12 year old kidnapped to "elope" and it's her fault?!?

[mpheels]

I don't know if this goes here or in chatter, so please move if needed...

We have a story running in our local news about a convicted sex offender who ran off with a 12 year old with plans to get married. He started a sexual relationship with the child months ago, and had been planning the "escape" for a few weeks. The girl claims she knew about his criminal record, and was consenting for everything (which of course doesn't matter since a 12 year old can't legally consent to sex or marriage). The whole situation is really disturbing, but what has me really upset are the comments on the local news sites. More than one person has commented that the child knew what she was doing, and should share some of the blame. One even goes so far as to say she should spend time in jail as well. Ugh.

Here's the full story, with comments: http://www.wral.com/news/local/story/11600698/

Not breaking the link b/c it is a legit news site.

[Deleted03]

what? Anyway, I thought eloping meant getting married in secret. How the hell did he plan to marry a 12 yo in the US?

This is obviously wrong, and I hope she gets some help.

[Dollypeeps]

A 12 year old child against a grown assed man and she should spend time in jail as well. WTF, really WTF.

I know here UK he'd be in jail and she would be getting some help if not a lot of help as he has groomed her so she would say these things its his get out clause for sure and it wont I hope work.

[FeministShrew]

It's on our local news here in SC. When the Amber Alert was issued, the first comment on the story was, "That girl looks & dresses a lot older than 12!" & I stopped reading. :evil:

I don't read the comments on my local news websites anymore. They make me hate people.

[Sola]

It's on our local news here in SC. When the Amber Alert was issued, the first comment on the story was, "That girl looks & dresses a lot older than 12!" & I stopped reading. :evil:

I don't read the comments on my local news websites anymore. They make me hate people.

Seriously? She's fucking TWELVE! It doesn't matter if she dresses older. She's twelve. End of.

[shesinsane]

Why does this surprise you? It's always the woman's fault. When the woman is only 12, it's always the girl's fault. :roll:

[Swamptribe]

I read another article today about a young lady in tunisial who was raped by three police officers is being brought up on 'indecency' charges.

http://www.aljazeera.com/news/africa/20 ... 34390.html

Do these idiots not realize, that every time they use an excuse such as 'well, she dressed slutty', 'she wasn't modest' that they are telling rapists and abusers everywhere that it's ok for them to rape and abuse, because the victim was 'asking for it'.

I cannot understand the reasoning that someone uses to justify making such a statement. ( I'm happy to say my husband doesn't get this crap either.) Why is it OK to excuse such horrific anti-social behavior? What is the point of making such a statement? To blame the victim, to make excuses for the abuser is to tacitly give them permission to abuse.

[Someonetocall]

*snip* One even goes so far as to say she should spend time in jail as well. *snip*

What the heck for?

I shake my head. :snooty:

[SpeakNow]

Seriously? She's fucking TWELVE! It doesn't matter if she dresses older. She's twelve. End of.

I could understand if it were a missing person sign that said she was 12 but appears older (since such a description might help someone identify the child), but that commenter is way out of line.

[mpheels]

What the heck for?

I shake my head. :snooty:

To "teach her a lesson" of course, because "if you're going to act like an adult, you should be treated like an adult." Which of course, if full of fail. If she had been an adult, then this would be a non-story.

In other news, there is a story on the same site about a guy breaking into the home of a couple of female college students and climbing into bed with them. According to the comments the women ("girls") should just get over it because no one was hurt. Cause you know, it isn't traumatizing at all to wake up to find a complete stranger in your bed, rubbing you leg. Never mind that behaviors like that tends to escalate, and the guy is one step away from raping someone. Just get over it, and remember to lock you doors.

[Kaylee]

The whole situation is messed up. I have a friend that lives in the same trailer park as the girl and her father (and the abductor/probable rapist's mother). The girl's mom commented suicide earlier this year and her birthday is coming up soon. My friend said she's seemed between angry and sad and withdrawn whenever she's seen her around in the past few months. The family is very poor and she was not getting any sort of grief counseling or anything that anyone knew of, which might have made her more vulnerable to this guy and open the do anything to get away or try to change her life. She had been walking up and meeting the man at the Dollar General store a block or two ago and people had seen them together but never really said anything, even though a lot of locals knew the man was a sex offender - he'd gotten another teenager pregnant and she tried to defend him and didn't want to press charges against him. A lot of people online were blaming her father too, but apparently he went to the cops and had the guy arrested when he found out they were texting, then the abductor made bail, had the girl meet him, and took off out of state with her. I don't see blaming her at all. What I see is a predator who already has experience grooming and manipulating young girls who has taken advantage of someone at a very hard time in their life.

