Because being Mormon fixes everything, right? right?

[emmiedahl]

I found this blog while surfing the internet and it is annoying the fuck out of me. Mr. White Privilege ("Elder Denton" despite being a boy) is out being a missionary to the unwashed masses of that third world country, Queens. He is judge-y as hell, making comments about how his prospective converts are missing church because of stupid shit like WORK and how will they ever get a better life if they do not get their priorities straight? And of course everyone is so dirty and icky and poor, but giving 10% of their income to a new church will totes change that. I knew that missionaries believed this shit, but I am surprised that the CoJCoLDS lets them share so openly.

 

eldertcdenton.blogspot.com/

 

And he has a slide show of his own senior portraits on his blog, which is pretty damn snarkworthy in itself. His grammar is underwhelming.

 

It ends up Mr. White Privilege grew up in a 7000 sq ft home with a mom who is also a blogger. She is pretty boring, except when she says her children only wear seat belts about 60% of the time and stuff like that. I think we have snarked on her before? She seems familiar to me. One of the recent posts is terrifying. She is driving down the road with her unbuckled children, who are totally protected by The Heavenly Father because she tithes, bitches. And then she sees that the back door is open and her two year old is not in the car.

 

 

Quote

I braked as gently as I could, and the thought crossed my mind that at the speed I was going (about 10 mph) and the direction I had turned that it would be virtually impossible to run over her. I jumped out of the car, ran around to the other side of the car, only to see Evie's silky in the road about 20 feet behind us. I looked toward the vehicle, and Evie was hanging by both hands from the door handle, suspended in the air, pacifier still between her screaming lips. I ran to her, scooped her into my arms and held her close. As we walked back to retrieve the silky, she just kept muttering, "Scary. Scary. Scary."

 

 

bjdentonfamily.blogspot.com/2012/04/buying-new-car-installment-2-turn.html

[Pudicitia]

Am I correct in thinking that this blog is his mother blogging the emails he sends home under his name? If so, that's a whole different level of odd.

[terranova]

How the fuck is she not in jail for endangering the life of a child?

[Rachel333]

Am I correct in thinking that this blog is his mother blogging the emails he sends home under his name? If so, that's a whole different level of odd.

Yeah, and that's actually a really common thing to do. I used to read a bunch of missionary blogs, but they're all really frustrating. Pretty much what you'd expect from 19-23-year-olds who think they're representing God.

[synchroswimr]

One of the recent posts is terrifying. She is driving down the road with her unbuckled children, who are totally protected by The Heavenly Father because she tithes, bitches. And then she sees that the back door is open and her two year old is not in the car.

bjdentonfamily.blogspot.com/2012/04/buying-new-car-installment-2-turn.html

Holy Shit

[Peas n carrots]

Reading his blog is painful. Not only is it condenscending, but he says a lot without saying much. Amazing how someone seems to feel contempt towards those he is supposed to be helping.

I have a dear friend who is a Mormon (very liberal one at that) and she said to me that the point of missionary work isn't a contest to convert souls but it is supposed to be a personal journey to strengthen one's own faith. I'm not sure if that is what is taught across the board, just her experience or that this Elder Denton just really has no clue...but if it is he's doin' it wrong.

Btw said friend was a missionary in a town in Pennsylvania known for a scandal involving child molestors running free around a University's sports team. She has a lot of choice things to say about that place!

[Hane]

In one post, he's glad that a certain woman is getting married "because it's the right thing to do"--even though she'll be losing financial support from her ex. I gather she's a single mom in the inner city. I don't even.

I love how he berates a fellow missionary for a "lack of urgency." I get the feeling that the other guy understands these people far better than this guy does.

[LucySnowe]

Well I apologize for the aprubt ending to the email last week. There was a small fire in the library and they had to evacuate. That was cool.

...cool that the library (books and/or building) were on fire, possibly causing property damage? Cool that people's lives were endangered? Cool because this guy has his head so far up his ass he doesn't understand that flames are hot, rather than cool?

