Keeping Up With The Dunkels - Chapter 11: A Super Sweet Season of Life

Last time (like two seconds ago) on Keeping Up With the Dunkels, we saw the grand opening of Limited Atonement Church, Abigail settling in to life in the Big Scary City and navigating career and romance, Adalyn starting her courtship with future fundie doctor Hobart, and Aimee Joy trying to find contentment through getting to know Redhair MacBaldy (I will find out his name next time, I swear). Also, some half-forgotten children aged up and stuff.

Abigail was on cloud 9 after her successful sort-of-date with Gilbert, so when he asked her to come out to a local club with him, she was ecstatic! Except he never showed up. Abigail was devastated at first, but then thought, "SCREW HIM!" And made up for all the dancing she was forbidden as a teen.

But Gilbert wasn't done with Abigail! Oh, no. Not at all. He walked by her house twice that night as she was asleep, first just after midnight, then around 3:30 a.m. (I'm not sure if those flames around the thought bubble mean he wants to bang her or murder her, but either way, I'm getting distinct Edward Cullen vibes from this dude.)

In the morning, Abigail found a note tucked into her mailbox. It was from Gilbert! "Dear Abigail," it read, "I'm so terribly sorry about missing our date last night. There was a family emergency and I had to go out of town right away and my phone was dead and my gerbil had the flu. Please forgive me. Yours truly, Gilbert." Abigail was so touched!

The next day she played another gig. She was disappointed not to see Gilbert in the audience, but she figured he must still be out of town.

After the gig was done, she spent some time dancing with friends. She was having such a great time, she almost forgot all about Gilbert.

Until she sat down at the bar and an older woman sat down beside her. "You must be Abigail," said the older woman.

"Yeah, that's right," said Abigail, wondering how this lady knew her name - she didn't seem the type to be into Christian rock music.

"Oh, my son Gilbert told me all about you!"

"Umm..."

This was getting weird, thought Abigail. What was Gilbert's mother doing here? Did she come there to meet her on purpose? Did he send her?

Back at the Dunkel household... OH BABY! Cara had a bathroom baby! Her sisters-in-law were soooooooooo excited to meet their PRECIOUS little NIECE, Charity Dunkel!

Just a few weeks later, Hobart graduated with a degree in fundie medicine and came straight to the Dunkel household to pop the question to Adalyn. Check out that diamond! God must REALLY love her so much more than her sad spinster sisters!

Their precious chaperone Aliviah gave Adalyn a big hug, and Hobart a quick side hug. She was soooooo excited for her sister, and hoped it would be her turn before too long. Aliviah was hoping to be the youngest of all her siblings to marry. If she could find a husband before she turned 18, even better!

"Thank you sooooooo much, Aliviah!" Adalyn exclaimed as her younger sister congratulated her. "You're the best friend a sister could have!"

Meanwhile Hobart thought, "These girls are nitwits. Aliviah's really pretty, though. And she has better fashion sense than Adalyn, and seems like she'd be really sweet and would never argue with anything I say or do. Maybe I should've waited till she turned 18 and proposed to her. Oh well, too late now, I guess."

Uh oh...

Happy Birthday to Adam and Mehrissa Dunkel's firstborn, Benjamin! Benjamin, I'm sorry sweetie, but we can't have a party for you because...

Mama's in labour! Be a good boy and grab some towels and a pair of scissors! Adam! Time to wake up!!!

Way to go, Mehrissa! You're really popping out those arrows for your husband's quiver! It's another bouncing baby boy! 10lbs 4oz! WOW! I'd say you're a rock star, Mehrissa, but you don't believe in rock music - you're a hymn star! Anyway, meet not-so-little Braydon Dunkel.

(No, the game does not give baby weights. I just like torturing Mehrissa.)

Adam wasn't able to work on his Christian writing career quite as much as he would've liked, because he was actually a pretty decent father. Here he is holding little Braxton Dunkel, who hopefully won't be completely forgotten as his family grows... and grows... and grows...

Pastor Andrew Dunkel was so concerned about his sister Abigail's soul that he drove to the big city to try to convince her to come back to the Lord and come home. But when he got there... she wasn't home! Andrew was baffled! "A woman... not at home? But who's cooking? Who's cleaning?" He stood outside for a little longer, certain that she would return any moment, but as the sun began to set he was forced to admit defeat and admit failure... for now.

On the night of Adalyn and Hobart's dream evening wedding, something truly SHOCKING happened (besides Andrew boxing in his underwear, just try to ignore that). Hobart, already dressed in his wedding suit, tried to FRONT HUG Anna Grace! She was SCANDALIZED but had no idea what to do! Should she tell her sister? But Adalyn would be devastated! And the wedding was going to take place any moment! Anna Grace had been raised to never trust her own heart and to never raise a fuss, so in the end she just stayed quiet.

Avalee wept bitterly. Not because she saw what happened between Hobart and Anna Grace. Because she couldn't believe her twin sister was getting married and leaving home, and no godly young man had ever so much as glanced at her countenance!

It was a beautiful candlelit ceremony. The guests applauded and cheered with tears in their eyes as the young couple had their very first kiss.

But unbeknownst to the guests (an unobservant lot), as soon as the vows were over, Adalyn and Hobart began to argue.

"It's time for our ice cream sundae reception!" Adalyn exclaimed.

"What?!" said Hobart. "Adalyn, I told you I didn't want an ice cream reception! It's ridiculous! Are you kidding me?!"

"But Hobart, I love ice cream - "

"Blah blah blah! NO ice cream, and that's final! What kind of a submissive helpmeet are you?!"

But one person did notice the tension and shenanigans in the air at the wedding: Redhair MacBaldy. "I'm extremely upset and shaken to the core by the disturbing behaviour of some of your family members, Aimee Joy! I'm not sure this is the godly family I thought it was!"

Aimee Joy gasped. "But [mumbled name], please, wait! It's not what it seems, I'm sure!"

"Goodbye, Aimee Joy."