Here are her words. The way she worded this was weird. What would of course give us an answer is knowing her definition of "courted" and "dated" and what she defines as a "serious relationship". People took this to mean the "get to know you" phase. To me, this would make the most sense. If they were real courtships/relationships, then what the heck would she consider to be a serious relationship?
We also have to take into account that our idea of a relationship or dating is obviously radically different than her's - which is kinda weird she used the word courted in a rather casual way here. But perhaps she didn’t mean the Duggar definition of “courted” and that’s why she put it in parentheses.
19 minutes ago, louannems said:
Hanna is 16 months and still not walking. All kids walk on their own time, but 16 months seems very late in walking. She does pull herself up and stand, but my kids did that by 7 months and all walked without falling by 9 to 12 months. I just hope Hanna is ok.
I know Andrea said that almost all of the kids were late walkers, none by 12 months if I recall correctly. I don't think it is considered delayed by medical standards until a child is 18 months and not walking. Hopefully she'll start soon. I wonder if it is partially since they are in such cramped living quarters?
On 9/14/2019 at 1:15 PM, Bad Wolf said:
In the 30s, where I grew up, iron ore was discovered, and a steel company moved in. They built housing, mostly duplexes (semi detached) which were 3 bedroom one bath. Many people came from Scotland. They put in a direct train link to Glasgow. The houses still stand, though the steel company is long gone.
Obviously that wouldn't work in a city,with limited space, but it shows what can be done if companies realize that taking care of their workers, might just increase their profits. Loyalty vs throw away employees.
Something very similar happened here with the Endicott Johnson Shoe Company.
"George F Johnson's reign was dominated by his Square Deal version of welfare capitalism that, like progressive movements of the early twentieth century, advocated providing parades and churches and libraries to "uplift" workers. George F's Square Deal consisted of worker benefits even in harsh economic times that were generous and innovative for their time, but also meant to engender worker loyalty and discourage unionizing.
For workers, the Square Deal consisted of a chance to buy E-J built and E-J financed homes, a profit sharing program, health care from factory-funded medical facilities and later (built in 1949) two worker recreational facilities. But the Square Deal was more than an employee benefit program. E-J and the Johnson family also provided or helped to finance two libraries, theaters, a golf course, swimming pools, carousels, parks and food markets, many of which were available to the community without charge."
And even though EJ is long gone, what they did for our area is still evident today. I actually grew up in an "EJ" home even though my parents didn't work for the company.
For Jill, Jinger and Joy we only found out once they were actually already (almost) engaged right?Edited by CarrotCake
Just now, Koala said:
The recent string of videos leave me with a very uneasy feeling. He is very dismissive of the idea that the kids are anything other than "fine", and almost seems annoyed by Claudia's confusion about the permanence of her mama's death.
He will go all in telling you how awful it is for him. Lord knows, I totally understand that...I can not even begin to imagine. But I also can't imagine not realizing how very much Andrea's babies are hurting, too...
In the park video he declared that he knew he was an "awesome Dad", and said he wasn't worried about their education or running the house (apparently, the kids can do that just fine). He also mentioned instating "punishments" such as detentions or demerits if the kids don't finish their school work. Apparently one of the boys is very concerned about his struggles with math and English- it's been mentioned in the last 2 videos. Naturally, his worries are dismissed. I guess they're just supposed to educate themselves and accept whatever "punishment" is doled out if they fail at the impossible task set before them. That should go well.
In the dinner video, I was shocked by how rude Tom was about the Meal Train. Granted, I am southern. Here, if someone cooks you a meal, you claim to love it no matter what it tastes like. You may toss it in the trash the moment their back is turned, but when it's presented, you express gratitude that someone was kind enough to care.
TIn fact, that would be something to do with the kids, while actually acknowledging their grief. Let them pick a favorite meal that Andrea used to cook, and work on recreating it with them. Or, maybe find some new things they'd like to try. Anything, but teaching them to insult the kindness of others.om was very vocal about the fact that chicken casserole wasn't their "favorite", and kept mentioning that he "supplemented" with grilled cheese. He also kept saying the toaster strudels were a hit.
I skipped over a lot of the last live because, as mentioned previously, I can't watch a lot of Tom and those lives are A LOT of Tom. That's really showing bad manners to complain about the food so much. Fair enough they prefer certain things and dislike others but to speak about it like that, with the people providing said food watching, is rather rude.
I do like Koala's idea of Tom and the kids starting to prepare meals themselves using Andrea's meal cards.
My concern continues for the mental wellbeing and grief processing, of the kids. Tom said again that he won't be looking into professional counselling for the kids. He believes that the extended family's support system is enough.
In most cases of children's grief, there needs to be someone who's an unprejudiced observer to catch the things family and friends overlook or are too close to the child to see. Not necessarily a psychologist/psychiatrist - sometimes it's a school teacher, school counsellor or local clergy (obviously not applicable in this situation) The love and support of family is fantastic, and will be beneficial for sure, but each child is going to have a different way of handling all this. Each child is going to have to deal with so many things that can so very easily be brushed aside, ignored, overlooked or simply considered a quirk - until it's too late or develops into something extremely serious.
Tom says he's not doing okay himself but yet the kids are fine? No Tom! Not all your children are fine and not all of them can get through this without some extra support and care.
(disclosure: I know my focus is about the wellbeing of the kids and this is due to my past. I used to work in the counselling field so this situation gets me a little riled up when children are dismissed as being 'fine')