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Everything Sucks : A Poem

Maggie Mae



Okay, so it's not really a poem. But here is a list of everything that sucks right now. No particular order of importance. 

Things that are OK. 

  • Upvote 8


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It seems like you're pretty depressed- badly enough to be having executive function issues. You might want to talk to a doctor about that- antidepressants don't have to be a life sentence (mine will be, but I've never NOT been depressed), loads of people only need a little boost to get over a hump. If you're anti-pharmaceutical help, I know there's loads of people here on FJ who've offered an ear to anyone having a terrible time of it. And strange as it may sound, that may help- sometimes when I'm in a rut, all I really need is someone to present my accomplishments to, like my cat does with dead stuff.

RE weight/exercise: no idea about your gym, so obviously YMMV, but my gym has a couple different levels of spin class and the "fun/beginner" level one is honestly pretty accessible. You'd re-acclimate pretty quickly, it's not like you're an actual beginner, and starting to do something about that might help you feel better about everything else. It's also a fabulous excuse to reach out to people- most people don't see "hey, can I come to spin with you this week" as a burden, so you could start re-establishing old friendships in a low-key way.

That probably all sounds like a tremendous amount of work that's impossible and won't help anyway. But that's sad brain talking. You can't trust sad brain, it's trying to fucking kill you.

  • Upvote 6
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Amen!  Good to write it out, huh?  I hope things get better.  Sometimes I turn off the news, in all forms.  I've made a big effort to not read the comments!!!!!   Seriously, WTF is wrong with those people?  I just stopped, I look very rarely.  I take a look at my real life and the real people I interact with and go from that.  So not like the comments section.  Thankfully!  

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Strength and hugs. You are not alone, though I understand completely the feeling.

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  • Posts

    • onekidanddone


      16 minutes ago, Sabine said:

      i guess these guys are out of fucks to give. 


      Yikes.  Hold it. Is this the Hannah who married a Keller the other week? If so it feels like she is aiming here barbs at her own parents as well as JBolb

    • neuroticcat


      1 hour ago, Lovebug said:

      This right here is the million dollar question. 

      It was interesting to read comments on Bobye’s FB page when she was replying to people calling her out for not reporting until now. She kept saying they were misinformed. Very curious…

      I’m gonna bet they were told a watered down version of the Megyn Kelley interview and that the chat with the cop friend was official reporting. They all probably thought that was impressive given that cults usually handle things in house. Certainly the abuse was minimized, and I imagine they were told Josh was “better” later on. 

      Also, one of the lesser horrific things among such huge horrors of this cult-church is he fact that we breeze by that there were weekly updates about Josh-the-teen’s progress at camp/prison to the entire church. Whatever story they spun, the public shaming is insane - can you imagine being a teen/child in that culture knowing that could happen to you if you stepped out of line? You bet Michelle was crying. Maybe she felt sad for Josh, but she was also being publicly shamed for failing at IBLP. No wonder he can smile and shake hands in the courtroom. As a young teen he was publicly shamed, everyone knew about it, and then was required to come back to that community and play his role…and then for TV.

      A long time ago I spoke with the head of a conservative nondenominational Bible school. Some ATI students had come through, and he lit up with anger and  without qualification that he never ever saw anything good come out of ATI/IBLP (not meaning the students but any good come from the teaching). I’ve often thought of that over the years - there may be overlap with fundamentalism or other conservative Christian sects, but all of the teaching is straight up out of Gothard’s disturbed head.


      • Upvote 1
    • Beermeet

      Posted (edited)

      7 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

      He has had that puffy look of someone who drinks to much for a few years now.  That's not about his weight, it's a distinct kind of swelling typical of alcoholics and such.

      I'm very familiar,  sadly.  You're right.  I guess I just wonder about the smell.  Drunks smell like booze.  It's in their pores the next day even.  But, who knows. Mouthwash and cologne exists so,  I'm sure he makes sure to smell right.  They usually do, at first. 

      Edited by Beermeet
    • Bluebirdbluebell


      26 minutes ago, neuroticcat said:

      I mean, her family signed off on her marriage at age 17. IIRC, they were moving out of state. She was the youngest of six or seven - all much older than her. They might have been estranged b/c of their cult beliefs but I think they never really saw or engaged much with her extended family. She mentioned her dad a couple of times but crickets about her mom. On an early special, they went to a family reunion for her dad’s birthday, and it was super weird, almost like the kids had never met any of them. I think a relative or two popped up later on but very much felt estranged or distanced.

      This could have been because her mom died when she was pretty young and everyone was so much older, but I always thought that was rather telling - probably because of my own mom issues. I believe her home life was probably not healthy. Jim Bob grew up with instability - periodic poverty at least - and as a child of alcoholic with anger problems. I’ve always thought Michelle came from at the very least neglect. In general, I think first generation cult converts usually are sucked in b/c of some kind of chaos.

      Michelle's mother died when Michelle was an adult. Also by the time her mother died, Michelle was just starting to pop out the babies. She probably was too busy with her kids to really spend much time with her family.

      JB's representation of his own family has been called into question. It's unclear how much of what he says is true. Grandma Mary and Deanna never confirmed what he said about his own father. Then again Deanna and particularly Mary have enabled JB and fam.

      Interestingly, the "mold house" now owned by Ben and Jessa was originally purchased by Michelle's parents. At some point Michelle's father sold it to Grandma Mary. Then Mary owned it and Josh and Anna lived there in the early days of their marriage. Finally Mary sold it to Ben and Jessa. It shows that the Ruarks wanted live near Michelle.

      I know people in real life who have always reminded me of the Duggars in many ways. These people are always looking for friends and family who will be in awe of them and only want to be praised and adored. They shut out anybody who doesn't basically bow down to them and act like they're so special. JB and Michelle seem to be the same way. JB's father was rumored to be critical of their lifestyle and that may have a lot to do with how JB think of him. If Michelle's siblings were critical of Michelle, I imagine she would have shut them out. Also one of her sisters is a lesbian, while Michelle hates LGBTQ people.

      • Upvote 1
    • fluffernutter


      Here’s what we did today. 🎄 They aren’t kidding about tree shortages in the US! The place we went only had maybe twenty trees left. 


      • Love 1

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