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Found 13 results

  1. Justme

    New corners are up! (Maxwell)

    Steve's is rather stupid, well, more stupid than usual. It's basically "why men work".... Teri's is about exercise. And, {gasp} she includes a link to fitness video's. First, the lady is wearing PANTS! Second, video's = TV!! The BEAST!! Watching a video on your monitor is no different than watching it on THE BEAST! What next, letting the Grandkids watch Barney, throwing back a bottle of wine saying it's "grape juice"!
  2. daisyjane1234

    Maxwell Corner: Stay at home adult daughters

    Steve and Terri have posted their Jan '14 Mom's/Dad's Corner on the topic of stay at home adult daughters. No surprises in this post where they respond, or should I say Steve responds, to a question on the subject posed by a reader. Steve (and Terri's?) responses state the following: 1) Their adult daughters stay at home and refrain from working outside the home by choice. They do not address the issue of how they might respond should one of their daughters wish to pursue employment or education outside the home. Their daughters desire the protection and safety of home and will remain there until marriage. This means that they will likely remain at home until they die since Steve and Terri have apparently made provisions that the house remains for their use upon their death. 2) Should they pass away their daughters have sufficient marketable skills to support themselves. (Ummm. Sure). 3) When Steve and Terri became parents they chose to have Terri remain at home. They then decided they "desired" this for their grandchildren as well. 4) Their daughters are not isolated, but rather have ample opportunity to engage in relationships and activities outside the home. I think #3 is the one that most bothers me. The idea that they made choices for their own family is fine. Dysfunctional. Borderline abusive. Controlling as hell. But fine. The idea that they made choices on behalf of their future daughters-in-law annoys the crap out of me. I know. I know. Steve would only have allowed his sons to meet and marry women who would totally agree to such a proposal. But I always thought their sons had some degree of autonomy once they left they left the home. Perhaps not as much as we think? The other part that annoys me is the fact that despite Steve asserting that his daughters are not-isolated/sheltered/controlled their voice is never allowed to weigh in on the topic of their own life. These daughters are adult in age only.
  3. The Maxwell parents addressed a question in their latest Corners that we've often asked here. Namely, what will happen to the female siblings if they never marry. According to Steve and Teri, they have given their daughters skills that they can use if they ever need to support themselves. If they never marry, the house will one day be theirs when Steve and Teri pass on. Meanwhile, they have, ahem, chosen, to have shelter, protection, and, of course, accountability, and so they live at home. I don't buy any of it. The unmarried siblings have "chosen" to live at home because Steve and Teri have made it clear that is what they wanted. They say so in the article itself, and also say they've envisioned the same for their grandchildren. The skills they mention each sister has might get them low level, entry level jobs, but it would be awfully tough to make a decent living at jobs like those. And finally, even if the sisters really were allowed to live in the Maxwell house alone, after Steve and Teri pass on, would they honestly be able to get over the idea that grown women still need sheltering and protection? Oh, and accountability, let's not forget that. I think Steve and Teri have written what they think people want to hear, but I don't buy any of it. ETA: the link titus2.com/corners/moms-corner/older-daughters-living-at-home.html
  4. Sarah posted an entire Mom's Corner in the blog. It's about siblings (pt 7). {{yawnnn}} I just skimmed it. Guess even the FREE corners are lacking in traffic.
  5. Their most recent Mom's Corner is typical Maxwellian. Their kids get along sooooo great. The girls and boys spend hours and hours together and still find stuff to talk about at night! And since the siblings get along so well, they WANT to all share bedrooms. What's interesting is this: My heart rejoices with these kinds of interactions between the girls because it proves that they enjoy each other, they choose to be together, and they will maintain those relationships throughout their lives even when they are married with families of their own. Are the Maxwell parents so naive to think that just because their kids "get along" now, that this guarantees they will hold this closeness through marriages, kids, and (possibly) long distance? I had this type of magic thinking when I was little when I swore BFF on kids moving to another school. Having endured multiple moves now, I know that my relationship can and will change with each new development in my life. School, work, marriage. All of these things will redefine my relationships. Some will drift away, others I will maintain. But I rarely maintain the same type of intimacy when separated from people through time and distance. Honestly, I feel the Maxwell parents maintain their lifestyle because they want to keep their kids in perpetual infantile state. The thing is, it's normal for kids to leave the nest, and part of life is knowing sibling relationships will change, maybe even turn sour. That's just life. Even in the Maxwell kids limited lives, if the daughters marry someone in another state, they may end up with close girl friends, or become closer to their own family. It's interesting that despite their harping about sibling relationships, Steve and Teri themselves don't seem to enjoy the "same" type of closeness with their immediate family members. Does Teri keep in daily contact with her sister? Does Steve keep in close contact with his mother living in another state or the sibling that cares for mom? You'd think they understand that the nature progression of life is people's lives are constantly changing. You cannot expect the same family dynamic once your children move out. Siblings will marry and have kids. Some will pull apart, others will maintain closeness. I don't think sharing all this togetherness is healthy or guarantees that the Maxwell children will not gravitate towards future spouses or children. It just amazes me how naive the parents are to think their kids will continue in this state once they marry and have their own children to tend to. When families write us about problems their children have gotten into concerning the Internet, their phones, outside relationships, music, and more, those children often had their own bedrooms. They had the privacy to give in to temptation when they were faced with it. Having one's own bedroom does not, in of itself, bring horrible things into children's lives. Instead of talking about "accountability" (code word for having a perpetual spy), how about personal responsibility? Here again, the Maxwell parents have this weird, child-like perspective of the world. Things are either black or white. People share bedrooms and stay pure or have their own bedroom and end up doing heroin. Teens can either stay Christian and at home or go to college and become feminist abortionists. There's no middle ground with them. No understanding of the complexity of the world. I think fundies in general have this issue. It's why they observe such a literal interpretation of the Bible. A more nuanced perspective would require a higher level thinking that they avoid in general. For the Maxwells, this type of simplistic thinking bleeds into every aspect of their lives. They can't fathom their family dynamic shifting. They try to walk through the basic milestones of life by letting married sons out of the house, but their psychological hold maintains. Even married sons still come back to Casa Maxwell regularly. The weird thing for me is the Maxwell parents should know better. Steve and Teri talk about being each others' best (and only) friends because that's supposedly what married people do. Steve appears to have distance from his parents, especially his father. Both write of shutting out family members who expose their children to nonMaxwell approved beliefs. Yet, they turn around and proclaim that their own children would never separate from each other, that they will always be so close, and maintain the same belief system. As I grow older, I come to realize I do not have control over everything. My carefully laid plans has veered off course on many occasions. The relationships I cultivate change as I change. I learn that life can provide surprises whether I welcome them or not. Yet, the Maxwells seem so smug in their magical thinking that they will never change, that this carefully controlled environment will never get disrupted, that everyone will live close by and raise their children to fall under the thralls of the Almighty Steve. I guess they believe their controlled lives inoculates them against outside influences. Is this arrogance or just naivety to think they can control their life like that?
  6. jockosmom

