Duff beer for me! Duff beer for you! I'll have a Duff - you have one too!

No opening credits to speak of. Couch gag: The Simpsons run into their living room, are sucked through a portal over the couch, and are returned to the living room, where they repeat the loop over and over. Finally, Bart demolishes the portal and enjoys the living room to himself (except for Homer's head).

Springfield is having a bike festival, which brings all of the citizens out cycling in their unique and wacky ways. Duffman puts in his usual appearance, but in attempting a hip-swivel salute to the troops, he throws out his back (it makes sense in context). Springfield keeps vigil outside the hospital until Dr. Hibbert makes the grave announcement - Duffman is having a hip replacement, and for the time being, there will be no Duffman. Everyone is stunned.

The town plunges into mourning, and Kent Brockman announces a search for a new Duffman. Let me guess - Homer, right?

Homer suggests this right away, which Marge decisively vetoes, fearing an even drunker husband than usual. He protests that it will win him the friends he's always longed for, and extra lines in his obituary, which he somehow needs despite having more accomplishments than any human who has ever lived. He eagerly starts practicing hip thrusts while Marge and the kids stare in horror.

"So You Think You Can Duff?" kicks off to great fanfare. Cat Deeley hosts, of course. A bunch of stereotypical judges select the new champion - but who? My vote is for Groundskeeper Willie. Homer inexplicably performs well, despite having little experience at bartending or physical exercise. He nails the "Oh, yeah!" though. Do I even need to say who wins?

Well, okay, he's runner-up, but Lisa was runner-up at Little Miss Springfield too, so I'm not holding my breath. This is reinforced when they don't even bother to give the winner a name, just Contestant #12. Wow. Are they actually paying the current writers?

And indeed, the new Duffman's reign lasts about 3.5 seconds, when someone notices that he has a tattoo from a rival brewery. We get what appears to be the umpteenth Game of Thrones parody on this show, centering around Duff Gardens with Homer as its king. In some kind of chapel, Homer vows to be loyal in his "Duffwatch". The family is then taken on a tour of the Duff factory, which involves old commercials and some bogus history. The kids find the super secret Duff formula, locked in an incredibly complex safe, which Maggie unlocks in about half a second.

When the kids are gone, Marge expresses her concern about the demands of the job. The CEO spins some stories about how beer was a big player in the beginning of agriculture (it's kinda true!) and remains a tradition of society to this day. The CEO then has Homer implanted with a microchip - one which can detect the presence of alcohol. You see, Homer is able to promote beer. He just can't drink it.

Yeah, it makes a lot of sense, but he goes into BSOD about it anyway. And is that Lunchlady Doris as one of the attenadants? Back on topic. While Homer tries to kill himself, Marge assures the CEO that Homer is only in on this for the respect and responsibility. Even so, when she takes a sip, Homer licks her lips. He immediately goes into seizures.

Everyone at Moe's is bummed for Homer, but won't do anything to help him because Moe really likes the Duff sign lighting the bar. Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa steal the t-shirt cannons, firing one straight into a portrait of Maude next door. I see what you did there!

Homer's first few events go well. He has a hit commercial, and sales skyrocket. In fact, he can pretty much do no wrong as Duffman. Best of all, he finally gets to go up in the Duff blimp, not that anyone will ever refer to that. Sigh.

He takes Marge up there on a date, where he is invited to look through the telescope. It's a sad picture of Springfield - litter everywhere and drunks stumbling around. Homer feels guilty.

After inexplicably surviving a blimp fire (long story), Homer discusses his feelings with Marge. He realizes that changes need to be made. Soon enough, all Duff events are serving non-alcoholic beer only. The reaction is pretty predictable. Homer is forced to flee an angry mob. The CEO gives him an ultimatum - prove that he still loves beer, or lose his job. Cut to a completely wasted Homer trying to drink Surly while Marge sighs.

At Moe's, Homer is happy to have his freedom, but just can't get back into bar life. One of the barflies recognizes him as Duffman of before - so that's good enough for him! Meanwhile, the CEO tracks down the old Duffman at a sandwich shop and gives him his job back.

The end credits are incredibly poignant, showing video clips from an interview with recently deceased co-creator Sam Simon. "One of the greatest minds ever/Thank you Sam" appears in the credits. It's just perfect.

So, this episode? Pretty meh. We're back into rehashing everything - Homer's relationship with alcohol (including enforced sobriety), Homer's new jobs, tension in the marriage. The guilt thing was a nice twist, but on the other hand, we've seen Homer's guilt manifest itself in other ways. At this point, "Simpsons already did it" has been a cliche for over a decade. On the bright side, we've had a look into the life of Duffman. What could be more fun than that?

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