TTH: Preventing domestic violence? You hate men

[JesusFightClub]

http://www.thinkinghousewife.com/wp/201 ... -industry/

This gets me ragey. Can I tell you a little story.

There was a young woman. She died in her early twenties. Her boyfriend stabbed her to death.

First of all he smashed her computer because he thought she was talking to men on it. Then he started hitting her for being mouthy, and she thought she deserved it.

Then one day he stabbed her 27 times. Six of those were defensive wounds. She raised her arms to try and get him to stop.

I know this because I sat through the postmortems. Yes, more than one.

He used two knives. I asked people to tell me if she'd had a chance to try and get help. They said to me "Far too fast"

I sat through the murder trial of her killer. I sat in the courtroom looking at him next to witnesses who were struggling to keep it together, as well as his crew joking and laughing.

NOW FUCKING TELL ME ABOUT A DOMESTIC VIOLENCE INDUSTRY.

I have PTSD. From two events. Just let me know.

[JesusFightClub]

I also want to say to TTH...

She died from a fatal wound to the throat.It took a while to work that out as she was so badly hurt. Took two postmortems.

But I'd forgotten! Domestic violence doesn't exist, yeah? It's an industry.

[kunoichi66]

I also want to say to TTH...

She died from a fatal wound to the throat.It took a while to work that out as she was so badly hurt. Took two postmortems.

But I'd forgotten! Domestic violence doesn't exist, yeah? It's an industry.

I am so, so sorry to hear that.

TTH can go to hell.

[ILoveJellybeans]

That is so sad, what a terrible thing to happen.

How disgusting, why would anyone think of domestic violence as anything but awful.

This sort of thing makes me so mad, why would anyone say this is ok. I know a wonderful woman, who survived such awful abuse, she never did anything wrong and didnt deserve it. Shes possibly the sweetest, kindest person I have ever met, she just happened to marry someone who turned out to be violent.

[NjoyingNsanity]

I also want to say to TTH...

She died from a fatal wound to the throat.It took a while to work that out as she was so badly hurt. Took two postmortems.

But I'd forgotten! Domestic violence doesn't exist, yeah? It's an industry.

Your story sounds eerily like what happened to a girl I graduated with only her POS boyfriend found it neccessary to throw her over their apartment's balcony after he had stabbed her multiple times. I just don't get how anyone could think domestic violence is made up my mom suffered through it for twenty years before she left my stepdad among his many acts of cruilty he pushed her out of a moving car and fired five shots into her truck once when she was fleeing from the abuse. He also tried to hold my mother, his sister and niece my son and I hostage once. We got to my car which he was going to shoot at,but being the half crazy ain't going to take your shit kind of bitch that I am, I hit him with my car not hard enough to kill him but hard enough to knock his ass down so we could get away. He had the audacity to to try and press charges the cop who had known my grandfather refused to arrest me and told him I was within my rights to defend myself and others from assualt with a deadly weapon and told him he was damned lucky I didn't flatten his ass.

[contrary]

the DOMESTIC VIOLENCE INDUSTRY?

What the FUCK is that? What a hateful, awful, terrible woman.

I don't even know what this is supposed to mean...dresses? photographers? caterers?

She is terrible.

[meda]

Just a stupid little man who's just pissed off he can't smack the wife around anymore if she doesn't fetch him his pipe and slippers. Dont give Laurence clicks, he must really be going after the MRA demographic now.

[BoomerLynn]

What the fucking fuck?! :shock: JFC I am so sorry about your friend. And as a victim of abuse (ex-fiance, thankfully we never lived together), fuck you TTH. I did nothing to deserve the bruises that asshole left all over me. I did not desrve to be called the horrible things he called me. I did not deserve the mind games. I certainly did not deserve it when he reached for my neck in an attempt to choke me. However he fully deserved the multiple punches to the face he got in response to that attempt. TTH can take her domestic violence industry (really, wtf?) and go burn in the hell she so gleefully thinks the rest of us are going to.

[2xx1xy1JD]

To have a true WTF moment, take a look at page 10 of the SAVE pdf that TTH links to in the post.

This group argues that restraining orders violate the right to marry and right to privacy in the marital relationship, and that considering domestic violence as a factor in custody/access cases violates parental rights.

I'd be in favor of measures to make the system more responsive to all violence, regardless of the gender of victim or perpetrator. Just don't pretend that domestic violence doesn't exist as a problem, or that it doesn't present special challenges and pose threats to not only the couple but also to children exposed to it.

[cindyluvs24]

Are we surprised?

[AllisonWndrland]

This kind of ignorance gets my blood boiling. :evil: I work in the "Domestic Violence Industry" by managing a project that provides free legal assistance to survivors of sexual and domestic violence. I speak to advocates and survivors every single fucking day about the violence, terror, and control they and their children experience. No one deserves violence, regardless of what they said or did. Also, VAWA provides protection to men and women. It's not just applicable to women.

