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Buffy's Commentary

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'Tis the Season...for Audits

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HerNameIsBuffy

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Most of my job involves IT.  IT is what I do, it's how I self-identify, it's how I spend the majority of most days.  But there is another part of my position which doesn't take up a lot of time because it's easier...but when it does hijack my work life it does it full force.

I'm the head of QA.  Quality Assurance.  Lead Internal Auditor.  I have a clip board and everything.  

For those of you unfamiliar with this highly sought after position (which no one wanted and I got by default because I am inherently pedantic and critical.  Thanks, Dad!)

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Sure the rest of the country is preparing for Thanksgiving next week, but I'm preparing for an external surveillance audit next week.  Nothing kicks off the holidays like having outsiders come in and crawl right up your ass...and the only way to prepare for that is for me to spend the next couple of days doing the same to everyone here.  

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I know this will sound pollyannaish but I actually have a pretty solid set of professional ethics and I wouldn't run a system which needed to be pencil whipped or overhauled right before an external audit.  But as I tell my people, it's like preparing your house for Grandma to come visit.  If you have to call the people from Hoarders to get their contacts with the dumpsters and Bobcats you're screwed.  But even if you've been doing a nice job maintaining you still want to get out the guest towels and the fancy soap.

And shove the vacuum a bunch of places you haven't looked in a while.

So there are literally a couple hundred people behind the wall of my office who will spend the next couple of days avoiding eye contact with me, silently willing me to keep walking and pick another victim because apparently this...

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and this...

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is terrifying.

But I'm so not scary...just because I'm not going to say this (without sarcasm)...

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Doesn't mean you're in trouble...if everyone just follows the advice below we'll be just fine...

 

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clueliss

Posted

I audit internally at times from an accounting perspective.  I also have a clipboard. and a tool belt (no really, I keep my physical inventory 'supplies' in it because experience taught me that it is a royal PITA to be in a subbasement or back end of a warehouse and need a flashlight?  magnifying glass? (you ever try to read labels?  wedged between two tight pallets?  in the dark or near dark?), pencil or pen because the one in your hand stopped working?  tape measure (you have NO idea but I have needed one for at least two employers for vastly different material), etc etc etc.  And the belt evolved because I ran out of pockets.  

We are between external audit rounds at the moment.  (January is coming).  

And I am currently nagging one purchasing card holder for his monthly log which is late (and I have to do full audits on these sucker so where is it?)

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HerNameIsBuffy

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I audit internally at times from an accounting perspective.  I also have a clipboard. and a tool belt (no really, I keep my physical inventory 'supplies' in it because experience taught me that it is a royal PITA to be in a subbasement or back end of a warehouse and need a flashlight?  magnifying glass? (you ever try to read labels?  wedged between two tight pallets?  in the dark or near dark?), pencil or pen because the one in your hand stopped working?  tape measure (you have NO idea but I have needed one for at least two employers for vastly different material), etc etc etc.  And the belt evolved because I ran out of pockets.  

We are between external audit rounds at the moment.  (January is coming).  

And I am currently nagging one purchasing card holder for his monthly log which is late (and I have to do full audits on these sucker so where is it?)

Me, too!  Not a belt, but my clip board has a compartment for extra pens, pens in other colors, magnifying glass, tape measure (NIST certified), printed relevant procedures (properly stamped for reference only, 'natch) - and YES I have tried to read labels like that - yesterday and again in a few minutes!

I've had to read labels by the light of a hello kitty wallpapered razor phone back in the day because for validation/verification I couldn't find the freaking lights to the plant!

Between my auditing jacket with pockets and clipboard with the compartment I am pretty well covered, but if i need one I'm going belt!

Up until this year cost accounting fell under my wheelhouse, but thank God they finally hired a controller so after this next inventory hopefully the trade-off will be complete and will be his headache.  Although interesting how I headed up inventory and the accounting breakdowns for almost 10 years alone, but now it's suddenly a two person job.  Oh well - happy to just assist rather than lead that one.  Freaking nightmare.  I'm not an accountant, but had enough otj to do the in-house to send to the externals for auditing.  

 

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