Whiner lady says bring it on FJ lol

[OkToBeTakei]

Friday, November 2, 2012

Backlash

My oldest daughter just came into the room to tell me that she received a comment on her photography website stating that she will "burn in hell" for her beliefs.

My daughter has nothing to do with this.

The recent post that I shared about "Frankenstorm" seemed to open up a can of worms. That was NOT my intention. In fact, I am beginning to regret ever posting the article in the first place. Not because I don't agree with it, but because I see it in a completely different way than some readers seem to understand. It was too deep for this blog, especially with no explanation, and I am sorry if I offended some of you. I plan to post my beliefs on the subject soon, but I want to first address something that has come up as a result of that post.

I received an email after that initial post, alerting me to the fact that there is a "snark" group out there on the web that has an entire thread devoted just to my blog. While I suppose I should feel flattered to be the subject of another site, the fact is that these women have nothing better to do than spew hatred as they accuse me of things and rip apart my blog. My children have been dragged into it....one woman even went so far as to say that Matthew will likely become a serial killer. They question my sanity and even threaten me with bodily harm.

My first thought was to fight. Of course, nothing I say will ever be enough. The initial reason for their interest in me came from a post that I wrote shortly after moving to Georgia. I was in a bad place, and my view of the world was incredibly skewed at the time, and I admitted as much in a more recent post. But I doubt the second post ever made their thread. It wouldn't fit in with their view of me.

After being alerted to the fact that this site existed, I went and checked it out. There I found exactly what I expected....snark. And honestly, that's fine. I noticed that I am in good company, joining the ranks of The Duggar Family and even Mike Huckabee! While most of what was written amused me, I have to say that I found it very disturbing to see just how far some of these women take their criticism. Without even knowing me, they have me completely figured out and know exactly what my motivations are and why I do what I do. Wow! I was especially surprised to see the criticism I received for taking my children to the doctor and staying with them during their exams.....say what?!

It wasn't long after I was made aware of the site that I began to receive hate mail. Now, let me just say that when I get out of bed in the morning, I put on my big girl panties ;) There's not much you can say to upset a mother of eight! We're pretty tough, and I've had bouts of mastitis that are tougher than what these ladies (and I use that term loosely!) are throwing at me :)

That said, I don't appreciate receiving an email spewing hatred and threats while I'm sitting at the table with my 10-year old son trying to teach him about fractions! And yes, I do keep my phone with me when we're working because I often receive email from our online school. I just have to be sure to set the record straight for those who seek to write my own motivations for me :) And I do fully expect for this entire post to be copy-pasted onto said snark-site so that they can hammer me just a bit more.....enjoy ladies!

Anyway, the email is becoming tiresome and I simply don't have time for it. I am a homeschooling mom of 8, and my life does not revolve around my blog or what anyone thinks of it. I replied to several of the emails, asking them why on earth they choose to read my blog if they don't agree with it. One of the answers was because it's public and I CAN. Wow.....she told me.

And that, dear friends, is why I realize there is nothing I can say or do to make these comments stop. This is a bully mentality....because I CAN.....and there is no winning here. I suppose they would win if they were to silence me, but that's not going to happen. As I stated before, I am not afraid of them, I owe them nothing, and they can choose not to read my blog if they disagree. I WILL delete comments that are rude or threatening. I HAVE that right. Just like I have a right to my beliefs and my religion.

I WILL NOT be making my blog private. I am not afraid to stand up for what I believe in, and I won't be silenced.

BRING IT ON.

I am glad to see my predictions in the other thread were pretty much on the money.

I suspect she has embellished her story to make it sound *gasp* more dramatic.

I would like to see ALL these terrible e-mails she is receiving :lol:

Experiencedd got a special mention, my my serial killer, guess she has little sense of irony. Of course to suit her purposes ie. For everybody to come out and tell her how amazing she is, and how evil everybody who dares to differ in their opinion is.

She does a good spin.

[Sinister Rouge]

Ooooh, how dare someone email her while she is teaching her son math. Now that really is taking it too far.

[Witsec7]

Come on down, it's Fundy Friday we'd love to have you join us for some whine and interfaith dialog.

I do think you are lying though your teeth about getting emails from FJians. When that happens we generally spooge the emails and copy them for the pleasure of our membership at this location. So I'm calling you a lying liar who lies. But yea, you're in 'good' company.

[Lostie]

Come on down, it's Fundy Friday we'd love to have you join us for some whine and interfaith dialog.

I do think you are lying though your teeth about getting emails from FJians. When that happens we generally spooge the emails and copy them for the pleasure of our membership at this location. So I'm calling you a lying liar who lies. But yea, you're in 'good' company.

Oh it totally is Fundie Friday!

I always miss those in the moment sadly, and tonight would be no different as I'm going out a-campaining for a local by-elecetion.

Also, did someone really critique her for taking her kids to the doctor and staying with them... somehow I doubt it. Unless the doctor was a quack or the 'kids' are actually adults.