    New Corners

    New Corners are up on the Titus 2 blog - This gem from Steve - And from Teri - Poor Teri. No more Pepsi since her commanding officer, er, I mean husband, has forbidden it.
  7. kpmom

    Teri M. and her bad attitude

    The is from this month's Mom's Corner. Teri is talking about how unproductive feeling sorry for one's self is; "Let me give you a personal example of this. I have lived with chronic back pain for many years. One day last week, I had my normal back pain plus a new pain that caused me to hurt every time I took a deep breath. I knew this new pain was temporary and would be gone in a day or two, but it still hurt right then. In addition, I had a sort of allergic reaction in my mouth that was causing the roof of my mouth to burn, ache, and itch. That morning a family member shared with me something I had said to them that they felt had an attitude behind it." What do you suppose Teri said, and to whom? What are the odds it wasn't Steve?
  8. Justme

    Weird new corner.....

    First Stevie says any man & woman can live happily in a marriage if they want to..... (I'm not so sure of that, there are many many people I could not be happily married to.) Then he goes on about how he & Teri "love the children so much" (Stevie, I've got news for you, they are NOT children any more) but still make time for "dates". Then he gushes on about how much he "appreaciates" Teri, etc.... I wonder if he got a lot of emails telling him what a tyrant he was making him show his "softer" side. Also, Teri's talks about how ill Granddad is getting. Poor Granddad. It's got to be so hard on Gigi seeing her husband so ill.
  9. allyisyourpally5

    December Corner Time!

