This is what creepy looks like: Covenant Wedding

[SisiL78]

No. No it's not. This "covenant" is about controlling your nearly adult "child". It has absolutely nothing to do with protecting them. As it happens Cheryl and Terry decided to put on a show for their friends so they could see just how much control they have. It's disgusting.

Ah, I should have written that better. I meant that their definition of it seems to be about protection. But, they are actually not protecting those children by exposing all their dirty laundry online. And protecting one's children shouldn't require a document be signed in front of witnesses, I think it should come with the acceptance of job as parent.

[Maggie Mae]

Yes. treasuresfromashoebox.blogspot.com/2012/03/getting-past-dog.html

What a dick. Seriously.

[Lady_M]

Yes. treasuresfromashoebox.blogspot.com/2012/03/getting-past-dog.html

Just read the dog story. The cruelty is absolutely horrifying, not to mention the violation of trust.

[Maggie Mae]

Just read the dog story. The cruelty is absolutely horrifying, not to mention the violation of trust.

I'm horrified. I also read her "My Testimony" link & was particularly concerned about this:

Finally I knew that there was no way that I could continue living this way and that I had to make a choice: either end my life or accept Jesus Christ. There was no other alternative.

Why are "pastors" with no training allowed to give counseling?

I have no words. When I think I've reached the end of the internet, that there couldn't be any more crazys, that it's just statistically likely that any other fundie will be interesting, I read something like that. What a sad story and i, unlike her followers, do not feel particularly uplifted by her story. I feel really sad that she was taken in by religion at such a vulnerable point in her life. If she had been able to afford secular counseling, her daughter probably wouldn't be marrying her father.

[2xx1xy1JD]

Ah, I should have written that better. I meant that their definition of it seems to be about protection. But, they are actually not protecting those children by exposing all their dirty laundry online. And protecting one's children shouldn't require a document be signed in front of witnesses, I think it should come with the acceptance of job as parent.

I agree with the appalling lack of privacy being the opposite of "protection".

I just see any of this as being about genuine protection. OF COURSE caring parents will offer their best advice to their grown and nearly-grown children. Once they are 18, though, it's a one-way street. Parents may give their honest advice, but children are under no obligation to listen. Take the responsibility for a major life choice away from a grown woman does not "protect" her. She would be in a far better position, from a "protection" stand-point, if she had grown up with better role models who could have shown what a genuinely honest, respectful, non-violent and committed relationship looked like.

[Deleted07]

Oh the Q&A from this post is up:

treasuresfromashoebox.blogspot.com

Such question like:

If dating was good enough for you and your husband, why isn't it good enough for your children?

Will Terry choose Haley's husband?

If she is old enough to marry, why does she need her father's permission to marry?

What about your sons? Will they experience this same covenant ceremony?

Oh this is going to be riveting and hypocritical I can tell... ;)

[luckystone]

Eww, as if all the stories weren't bad enough, just read her plea to Maria Shriver to not divorce her husband and to FORGIVE rather than destroying the marriage and blah blah. Gross and misogynistic. No mention of the cheating man who destroyed the marriage. Most of the comments agree. It really reads like "I have to accept a cheating husband, why won't you?"

[notsocommon]

How NOT to discipline a two-year-old for lying:

Translation: The child has no freaking idea what prayer is, and probably is making no connection between her "lie" and the punishment meted out. A child this age is more likely to think she's just in trouble for making Mommy mad for some random reason.

And I believe the "Lord" was thinking, "Millstone, stat."

She tattled on her mother to GOD! lol. That is better than tattling to grandma!

[Koala]

Eww, as if all the stories weren't bad enough, just read her plea to Maria Shriver to not divorce her husband and to FORGIVE rather than destroying the marriage and blah blah. Gross and misogynistic. No mention of the cheating man who destroyed the marriage. Most of the comments agree. It really reads like "I have to accept a cheating husband, why won't you?"

Her letter to Maria Shriver is pathetic.

[notsocommon]

I once argued this point with a fundie and they said that God (who got Mary knocked up) is everyone's father, so he didn't have to go ask her earthly father permission since he was her heavenly father. And Mary totally went and asked permission from her earthly father before leaving the house to visit her relatives (even though it isn't in the Bible) and that she had a male family figure with her while she travelled (even though that is also not in the bible).

Funny how fundies have to twist, pervert, and add to the Bible in order to fit their views. isn't it?

[Koala]

I agree with the appalling lack of privacy being the opposite of "protection".

I just see any of this as being about genuine protection. OF COURSE caring parents will offer their best advice to their grown and nearly-grown children. Once they are 18, though, it's a one-way street. Parents may give their honest advice, but children are under no obligation to listen. Take the responsibility for a major life choice away from a grown woman does not "protect" her. She would be in a far better position, from a "protection" stand-point, if she had grown up with better role models who could have shown what a genuinely honest, respectful, non-violent and committed relationship looked like.

AMEN.

[SisiL78]

I didn't really follow this family before. The dog thing was insane. Maybe they would have ended up putting the dog down anyways, but he treated her like she didn't have a right to an opinion or to even say goodbye to the dog. And the evidence against the dog was flimsy at best.

What is it with most fundies and animal abuse? I guess when you think of yourself as being the highest of life forms because you're a man then pets, and children, and wives are just things to you to treat as you see fit and convenient.

I'm disgusted with the whole "protecting of the heart" by these fundy parents. They are just setting up arranged marriages to control their children. And if they need the free labor at home or just need to keep their victims close at hand they will decide that G-d is not sending a proper suitor to the girl so its G-d's fault they will be spinsters with nothing to their name. And, if their marriage is troubled, its the girl's fault not Daddy's or G-d's fault.

It must take an awful lot of brainwashing and spiritual abuse to convince a young woman to let her father, a man who cheated on his wife, to be responsible for finding the man that she will have to spend the rest of her life with. A 40 year marriage, for example, is 14,600 days. But, these guys consider a few supervised dates and phone calls to be enough to start that marriage with. Despite having to spend the greater part of her life with this man, and little recourse if she realizes he makes her unhappy, the woman cannot initiate contact wtih someone she likes. She cannot date a few guys to see what she likes and doesn't like. She's not allowed to break up a courtship that she didn't initiate lest she ends up labeled as a brat who wouldn't make a good wife.

It just sounds absolutely miserable. Tens of thousands of days where you wake up every day next to someone you don't want to be with and have him make your decisions for you while you birth his children and clean his house and cook his meals and satisfy his sexual needs. What a lovely system.

Its bad enough to end up in a bad marriage and find yourself needing a divorce. Divorce is a struggle for many women in a financial way. But, being alone is better (at least imho) to being with someone who makes you miserable. But, these fundy girls are so brainwashed that they will never seek out divorce. And if they do their families will reject them and offer no support, which leaves them and their children in a situation where they have no money and due to a lack of education the mother is unable to secure a decent job.

I just can't see any good in this situation.