Jump to content
  • Sky
  • Blueberry
  • Slate
  • Blackcurrant
  • Watermelon
  • Strawberry
  • Orange
  • Banana
  • Apple
  • Emerald
  • Chocolate
  • Charcoal
  • entries
    16
  • comments
    68
  • views
    1,699

Edens Year 11: The Return of the Sister-Mom

neurogirl

988 views

Welcome back to 66 Goodbook Avenue! We've been away for a while, but now we're back with an eventful year 11 in the Eden saga. 

Leviticus began 2020 in a "bear phase" which is SEVERELY testing his fundie parents. (Though at least it's not a "unicorn phase" or something) Here, Eva experiences the trials of a large family as she tries to feed and dress her brood in time for church. It takes a good 2 hours plus one bear-less Leviticus in tears. 

5acc2bef766d4_03-30-18_5-19-57PM.thumb.png.886dbb25dd7e822a4b963700d091ffd1.png

Ah what a beautiful Sunday at True Believer's Baptist Church. We are surely in store for an uplifting message of loving thy neighbors whom are destined for Hell :my_angel:

5acc2be0a4b52_03-30-18_5-35-26PM.thumb.png.88b5032c5c82bfd7fcecd45177861878.png

The wholesome gang's all here (baby Ruth not pictured)...including Elsie and Cale! And Elsie has a SHOCKING UPDATE for the Edens...

5acc2bd11dc2c_03-30-18_5-37-28PM.thumb.png.82c43e02889ecb3e8837e3714b57d558.png

She's expecting!!!!! Eva is of course, WAY more pregnant with her 9TH BLESSING, and Elsie is only in her first trimester with her first *cough Jill* but what a SWEET SISTER BUMP PIC they took together! God is so good!!!

Eva and Adam also celebrated their 10th anniversary! "I just want to thank the Lord for his greatest blessing to me- my wonderful husband Adam. He works so hard for our family and leads us all closer to Lord. He's a great daddy and also not bad to look at! I thank the Lord for you honey and hope for many wonderful years together! -Eva" "Happy anniversary Eva! How many kids do we have now? -Adam"

5acc2bc4ac1e6_03-30-18_5-45-11PM.thumb.png.87c4e2476ec419c84452db98c05ff477.png

8 Adam. You have 8 children now.

5acc2ba4df6b7_03-30-18_6-13-02PM.thumb.png.1990d8ea37cd45571cb755feb1648386.png

Just kidding Adam! You now have 9 children! Welcome to the world baby Samuel! We can't wait to see what the Lord has in store for you!

Precious baby Ruth aged up to an inquisitive toddler just in the nick of time. She and the next youngest, Judges, will probably be very good friends (both curious) until she has to be trained up as a lady. Enjoy childhood while it lasts Ruth! Come on, give us a smile!

5acc2bb4beb2e_03-30-18_6-09-09PM.thumb.png.b11c8b10eb88b0683131c5cc3504ee4c.png

She's so precious. 

5acc2ebec889c_04-06-18_10-57-51PM.thumb.png.4157f27fa044f704804300940d3cc499.png

Ohh! That looks like the face of a fundie who just found out she's been blessed by the Lord again! Get prepared for child 10 Adam! That should be an easy number to remember.

5acc2ea515a17_04-06-18_11-33-23PM.thumb.png.857404fe1356e421abc50c40fce49bc4.png

A pregnant Elsie visited the Edens to celebrate Joshua's birthday! This angelic, forgotten toddler is now a good, forgotten 4 year-old. Happy birthday Joshua! Mommy and daddy love you so much, even if they don't know who you are!

5acc2e8633599_04-07-18_3-02-55PM.thumb.png.c849db1e244b963f3b896cb2694a389f.png

As a minor detail, some of the children went to the park and curious little Judges got to be king of his own world for a moment. Free Judges!

5acc30c160c0e_04-07-18_9-05-58PM.thumb.png.35c2378c4cd003d985a66ed7e7513256.png

But back to the main story, it was getting rough y'all. 9 kids and another on the way. Messes, fights, diapers, the inexorable piles of laundry...something had to be done. 

Congratulations Genesis! For your 11th birthday we got you...a toddler! That's right! Precious first-born Genesis is being promoted to sister-mom and given a buddy of her very own- little 1yr-old Ruth. This was earlier than intended of course, but Genesis is just so mature for her age. And she loves it too! Plus Mama Eva is just far too busy with unsafe diaper changes to have time for her second-youngest. (Or third. Or fourth. Or...)

5acc3096d8ec7_04-09-18_7-13-58PM.thumb.png.22d9714bb128748a17069f37956bc800.png

5acc30a05e705_04-09-18_7-08-55PM.thumb.png.c9a7aac3ae874c83531a6e8a3deb2ab8.png5acc30ad1d209_04-09-18_6-25-34PM.thumb.png.10c09dafa78389a8cf7c470fbacc8011.png

What a servant's heart you have Genesis!

Lastly, Leviticus' budding preacher's heart has been somewhat hampered by his latest fashion choices, but he's not letting that discourage him. 

5acc30890fb2a_04-09-18_7-26-20PM.thumb.png.feaba06c9883f00eb455a53d317aebf0.png

"Hey Billie- for no reason at all, what's your favorite kind of cake? Also if you don't come back to youth group we're going to have to pray for your soul" - Leviticus, probably

And that's a wrap on 2020/year 11. Everyone still gets to sleep at the same time, and there's only 4 children in each room, even if newly-minted sister-mom Genesis (age 11) is sharing with 1-yr old Ruth. They just insisted on sharing. How precious. Coming up in year 12- which Johnson sister will have their baby first and will Billie ever block Leviticus' number?! For now, Eden's out! 