Ugh. Just ugh.

[Rachel333]

...cool that the library (books and/or building) were on fire, possibly causing property damage? Cool that people's lives were endangered? Cool because this guy has his head so far up his ass he doesn't understand that flames are hot, rather than cool?

Ugh. Just ugh.

In his defense, that was probably sarcastic. I have a habit of using "that was cool" the same way, as do a lot of other people I know.

[Deleted03]

Just reminds me of The Book Of Mormon musical "You and me song"

cA8hhIirp60

"Together we'll change the world, but mostly ME"

"Now that I'm 19 I'll do something that'll blow God's mind away"

[synchroswimr]

In his defense, that was probably sarcastic. I have a habit of using "that was cool" the same way, as do a lot of other people I know.

It sounds like he thought it was "fun" or "cool" to have the evacuation process. He could be sarcastic, but he could also just be naive and not have thought through his words

[Lady_M]

Holy Shit

[longskirtlotsakids]

Those images where he cockily sheds his jacket and tilts his huge catapillar eyebrows! He DEFRAUDS me!

Just kidding. There's nothing more laughable than a senior who thinks he's good lookin' trying to pose. That poor little kid. He's got his head up his won ass so far he thinks that light is God.

The best line? "He could miss the chance the chance to be with me forever!" He is not trying to get people to be with God, but just with him. That's close enough. :lol:

[emmiedahl]

And then there is the time that her little baby daughter ate some unfamiliar berries. Instead of grabbing a few berries as samples and rushing to the ER, she rubbed the juice on her lips to see if it tingled after 3 hours. Because anything poisonous would make her lips tingly and God knows poison cannot harm a small child in a few hours. bjdentonfamily.blogspot.com/2012/07/and-time-passes-so-wondrously.html

I am not judging because her daughter ate the berries. I spend a fair amount of time in the ER over incidents like this. Even the nurse or a park ranger or a local policeman could have told you whether the berries are safe.

Her daughters wear tees under their tanks to be modest and avoid defrauding grown men :roll:

[2xx1xy1JD]

Here's how I read her blog entry about the seatbelts:

The next morning, I was out visiting a friend with the two little ones. I've never been a real stickler for seat belts in our neighborhood, even though I do know better [because I'm lazy and/or stupid and/or completely negligent]. I've been a mom for a lot of years now [which makes it even more astonishing that I could be this much of an idiot], and seat belts and car seats are used--about 60% of the time [because I do sort of know about safety, but figure that my kids' lives are sort of like a game of blackjack at the casino, and that having the odds slightly in my favor is good enough.]. The new car was no exception. Even though Evie's seat was belted and strapped in, I just let her and Hyrum sit on the middle bench for the two-minute ride home [because I'm so incredibly lazy that I won't even use a car seat that's already there in the car, ready to go.].

I made the turn around the corner, and from here the world changed to slow motion. Suddenly I heard Evie scream. I looked in the rear-view mirror, and to my horror, I saw that the passenger side rear door was gaping open [because if I'm too stupid and lazy to use car seats and seatbelts, you can bet that I don't bother with the child safety lock, even though all cars have them] and Evie was nowhere in sight. Could this really be happening? [Well, yes, it could and it did happen. Why exactly are you surprised that a completely unrestrained child could open a car door that wasn't on child lock setting when there was no adult in the back seat?]

Look, I'll admit that I live in the land of super-protective helicopter parents, but this floors me. The only discussion here should have been if Evie should have been in a forward-facing car seat, or still riding in a rear-facing one (since there are safety advantages to extended rear-facing, such as reduced head/neck injuries). She was way too young to be out of a car seat. We just started allowing my son to ride without his booster seat, with just a seat belt, since he just turned 8.

She's damn lucky that this wasn't more serious. One of my first trials involved an infant who suffered broken ribs during a collison that took place in a parking lot. You don't need a high speed crash to cause injuries to small children.

