher the hair, the closer to God.

[xReems]

According to the Paine's website, Chad is 25 years old. If that was updated last year, he was born in 1987. 4 years age difference isn't that bad.

Even though they're a fundie couple, they do seem to like/love each other. Chad has no problem professing his love, whether its on his site or commenting on the Bates page. Do I find it stupid that they're forbidden from holding hands until marriage? Yes but at least they're able stand and sit close to each other without the 6 inch rule. I don't think they'll get to know each other on a more deeper level until marriage, however, since I'm sure they still follow the "always have a chaperone" rule.

[Irishy]

Question: how is Erin going to be a OMGley homemaker if she can't even iron her freaking skirts?

Ha! Yeah I get a princess vibe from Erin. He seems so smitten I bet she'll be spending g lots of time with her pregnant feet up, pouting. At least at first... 5/6 kids later, she'll just fall apart.