5acc3078056a3_04-09-18_8-03-33PM.thumb.png.0fe6f575b85d791e7c73088b5f821645.png

  • Upvote 6
  • Thank You 1
  • Love 1


10 Comments


Recommended Comments

Jatalie1996

Posted

Hmmm. Is there still time for Billie's soul to be saved in time to be a Godly little future helpmeet for Leviticus? ;) 

Share this comment


Link to comment
neurogirl

Posted

@Jatalie1996 Leviticus is only 9, so there might be time! I would love to see if that’s possible but Leviticus first needs to ditch the stupid bear suit!!!

Share this comment


Link to comment
mango_fandango

Posted

Out of all the kids I've played, fundie or not, the Bear phase has been the most common by far. Evelyn Smith is in a Loud phase currently, but that's not affecting her much except she shouts angrily sometimes. The autonomous action is "shout bad words" but I'm interpreting that as "I HATE FORNICATORS!" or whatever shite fundies spew. 

Share this comment


Link to comment
WineGlass

Posted

I’m exhausted just reading this. What is the Jill reference?

Share this comment


Link to comment
neurogirl

Posted

@WineGlass According to JRod's April 3 post (after going on about her 12 kids, 5 SEVERE miscarriages, and baby 13 on the way):

"We also enjoyed having my sister – Angie Hillegass- with her 7 children come visit us while we were there.  Angie was (at the time) about 4 1/2 months pregnant and I was over 8 months pregnant.  SPECIAL!!"

29511544_2015656238672719_6471398897372584145_n-225x300.jpg.2e3a77cf30c5a97f13712841f0f7197f.jpg

Share this comment


Link to comment
SweetJuly

Posted

@neurogirl I love the Edens, and your amazing commentary :D Please keep the next episodes coming!!

Share this comment


Link to comment
DisgustedofHove

Posted

I love the Edens too! Look forward to the next update, you really make it come alive with your narration.

Share this comment


Link to comment
neurogirl

Posted

Thanks friends! I was delayed because my grad school program is particularly busy atm, and I have some weekends away coming up, but it's nice to know that other people are snark-following the Edens! I may be slower but I hope to steadily see them to at least the end of Eva's fertile years! 

Share this comment


Link to comment
WineGlass

Posted (edited)

I want to see it at least until the children defect and go their own way. 

 

Because every story should have a happy ending. 

Edited by WineGlass

Share this comment


Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Posts

    • SapphireSlytherin

      Posted

      25 minutes ago, Mama Mia said:

      Are they living in a Duggar property? 

      They are not - they are living in the (apparently) church-owned duplex that they moved into when Derick went to "ministry skool" last year.

    • BernRul

      Posted

      4 hours ago, freethemall said:

       

      I also reject the author writing her family's beliefs are not to blame for their practices. The beliefs are the root of their extremism, their patriarchy, their judgement of other "gentiles" not being holy enough, her brother's abuse of her (calling her a whore), their trust in God instead of man (especially with medical matters), and the idea of Mormon men having a priesthood which elevates them to a status that for certain unhealthy personalities can be dangerous. 

      Yeah, same. I understand why she wanted to downplay that, but I can't help feeling that if the family wasn't so religious, than they never would have become so extreme. 

    • Nikedagain?

      Posted

      On 9/20/2018 at 8:43 PM, BernRul said:

      TX is going to eventually become a blue state (or at least a deeply purple state) , and once it does, it will be impossible for Republicans to steal another election. I'm not saying it's going to happen soon, or in time for my baby angel Beto to beat out the Zodiac killer (I do have a feeling Beto will be more successful in 2020 on a broader scale, but who really knows at this point) . It will take years, probably decades, but it will happen in my lifetime for sure.

      BRB, just moving to Texas real quick to vote for Beto. 

      • Love 2
    • Mama Mia

      Posted

      2 hours ago, SassyPants said:

      The Dillards are the only family without any reported income and with a tuition payment due. I think given their propensity/history of supporting debt free living, an explanation for how they financially survive and how they are financing law school is totally warranted. Since Derrick claims they were never paid from TLC and beyond a day or two of substituto teaching, there has been very limited income earned in years...Are they Bonnie and Clyde? IS leave and cleave more than an insider, family joke?

      Student loans? Student loans and a pay-out /settlement from TLC to keep him from suing? - not that he’d have cause, but a $100k to f*off is less of a headache, and pocket change to them. Savings Jill has from years of being on the show / appearances etc.. Maybe he is paid to keep the books for the Duggar enterprises. ? Combo of some/all of the above ? If school is covered through loans - they could get by pretty cheaply. Are they living in a Duggar property? 

    • Rachel333

      Posted

      28 minutes ago, louisa05 said:

      I honestly find it kind of weird that the stuff he says is considered so very shocking or scandalous and all.

      It's not. We're not talking about it because it's shocking or unusual to hold those beliefs. As @formergothardite put it, the only thing surprising here is that he's being public about his beliefs. But I do think that it should be scandalous that he holds racist and misogynist beliefs, no matter how common those beliefs are. And given the more polished image that he and Jinger have projected, I think it's important that people realize how terrible they still are.

      • Love 2


×