[emesbe]

I am Mormon and I can definitively say that it does NOT fix everything.

[CanadianHippie]

Here's how I read her blog entry about the seatbelts:

The next morning, I was out visiting a friend with the two little ones. I've never been a real stickler for seat belts in our neighborhood, even though I do know better [because I'm lazy and/or stupid and/or completely negligent]. I've been a mom for a lot of years now [which makes it even more astonishing that I could be this much of an idiot], and seat belts and car seats are used--about 60% of the time [because I do sort of know about safety, but figure that my kids' lives are sort of like a game of blackjack at the casino, and that having the odds slightly in my favor is good enough.]. The new car was no exception. Even though Evie's seat was belted and strapped in, I just let her and Hyrum sit on the middle bench for the two-minute ride home [because I'm so incredibly lazy that I won't even use a car seat that's already there in the car, ready to go.].

I made the turn around the corner, and from here the world changed to slow motion. Suddenly I heard Evie scream. I looked in the rear-view mirror, and to my horror, I saw that the passenger side rear door was gaping open [because if I'm too stupid and lazy to use car seats and seatbelts, you can bet that I don't bother with the child safety lock, even though all cars have them] and Evie was nowhere in sight. Could this really be happening? [Well, yes, it could and it did happen. Why exactly are you surprised that a completely unrestrained child could open a car door that wasn't on child lock setting when there was no adult in the back seat?]

Look, I'll admit that I live in the land of super-protective helicopter parents, but this floors me.

Compared to this woman, I think most parents live in the land of super-protective helicopter parents!

[FaustianSlip]

Ugh. He sounds like an insufferable douche, and if he took the attitude in person with me that he takes in his blog, I would run like the wind. I also can't help but wonder what his reaction would be if one of his "investigators" ran across his blog. Or, perhaps hitting something he cares about more, whether he thinks people would be likely to listen to his sales pitch if they had seen the way he writes about them and their city. His mother isn't really doing him or their religion any favors by posting that stuff- it confirms all of the worst stereotypes I've heard about missionaries (not just Mormon ones, to clarify) and shows virtually none of the good. I'm glad that I know a fair number of Mormons in real life, so I can be reasonably assured that he's just an idiot, but he (and his mother) may want to consider that he may be the only Mormon a lot of people ever meet. Of course, Mom can't even plan ahead enough to buckle her damn kids in the car, so fat chance of that happening.

I'd be curious to get an update five years or so post-mission and see whether he's completely bought into the church or has abandoned it entirely. From what I hear, it tends to be one or the other.

[fundiefun]

I do wonder what would happen if someone forwarded his blog to those in charge of missionaries in his area since its clear he's a hateful person and lacks compassion which most mormon missionaries are supposed to have I wonder if they would suspend him

[Jessica]

^ That's a very good idea.

[fundiefun]

Where would you even forward it to

[Terrie]

What a smug little dick. That age is never fun except when you are that age.

[FaustianSlip]

There used to be an "ask a missionary" chat on the LDS.org site. If someone wanted to, they could probably go there, link to this guy's blog and just ask, "So... is this guy representative of how you treat newcomers and prospective converts? He's wearing your name tag, after all. And if he's not representative, maybe you should tell him to shut it."

The thing is, loathe as I am to defend this guy, he can't really control if Mom is posting his e-mails online, unless he asked her to do it. I'm pretty sure mishies can only access e-mail at all through a special, filtered e-mail system provided by the church. I wonder if he's aware that she's posting his e-mails to her. He must be, right?

[fundiefun]

I asked the question and I wonder what they will say because having talked to missionaries in the past most of them seemed like genuine caring people and were very friendly and willing to discuss their beliefs.

[emmiedahl]

I asked the question and I wonder what they will say because having talked to missionaries in the past most of them seemed like genuine caring people and were very friendly and willing to discuss their beliefs.

That is very much the image that the church tries to put out. In personal relationships I have found that there is a great deal of superiority and the general belief that everyone else is doing it wrong.