    Teri's sucking the fun out of Christmas: Our family chooses to celebrate Christmas because it focuses on the magnificent miracle of the birth of our Savior. Plus it is one of two holidays in which even the world expects Christians to participate. Since when did they do what the World tells them? and why do they care about the world anyway? We didn't want our children believing in Santa Claus only to find out later it was a lie. Some would say it is all in fun, but the reality is that it is deceitful. Shame on all you Santa parents out there. I personally was not too upset that Santa wasn't real and really appreciate the fun of it. Even though Santa Claus was no longer a part of this aspect of our Christmas, a couple of years later we simply wanted to be free of any association with Santa Claus in our Christmas celebration, so we even set aside the stockings. I guess little Bethany and Abby will never get the joy of waking up to find a stocking at the end of the bed. We also decided to stop getting a Christmas tree. While we wouldn't say that Jeremiah 10:3-4 is talking about a Christmas tree directly, there are many similarities that are too powerful to ignore. In addition, I know I sometimes sat and admired the beautiful Christmas tree rather than worshiping my worthy Savior. "For the customs of the people are vain: for one cutteth a tree out of the forest, the work of the hands of the workman, with the axe. They deck it with silver and with gold; they fasten it with nails and with hammers, that it move not" (Jeremiah 10:3-4). I take it the Christmas tree has become an idol? or do they really just need to learn to chill the hell out? I have very fond memories (and still enjoy the occasion now) of decorating the tree and house as a family. It's a few weeks of a year, does it really matter? As a family, we like to participate in a shoe box outreach where we purchase small toys and personal items to be placed inside a shoe box and given to a needy child in a third world country. We began doing this when a national ministry started a shoe box Christmas program. In more recent years, two missionaries to Mexico whom we support, have begun their own small-scale shoe box ministry. They collect the shoe boxes and then personally distribute them to children in their towns. That has made the shoe box shopping and giving even more special to our family because we have been able to see photos of our gifts being given to children. Now I actually credit them here because I do this also and spend considerable time doing so. It is our heart's desire that all of our neighbors would come to a saving knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life" (John 3:16). Aside from the awful singing., it is nice of them to take something like the bread or cookies to peoples homes. But I really dislike the assumption that no-one around them is "saved" We have made a tradition of planning an evening near Christmas to take the family out to eat and then to drive around looking at Christmas lights. Is this not slightly contradictive? No decorations in the home because they are the wrong focus, but let's go and admire everyone elses? (and let them pay the electricity bill for that matter) Opening our presents and having our Christmas meal on Christmas Eve now allows us time to go to the nursing home on Christmas Day. Happy Christmas Elderly, a day of Maxwell torture May I suggest that you evaluate with your husband what is important for your family during the Christmas season and make sure that your time is invested in those priorities. Be sure Christmas is purposefully utilized to draw your children's hearts to Jesus Christ and to serving Him. God forbid you think about this alone. Onto Steves gem of a corner: Here is the email it is based on (from a reader) My husband and I attended a recent conference of yours. We were so blessed by it. We wanted to say thank you. My husband decided after listening to Manager of His Home that our children were no longer going to go to youth group on Wednesday nights. He did this because we started noticing changes in our children. Our children hadn't gone to youth group for six weeks when the pastor came by and asked us why our children weren't attending. My husband told him that a big part of it was the secular rock and roll they were playing. Our children were coming home humming it. We were told that they believe if your children are firmly grounded in Christ it will not affect them. I couldn't help but think about our twenty-one-year-old daughter who wound up getting into secular music due to a youth group and her dad and me not having her heart. We didn't want that for our other children. Bit of self praising first, gotta keep that in! So the Maxwells are really sucking the fun out of all kids lives. What is wrong with humming music? Praise the Lord for this dad taking action to protect his children. Ephesians 6:4 tells us, "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." Dad is the one God holds responsible for discipling the children, does it actually say in the bible that Dads will be held up by God to talk about how they disciplined? Does mum just slip straight through to Heaven? I have met many youth group leaders and pastors over the years, and I have heard them share their deep love and concern for the youth to which they minister. Amen. Generally, they have a sincere desire to reach the kids who aren't living in a home where they are being discipled. Please don't feel this Dad's Corner is a personal criticism of youth group leaders. It isn't. Instead this Corner addresses flaws in the youth group in regard to our readers who are dads who are discipling their children as the Lord leads. So....really it is taking a dig at the youth groups and saying what the Leaders do (so many do such a wonderful job, I looked up to many of my leader across youth group and other clubs as well as my parents)is not according to what God wants Dad is the one God gives the responsibility to disciple the children, and Dad is the one who will answer to God. Can't take control from Daddy Considering there will be multiple children in the group, how likely is it that the discipling in the group is consistent with all the fathers' direction since seldom will each family be truly like-minded. Can you imagine a room full of youth with all their fathers basically being "Steves"? it would be a very silent room Let's consider the statement: "If your children are firmly grounded in Christ, then it will not affect them." When is a person firmly grounded in Christ, and even if they are, does that mean they won't be tempted toward evil? Sadly, we have talked to many parents who trusted that their children were spiritually mature enough to stay the course only for the parents to be heartbroken later. I wonder how old these children were? Or if they did actually completely loose faith or simply just not live exactly as the Maxwells teach? The girl mentioned in the readers email is 21 -perfectly old enough to make her own mind up about anything. These parents are downright awful There is also tremendous internal pressure by most children to be accepted by the peers in the group. I've heard some say that one of the greatest pressures a person can feel is the need to be accepted. Therefore, peer groups likely exert some of the greatest pressure to conform that any of us will ever experience. Let me share an example with you. Years ago we were in a fairly conservative church. Despite the conservative nature of the church, many of the girls were pushing the limits in their "dress" and definitely lacking modesty standards. Our daughter, who was then eighteen, confided to us that she was feeling turmoil inside because she wanted to fit in with the other girls but didn't want to do what they were doing. That peer pressure was experienced just by causal associations with the girls at church. Consider the peer pressure that comes from even more involvement in the peer group. Do we really think our children will be stronger than that? This probably answers a question - Sarah wanted to fit in. over a decade later she is still at home. Never ever mention you want to join in with anything more than 5 meters from Steve or you will be doomed forever. Sorry this is long, the corners got me this month!
  10. New Mom and Dad's Corners are out on the Maxwell's site. Steve's is on church youth groups, and I know this will shock you, but he's against them! http://www.titus2.com/corners/12-11-d.htm Here is the email he received that led to this (and probably parts 2-113) corner; My husband and I attended a recent conference of yours. We were so blessed by it. We wanted to say thank you. My husband decided after listening to Manager of His Home that our children were no longer going to go to youth group on Wednesday nights. He did this because we started noticing changes in our children. Our children hadn't gone to youth group for six weeks when the pastor came by and asked us why our children weren't attending. My husband told him that a big part of it was the secular rock and roll they were playing. Our children were coming home humming it. We were told that they believe if your children are firmly grounded in Christ it will not affect them. I couldn't help but think about our twenty-one-year-old daughter who wound up getting into secular music due to a youth group and her dad and me not having her heart. We didn't want that for our other children. So this 21 year old has chosen to listen to secular music thanks to this youth group. Maybe she decided, hey I'm 21 and I'm going to listen to something besides conservative Christian music? Does this have to mean that they've "lost her heart"? Maybe she's just decided to be her own woman at 21? Does it have to mean she's lost her salvation?
  11. allyisyourpally5