[Arete]

I do so love a Fundy Friday, especially when I am trapped at home. Off to make some grilled cheese and break out a can of tomato soup. FF at home calls for comfort food. :lol:

[doggie]

she could be getting hate emails. they tend to be popular anymore but who knows where they are coming from? could be someone here who knows?

[alysee]

I haven't been witness to a Fundie Friday either! I'm going to get comfy and wait for the crazy to come in!

[Kitty]

Ive seen the thread and I do not recall anyone wishing her bodily harm. I second that she is a lying liar who lies.

[OkToBeTakei]

Oh it totally is Fundie Friday!

I always miss those in the moment sadly, and tonight would be no different as I'm going out a-campaining for a local by-elecetion.

Also, did someone really critique her for taking her kids to the doctor and staying with them... somehow I doubt it. Unless the doctor was a quack or the 'kids' are actually adults.

Hehe she seems to have missed out quite a bit :D

Before the doctor ever even comes in, the nurse asks 5 million questions, mostly generic and pertaining to everything from the state of their bowels to their maternal grandfather's high cholesterol- no big deal, right? Well, yesterday, after asking my children about how their grades are in school and if they get along with their peers, the question that I NEVER expected to hear was asked....

and do you have a special GIRLFRIEND or BOYFRIEND?

(Please be aware that this question was addressed to each child, not simply asking my daughter if she has a boyfriend or my son if he has a girlfriend- which, by the way, I don't see any relevance in either. I mean, what would the next question be if they had said yes..... oh, would you like a condom?!)

Needless to say, I sat there in shock, trying to decide if I should protest the question. After thinking about it for a few seconds, I realized that neither child really seemed to notice as they answered "no" and that by objecting to that question being posed I might actually be drawing more attention to it, leading to me having to explain to my children why on earth someone would ask such a thing.

So, I kept my mouth shut, only to find myself having to bite my tongue as she went on to explain to the kids that some people like people that are the same as them and that is not for the nurse or doctor to judge because it's OK.....

SAY WHAT?!?!

Really, why couldn't she just leave it alone?!

I was mortified.

But, I was still hoping that my kids were thinking more innocently about the whole thing and didn't REALLY "get" what was going on.

I mean, we live in a very conservative area- an area that, up until now, I haven't had to worry about condoms being passed out or, for that matter, even mentioned in school. An area where forms are sent home for permission to show my kids any "controversial" material pertaining to their growth and development (which has been very appropriate and I have had no concerns over).

And we've been in to this same doctor for well visits before, many times, and this question has never been asked. This was, however, the first time we had ever been taken care of by this particular nurse, so, while it may be the policy of the office to ask these questions, I'm guessing that most of the nurses know us well enough to avoid this particular area. They did ask Allie (17) and Emily (16) about drug or alcohol use when they were in the day before, but that was the extent of it- or so I thought.....

You see, when I got home yesterday, the first thing I did was get the 3 girls together to discuss what had happened, and I learned more than I really wanted to know. Sophie, age 14, did tell me that she had been aware of what the nurse was asking- I figured she probably was. But what came as a shock to me was when Allie and Emily chimed in and told me how the nurses had tag-teamed me and I didn't even know it. Apparently, they have a system going where one nurse will take the parent in the room while another nurse takes the kids to get weighed and measured, and it's at that time that they show the kids a list of questions and have them read and then answer out loud with a "yes" or a "no" after reading each question. The questions pertain to sex, drug and alcohol use. They seem to start this procedure when the kids are 13, because they didn't do it with Sophie and Josh, and I have to assume that's because Josh was younger and they were together. They did, however, do it to both Allie and Emily. The next step is to take the kids back in the room and ask them the same questions in front of the parents.

Now, here's where it gets interesting....

Allie is pretty sure that the point of this whole process is to see what the kids say when they are out of mom's sight and then to see if they answer the same when they are in the room with mom. Then, if the child admits to something out in the hall but not in front of mom, they know the child is not being honest with the mom.

SNEAKY

And really, I'm fine with them asking about alcohol and drug use.... I guess.

I suppose there are lots of children out there with parents that don't care or aren't aware, so maybe it's a good thing.

What I object to is the process.

I mean, if they're going to such great lengths to get information from children when I'm sitting right there, what on earth are they doing behind my back?!

As I said before, I didn't used to worry about these things. I thought we were safe from the liberal agenda here....

in my neighborhood.

Hello world- I'm awake now.

And sad.

Sad to know that my 12-year old is being asked questions about and being led to believe that it's OK for him to be a homosexual.

And sad to think that our society says it's OK for doctors and teachers to step in and "educate" my children on matters that belong in the home.

Guess this speaks VOLUMES for those that homeschool. On the other hand, this didn't happen at school..... it happened at the doctor- with me in the room.

SAD.

[Anxious Girl]

Burn the mesquite, experiencedd! Let it burn! :twisted: ... Dammit, why do I always have work when we have the trolls on here? :( Oh, well, I still have my nook...