The only reason that we have SA/DV programs is because abusers and perpetrators believe they have a right to abuse, rape, and murder. Protection orders, consideration of DV/SA in custody and divorce actions, and enforcement of orders by LE and courts is paramount to ending violence in this country. I could go on for pages about this, but honestly, this type of ignorance is exhausting. I've often thought TTH was a fucking fool and this confirms it.

[BravaAmica]

JFC I am so so sorry your SIL went through that, that your whole family and yourself went through that.

[JesusFightClub]

She was my sister in law, and floods of tears does not begin to say.

She was a mate and a fellow union rep.

When she was killed I didn't hear straight away. I had my phone on charge and deliberately didn't take it to a conference I was attending. My manager came over and said delicately "I have a bit of sad news for you." I said what? and she said "your mum has asked me to tell you it's not your dad or your brothers or your wee nieces." I held my head in horror. There was a person missing from that.

My mum called the manager's phone and spoke to me. "X has killed SIL. The police removed the kiddies in the middle of the night. We have them."

THE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE INDUSTRY

[darareaksmey]

JFC, that is just awful and I am so, so sorry.

TTH, you are a turd. I guess you wouldn't mind if your husband smacked you hard enough to make you swallow your teeth.

[Emme]

JFC, <3. Hugs to you. Big big big hugs. TTH is a fucking idiot. One of the dumbest i've ever read. She sucks. A lot.

[2xx1xy1JD]

TTH links to a pdf from SAVE. They claim their objections are all about civil rights, except that they aren't. On page 10, for example, they go on about restraining orders somehow violate the right to marry and to have privacy in the marital relationship. Call me nuts, but if someone is calling the police and reporting violence, it is no longer a private relationship issue. They also object to considering domestic violence in custody/access cases. Again, why the hell not? Exposure to domestic violence has a proven negative impact on children. There's no Constitutional right to beat the wife and kids in the privacy of your own home.

I would actually support measures that support gender equality in domestic violence situations - but that doesn't mean eliminating the programs, nor does it mean depriving funding from LBTQ programs.

[Loveday]

JFC, I'm so sorry about your SIL. :cry:

The Domestic Violence Industry. I have no words. :angry-banghead:

[Arete]

It what everyone else said. The abusers can no longer abuse in peace. That irks them. They can fuck right off, because they will never be able to reverse the momentum.

[Black Aliss]

JFC, I am so sorry for you and your family.

Laurence/Laura is pretty much a one-man hate group, isn't he?

[Closed Womb]

JFC, Sorry for your family's loss. I cannot imagine the pain.

Domestic Violence Industry? Of course, all those people getting rich off emergency shelters and such. Thriving, that.

[Kitty]

Calling it a domestic violence industry is bad enough, but also describing it as cult-like? WTF? and this is the "woman" who took offense to a dad showing up to her moms group. That's much more cult like in my book. Pot, meet kettle.

You wanna know what industry is cult-like? The wifely submission industry, which is all the.ministries preaching that women should always submit to their husbands, denying the reality of abuse, telling women to keep sweet, that they are meant to be wives and mothers and can't possibly be good at anything else.

[jenny_islander]

My church totally supports the domestic violence industry. We collect all the cans of soup and bars of soap and baby clothes and pillowcases and kitchen knives and Tupperware that those lazy selfish women lazily and selfishly demand after having left everything behind in order to save themselves and their children from violent criminals. The shelter is such a plush cushy place too, what with the industrial carpet and lingering smell of Pine-Sol. Money hand over fist, I tell you. Why else would they be pleading for some fresh vegetables and meat? It can't be because their clients are skirting the edges of vitamin deficiency and are either working crap jobs or struggling to survive on welfare.

[JesusFightClub]

jenny_islander, your church sounds amazing! I love that there's a proper reachout.

Small and Smaller were passed through a window by female coppers in hazmat who secured the crime scene. They were screaming, terrified. The reason they were passed through a window is so they didn't see their mum's dead body. She died in a place I've often been to.

THE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE INDUSTRY

That evil secret industry. It gave Small, her dad, my parents and me PTSD. I had my mum collapse sobbing at seeing SIL's grave. I sat through a murder trial patting the shoulder of my distraught brother. We both tried to stay brave but when we got out we were followed by journalists and we were starey-eyed. My mum took us to a restaurant to eat (she couldn't come to the trial) and we tried to eat and we were all shocked and didn't.

The Lousewife is an idiot. If you fucking know, you FUCKING KNOW. About what happens.

That's the result of domestic violence. It's not a woman being slightly unpleasant about men. It's a lovely dead girl who should be alive and awake today. A girl who disgustingly was stabbed 27 times. Two tiny children who sobbed their hearts out at "No Mummy any more?" and were removed via a window so they didn't see the blood.

I can't tell the story too many times.