    It's Corner time again!

    I'm just gonna make it my monthly duty to round these up, I cannot resist the snark....though sometimes they make me so sad or so angry....anyway, here we go. Teri's Corner is basically another "BUY MY BOOK!" article: On the practical side of self-discipline, I have found that using a schedule helps me not to be lazy......For more detailed information on scheduling, I would recommend Managers of Their Homes. In other words "I won't tell you how to not be lazy and schedule your family in a Godly way to get you to Heaven for free, you must buy my book" An email asked about productive activities. A mom seemed to suggest she doess not want her children just working all the time and asked if such activities like playing in the sandbox with her kids was ok (wtf?) I would encourage Amber that raising children and keeping house are not mutually exclusive. Playing with the children is a productive activity, but only when it is balanced with the necessary housework. If all a mom does is play with the children, then it would become a lazy choice, especially if she is avoiding her household responsibilities by doing it. I work with children....playing with them all the time is certainly not being lazy! It is very hard work! Keep playing in the sandbox Amber, keep doing it. Another way that I can direct you toward self-discipline is to make use of those little bits of time that are easily wasted whether one is using a schedule or not. Here is an example of that. In the morning, Steve and I walk for an hour, then I hang on an inversion table for my back, and next comes personal Bible reading and prayer time. Before I start my Bible reading, I prepare a moist heating pad by putting it in the microwave for three minutes. Here is what I was able to accomplish in those three minutes when I tracked it one morning to share with you. â—¦Got out vitamins. â—¦Washed up several dishes sitting in the sink. â—¦Took soiled towels to the washing machine. â—¦Put items away that were out on the counter. I could have spent those three minutes simply doing nothing or looking through a catalog. This is often the temptation when there are just a few minutes available. Oh boy. Every. Single. Minute. Of. Your. Life. Needs. A. Schedule. Oh my....
  12. Justme


    Next installments of ongoing subjects. (I haven't had time to read them yet.)
  13. Justme

    New corners are up.

    Teri's is "mahh", just about not being lazy. Daddy is on "fire" again after schools, particularly charter schools. Of course, "their" onramp "school" is OK! P.S. Poor Teri can't even buy a bathroom rug on her own. Steve has to "help". Me, I just run down to Bed & Bath. I wonder if the girls have ever been in a shopping mall. I'll bet Steve has them convinced they are full of lust & nakked people..... I wonder if the girls even drive. Could you imagine being 30, living in the 'burbs and not being able to drive....
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