Don't homeschool...you're a quitter on your kids!

[dairyfreelife]

we took ten couples to a homeschool conference. The main speaker was Gregg Harris who made a startling statement. He said to look around at your friends that came with you and notice who they were. He then said that most of those people would be quitters and not persevere in homeschooling until their children were grown. Why? Because we are a generation of quitters!!

No way! Not these dedicated couples. I can remember many of those families who attended with us that year. Out of those families; only two are still homeschooling and three are either divorced or separated. It doesn’t seem to matter what our convictions are, they aren’t strong enough to ‘keep us keeping on when the going gets tough.’ We are a generation of compromisers who change what we believe or think like the wind.

Our commitment to our children should be our first priority. As moms (or dads) our commitment often lags by the middle of the year as the winter blues set in. As January turns to February many moms are hopelessly depressed climbing the walls with children spending more time ‘inside’ than out. We can feel like it is time to quit! What’s a mom to do?!

havenuvrest.blogspot.com/2011/09/generation-of-quitters.html

[emmiedahl]

I quit homeschooling when it was no longer the ideal choice for my children's education due to changes in family circumstances. My commitment to them *is* my first priority and it supercedes my commitment to any particular mode of learning.

[anniebgood]

I homeschooled my oldest (with help from the district) when he was homebound after contracting whooping cough. (It was harder for me to do that, than to teach 9th grade special day students.)

He was 12 and had contracted pertussis after having strep two times and a positive mono titer. We had to work around his naps because he really didn't have the energy. We did however manage to get him through to the 7th grade.

[clibbyjo]

This attitude is alive and well in the secular homeschool world as well. I have many friends who have started cyber schooling or put their kids in school(mostly due to divorce or having to work) and some people have been very judgemental. Its that "Aw, you are not one of US anymore. We are better than you" attitude and it burns me. Since my kids are older now, most of their "homeschool" friends are now in cyber or school. At least in our group the same kids still hang out with us in the summer and go on whatever fieldtrips and stuff they can work around their schedules.

Its the same "I outmother you" mommy war but a different topic.

[AuntCloud]

Its the same "I outmother you" mommy war but a different topic.

Reminds me of an attachment parenting site I used to frequent (admittedly, sometimes I just wanted to gawk at the extreme crazies). Turned out some of the young mothers were deeply ashamed to admit they owned a stroller and did not carry their babies/30 lb toddlers around all day. Yes, they have been outmothered.

[ILoveJellybeans]

One of the reasons I dont want to have a kid is the competitions between parents and how they think their method is the only method and have to out do eachother on who is the best.

"You only breastfed your kid til he was 3? Well I breastfed my kid til he was 10!"

"You dont let your kids eat fast food? I only allow my child to eat organic foods and drink magical unicorn tears"

"You didnt spend a second away from your child til he was five and then showed up at his school every day to breastfeed him through the school gate at age 8? I homeschooled my children and they havent been away from me for a single day and they are 18 and 20"

[Rosa]

My experience with the mommy wars is that they rarely happen in real life, and when they do you can just switch friend groups.

[Coconut Flan]

Yes, the online mommy wars online are worse than the ones in real life. They know that in real life you may catch their van in the McDonald's drive through line or see the kid riding in the cart at Target. Since my kids are way past the attachment parenting stage I get my jollies giggling at the struggles the rabid attachment parenting mommies are now having with their kids.

[dairyfreelife]

Its the same "I outmother you" mommy war but a different topic.

The mommy wars drive me crazy and I don't have any children. If a mother loves her child, and it's obvious they want to do what's best for that child and doesn't physically/emotionally abuse them, they are doing just fine as a mother. I saw this shirt for a baby and if I ever have a child, I'm totally buying it...

ETA: Getting picture to show up

[Glass Cowcatcher]

Disgusting. This isn't mommy wars, this is deliberately shaming parents who recognize that they can't provide what their kids need and have to turn to the professionals.

It's like saying, "Your kid gets a cold? You didn't persevere in keeping them healthy, how dare you take them to the doctor!"

[chaotic life]

It's a totally different technique from convincing people to homeschool 1-2 decades ago. Back then, to convince someone to homeschool, they used to say not to make future plans. Just focus on what is best for THIS year, they said.

Of course, I am a 20 year veteran of homeschooling and that's exactly the approach I have always taken. When it wasn't in my children's best interests to homeschooling, I moved them to an environment where they could continue to thrive.

I have a slew of public school honor roll students that students, teachers, and school personnel feel the need to gush about my children everytime they meet me. Doesn't seem to matter *which* child they are in relation to, they just LOVE my kids. Yet, I have one still in homeschooling, because it is truly the best environment for him.

I was supposed to homeschool three this fall. It turns out, I had serious concerns about my ability to take on educating three children after losing a child this summer. I don't see that as being a quitter. I see that as being a responsible parent and making sure that while I am taking time to grieve AND guide my family in their grieving that I am not neglecting their educational needs as well.

However, in my personal experience, I've seen WAY too many homeschoolers who were NOT really schooling up to grade level. I am putting one in not quite at grade level on his language and writing skills. He's an ESL student and he truly and legitimately need one more year of homeschooling. He's also a HUGE extrovert and I felt getting into school to help him cope with his grief was more important than keeping him home and not letting the school address what is now a very slight delay from his ESL challenges. His brother died in our living room. The child needs to be able to step away from that grief and focus on being a child.

Honestly, I'm so tired of the guilt and shame associated with Christain homeschoolers anymore. These days, if I want to associate with other homeschoolers, I almost always seek out secular homeschoolers.

[E Street Fan]

Not completely related to homeschooling, but this is certainly true of them:

We are a generation of compromisers who change what we believe or think like the wind.

Some fundies change their beliefs whenever something else occurs that scares them. I can absolutely see fundie homeschooling being reduced to a second- or third-grade level if fundie parents think any more might give their children ideas, and no-meet courtships being desirable.

[theologygeek]

One of the reasons I dont want to have a kid is the competitions between parents and how they think their method is the only method and have to out do eachother on who is the best.

"You only breastfed your kid til he was 3? Well I breastfed my kid til he was 10!"

"You dont let your kids eat fast food? I only allow my child to eat organic foods and drink magical unicorn tears"

"You didnt spend a second away from your child til he was five and then showed up at his school every day to breastfeed him through the school gate at age 8? I homeschooled my children and they havent been away from me for a single day and they are 18 and 20"

That is when you say "My kid can beat up your kid" and walk away.