Learning to submit

[snarkbillie]

jezebel.com/5970897/author-of-dirty-girls-social-club-freed-from-feminist-beliefs-by-her-sexy-cowboy

Who wants to guess at what really caused the turn around? :?

[Wandering]

Guilt from slut shamers and probably a religious conversion.

[longskirtlotsakids]

Yeah... the wonderful cowboy that turned her off of feminism? They're already divorced.

Good thing she has wacky feminist skills, like earning a living, to fall back on.

[Dysfundamental]

The guy has since dumped her. She's kind of a troubled lady; she's burned a lot of professional bridges and I think she's desperately looking for answers. This was not an answer.

On edit: I don't think they were married?

More edit: Pretty sure they weren't married, but God brought her [link=http://missalisasplace.com/2012/12/01/an-answered-prayer/"]a new boyfriend[/link] so it's all OK.

I feel bad for her son.

[AddieBelle]

She flip flops soooo much. Maybe a little crazy?

[Guest Anonymous]

I remember her from my dark, dark days at AfterEllen (i.e. before I found Free Jinger):

http://www.afterellen.com/2009/2/visibility-matters

[Guest Anonymous]

Is Alisa Valdes someone we've spoken about before? (Google search says 'no').

I'm enjoying this blog post: missalisasplace.com/2012/05/07/better-in-the-old-days/

Apparently, things were 'Better in the Old Days'. There's a picture of Billie Holiday under the heading '3. Decent Popular Music.' In terms of how things were in the 'Old Days', I would have headed the Billie Holiday photo with "Stunningly brilliant singers were asked to use the service elevator".

[Dysfundamental]

Is Alisa Valdes someone we've spoken about before? (Google search says 'no').

I'm enjoying this blog post: missalisasplace.com/2012/05/07/better-in-the-old-days/

Apparently, things were 'Better in the Old Days'. There's a picture of Billie Holiday under the heading '3. Decent Popular Music.' In terms of how things were in the 'Old Days', I would have headed the Billie Holiday photo with "Stunningly brilliant singers were asked to use the service elevator".

As would Ms. Valdes have been, for that matter, being Latina.

[RosyDaisy]

"when men… act like men rather than like emasculated boys, you as a woman will find not only great pleasure in submitting to them but also great growth as a person."

Umm...no, you will be creating a patriarchal asshole.

* When talking to a man, don't digress. "Keep it clear and direct . . . their brain processes language differently than ours do."

* Never expect anything; instead win him over "by giving and giving and giving until it hurt."

* If an alpha male cheats, let him. "I would share him if I had to."

* Spiffy up: "Men want women to look like women, in dresses and skirts."

Sounds like more patriarchal bullshit to me. That won't make her feel better about herself in the long term. She's condemning her life to one of servitude and pleasing her headship.

[ILoveJellybeans]

Seriously????? Hes a man, not a 6 year old or a caveman. Why would anyone want to marry someone who thinks of him as a stupid child. She doesnt need to talk to him clearly and directly to not confuse his poor peanut sized brain.

Winning him over by giving and giving and giving until he gives in and gets her stuff sounds kinda manipulative as well.

The fundie mindset seems to manage to be both sexist against women and men at the same time.

[outrunningzombies]

Sounds like more patriarchal bullshit to me. That won't make her feel better about herself in the long term.

The only thing she'll accomplish is being an unhappy, self righteous doormat. Pleasing everyone except yourself leads to resentment and bitterness, not Jesus.

[Sprocket]

Umm...no, you will be creating a patriarchal asshole.

Sounds like more patriarchal bullshit to me. That won't make her feel better about herself in the long term. She's condemning her life to one of servitude and pleasing her headship.

So basically, just give men a pass at everything. Oh, and keep that smile on your face while he's cheating on you. Fuck that. I'd rather be alone than with an asshole like that.

[jenny_islander]

If alpha male = the type that might cheat, then cheaters = the type that is born to be alpha. So the most desirable patriarchal headship types are just naturally going to say their marriage vows with their fingers crossed and spread their godly patrimony around more than one family, and the properly submissive wife just has to grit her teeth and pretend to like it?

So basically Mister Alpha is destined for a happy life hopping from cunt to cunt. Yes, that's crude, but that's what it boils down to: that's Mister Alpha's reason for being in this mindset, screwing female organs with his male organ, no consequences allowed. Meanwhile the properly submissive female just puts up with the consequences of being screwed, pretending that Mister Alpha is providing everything needed for life and refusing to go elsewhere for help even when it's obvious that she and her (his!) offspring are struggling, because admitting that Mister Alpha keeps letting her down and has no reason to change would disturb the proper order of things. Or something.

For crying out loud, the whole "alpha male" thing is borrowed from studies of canids, and they actually practice monogamy more often than not!

[Dysfundamental]

For crying out loud, the whole "alpha male" thing is borrowed from studies of canids, and they actually practice monogamy more often than not!

Schenkel's work on wolves has been [link=http://lifeasahuman.com/2010/pets/dogs/the-myth-of-alpha-dogs/]long debunked[/link], anyway.

[Claddagh]

* If an alpha male cheats, let him. "I would share him if I had to."

I'd kick his ass to the curb. Be sure to kick well so they cannot bounce back.

[kiwimusume]

Seriously????? Hes a man, not a 6 year old or a caveman. Why would anyone want to marry someone who thinks of him as a stupid child. She doesnt need to talk to him clearly and directly to not confuse his poor peanut sized brain.

Yeah, I honestly don't know how any man could find that piece of "advice" anything but insulting.