[meda]

So I have mixed feelings about this. I posted a comment on her blog that was deleted. It was rather pointed, but I did not swear at her or wish her harm. That is my personal boundary for comments to fundies. It does give me pause if someone from here is emailing a child telling them they will burn in hell, or sending this woman threatening email, because I think that is problematic for FJ. I realize that she is probably embellishing for effect, but I noticed that on that silly doctors are evil SAHD blog there was an Instagram troll-ish comment that was weird and threatening. I realize this community is large and diverse andlurkers do what they want, also that people have different boundaries for such things. Just putting a concern out there.

ETA: this is not directed at regular posters, I think we have a creepy lurker/former poster problem.

[OkToBeTakei]

Ive seen the thread and I do not recall anyone wishing her bodily harm. I second that she is a lying liar who lies.

Nope no bodily harm wished upon her. Tchotckes (sp) Did ask her to kiss her ass. Might be it :lol:

[CynicMom]

My favorite line is where she insinuates that we complainers aren't real ladies when she has post after post of complain-bragging about her fancy possessions. Pot, kettle!

Also, please let us know who was emailing hurtful things to a minor. No one here would agree with that.

[Arete]

To be honest, I would not be surprised if she or one of her children got a comment from one of the trolls who like to stir shit in the name of FJ. Certain members of my family call these tactics false flag operations. They are the lowest of the low.

[Lady_M]

For the record, I'm a little surprised she's talking about getting hate mail. I mean, I come here and snark on stuff and think some of her viewpoints are pretty ridiculous, but I'd never actually try to contact her and I don't wish harm to her or her family. Nothing I say is going to change her views, and nothing she says is going to change mine.

[OkToBeTakei]

So I have mixed feelings about this. I posted a comment on her blog that was deleted. It was rather pointed, but I did not swear at her or wish her harm. That is my personal boundary for comments to fundies. It does give me pause if someone from here is emailing a child telling them they will burn in hell, or sending this woman threatening email, because I think that is problematic for FJ. I realize that she is probably embellishing for effect, but I noticed that on that silly doctors are evil SAHD blog there was an Instagram troll-ish comment that was weird and threatening. I realize this community is large and diverse andlurkers do what they want, also that people have different boundaries for such things. Just putting a concern out there.

Yes Meda I would share your concern. I would feel no urge to e-mail anybody I am happy enough to quite publicly post my differing views.

As you say we are not aware of other's boundaries. That said. There is a part of me that does not believe she actually received ALL these e-mails or the daughter (photography site? Bit obscure.) I am inclined to think she is embellishing for effect. So much of the rest of the post seems to be her own spin on the situation rather than based in fact.

I would not though be surprised if she did not receive hate mail over her Frankenstorm post. It was tasteless, mistimed and bound to make many see red, despite their religious beliefs. She did at least say as much herself that her timing was ill-advised.

[Lady_M]

Also, please let us know who was emailing hurtful things to a minor. No one here would agree with that.

Seconded. E-mailing/commenting nasty stuff to kids is not okay.

[Witsec7]

So I have mixed feelings about this. I posted a comment on her blog that was deleted. It was rather pointed, but I did not swear at her or wish her harm. That is my personal boundary for comments to fundies. It does give me pause if someone from here is emailing a child telling them they will burn in hell, or sending this woman threatening email, because I think that is problematic for FJ. I realize that she is probably embellishing for effect, but I noticed that on that silly doctors are evil SAHD blog there was an Instagram troll-ish comment that was weird and threatening. I realize this community is large and diverse andlurkers do what they want, also that people have different boundaries for such things. Just putting a concern out there.

ETA: this is not directed at regular posters, I think we have a creepy lurker/former poster problem.

I totes agree meda. She may also be an overreacting fundy, and views any email/comment that disagrees with her point as threatening.

[Kitty]

To be honest, I would not be surprised if she or one of her children got a comment from one of the trolls who like to stir shit in the name of FJ. Certain members of my family call these tactics false flag operations. They are the lowest of the low.

My guess is that if any of this is true, the shit-stirrer is a lurker. You don't have to be logged in to see anything in this board, so who knows what types of people see our snark and turn it into harassment and threats. And then there's the people online widget thing at the bottom if every page, and some of those people have never posted and I don't recognize their names at all.

[ahnfamily]

This site is far from a board of evil. I know I have seen a lot of caring posts on wishing others well (Jordyn). Posts have been made hoping these women get freedom.

[blisterine]

i wish her no harm, i just hope she owns stock in hobby lobby with all her faaancy decorations.

christopher lowell used to call it "7 layers of design", but i recommend stopping at 5.

[RosyDaisy]

I have lurked here for quite a while, and never have I heard anyone make threatening remarks about or to children. This lady must be getting her info second or third-hand with a lot getting lost in translation. That said, anybody who has a public blog or social network site ought to know that they should lock it down if they want to keep it private. Otherwise, it's fair game for snarking. Besides don't fundies consider being snarked on at FJ as a badge of honor.

[Alecto]

Is this like the inverse of the Secret PM Army? The Secret PERSECUTION Army?

[MamaJunebug]

I'm embarrassed to have to ask: which blogger is this??

[OkToBeTakei]

I'm embarrassed to have to ask: which blogger is this??

Hehe

viewtopic.php?f=8&t=13471