[FeministShrew]

There's a whole lot of blame-the-victim attitude here. A serial rapist was arrested this week. He's confessed to several rapes & trying to

kidnap several women in public places (we were terrified for a few days, let me tell you!). Two of his victims were raped at gunpoint after he knocked on the door & asked to use the phone, then forced his way in. People are actually saying that these women wouldn't have been raped if they hadn't opened the door. :evil: I'm sorry, they wouldn't have been raped if he hadn't decided to become a rapist.

[weirdghostboo]

So, let me get this straight.

Twelve-year-old girl gets kidnapped across state-lines by a sex offender.

Sex offender gets caught. And yet the twelve-year-old gets blamed? I'm sorry, but what?

[gezykah]

I've seen that type of reaction way too much, not just in the news but in real life as well. Some people think everything has a "reason" and a way to be prevented but that's simply not true. So when it happens instead of supporting the victim the victim gets blamed so somebody's precious worldview doesn't get destroyed. Then they can sit back and say well if she didn't dress that way...or throw out some other BS excuse then act like it would never happen to them, or anybody who would listen to them, because they know better and God would never let them get punished like that.

[FeministShrew]

So, let me get this straight.

Twelve-year-old girl gets kidnapped across state-lines by a sex offender.

Sex offender gets caught. And yet the twelve-year-old gets blamed? I'm sorry, but what?

Welcome to the holier-than-thou self-righteous Christian south. Welcome to my world.

[Three and Done]

The whole situation is messed up. I have a friend that lives in the same trailer park as the girl and her father (and the abductor/probable rapist's mother). The girl's mom commented suicide earlier this year and her birthday is coming up soon. My friend said she's seemed between angry and sad and withdrawn whenever she's seen her around in the past few months. The family is very poor and she was not getting any sort of grief counseling or anything that anyone knew of, which might have made her more vulnerable to this guy and open the do anything to get away or try to change her life. She had been walking up and meeting the man at the Dollar General store a block or two ago and people had seen them together but never really said anything, even though a lot of locals knew the man was a sex offender - he'd gotten another teenager pregnant and she tried to defend him and didn't want to press charges against him. A lot of people online were blaming her father too, but apparently he went to the cops and had the guy arrested when he found out they were texting, then the abductor made bail, had the girl meet him, and took off out of state with her. I don't see blaming her at all. What I see is a predator who already has experience grooming and manipulating young girls who has taken advantage of someone at a very hard time in their life.

THIS... SO MUCH THIS!

My youngest DD is 12, and as intelligent as she is,as mature as she may act at times, and as "old" as she looks (she's almost 5'6"), she IS TWELVE!!

This pathethic excuse for a "man" is likely feeding into the BS that this CHILD is at fault in some way... A child that has experienced severe trauma, who was likely looking for "love" from any adult that showed any sign that they "cared" for her.

This makes me incredibly sick.

[FeministShrew]

THIS... SO MUCH THIS!

My youngest DD is 12, and as intelligent as she is,as mature as she may act at times, and as "old" as she looks (she's almost 5'6"), she IS TWELVE!!

This pathethic excuse for a "man" is likely feeding into the BS that this CHILD is at fault in some way... A child that has experienced severe trauma, who was likely looking for "love" from any adult that showed any sign that they "cared" for her.

This makes me incredibly sick.

Exactly! I was like your daughter. I hit my current height (5'7") at 11.When I was 12, I looked 18. When I was 13 was "in love" with a 22 year old. I would have gladly run off with him to be his child bride, because, ZOMG I LOVE HIM! and because I was a child & not capable of realizing what was wrong with that.

Thank god he was a real man! He was nice to me but kept me at arm's length. Eventually I got over my infatuation & moved on to boys my own age.

I hope they get this little girl the counseling she needs!

[Lemonbalm]

I literally weep for humanity, you have got to be kidding me?! A 12 year old cannot consent to anything, she cannot even leave school without permission!

[BravaAmica]

So, let me get this straight.

Twelve-year-old girl gets kidnapped across state-lines by a sex offender.

Sex offender gets caught. And yet the twelve-year-old gets blamed? I'm sorry, but what?

So, he took the girl across state lines. That makes it federal, if I recall correctly.