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Paradigm Lost

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Curious
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Lisafer has verified with us ~ Curious

Introduction


Lisafer

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Hi everyone, and thanks so much for welcoming me into the Free Jinger community! I'm very excited to be here. Please pardon any glitches with my new blog, since I'm just learning.

To introduce myself: I was born into a large family, and homeschooled all the way through high school. My parents were from fairly normal American middle-class backgrounds, not fundie at all, but over time they became absolutely entrenched in the Christian fundamentalist way of thinking. We attended church services at a Reformed Presbyterian church (RPCNA) for almost my entire childhood, after my parents left a more mainstream denomination.

I'm going to use fake names in this blog, if I have to use names, as my siblings did not ask to be part of my story. I might change a few minor details as well, to keep certain people's privacy. Not that any of you would know us! We were very small fish in the pond, and my parents' attempts to indoctrinate us failed miserably for the most part. We are a family of stubborn, determined people, and by our late teens most of us were most determinedly going our own way. 

But I think that all of us, in different ways, were hurt by the attitudes and doctrines of fundamentalism. I, personally, was extremely hurt. I have had multiple counselors to work through years of guilt and fear induced by black-and-white doctrines and controlling personalities. I have mental illness, which was exacerbated by my upbringing. And I want to write about what I went through. It helps me process, and maybe it will help somebody else too. 

 

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  • Posts

    • SassyPants

      Posted

      I would think having already experienced a uterine rupture, and IIRC this was with Freddy and about 3 weeks before his due date, Jill is in a higher than average risk for untoward events and likely is on a very individualized OBGYN plan. Navigating a pregnancy and safe birth after having had a previous uterine rupture and never having had a vaginal delivery has to make Jill’s care quite unique. I hope she utilizes high risk maternal/fetal practitioners. 

    • Giraffe

      Posted

      1 minute ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

      You weren’t ready for college….. that’s why you dropped out.

      You weren’t ready for that new job…. So you were fired.

      You weren’t ready to potty train… so you gave up after a week.

      You weren’t ready to homeschool….. so your kids fell behind.

      You weren’t ready to buy that house…. So you were denied a loan. 
       

      Does she not realize that when you aren’t ready, things can fail spectacularly? I try very hard not to place expectations on my kids that they can’t handle. They aren’t ready for algebra. So I’m not going to force them to learn it. Her thinking is completely flawed. 

      Exactly! There are way more instances where "no, you're not actually ready" is the appropriate response. 

      • Upvote 1
    • JermajestyDuggar

      Posted

      You weren’t ready for college….. that’s why you dropped out.

      You weren’t ready for that new job…. So you were fired.

      You weren’t ready to potty train… so you gave up after a week.

      You weren’t ready to homeschool….. so your kids fell behind.

      You weren’t ready to buy that house…. So you were denied a loan. 
       

      Does she not realize that when you aren’t ready, things can fail spectacularly? I try very hard not to place expectations on my kids that they can’t handle. They aren’t ready for algebra. So I’m not going to force them to learn it. Her thinking is completely flawed. 

      • Upvote 1
      • I Agree 1
    • Giraffe

      Posted

      Here's the thing. "You're never going to be ready so you might as well do it now" can actually be good advice - in very specific situations! But overall as a general post for your broader audience? That's horrible advice! It's also profoundly tone deaf and painfully unaware of her own immense privilege. It's easy to have kids & to start your own business from scratch when "from scratch" is having access to hundreds of thousands of dollars! 

      • I Agree 1
    • hoipolloi

      Posted

      And an endorsement from America's favorite fake historian:

      BillPOtterFakeHistorian.thumb.png.e61bafff049a3083b22f1dc635dadd6b.png

      • Upvote 1


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